The train ride protracted endlessly or at least it seemed like it. Joey occupied a window seat and stared blindly at the landscape that was rushing by, morphing into a colorful blur, but she didn’t care nor even actually see it. Her mind was too preoccupied with so many things, that she couldn’t appreciate the beauty of the Cape’s late spring / early summer hues.

Ninety minutes of monotonous humming of the train engine nearly lulled her back into sleep and she was still so deeply into thoughts that she almost missed getting out at her stop.

Despite the fact that there should be a law for weather reflecting your mood, the sun was shining brilliantly and a nice, soft breeze wafted upcountry from the sea. Joey squinted and used her hand to shade her eyes. Since she wasn’t living in Capeside anymore, she relished in the fresh air and the whole atmosphere. Maybe her absence enabled her to perceive everything from a tourist’s point of view.

Scanning the relatively deserted parking lot, she caught sight of his familiar stature and if he hadn’t worn sunglasses, she would’ve been able to see his all too familiar eyes as well.

Waving, Joey hurried towards him and was greeted with a warm hug. She returned the embrace and exhaled. It was amazing, but she instantly felt better. It had to be in the genes.

"Hi, Joey."

"Hey, Doug." Joey stepped back and looked up, smiling just a little.

~*~

Pacey stared at his reflection in the fogged over mirror. What he saw wasn’t pretty, although he felt slightly better after the hot shower.

His eyes were tired and dark rings adorned them. Maybe he was too old to spend a night on a couch, but maybe the eyes actually were mirrors of one’s soul.

He hadn’t shaved and didn’t bother to change that. "See, buddy... you eventually broke your winning streak after all," he muttered morosely, remembering the conversation back in the K-mart.

How did he get from there to the present, godforsaken situation? Right, he let her shave him. How could he ever forget that? But he didn’t regret it. Not one bit and that was the weirdest part.

Wouldn’t it be great to blame everything on the loss of his beard? A scapegoat that wouldn’t mind being found guilty for everything that happened? Of course this was way too easy, not to mention superstitious.

Sighing, he rubbed his scruffy chin, still staring into the mirror.

It seemed as if this was developing into a serious dysfunction of his body: lately he tended to keep rooted to a spot, unable to move, no matter into which direction.

Earlier that morning, when Doug had left for work, he simply returned to the couch, not knowing what to do with himself and feeling that he still wasn’t ready to face Dawson. Doug’s lecture didn’t help either, especially not the part where he reminded him of Joey and how crazy with fear she had to be, since he was too skittish to just call her.

Oh yeah, running without running was a comfortable thing and sleep was a blessing, a mercy that pretended that everything was okay as long as he kept his eyes closed.

Unfortunately his eyes were open now and the broad daylight, permeating through Doug’s notorious cleaner than clean windowpanes felt like a spotlight, luring him to finally get up and do something.

~*~

"How is he?" Joey asked, glancing briefly at Doug before turning her eyes back to the road in front of them.

"Honestly? I don’t know. I don’t even know what exactly happened," Doug replied, gripping the steering wheel a little tighter.

"Welcome to the club," Joey muttered and propped her elbow against the window frame, resting her chin on her fist. Very much like the last tense car trip with another Witter so long ago.

"Huh?" Doug cast a quick side glance at his front seat passenger.

"I don’t know either." Joey sighed, meeting Doug’s inquiring eyes for a split second. "Not really, though." It was definitely in the genes.

"But you know more than you’re telling me," Doug groused. "You know, as much as I merge into this questionable position of a big brother, where various siblings appear out of nowhere, nursing their latest wounds, inflicted by whatever, because that’s exactly where they leave me hanging. I’m good enough for a free place to crash whenever the need arises, but I’m apparently not trustworthy when it comes to talking about problems."

Doug was really angry and hurt, which Joey could understand very well. She felt the same, maybe even more so. Being left out by the one you loved was the worst thing that could happen to you. "He didn’t tell you?"

"Not exactly and he didn’t talk much at all." Doug frowned, it seemed there was a lot more behind the surface than he had imagined.

"I only have some small hints as to what has happened," Joey offered. "Seeing that he didn’t talk to me either... I didn’t even know where he was, where he spent the night... if..." Joey sighed, turning away, not wanting Doug to see the frustrated tears in her eyes.

"I know, I’m sorry. Maybe we can try and put the various pieces together on our way home to the obnoxious person we still love?" Doug suggested.

Joey nodded and started to tell the part she knew about.

"Okay, so I guess it’s fair to assume that my little brother had some sort of fight or argument with his boss and then decided to drive down here? I thought he had reached a point where he would stop acting like this." Doug parked his squad car in front of the apartment building.

"Yeah, but old habits die hard. Believe me." Joey shifted in her seat and gazed up to the windows of Doug’s apartment. It had been a long time since her last visit yet everything looked the same.

Doug considered this a moment and finally turned toward her. "Anyway. I don’t get why he came here. Having trouble with the job? Okay, but how does it help to be in Capeside. Moreover, shouldn’t he be working?"

"What did he tell you?" Joey asked again.

"He showed up around... well, I’m not sure, after eleven p.m. and simply asked to crash on the couch. Granted, I was tired and not exactly in the mood to deal with my brother’s odd tempers or ideas. So I didn’t really grill him about it. He said he had some things to iron out."

"That’s what I thought..." a deep and exhausted sigh escaped Joey’s mouth as she lowered her head.

"Meaning?" Doug’s fingertips drummed impatiently against the steering wheel.

"Umm..." Joey stalled, not sure if she should voice her apprehension or not.

"Please, I won’t run up there and rub it under his nose that I know about... whatever it is. You know that, don’t you?" Doug shook his head, feeling almost offended that neither Joey nor his brother seemed to trust him.

"I do... I just... okay, well... Dawson asked Pacey to invest money for him...a lot of money," Joey explained slowly, worrying her lower lip.

"Oh." Doug inhaled, a deep frown appearing on his forehead. "So you think that..." instead of completing the sentence he squinted his eyes, silently asking for her confirmation.

"That would explain a lot, wouldn’t it?"

Two pairs of wary eyes drifted away from each other and up the facade of the building.

~*~

Somehow Pacey had expected Capeside to be different, to reflect the ultimate catastrophe that was hovering invisibly over the town or at least a kind of foreboding, a dark cloud, people staring at him, pointing their fingers at him, but nothing.

Once he finally found the energy to get up and face the world, or the music, whatever came first, he scuffled slowly in the general direction of the Leery home. Very general though, because he ended up in front of Leery’s Fresh Fish. Well, it was the right name after all. He just needed to work on his internal navigation skills.

Lingering near the entrance, Pacey absent-mindedly ran his fingertips along the wooden rail that separated the outdoor dining area from the sidewalk. Only a few people enjoyed their lunch on the patio and it seemed to be pretty quiet. Something that would change as soon as the waves of tourists rolled in.

His feet moved him inside before he realized it and before he could consider suffering from some wicked kind of masochism.

