| Victim Impact Statement
presented in Albany County District Court
December 17, 1998
(this statement has been edited from the original)
This statement reflects not only my own thoughts and feelings,
but those of my other children and my family.
Its impossible to sum up in a few words what one person�s life meant,
what their life meant to them, what their life meant to their family,
and to their friends.
To those of us who knew Daphne, to those of us who loved her, we understand.
We know the special place she held in our lives,
we know the special place she will always hold in our thoughts,
and forever in our hearts.
Its very difficult to express your sympathy to someone who has lost a child.
People mean well and I appreciate their thoughts and prayers,
but when I�m told I should trust in the Lord, that Daphne is in a better place now,
that Daphne is in the protective arms of my parents,
that she will never be unhappy again,
that she will never cry again � it just doesn�t help.
The Lord gave her life. The Lord gave Daphne so many gifts,
she was loving, gentle, affectionate, and sweet.
She was bright, witty, humorous, and talented.
Daphne was beautiful. Daphne was vibrant.
The Lord gave her the strength and vitality to live a long Iife.
I cannot believe
and nothing will ever convince me that the Lord
had anything but a wonderful life planned for Daphne.
And I am selfish, I want her here,
I want her where she is supposed to be. I want Daphne with me.
I miss her so much.
Daphne was not taken away from us by an act of God,
she did not quietly and peacefully pass away in her sleep.
There wasn�t a merciful rest from a lifetime of suffering.
Daphne was young and healthy and full of life.
Daphne was only 15, she had her whole life ahead of her.
She deserved the very best that life had to offer
and it was all taken away from her.
There was no mercy in her death, there was no peace,
and she did not go without a fight.
She fought for the one thing worth fighting for
� she fought for her life �
and lost.
It was not an accident, it was not an illness
or even something so dramatic as a bolt of lightening
but it was just as powerful and just as deadly
� it was Kevin Robinson.
He had no regard for her life, for her right to live.
Daphne was a child that he had no right to be near.
Daphne was a person whose life he had no right to take.
Not a day passes that I don�t think of Daphne,
that I don�t look for her,
that I don�t cry for her. I surround myself with pictures of Daphne
taken over the 15 short years of her life.
The only comfort I can find is in my memories,
looking at her beautiful face, seeing smiles
that are unmarred by any knowledge of Kevin Robinson.
On May 1st 1982, she was placed in my arms for the first time,
just minutes after she took her first breath.
She was so precious, her face so flawless, her hair so soft.
As I looked upon this beautiful little creature
I named her Daphne Kristel.
It wasn�t long before she earned the nickname Daphi,
for her exuberance of life.
I had often described Daphi as having infectious enthusiasm.
She brought life to everything.
She believed in the good in people,
she trusted, she cared, she loved.
Daphi was extremely hyperactive but she also had a calming effect.
Her tenderness and sweetness were genuine.
She had the ability to uplift and brighten our spirits
even in moments when we were faced with sadness.
Daphne was my little girl, my baby.
Daphne was a wonderful person who filled my heart with love.
She brought joy to my life
and to the lives of those she touched.
Daphne�s brothers, Erik and Jason, remember
the little girl she was when they moved out of the home
to start families of their own.
They are devastated that their little sister is gone.
They were just beginning to build that special friendship
that happens as brothers and sisters outgrow their toys
and begin sharing their thoughts, their dreams, and their hopes for the future.
Daphne�s sister, Samara, is heartbroken
for they were very close at heart even though many miles
physically separated them.
With her sister�s help, Daphne was re-entering the church
and in August of �97, Daphne was baptized a second time
with Samara proudly looking on.
Kimberli was just three years older than Daphne
and when they were little they quarreled endlessly.
But over the years they formed a bond much stronger than sisterhood.
They were best friends who were separated
when Kim went off to college.
A separation that Kim regrets
because of the time she lost with Daphne.
My sisters, Judie and Linda, remember how loving,
gentle, and affectionate Daphne was.
How she sparked excitement at any family gathering.
For my friends and others,
Daphne may have only touched their lives for a brief moment in time,
but they too are deeply affected and feel the loss.
Daphne�s niece and nephew, Arika and Michael,
are too young to remember how Daphne held them and played with them.
They are too young to remember Daphne,
but we will tell them when they are older
how much Daphne loved each of them.
Daphne�s 5 year old niece adored her. Everyday Cinnamon asks
-- Where is Daphi? --
we don�t know what to tell her.
We cannot tell her that she will see Daphne in a few short years.
There will be no family visits,
no cards or letters, no phone calls,
no holidays to share, no milestones to mark on the calendar,
only a picture of a young girl
who will be fifteen forever.
