| My AK-47 |
| By: Hope |
| The night Britney was in Chicago for a concert I decided to go surprise my best buddy. The girls came with as usual. I grabbed my AK-47 and headed down the road to her lovely concert. Ok so it was a loooong road but hey, anyways. The traffic was horrid, why would so many people go to see some hypocritical bitch lip-sync and do what she calls "dancing"? We didn't have tickets because I would never waste my money on that goob of a bitch(WTF if a "goob" anyways?). My intial plan was to go up to a security guard and beg like the girls in All Access 99 with Nsync. I went up to a guy in a bright yellow shirt and began my tirade. Vicki and Angelina walked by me with handfuls of souvenirs and got into the line to enter the venue. "Hey, what the fuck are you doing?" They both looked at me with big grins and handed their tickets to the ticket lady. The nerve, my girls abandoning me to see my arch enemy! I began to restlessly hit on the clueless security guard. Then I realized my job was pointless so I put my hands on his crotch area. That did something, he led me through a door in the back and into a small room. He made me suck him but as he tried to get me to fuck him I kicked him in his throbbing erection and he fell to the ground quickly. Thank God he choked too. I stole his backstage pass and ran off in a direction I hoped would lead me to Bitchney. I entered a room and came face to face to a panting Britney having hardcore sex with yet another one of her gay dancers. She can never get enough of them. I pulled out my gun and she sighed her, uh, terror. "Oh lordy! I, like, can't take anymore sex. Not another totally hot hitman sending his bitch to come get me. Tell the guy after the like, uh, ummmm you know that thing I do I'll give it to him. Also, like totally tell him that him and his boys can stop bring guns because I'll do it ithout force, cuz I'm from Louisianna." I rolled my eyes and left. I sat in the car waiting for the damn concert to end so I can bring Vicki and Angelina home. BTW, my crew enjoyed the concert, ugh! It was the best concert ever. I would to to another one too. (Vicki) I was forced, by ummmmm......Vicki's sexy brother. (Angelina) P.S. I hope Vicki wasn't serious about wanting to go to a Britney story. I hope she was as serious as this story is real. |