A quick glance through the dining room transpired that neither Dawson nor Gale were around and Pacey relaxed visibly. Hesitating briefly, his eyes darted around and finally settled on the bar. Why did a drink sound so good right then?

~*~

Plucking the umpteenth napkin into tiny scraps Pacey nursed his second or third drink and stared into thin air. He wasn’t any closer to any idea of how to tell Dawson than he had been the day before.

Audrey pushed the door open and breezed inside, positively sure that it was she who was late this time. Instead of the person she thought to find there, she beheld a certain brunette bumming around at the bar.

Her eyes widened in disbelief as she gasped and exclaimed, "Oh... my... god... My ex-boyfriend is a day drinker. Life is clearly bleak without me!"

Pacey’s head whipped around at the familiar sound of her voice. "Audrey?"

"The one and only." Audrey grinned and slid on the stool next to Pacey. "Hi."

"Hi." Pacey frowned, maybe there had been something in his drink he didn’t know about. "Ahh... hi...what are you doing here?

"Well, what are you doing here?" Audrey grinned and cocked her head to the side.

Pacey sighed and rolled his eyes. "I’m so not in the mood for playing this game."

"Fine then," Audrey mocked, nervously wringing her hands together. "So Joey didn’t tell you?"

Pacey instantly felt a feverish twinge in his heart as he heard Joey’s name. Raising his eyes again to study Audrey, he didn’t reply.

"I take that as a no, right?" Audrey sighed. "To make a long, sad story short: I reacted a little defiantly when the dean wanted to talk to me about the... ummm... time I missed while being in rehab and now I’m expelled. I’ll go back to L.A. but I, well... I made a stopover here first." Her words almost chased themselves in the futile attempt to get everything out and done without having to listen to yet another lecture.

"Expelled?" Somehow this had alerted his attention despite the numb feeling of still being surrounded by fog, very similar to the state you’re in when you’re dreaming and you desperately try to wake yourself.

"Yeah, no biggie," Audrey shrugged it off with a bored wave of her hand.

"No biggie? Aud..." Pacey was wide awake now. He couldn’t have heard her right, could he? Giving up her education had to be a joke.

"No, really. I’m happy to go back home, especially since, well... you know...damn, why didn’t she tell you?" Audrey sighed again.

"Tell me what?" Pacey frowned, totally confused. All this information was way too much to digest and he wasn’t sure if he could deal with any more.

"That I’m with..."

"Pacey, what are you doing here?" Dawson suddenly stepped up next to them, briefly directing his surprise at Pacey before pressing a light kiss against Audrey’s temple. "Sorry for being late again, but this Capeside model is driving me crazy."

Pacey’s eyes widened as he realized the obvious romantic entanglement between Dawson and Audrey. It shouldn’t surprise him, considering the sort of incestuous history of their group, but at that moment it was just another thing being thrown at him, another thing prone to dragging him down.

Audrey smiled uncomfortably, noticing the surprise washing over Pacey’s face and something darker, too. Something she couldn’t quite put her finger on.

"So, Pacey... what brought you down here?" Dawson kept his arm around Audrey’s shoulder. "Is Joey here, too?"

There was the fierce pang again but now it was mixed with a hint of doubt as to why Joey didn’t tell him about Audrey and Dawson. Did she have regrets? Was she angry? Whatever it was, it would fit into his downward spiral.

"Umm, no, she’s not." Pacey cleared his throat, unable to look at Dawson directly. "I’m on a... spontaneous visit to Doug."

"Ah, nice. Well, since you’re here, I have something to show you," Dawson beamed. "What do you think about dinner at my house later?"

"Huh?" Pacey squinted and directed his gaze warily back at the couple in front of him.

"Dinner. At my house. Later," Dawson replied slowly. "What’s wrong with you?"

"Nothing. Yeah, sounds... good. I, well, I kind of have to tell you something, too," Pacey gave up. That was what he came to Capeside for in the first place, wasn’t it?

"Great. Too bad that Joey isn’t here. It would have been a nice chance for a farewell dinner before Aud and I head back to L.A." Dawson tightened his embrace on Audrey. Somehow he was surprised at the lack of interest in their new relationship and he couldn’t help but wonder if Pacey was really that nonchalant about them as he was displaying. "Or... we could have lunch together right now plus dinner tonight," he suggested enthusiastically.

"Umm, thanks, man... but I have...some things to do," Pacey declined distractedly. He wasn’t ready yet, not ready to tell Dawson that all his high flying plans could be thrown out of the window because of his inability, and not ready to face the fact that Audrey and Dawson were a couple either.

It wasn’t like this fact was exactly what was disturbing him that much, well, yes... it did. Like it would always disturb him whenever one of his ex-girlfriends would have a new partner. But what was really burning inside of his brain was the question why Joey hadn’t told him.

"Ah, okay." Dawson’s voice was disappointed and Pacey was once again reminded that Dawson had problems with accepting that not everything in the real world revolved around him.

"Yeah, so... see you later guys." Pacey stood up and placed some dollar bills on the bar to cover his drinks.

"Later." Dawson nodded and turned to the bartender, ordering coffee for Audrey and himself.

"Are you really okay?" Audrey whispered, grabbing Pacey’s wrist as he walked past her. She gazed back at his empty glass, before studying his expression again.

"Yeah, I’m okay," Pacey sighed. He just wanted to leave, but that was rather difficult with Audrey attached to his arm.

"It’s not like you to be drinking..." she couldn’t finish her sentence as Pacey interjected quickly.

"Water? You know, Aud, shouldn’t you be avoiding places like this in the first place?" So maybe that was out of line, but he couldn’t help himself.

"Maybe." Audrey’s face became hard and defiant. "But I have learned my lessons. You can’t hide from your problems forever... and I know you well enough to see that you’re doing just that right now. A quick trip to visit your brother? Please. You’re a little too hardcore to skip work just like that." She snipped her free hand right before his eyes. "And Joey? Wouldn’t she be here, if you were not hiding? I bet she doesn’t even know that you’re here."

"Like I didn’t know you were here and with Dawson. Funny, somehow everything comes back to Dawson," Pacey retorted bitterly.

"Probably because you are always bringing it back to him yourself. You know, therapy works wonders. You should try it one day."

"Whatever. See you later." Her comments hit way too close to home for comfort.

Without a glance back at them, Pacey finally managed to loosen Audrey’s grip on his wrist and left the restaurant. The sunlight was blinding him and he had to squint. Time was running out and he knew only one place where he could possibly calm down enough to be able to think about how he was to deliver the bad information to Dawson.

Audrey stared after him. He never answered her question and she started to worry about him. Contemplating if she should call Joey or not, she rummaged through her handbag in search of her cell phone.

Once she found it and was about to speed dial Joey’s number, Dawson hoisted himself up on the stool Pacey had vacated moments before. He glanced from the silvery phone in her hand back to her eyes. The question, though unspoken, clearly written over his face.