Someday Cinnamon will be old enough to be told what happened,
but like the rest of Daphne�s family,
she will never understand why.
I may not have wanted Daphne to be pregnant,
but she was.
She was far too young, but with help,
Daphne would have been a wonderful mother
because if there was one thing that Daphne did well
it was in giving love and care.
Although the baby was conceived for all the wrong reasons,
she wanted to keep the baby
and that was her choice to make.
I would not have argued otherwise.
I would have helped her in any way possible.
I would have loved that child
because it was a part of Daphne and a part of me,
regardless of the fact
that Kevin Robinson fathered that child.
Others have judged Daphne. They had no right to judge her.
She was the victim.
That is something that never should be forgotten.
I would like to believe in the long years ahead
that Daphne would be remembered for who she really was,
because her life meant much more than what was portrayed here.
A life that touches the hearts of others
lives on forever
and that is the way I want Daphne remembered.
As Daphne was quick to point out,
she was not perfect.
Being a teenager is not an easy thing.
She was a young girl desperately trying to fit
in a society that judges you not for the person you are
but for the outward shell that you portray,
for the groups you belong to, for the clothes you wear,
for the things you possess.
In trying to fit in, when she allowed others to see the real Daphne
she suffered taunts and ridicule.
She built a wall around the real Daphi,
the person she would only show those who loved her,
those she knew who did not judge her.
She knew a lot of people
but there were few who knew Daphi.
In trying to gain acceptance she made mistakes.
As a mother, I wanted to protect my child
from the pain of growing up, protect her from harm.
But we cannot lock our children up away from this world.
We trust and we pray that the people our children meet along the way
will not hurt them in any manner.
While Daphne is in no way to blame for what happened,
her greatest mistake was in placing trust in Kevin Robinson.
For all of Daphne�s mistakes,
for all that she was and all that she wasn�t,
she had the right to live.
For everything there is a beginning and an end.
If I were to ask anything of you, Kevin,
it is that I want to know when.
Daphne deserves a time of her own.
A time to mark her place,
for the time she spent with us.
Only you can tell us that.
Even though her spirit lives on in my heart
her time on this earth is very precious to me.
There are family members who have faith
strong enough to allow them to forgive you,
for they believe your eternal ultimate judgement is coming.
But I cannot forgive you, I never will.
Kevin Robinson, you took my daughter�s life,
you destroyed my family.
I wish you could feel what I feel.
I wish you could suffer as I do.
I wish for you to feel the pain and terror Daphne felt.
I pray for your family and your children,
that they may find some peace in their lives
for the ordeal that you have put them through.
But even more so, I pray for my family
that they may find the strength to go on
in a world without Daphne, in a world where you still exist.
My days are empty without Daphne.
In everything I do there is an empty place
where Daphne should be at my side.
My family is broken, the pieces cannot be put back together
because one important piece, Daphne,
will always be missing.
My nights are filled with horror by thoughts of the pain and terror
she experienced by your hand.
Night after night, I have laid in bed unable to fall asleep
because the images of what you did to Daphne
play over and over and over again in my mind.
When sleep does come, it is filled with nightmares of you
and I wake up wanting to scream, not for myself
-- but for Daphne.
What you did to Daphne tears me apart
and will haunt be forever.
Not a day passes that I don�t look for the strength to go on,
to continue a life without Daphne.
Some mornings I still go into her room to wake her,
but she�s not there, and never will be again.
You feel so hopeless because you keep looking,
keep searching, keep longing
for someone who you know is gone forever.
And forever is such a long time.
The grief that I feel over losing my Daphne
is very difficult to put into words.
Sometimes the feeling of despair
becomes so overwhelming, so oppressive,
that it literally takes my breath away.
I never know what sound or what sight
is going to trigger in my mind a memory.
And while the memories of Daphne are so sweet,
with them comes the realization that she is gone.
And each time that realization hits my heart
it is devastating.
Never again will I see
Daphne�s beautiful blue eyes and her bright smile.
Never again will I hear her sing.
Never again will I hear her laugh
or hear her giggle.
Never again will I see her eyes light up
with childlike wonder on Christmas morning.
I will never see her dressed up for the prom
or see her graduate from high school.
I will never see her walk down the aisle in a wedding dress.
I will never see Daphne hold her baby,
my grandchild.
She will never experience the joy of having a child
who would have brightened each day of her life
as she did mine.
Daphne will never fulfill her dreams,
she will never do the things she longed for,
the things she had a right to look forward to.
I believe I accept it even less now than I did before.
The numbness of the shock is wearing off.
