Today: A TALE OF TWO SISTERS
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. That probably means that everything was hunky-dory.
Wait. Is that how that book starts? Or is it "Call me Ishmael"? No, I think I'm right. Anyway, back to the story.
So, everything was great in the land of . . . well, for the sake of keeping everyone annonymous, we'll call it . . . the land of Bell-injure household. There were three children in the Bell-injure house: the oldest, we'll call her Darah; the youngest, we'll call her Beckuh; and the middle child, we'll call her Melly.
Everything was hunky-dory, that is, until one day when Melly decided to find some guy to set Darah up with.
It started out innocent enough. Melly set up a web page, www.geocities.com/black_grape345/winadate.html , so that guys could come on and sign up to win a date with Darah. Sure, there were the wierd guys who looked like they had done more drugs than Kurt Cobain, and the girls who signed up as a joke, and even some of Darah's friends who signed up their brothers and some guy (Steph, you know what I mean!).
Well, after Darah went to college, Melly decided that she would keep trying to find a guy for Darah. So, she searched on Yahoo! (ok, go ahead. sing it with me: 'Ya-hooooooo!' got it out of your system, now? good. back to the story.) Where was I? Oh, yeah. So, Melly searched on Yahoo! for a guy who she could set up with her sister.
After a couple weeks of looking and talking to guys, she was sitting at the Bell-injure's computer late one night when a guy said that he went to UW-FR, the same school that Darah goes to. (That's University of the Weird-Front Row, to those of you who don't know how I'm doing this whole name-change thing.)
Melly asks him how old he is. He says he's a freshman. Quickly, she tells Darah this.
Hmm. A freshman. Well, at least the narrows it down to only a couple thousand people instead of a bunch thousand, right?
So, Melly looks at his profile and calls Darah into the Bell-injure office.
Guess what? Darah recognized the guy. So, what does Melly do? She assumes that just because Darah has seen him before, she must be in love with him. Let me tell you, she wasn't. He just happened to live in the same dorm, Bruised Apple. (OK, I live in Crabtree, for all of you who don't know.)
So, Melly decides that she's going to set up this guy, who we'll call Ed, with here sister. Melly tells Darah that she should expect Ed at around 6pm on Monday night so that they can go eat dinner together.
Darah had a class until 6. Darn. She was disappointed.
OK, not really. I've gotta tell you, Darah is not a really superficial person who thinks that looks are everything. She is far from that, ok? But, she had talked to Ed before, and she thought that he was, to put it kinda nicely, a real dork. No personality, very geeky, and not the prettiest flower in the pot. Go ahead and judge Darah for thinking this, but trust me, if you had met this guy, you'd think so, too.
So, anyway, eventually Darah got this guy to leave her alone. One day she was sitting in her room and he came by at 6. The next day, she was sitting in her room, and he came by at 6. The next day, she was sitting in her room, and she closed the door at 6. That pretty much ended it.
Well, the whole Ed thing dissipated, and it was forgotten for about three weeks.
So, to continue our Tale of Two Sisters, we'll start with how Darah was going to surprise Melly one weekend by taking her to a haunted house for halloween. We'll say that they were going to a place called SwampCornField to go to Bad Dream. Well, Melly found out about it because the mother in the Bell-injure's household let it slip, so it wasn't much of a great surprise anymore. Melly had to skip a party and Darah felt bad.
To make this story even better, Melly seems to be showing feelings of resentment towards Darah. Maybe Darah shouldn't come home as often and stuff, then Melly wouldn't get so mad all the time.
But, anyway, Darah eventually apologized to Melly for calling her Melly (I'm sorry for calling you Melly!) And everything was once again hunky-dory in Bell-injure land.
Oh, yeah. And it's a good thing that the whole Ed thing didn't work out, because Darah just found out that she wouldn't be able to compete for Ed. Ed's boyfriend probably wouldn't like it.
Yes, I'm serious.
You heard that right. If not, read it over again. If you still don't get it, then e-mail me and I'll explain to you how Ed's gay.
Well, bi, actually.
-Sarah