Swallowing unnoticeably Audrey flipped the phone shut and let it glide back into the depth of her bag. "Just checking my messages."

~*~

"I really thought he’d still be here." Doug shrugged helplessly. "When I left, he returned to the couch and stared at some obscure TV shopping show."

"Uh-huh," Joey mumbled as she slowly sank down on the couch. Pacey had simply left his bed for the night like it was, unmade, sloppily... but most important a sign that he had been there. Not that she didn’t believe Doug, but sitting there and being surrounded buy things that just recently were surrounding Pacey made her feel a little safer.

"And... umm.." Doug scratched his head uncomfortably, "I’m sorry, but I really have to get back to work. Dad will corner me about leaving while on duty anyway."

"Yeah, no problem. I’ll try my luck and walk around a little... maybe I’ll go and say hi to my sister," Joey announced but made no attempts of getting ready to get up from the couch.

"Okay... here, a third set of keys... just in case, okay?" Doug offered, dangling keys on a blue chain before her eyes.

"Oh, yeah... thank you." Joey grabbed them and offered him a small smile.

"He might even come back any minute. His car is still here." Doug was stalling as well, torn between trying to find his brother and his sense of duty.

"Right. Well, you know... you can go, really. Don’t worry. It’s enough that you picked me up at the station." Joey pushed her hair back, eyeing Doug carefully. Those Witter brothers were so similar, in certain ways at least and right then, she knew that Doug was berating himself for having left Pacey by himself that morning.

"Yes, right." Sighing Doug relented and walked towards the door. "Anytime... and good luck... you’ll..."

"I’ll call, yes." Offering another smile she watched as Doug finally closed the door behind himself.

Relaxing against the back of the couch for a moment, Joey closed her eyes. The long night was growing on her and she had to keep her thoughts straight. "Where are you, Pacey?" she mumbled and reached for his shirt that was piled on top of the cushion to her left.

Burying her nose in the soft cotton and catching a faint remnant of Pacey’s very own scent she suddenly knew where to start looking first.

~*~

It was still early in the season and the mass of tourists hadn’t swept over Capeside yet. During the morning hours, when most residents were working, the marina was almost deserted, with the exception of some older skippers who were enjoying their pensioner’s life on their boats.

It promised to be a wonderful day for a sailing trip and Pacey wished more than anything that he... that they still had True Love.

Just like during their senior year in high school he had felt drawn to the docks again. The soft sloshing of the waves, mixed with cries of various seabirds and the faint jingle of ships’ bells always had a calming effect on him.

Unconsciously he had selected the very same bench where he had bared his scholastic problems to Joey. Of course, this wasn’t surprising at all, seeing that it was the bench closest to the slip he used most of the time to dock True Love. It was a little bit away from the main area and closer to the guest slips. Most members didn’t like it because it wasn’t as convenient and they also preferred being apart from the guests.

As much as Capeside thrived from the summer tourists, they hated them in equal measures. A love/hate relationship that any town on the Cape could relate to. They needed them for business, for money, but they didn’t want to be mixed with them. Maybe it was pride, maybe stubbornness.

Leaning back and staring out at the sea, Pacey desperately tried to find the answers he was seeking, only that there seemed to be none.

Joey was a little breathless as she reached the docks. She couldn’t help but run after her intuition had guided her there. It was somewhat disturbing that she was always running to the marina in situations like these. Desperation so prominently written over her face.

Stopping to catch her breath, she held her side, the stitches telling her that she wasn’t used to all the running anymore – or maybe she was getting old.

Despite her attempt at resting, her eyes scanned the docks and although it was too far away to be really sure, she could make out a lone figure on a bench. Sighing with satisfaction she slowly moved into that direction.

"Barnacle for your thoughts?" she offered to make her presence known once she was close enough to be in his earshot.

Pacey whipped around, totally surprised to hear Joey’s voice. His eyes were wide as he stared at her like a fata morgana¹.

"You’re not liking me so much right now, are you?" he asked as he finally found his voice. Maybe a repetition of a talk in the past would help to break the ice, especially since it took place exactly at the same spot.

"Not so much, no," Joey replied and sat down next to him.

Both fell silent again, both waiting for the other to start, both feeling that the other owed it to them. A few minutes passed by until both raised their heads and their eyes met.

"Don’t you dare do that to me again," Joey whispered and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him close to her.

She knew they had to talk, but that could wait for a second or two. Right then she needed the tangible proof that he was sitting next to her, that he was alive. Kicking his ass and giving him a piece of her mind for letting her go through a night like the one before would come after that.

Pacey hesitated briefly, still feeling the slight pain of insecurity that resurfaced upon the knowledge that she didn’t tell him about Dawson and Audrey’s new union, plus the even bigger anguish for having proved to be a loser yet again. His faltering lasted but only the fraction of a second before his heart took over and his arms went around her, hugging her tightly to his body. His left hand naturally found its way into her hair, burying his fingers in the silky tresses while his right arm encircled her waist.

Another couple of minutes passed by in which they simply held each other before Joey suddenly drew back, pushing her hands against his chest.

"What on earth were you thinking? Not coming home without a word, a call? I was out of my mind," she tried to keep herself together, but her voice betrayed her and got louder with every syllable.

Pacey cleared his throat and allowing her to land a few blows he was sure he deserved before covering her hands with his own and thus fending off any further slaps. "I guess I wasn’t thinking... relapsing into my good old ‘act first, think later’ pattern."

"I thought we were past that. I thought you knew that... that you can trust me with everything," Joey muttered dejectedly. "I thought at least you’d tell me your reasons for acting like you did, not just exerting your old good-for-all-excuse."

"Yeah, and I thought we were done with keeping secrets, too." Pacey was still holding her hands and although they started to get to the difficult part of the conversation, he didn’t let go.

He felt her tense up at his remark, but she didn’t flinch either.

"What’s that supposed to mean?" Joey frowned, too stunned to be angry about his accusation yet.

"Let’s just say I accidentally ran into Audrey..." Pacey paused and watched her as realization set in, watched as she inhaled sharply and exhaled a shaky breath. "...and Dawson."

"Oh...about that..." Joey licked her lip, trying to explain, but Pacey interrupted her.

"Yeah, about that. Why didn’t you tell me about that? If we are to discuss things."

"That has absolutely nothing to..." Joey scowled.

"Au contraire, I’d say that has as much to do with it. See, I know that I was wrong, but I’m not the only one who fell back into old habits," Pacey argued.

"That’s were you’re wrong." Joey retracted her hands and folded her arms defensively in front of her chest.

"Am I? Then tell me you didn’t keep it quiet because you don’t approve of them being together." Pacey mimicked her pose.

"Oh please," Joey snorted. "You should know me better than that. Do I have to remind you how I reacted when you told me about you and Audrey?"

"Umm... yeah, right... see, I always wondered why you gave us your blessing so easily back then." Pacey cringed at his own words .

"Now you’re pushing it, Witter. You don’t want to go there, believe me." Joey narrowed her eyes at him and if she hadn’t known what was really bothering him, she wouldn’t have been as calm anymore.