Its the reality of it now that hurts.
I keep waiting for someone to tell me its not true.
Everyday I wait for someone to say
�We�re sorry, we made a mistake, it wasn�t Daphne.�
I can remember being told,
those are words I�ll never forget.
Ask any parent what frightens them the most
where their children are concerned,
its hearing those words,
its facing the reality that something has happened to your child.
Next week is Christmas.
Daphne loved holidays but then
Daphne was the type of person that holidays were made for.
She didn�t just enjoy them,
Daphne celebrated them with every ounce of energy she had.
But now for me it is just another painful reminder
of the loneliness and emptiness in my life with Daphne gone.
I cannot help but think what you have done to my life,
what all has changed because of you.
I know life goes on,
and I know I have to learn how to pick up some of the pieces
but so much of what I have lost I can never get back.
You have created a whole new existence for me
-- it is filled with feelings of loneliness and despair,
pain and sorrow, fear and hatred.
These are not feelings I want to have.
Time may ease some of the pain
but I will never get over the loneliness I feel for Daphne.
With the help of a loving family and a few good friends
I hope to get over the feelings of despair
but nothing will ever erase the hatred I feel toward you
for what you did to my Daphne
and what you have done to my life since.
It matters not -- that you, Kevin Robinson, had steady employment.
It matters not -- that you were thought of as a good tenant or a good neighbor.
It matters not -- that you have adopted this complacent attitude in the courtroom.
It matters not -- what kind of person you were thought to be.
What matters is the person you are.
What matters is the monster you are.
What matters is that you preyed upon a child
for your animal urges and depraved gratification.
What matters is that you enslaved a child
to cater to your needs, a child who thought she loved you.
A child who was much too young to realize
that love does not demoralize,
love does not physically hurt,
love does not come at a price of dignity or humanity.
And love should never cost you your life.
What matters is that you are sick and twisted.
What matters is that you are an animal.
What matters is that you took a human life.
What matters is what you did to Daphne,
when she was alive and as she begged for her life.
What matters is the life you took from Daphne.
What matters is the life you are taking from me.
What matters is the sadness
you have brought to those who knew Daphne,
to this community, and to your own family.
What matters is the pain and sorrow
that surrounds my family because of you.
We must never forget what Kevin Robinson did.
I know I never will.
Daphne was sexually molested by Kevin Robinson.
She was severely beaten by Kevin Robinson,
and as she begged for her life
and as she screamed for him to stop,
she was viciously stabbed 17 times by Kevin Robinson.
He took her lifeless body up to the Summit.
He dragged her body over rocks and gravel,
logs and branches,
down a hill path and dumped her in a clump of trees.
And there her body froze.
Its a very lonely place,
and he left her there, he was done with her,
he hoped she would not be found.
I cannot say that I am satisfied with the verdict.
I believe in my heart and my mind
that your actions were intentional and deliberate
because only a bastard such as you are
would do what you did to Daphne when she was alive
and only a coward such as you are
would kill to cover it up.
I strongly believe that even in death
Daphne has been treated unjustly.
I strongly believe that there are others
who know more about what happened
and I beg for them to come forward.
I believe the verdict
was more a judgement of Daphne than of you.
But regardless of the actual verdict,
you were found guilty by our legal system that we all must obey.
You now face a possible twenty years in prison for taking Daphne�s life.
Is it enough -- NO!
Are thirty years enough -- NO!
Because in thirty years
Daphne doesn�t get to come back.
She doesn�t get to live out a rich and full life,
a life she deserved.
A life you took away from her.
You took a lifetime away from Daphne.
If you ask me is there any just punishment
for you for killing Daphne, I�d have to say no.
Even death for you would not be enough.
Nothing will ever bring her back.
No power on this earth and no court in this land
can ever bring back my Daphne.
Throughout this ordeal I have watched you Kevin
and you don't seem to take anything seriously,
not even your own life and what is going to happen to you.
You have shown no compassion, no remorse.
I have been appalled by your behavior in the courtroom,
outraged and sickened at your ability and gall to laugh
as you awaited the verdict.
You are a cold-hearted, brutal and savage killer.
At one time you held Daphne�s life in your hands,
you gave yourself the power to choose whether she lived or died.
You made that choice. I will never ask you why.
Could any reason ever be an excuse for what you did.
But I want you to look at me
and tell me that you are sorry
even though I will not believe it.
I want you to look at me and beg for my forgiveness
even though I will not give it.
And I want you to look at me
and know how much I hate you.
Daphne didn�t die because of who she was.
Daphne didn�t die because she was a child.
Daphne didn�t die because she was pregnant.