"Okay, I’m sorry, that was uncalled for."

"You bet it was." Shaking her head she tried to focus again. "Once and for all, Pacey, I don’t care if Dawson is in a relationship or with whom he is with. And Audrey? You know, I think she’ll be good for him."

Pacey opened his mouth, trying to say something, but she silenced him with a glare and wave of her hand.

"No, now it’s my turn. And why haven’t I told you about them yet? Have you ever stopped to think about when I should have done that? I’ve known it only for a couple of days myself and you weren’t exactly present, where you?" Joey asked pointedly, using the rhetorical question to take a deep breath. "You worked overtime at the firm, you left in the morning with barely a ‘Good morning’ and then... well, you decided to go MIA until now."

Pacey lowered his gaze. Of course she had a point or two there, no, not just that, she was right and he was being an ass. Talking about relapsing into old patterns. The hole he had digged up for himself was getting bigger and bigger.

"Yeah, that...ummm... yeah, okay. I’m sorry. So ... you’d have told me... eventually?" he tried to steer away from his being-a-jerk-route.

"Yes, I would... doofus." Joey’s temper ebbed away and her tone turned softer again. "You know that I love you, Pacey. You and nobody else." Scooting a little closer to him again, she cradled his face, that he still kept bowed, and gently forced him to look at her. "Now tell me what happened at the firm yesterday."

Pacey stared at her, shock evident in his overshadowed eyes. Something in her voice, the way she acted and how she looked at him, told him that she already knew a good deal. "You... ummm... you know... something?"

"I talked to Becky this morning, so yes. I know about Stepatech’s failure and I know about some kind of quarrel between you and Rich. But I want... I need you to tell me what’s going on. Why you felt like running instead of coming to me."

Joey continued to caress his cheek with her thumb until he raised his hands, circling her wrists lightly and leaning his head tiredly against her palm. Taking a deep breath Pacey kissed her soft skin before lacing his fingers through hers and raising his head.

"I messed up, Jo, big time." Shaking his head dejectedly he lowered his eyes again, unable to abide the disappointment he was sure to find in hers.

Joey’s heart ached as she saw how afflicted he was. She wanted to comfort to him, to tell him that no matter what it was, it would be all better soon, that she was there for him, but how could she do that when he didn’t open up towards her. At this point she had only the hear-say information and her own assumptions. Waiting a few heartbeats for him to continue, she eventually settled for squeezing his hand assuringly and brought her free left hand up to his neck again, placing a light kiss on his forehead.

The corners of Pacey’s mouth slightly curled up into a thankful smile but he still couldn’t bring himself to look at her directly.

"Umm... so, what Becky told you is right. Stepatech didn’t get approved and the stock fell to an abyssal low. I lost money, Jo. A lot of money. Money of my clients, my own..." Pacey’s shoulders slumped even more and his voice was barely a whisper as he enumerated his failures. "...Dawson’s money. It’s gone, all gone and it’s my fault."

"Pace..." Joey shook her head softly. She had expected this and she could understand that he was beating himself up for losing Dawson’s money, but she couldn’t understand why he didn’t recognize that this wasn’t his fault, not really at least. "This is bad, it is, but... that’s the stock business."

"Why does everybody tell me that?" Pacey snapped. "Yeah, so that’s business and maybe it is for most of my clients, but Dawson? He called me shortly before this and he wanted to sell and I, I, Joey, asked him to sit it out in order to get as much money out of his investment as possible and now he won’t even get back what he put into it."

Joey ran her left hand soothingly up and down his arm, not reacting to his outburst but trying to bring him back down.

"Remember when Dawson came to you first, asking you to invest his money? Back then you said you’d treat him just like any other customer, right?"

"Yeah, but you know that he never really was like anybody else," Pacey mumbled.

Joey nodded, fully understanding that they were not just talking about Dawson as a business partner. Putting her index finger under his chin, she lifted his face to her until he couldn’t avert his eyes from her.

"Maybe it’s time to realize that he really is like anybody else. Like any other customer and like any other friend. Granted, a friend we’ve known for most of our life, but in the end... he has no elevated position and neither of us has anything to prove to him."

Pacey blinked, not quite knowing what to say, if there was anything to say.

Joey smiled. It was confusing, the realization had hit her only moments ago, so she would grant him a few moments to collect himself. Touching the tip of her nose to his, she confirmed again, "I mean that, sweetheart."

As she still didn’t receive an answer she simply brushed her lips over Pacey’s and immediately felt him not only reciprocate, but deepening their kiss.

It was so easy to lose himself in their kisses, so easy to forget the rest of the world and for a little while he indulged in the luxury of this exquisite feeling of being all alone with her and far away from everything that happened in the reality. They weren’t done yet though and knowing that, Pacey reluctantly drew back and rested his forehead against hers.

As brief as their affectionate exchange had been compared to the conversation they still had to finish, he felt strengthened just by knowing that she was still there with him.

"That’s... umm... not all," he sighed. "That quarrel with Rich? Well, I asked him for some money, I mean to borrow some from him so that I could give Dawson at least his initial sum back. And ... that didn’t go over so well with him and one word gave the other..." Pacey closed his eyes. "He fired me, Jo."

"Oh..." Joey frowned and chewed the inside of her cheek. This was news to her and she didn’t expect this turn at all.

"Yeah..."

"Well..." Joey cleared her throat, searching for something to say that made him feel better, but she knew how much this job meant to him, which didn’t make it any easier. "Maybe he was just in a bad mood and didn’t really mean it."

"Oh believe me, Rich did mean it." Pacey chuckled humorlessly.

"Okay, but if you talk with him, now... after both of you have cooled down. You’re good at your job, too good for him to just let you go," she tried again.

"No. I appreciate the effort, but it’s over Joey. Rich made that pretty clear last night. Let’s see, what did he say? Yeah, right, I’m a loser. That’s what he said," Pacey dismissed bitterly.

"You know that you’re not a loser, Pacey." Joey intensified the squeeze on his hand, needing him to feel her support physically as well.

Pavey gave a short laugh. "Yeah, right."

"Don’t do that, Pace. Don’t go back and give in to your old insecurities. Look how far you’ve come, what you’ve achieved since high school. And you did all of that on your own." Joey wasn’t far away from shaking some sense into him. "Don’t hide your light under a bushel, Pace."

"Why would I? It’s not like it’s that bright anyway," he turned his face away from her, gazing back to the sea.

"Oh for crying out loud. Stop it!" Joe’s voice rose again with frustration. "You’re a great stock broker. Okay, you made a mistake, but you’re not the only one. Even Rich believed in Stepatech. The stock business is a constant roller coaster ride. Up and down and up and down. And if I’m not mistaken, that’s exactly what fascinates you so much. You love the tension and the rush of adrenalin when you pick the right choice."

"It was okay as long as it lasted." Pacey shrugged, still avoiding her eyes.