Daphne died because you murdered her.
Daphne died because you viciously beat her
and stabbed her over and over and over.
Daphne died by your hand. Daphne died because of you.
If we lived in an uncivilized world like you do,
I would be the first to break down the door to get at you
and made you suffer like you did Daphne.
But I can't do that, I cannot live for revenge.
I cannot take life into my own hands like you did.
I can only hope that your life now
will do to you what my own hands cannot.
Many of those here today have seen the pictures of Daphne.
You have seen what Kevin Robinson did to her.
You Kevin, did not have to look,
you saw it first-hand, you know what you did.
Can you imagine what it was like when I saw her,
when I saw what you had done to my child.
I was praying that it would not be Daphne.
Her face was barely recognizable
but it does not take much for a parent to know their child.
Little things like the shape of her nose, and of her hands,
familiar scars from childhood bumps and scraps
told my eyes what my mind and my heart still refuse to believe.
I sometimes think back to when you were first charged with Daphne�s murder
and I told the Prosecuting Attorney I wanted the death penalty for you.
I don�t regret it, I believe it is what you deserve and then some.
But in one very small respect
it is a relief, to my peace of mind, to my values,
that I do not have to live out my life
with the knowledge that I was involved in any way
in the death of another human being, such as you are.
I do not know how you can live with yourself
because you are totally responsible for killing someone,
for taking Daphne�s life.
I do not know how you can look at yourself in the mirror
knowing full well what you did.
You held a life in your hands and you single-handedly destroyed it.
I do not know how you can look
at those two beautiful little girls of yours
knowing that you took the life of my Daphi,
that you took my little girl away from me.
That is the knowledge you have to live with
for the rest of your life.
I hope it torments you. I hope it destroys you.
I hope it eats at you day in and day out
until there is nothing left of you.
It is up to the court to decide your sentence
and although there will never be justice for Daphne,
I beg of the court for Daphne�s sake,
for her family, for myself,
and for other parent�s who pray for their children�s safety,
to give you the maximum sentence on each count.
And I sincerely pray
that your life be one of misery, desperation, and desolation
because you gave yourself the power,
the right to decide that the value of life,
Daphne�s life, was unimportant.
I want you to remember Daphne.
I want you to see her face before you
every day for the rest of your life.
I want you to remember what you did
when you brutally, viciously, and deliberately took Daphne�s life
and the life of what would have been her child.
With no reservation I can say
that I look forward to the day you die,
and may you rot in hell.
Its time to send you away.
Its time to put the trial away and behind us.
My family and I are tired.
We want to have the peace and quiet now,
that is needed, to allow us to grieve for our Daphne.
We want to be left with our memories.
Its time to go on with our lives.
Even though there will always be an emptiness in my life,
knowing that you are in prison
will give me some peace of mind
because there will never be another child
that will die by your hand.
And I promise you this --
if you ever come up for parole,
if it is within my power I will be there.
I will do anything within the law
to keep you locked up where you belong.
Before I finish here,
I would like to share my most intimate memory of Daphne.
A memory I wish I didn�t have.
On November 17th 1997, fifteen and a half years
after she came into this world,
I held Daphne in my arms for the last time.
My little girl, once more at peace
and you could not hurt her anymore.
She wore a knit cap with Elmo on it
to cover her hair which was still matted with blood and dirt.
Her face, where I use to see a smile
that would light up my day,
was heavily covered with makeup to protect the family
from seeing the gruesome wounds caused by you beating her.
Her hands, that had so lovingly caressed my face not long before,
once so delicate and soft,
were lacerated and grotesquely bruised.
Her hands,
that she used to defend herself from you.
As I held Daphne for the last time
I thought of the life she had,
how she deserved more, so much more.
I thought of how hard she tried to be liked,
to be accepted for who she really was.
I thought of how the only acceptance she ever gained,
the only love she received,
unconditionally,
was from her family.
I thought of how much I loved her
and how beautiful she will always be to me.
The greatest gift a mother could ever receive
is a wonderful daughter like Daphne.
I was blessed when Daphne came into my life
and my life will never be the same now that she is gone.
Kevin Robinson, you took from me someone I loved
more than life itself.
You took from me all happiness
and hope for the future.
You took from me a precious part
of my mind, body, heart, and soul.
You took from me my child.
You took from me my Daphi.
I have her pictures, her belongings, and my memories
but all that was my little girl,
my Daphi, is gone.
A part of me died
when Daphne took her last breath
and a part of me died
when I looked at Daphne's beautiful face
and held her for the last time.
Never again will I hold Daphne in my arms.
I will never see my Daphne again.
In this lifetime.
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