"Pacey! Okay, so Rich fired you. So what? You don’t even like him particularly and there are so many other stock broker firms out there, who would kill for having you." Joey sighed exhaustedly.

"I envy your ability to be so optimistic." Pacey rubbed the bridge of his nose. Joey’s immense trust in his abilities made him feel slightly uncomfortable. It seemed like he couldn’t fail in her eyes, even though that was exactly what made him afraid of being bound to disappoint her.

"I’ll still be damned if I let your insecurities shake us, Pacey." Joey exhaled audibly and added in a hushed whisper, "Why didn’t you come home?"

"I...umm..." Pacey tried to blink the ashamed tears away that were collecting in his eyes. Ashamed that he didn’t go home, that he caused Joey pain and ashamed of acting like the loser Rich had claimed him to be. "I didn’t want you to feel sorry for me."

"I’ll never feel sorry for you, Pace. I feel for you." Joey wiped the single tear that escaped Pacey’s eye away with her thump, letting her palm linger on his cheek as he sighed. "God, can’t you ever tell the difference?"

"I’m sorry, Jo." Pacey pressed his lips together, feeling totally like an idiot.

"I know..." Joey continued to stroke his cheek and kissed his temple. "You know, a sorrow shared is a sorrow halved. And that’s true for almost anything. You’re not alone, Pacey. You have me and I’m there for you. We might not have exchanged those heavy words, pregnant with meaning," she paused. "We didn’t say in good or in bad times, but that’s what I feel. What kind of relationship would we have if we were only in for the sunny, happy days? You've been there for me in my worst times. Why can’t you let me be there for you?"

"Jo... I know that, but I never wanted to... hold you back, to drag you down..."

"You’re not doing that, Pacey. Not at all. And it’s not only me who’s there for you. Your friends are, too, your brother and believe it or not, your whole family."

Pacey coughed, "I’m stupid, huh?"

"Nah, you’re still emotionally retarded... but we’re working on that." Joey smiled her famous half smile.

~*~

"Yes, I found him, Doug. Actually... we’re back at your apartment for a little while and then we’ll go and see Dawson." Joey leaned against the wall and stared out of the window while talking to Doug, clutching her cell phone with her right hand.

"So, was... is it about the money?" Doug broached the subject again, but sighed with relief that his baby brother was back were he belonged.

"Yeah, that and... well, there’s something else related to that, but I think you should talk about that with Pacey directly." Joey played with the tips of her hair, unconsciously examining the number of spliced ends.

"Yeah, maybe. So how’s he doing?" Doug shifted in his car seat, again concentrating more on Pacey than on his job.

"Better, I think, but he’s still down. More so since we still have to fill Dawson in," Joey sighed. She was so not looking forward to that, but she wouldn’t let Pacey go all alone either.

"Yeah. He shouldn’t have mixed private life with business. Nothing good ever comes from it."

"I know." Joey heard Pacey turn off the shower and checked her watch. "Well, we’ve got to go in a few minutes. See you later?"

"Depends on where you’re staying?" Doug scratched his head, silently hoping that they would move over to the B & B. As much as he loved both of them, having them together in his bachelor pad, especially when Pacey had something to make - up to Joey... no, he didn’t even want to think about that... or where they would do that, or maybe they already had before she called him. Making a mental note to strip his bed linens as soon as he got home, he waited anxiously for Joey’s reply.

"Umm, I’ve talked to Bessie and she wasn’t sure yet if my room would be free. So I don’t know. But hopefully we can crash there tonight," she finally answered.

"Oh, great," Doug sighed again with relief. "Well, then I’d say we’ll meet for breakfast tomorrow at the B & B?"

"Okay, and if we can’t stay there, we’ll call again."

"Okay..." Doug sent a quick prayer up to whoever was listening to him. "Bye."

"Bye." Joey closed her phone and stretched her tired limbs.

"Bye?" Pacey asked, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind, slightly startling her.

"Huh? God, you almost gave me a heart attack," she protested, annoyed. She simply hated being snuck up upon like that.

"I’m sorry," Pacey whispered against her ear and kissed the column of her neck.

"Yeah, right... and that was your brother. I totally forgot to call back the troops who went in search of you." Although everything was good between them again, it wouldn’t hurt to remind him a few times about the worries he had caused.

"Sorry," Pacey mumbled sheepishly.

"Ready for dinner at the Leery’s?" Joey asked, changing the subject.

"No. Can’t say that. I still have no idea how to explain that to him." Pacey sighed and ran his hand through his damp hair.

"Just tell him what happened. The truth, Pace." Joey suggested, leaning her head against his shoulder. "And remember that you’re not alone. I’ll be right there. Just tell him, like you’d want to be told."

"I wish that would be as easy in practice." Pacey pulled her even tighter against him, wishing not only that, but that they would have it behind them already.

~*~

"Ready?" Joey asked softly, reaching for Pacey’s hand after he locked the car.

"If I say no, can we go away and pretend it’s a week earlier and nothing of the last twenty-four hours happened?" he sighed, seeking comfort from the feeling of her smaller hand in his own.

"Unfortunately, no." Joey shrugged apologetically, sucking on her bottom lip.

"Damn," Pacey muttered and suddenly stopped walking, causing Joey to stumble slightly as she bumped against him.

"Oww, Pacey..." she grumbled as he caught her just in time.

"Sorry. It’s just that... you know, this feels like bad déjà vu, you know? Us standing here on this lawn..."

Joey blew some air out and gazed at the white house in front of them. It looked like it always did, a little too big, warm and inviting nevertheless and representing huge parts of their childhood.

"Yeah, I know, but this time we’ll do it right, okay?" Joey stepped forward so that she was facing Pacey. "We’ll go in together and I’ll be right by your side when you tell him."

"So I take it you don’t want to step in for me here?" He knew he was stalling, but he couldn’t help it.

"No."

"Oh well, it was worth a try." Pacey stated deploringly.

"Sure." Joey shook her head, featuring another half smile. "Now let’s go. The sooner we get in there, the sooner it’s over."

She had practically to drag him towards the porch, but she was determined to do what had to be done. The door was probably open like it always was, still it seemed inappropriate to simply barge in like they used to in the past. After sharing another glance at each other, Pacey straightened and finally knocked.

~*~

Dawson and Audrey were in the kitchen when they heard a faint knocking sound at the front door and it took a few seconds before Dawson answered it. Much to his surprise he found Pacey and Joey on his porch.

"Joey!" he exclaimed happily, ignoring Pacey for a moment and stepped closer to embrace her.

"Umm... hi, Dawson." Joey felt slightly uncomfortable and hurried their greeting, eager to leave his friendly gesture.

"Pacey said you weren’t here." Dawson smiled brightly. "It’s so good to see you."

"Yeah, I wasn’t sure if I could manage to come down today," Joey explained, using a little white lie.

Dawson’s grin grew even wider. "I’m sure glad you could manage after all and Audrey will be, too. Umm, hey Pacey."

Pacey sighed, feeling a little left out, like always. "Hey. So, don’t you want to ask us inside?"

"Always hungry, huh, Pacey?" Dawson teased and stepped to the side, opening the door wider to let them in.

"Let the fun begin." Pacey pushed the door closed, muttering to himself. He watched as Dawson ushered Joey into the kitchen.

Seconds later Audrey’s shrill shriek troubled their ears. "Awwww, bunny! That’s what I call a surprise."

"And what a surprise indeed," Pacey thought as he rounded the corner to the kitchen just in time to see Joey being almost crushed by a nearly hysteric Audrey.

~*~

Pacey wasn’t really surprised to see that their dinner was sponsored by Leery’s Fresh Fish, knowing that neither Dawson nor Audrey were actually able to cook anything. For Audrey even the comparably simple task of boiling water bordered on an extreme adventure.

At least his final square meal wouldn’t kill him.

For most of the dinner their conversation consisted of merely shallow chitchat, which was always initiated by either Dawson or Audrey. They were talking about their plans for L.A. and Dawson’s ideas for his movie.

The latter topic made Pacey squirm on his chair and only Joey’s hand on his knee could calm him a little.

"Talking about The Creek, I really have to show you something." Dawson dabbed his lips with a paper napkin and pushed his chair back, already standing up.

"The Creek?" Joey asked doubtfully and frowned.

"Oh, don’t ask... now he won’t stop...ever," Audrey moaned and rolled her eyes.

Dawson ignored her remark and his eyes twinkled with enthusiasm. "Yeah, didn’t I tell you the title? I thought I did. Hmm, anyway, it seemed like the perfect choice, since the film depicts our lives and experiences, which were...are... all connected to Capeside and the creek. Think about it: Joey, Jen and I all live right at the creek and Pacey? You spent most of your time here or..." Dawson paused and cleared his throat. "Or at Joey’s. We shot the Monster From The Creek... so yeah, The Creek is the best title.

Joey cast a side glance at Pacey. Both cringed at Dawson’s little impromptu speech, knowing that it would only get worse from there.

"You’re finished, aren’t you?" Dawson asked and stared pointedly at their plates, where they had only picked from.

"Umm...yeah. Sorry, I guess we had too much for lunch." Pacey folded his napkin. There was no use in delaying the inevitable, so they could as well get started.

"No problem, then...follow me upstairs..." Dawson’s voice was almost conspiratorial as he climbed the stairs and led them to his bedroom.

The door was closed and he waited until all four of them were standing right in front of it.

"Be prepared... it’s kinda creepy, I guess," Audrey snickered, linking her arm with Dawson’s.

"Aaand.... after you guys." Dawson opened the door, giving it a push so that it swung to the side, unblocking the view into his room.

Joey’s eyes grew wide and she and Pacey voiced their surprise in unison, "Wow."

Stepping further inside, they slowly took all the details of the transformation in. Actually it wasn’t quite a transformation. It was more like traveling back in time, as if they were back to the summer of six years ago.

"It's pretty crazy, huh? Took me forever. I want to make sure everything is perfect. What do you think?" Dawson asked proudly.

"Well..." Joey was at a loss of words. The room brought back so many memories and Audrey was right. It was creepy, but in a different sense then from what she thought. It was obvious that Dawson was more than a little obsessed with their teenage years.

"Well, I would say that this officially makes you the king of procrastination." Pacey wrapped his arm around Joey’s waist, needing the contact as well as trying to comfort her, too.

"No, no, no," Dawson chuckled amused. "We're going to shoot in here. I know it's tight, but I figured out a way to make the camera fit. And by saving money on locations, we can afford to go all out on everything else."

"And that’s exactly what’s so creepy... have you seen all those tiny cameras he’s put up?" Audrey pointed at various cameras on the ceiling and the big one perched into the corner to her left. "I refused to sleep here and compelled him to move into the guest bedroom."

"Man," Pacey laughed forcedly. "Being in this room, it just takes me back to a whole other era. When the future was a clean slate for all of us, you know?" He felt absolutely awful. There Dawson was raving about his plans and he was listening, fully knowing that those dreams were already crushed.

"Well, the room may have gone back in time, but I think all of us have moved ahead rather nicely. It's about all the obstacles we went through when we were kids. We ended up doing exactly what we wanted to do," Dawson grinned and gesticulated wildly.

"Did we? I’d say we’re still on our way," Joey leaned closer to Pacey but eyed Dawson.

"Umm... yeah, well... but we’re all doing something we’re good at. I’m realizing my dream of making movies, you’re at Worthington, Audrey has her music and Pacey is succeeding as a broker. So it does look pretty good for us, doesn’t it?" Dawson frowned, not understanding why his friend sported such serious expressions on their faces.

"Well, there was that brief period of time I toyed with the idea of being a rodeo clown, but I guess this'll do," Pacey chuckled, tightening his arm around Joey.

"But you made something of yourself, Pace, and now you're making something out of me. Actually, all of you are the reason why I’m finally able to do what I always wanted." Dawson nodded, emphasizing what he was saying.

"I... I don't know that you should go that far. I mean, you had done this by yourself. Right? Even if you had nothing, this would..." Pacey rambled feeling nothing but guilty as cold sweat spread over his skin.

"I'm not...I'm... you're not hearing me, man. I'm... I'm trying to thank you. You and Joey...and I’m trying to apologize for..." Dawson licked his lips nervously. He was never good at admitting his own mistakes.

"Well, you're welcome, I guess, but, come on, Dawson, I mean, we all knew you'd do this. This was your dream. You just... needed to take a little trip down memory lane, right?" Pacey couldn’t bear to hear him say anything that remotely resembled an apology. He knew he had to admit his own failure soon, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it.

"Yeah..." Dawson frowned. "I needed that and a very financially savvy associate producer. I'm giving you credit on the film. So..." he walked over to his desk, grabbing a script and offered it to Pacey.

"You're part of this now. So, welcome to Hollywood, where people have meaningless titles for not even showing up on set. And Joey? Well, I’d love you to read my script...and, well... I wanted to ask you if you’d like going through it like... my editor? You know, sometimes I tend to ramble and... write things no real person would say, so... what do you say? You’re getting credits, too, of course."

Pacey and Joey stared at each other in shock. This time Joey spoke up first.

"Umm, that’s really... flattering... especially after, well.... after you know..." closing her eyes she desperately tried to come up with something to say, but couldn’t find anything. It was strange, that in those kind of situations all those big words and empty phrases all of them were tossing around so frequently, were suddenly erased from her mind.

"Okay." Dawson frowned again, still completely oblivious to why Joey and Pacey seemed so stressed. "I hope you don't think that I gave it to you so that you could just say all the obligatory nice things." Maybe she thought he wanted to make up for their brief encounter at her birthday. He was genuinely sad that he couldn’t read her anymore like he was used to.

"No, why would I feel obligated? We never just exchanged niceties, we could... always... tell us the truth, right?" Joey exhaled, shifting around and feeling more than uncomfortable.

"Yeah, right. I just thought... your reaction... and Pacey... I know that a lot went wrong between us, and most of it, well... I’m just realizing that now and...." Dawson shook his head, glancing at Audrey who was unusually quiet.

Audrey raised her shoulders and shrugged slightly. She felt that something was not right and somewhere deep down she had sensed it the second she saw Pacey at the restaurant. She wasn’t about to meddle in any way. It wasn’t just the fact that she felt like it wasn’t her place, or that Dawson’s movie centered around his childhood friends, who weren’t just friends, but way more. More than she could ever describe, for lacking in any close friendships before she had met Joey and somehow became part of this little, sometimes almost dysfunctional, close group of friends. She felt excluded in some ways, but right then she was relieved.

"Okay..." Pacey ran his hand through his hair and briefly connected his eyes to Joey’s. "Now, I’m... well, Dawson, look...I don’t know what to say, this..." he raised the script he was still holding, "This is a huge honor to me, that you’d even consider including me that much into your film. I’m sure, Joey feels the same and if we seem a little off here... well... there’s something I have to tell you," he sighed and removed his arm from Joey. He needed to do this on his own, it was his fault after all.

Dawson frowned, staring at him, then at Joey who’d cast her eyes downward, seemingly infatuated with the tips of her shoes. "You’re starting to scare me a little."

"Yeah, I know. Alright." Pacey tightened his grip on the manuscript, holding it almost like a shield in front of him. "I had a reason for coming to Capeside and it wasn’t to visit my brother. I came here to talk to you."

Pausing again his eyes drifted to Audrey, who was leaning against the doorframe, somewhat stoically, and then back at Dawson, but he couldn’t quite hold his gaze. "Man, and we were just gettin' back to be friends, too. It's such a shame to ruin that."

"What are you talking about? What would ruin it?" Dawson was alarmed and if it wasn’t for Joey’s demeanor and Pacey’s absolutely serious tone, he’d have thought they were making fun of him.

"Money. Money would ruin it," Pacey blurted and pressed his lips together as if he had accidentally gave away something that was supposed to be a secret.

"What happened?" Dawson whispered, suddenly feeling cold from deep within.

Pacey swallowed thickly and raised his head bravely. The least he could do was delivering the news with a little bit of pride left. "It's gone. Your money's gone, my money's gone, hundred’s of people’s money is gone..."

~*~

A long, grave stretch of silence ensued after Pacey’s revelation as all four stared at each other. Dawson paled visibly as he tried to digest what he had just heard. Audrey clasped one hand over her mouth, not knowing what to think at all. She was torn between feeling for Pacey or Dawson, but she didn’t grasp the full meaning. Money was one of the things she never really had to think about, it was just there and if not... there was always Daddy.

"What...what do you mean gone? That was all the money that I had," Dawson asked suddenly, the words nearly catching in his throat.

Pacey sighed and let his hands drop helplessly. "I know it was, Dawson, and I honestly thought Stepatech was gonna take off, I swear to you."

"Right." Dawson scoffed and a hot red blush flushed his face, as the expected anger came through. "Yeah, of course. Otherwise, why would you blatantly ignore my request to sell the stock?"

"Man, I was just tryin' to do the right thing," Pacey tried to defend himself. "And it’s not like I pressured you into keeping your stocks. I asked you if you could wait a little for the chance of getting the most of your investment."

"Ah, damn it, Pacey, this..." Dawson interrupted himself, trying to gather his thoughts together.

"No, I had the best intentions, okay? I’m sorry, very sorry, believe me... but... with stocks... you can never be sure at one hundred percent." Pacey played distractedly with the script in his right hand, hoping to make Dawson understand.

Joey stood awkwardly at Pacey’s side, rubbing his back softly in an attempt to show him that she was there for him. She had expected this, but actually being right in the middle of this brought tears to her eyes. The whole situation was horrible, but there was nothing she could do.

Exchanging a glance with Audrey she was comforted that she was apparently feeling as helpless as she did herself.

Dawson stared at Joey but addressed Pacey again. "You're always tryin' to do the right thing. You're always so eager to be the hero, you never quite see all the pieces of the puzzle." He sighed in frustration and ran his hand through his hair. "Did you ever stop to think about what this means to me?"

"Dawson... you came to me because you thought I could help make something of it, and somehow this comes back yet again to the fact that I screwed you over?" Pacey balled his hand into a fist. Of course, Dawson would pull that.

Joey stepped forward, still not knowing what to do, but realizing that she had to do something before Pacey and Dawson would get physical. "Ok, you know what, you two? Let's just stick to the topic at hand. Okay? So we can just solve this problem and trying to get calm... and we'll talk about it."

Dawson snorted and threw his hands up. "Joey, talking about this is not gonna solve anything."

Joey frowned. "What are you talking about? If we sit down and talk about it..."

"He means it's not about money, Jo." Pacey reached for her hand, silently apologizing for interrupting her, before he turned his head towards Dawson again. If he wanted it to be like that, he would go for it. "So fine then, let's just talk about what's really going on here."

"Boys, please..." Audrey interjected weakly.

"Yeah, you know what?" Joey used the brief moment of surprise, where Dawson glanced at Audrey to continue her intervening plan. "There’s no use in drudging up old baggage from the past here. I mean... this," she waved her hand, pointing from Pacey to Dawson and back again, "This is purely a business exchange between the both of you. And I... I think we should keep it at that."

"She’s right. God, Dawson. I’m sorry that you lost money, but I’m sure we can..." Audrey jumped in.

"Yeah, it’s business between us, 'cause god knows we haven't been best friends in a long time, have we?" Dawson ignored Audrey who had reached for his arm, almost shaking her hand away as he moved forward, pointing his index finger at Pacey.

"No, we certainly have not." Pacey nodded calmly. He had expected this.

"You wanna know why we're not friends, Pacey?" Dawson hissed. "It's not because of what happened with Joey, even though that turned my world upside down. It's because from that day forward, I realized that you hadn't been my friend for... maybe quite some time, 'cause the second you made us competitors..."

Audrey sighed and crossed her arms in front of her chest. Her eyes were directed downward and she tried to mask the hurt she felt at Dawson’s comment. Although she knew all about the complicated history between those three from all available points of view, the infamous triangle, that in reality never was one to begin with. Despite the fact that she knew that Dawson really liked her, she couldn’t help but feel like the second choice yet again. It was her own fault, of course. The relationship with Pacey should have taught her that. Both men would always compare every other woman with Joey Potter. It was like a law of nature.

Pacey laughed almost amused by Dawson’s ability to create his own truth over and over again. "That I made us competitors? No. Now you're rewriting history, Dawson."

"I remember when my best friend had a choice and chose to turn his back on me. If you'd ever..." Dawson continued.

"No! You stop right there, Dawson." Joey raised her voice a notch, determined to finalize the direction Dawson pursued yet again. "We’ve been down that road so many times and you know that’s just bullshit."

Pacey raised his brow and tilted his head. It was seldom that Joey was using expletives and it was even more rare that she used them in front of other people.

"That’s just great, Joey. Stick to Pacey, pick up the shards he’s leaving in his wake all the time." Dawson folded his arms and glared at her.

"That’s what couples do, Dawson," Audrey huffed. "Besides, you’re the one who leaves shards in your trail." She shook her head sadly and left the room without another word. It wasn’t her place to sort things out and Dawson didn’t give her any sign that he wanted her to be there, either.

Dawson stared after her, not quite realizing what had happened. "Great. Just great. As if I hadn’t enough to deal with. Why did you two even come here? Set out to ruin my life step by step? At least that’s something you’re good at, Pacey."

"How dare you..." Joey inhaled sharply.

"No, how dare you? You had the nerve to sit through dinner without saying anything, like nothing happened and now? You act like it’s not Pacey’s fault," Dawson almost shouted. "He’s the one who lost everything."

Pacey narrowed his eyes on Dawson. True, helost the money, but his tone did nothing but augur ill. "Right, but that’s mostly because of the risky..."

"Oh yeah, play it down. That’s so typical for you. But I shouldn’t be surprised. What did you do anyway? Putting on a suit and slaving away at something that doesn’t even interest you? Pretending to know what you were doing?" Dawson fumed and paced his room. "You made money. Congratulations. You impressed us all."

"How dare you. You know nothing about me, man. I was good at my job." Pacey yelled as well.

"Then why am I broke?" Dawson asked snidely, cooly.

"Because that's life! I didn't make that choice! I didn’t lose your money on purpose. What do you want from me, man?" Pacey paddled with his arms in midair, needing to vent or otherwise he would have lunged for him. "Does this make you happy, that you're back on top now? I mean, you always liked it better when you were in charge, so is this what you wanted? Does this make it all right?"

Dawson laughed quickly. "There nothing that could make it all right ever again."

Pacey nodded, shaking his head all the while. He really didn’t expect anything else. "Yeah, thought so."

"Ok, can you guys just stop it? I can't stand here and listen to you guys do this anymore. It’s ridiculous," Joey muttered and walked towards the door. "You know what, Dawson? I’m sorry that you lost your money and I know how horribly you must feel right now, but this? Nothing justifies your behavior. It’s not fair to label Pacey as your personal scapegoat for whatever it is at the moment. You need to calm down, maybe then you’ll be able to talk about this like a civilized human being. Like an adult who knows what it means to invest in stocks and who knows what friendship means." Taking a deep breath she nodded at Pacey, silently communicating with him, before turning around and walking down the stairs.

Pacey followed her with his eyes and sighed. "I didn't mean to lose your money. I didn't know that that would happen. I'm sorry."

There was nothing more to say really and Dawson didn’t even look at him. Pacey slowly started to follow Joey and just as he was about to turn around the corner, he heard him mumble something.

"Yeah, so am I." Dawson pushed his hands into his pockets, still not looking at Pacey. "This was just a big mistake from the beginning, I guess."

"Yeah. Maybe." Pacey wasn’t sure if Dawson was listening or not and it wasn’t really important.

~*~

"Hey." Joey leaned against the doorframe and gazed at Audrey who was sitting on the couch, staring at the opposite wall.

"Hey." Audrey turned her head, acknowledging Joey’s presence. "Are they beating each other up yet?"

"Maybe... no? Who knows?" Joey shrugged and slumped down on the couch, too. "There’s the proof that you should never ever mix business with friendship... or even just, well... old acquaintances."

"Yeah. That, too," Audrey sighed and hugged her knees up to her chest.

"Meaning?" Joey stared at her and frowned.

"Meaning... that you should never have a relationship with one of your friend’s ex-boyfriends, let alone with two of her ex-boyfriends." Audrey pressed her lips together, not wanting to go there, but it was inevitable.

"I’m sorry, Audrey... I..." Joey started to apologize but to be honest she wasn’t sure for what really.

"Nah. It’s Dawson who should apologize." Audrey smiled sadly. It was just her luck that she fell for each of Joey’s past and current men in her life.

"What are you going to do?" Joey asked quietly.

"Dunno. I guess for starters... Dawson has to think about a few things... preferably on the couch tonight. Under the circumstances I should give him another chance, don’t you think?"

"Yeah. After all... Dawson can be one of the good ones – if he wants to." Joey couldn’t help but grin. Where did that come from? "You really like him, don’t you?"

"I do... I do." Audrey quickly wiped her eyes.

~*~

"Jo?" Pacey stood in the doorway, wanting nothing more than to leave.

Joey turned her head, quickly checking for any signs on how it had went on the upper floor, but his expression was just stoic and tired. "Ready?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Okay, I’m coming." Standing up she touched Audrey’s shoulder and whispered in her ear, "Good luck and don’t give up too easily."

"I won’t." Audrey affirmed and glanced at Pacey. "Night, you two."

Good night, Aud," Pacey gave a quick wave with his hand and waited for Joey.

Placing his hand on her lower back he guided her towards the door and closed his eyes briefly once it closed behind them.

"So?" Joey raised her brow and wrapped her arm around his waist.

"So... well, that went as expected, didn’t it?" Pacey sighed and pulled her closer to him, feeling completely drained.

"I guess... but don’t take it to heart so much. He’s hurt right now and most of what he said..." Joey tried to put him at ease.

"No, don’t. You were right, you know? This isn’t your fight, Jo." Pacey pointed towards the dock with his chin and Joey nodded slightly.

They crossed the lawn and walked down the dock. No matter how much time had passed or would pass in the future, this dock would always play an important role in their lives. So many decisions had been made there, so many things had occurred on that silent, wooden witness.

The creek was dark, only reflecting the bright shadows from the stars above. Something they missed in the big city.

Joey pulled on the lapel of Pacey’s jacket and eased them down, sitting there like they used to do, legs dangling over the edge and staring into the night.

For a few minutes they didn’t say anything, but thought about what happened and what they should do now, if there was anything left to do.

Joey cast side glances at Pacey, knowing that he was brooding and that he needed this. Lacing her fingers with his, she leaned her head against his shoulder. "Give it a little time, Pace, but... you, well... it’s up to you to make it right and I mean the both of you. It’s been over for so long, you have to put it at rest, make peace with it, with each other. Neither of you would be hurting so much if it weren’t for the friendship that’s still there. Buried underneath all those old issues, under your stubbornness. Maybe this was necessary, to get to your lowest point so that you two could start from scratch and go back to the foundation..."

"I don’t know how to make it right," Pacey mumbled and kissed the back of her hand.

Suppressing yet another sigh he enveloped her in his arms. Staring back at the house he tightened their embrace.

Pronunciation: "fä-t&-mor-'gä-n&, -'ga-
Function: noun
Etymology: Italian, literally, Morgan le Fay (sorceress of Arthurian legend)
confer: mirage

Pronunciation: m&-'räzh

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