Pet Hates of The Month

Stuff that pisses us off, Cartman style


INDIE

Fairground People Who Keep Spinning You on The Waltzers.

Just because two attractive girls get on, it doesn’t mean you have to spin their carriage at warp speed to impress them.  Having their faces pressed back that way by gravity is not the way to a girls heart, trust me boys.  We will not fall in love with you when we get as dizzy as fuck.

Moving.

It’s that time of year again when I have to start being nice to all those people I know who have vans.

Lilies.

Pretty flowers.  Badass staining pollen.  Orangey yellow streaky pollen marks do not go with anything, trust me.

 

People Who Sit Behind You At Work And Look At Your Screen All Day.

I hate hate hate this.  Because it means I have to do proper work and can’t mess about on the Internet like I should be.  Goddamn it, when will people realise that I do not come into work to do WORK?  I come here for the free coffee and drinks and stationery, to make long distance phone calls and to abuse the Internet connection and make use of all this software.

BLANCO

Baseball Caps.

Because they are fugly, functionality should be no forfeit with fashion.

People Who Don’t Say Please or Thank You.

Bad manners piss me off.  Courtesy costs you nothing.  Rudeness costs you my eternal hatred and venom forevermore.

Cricket.

It’s as boring as fuck, I don’t understand the rules and who in their right minds would play an outdoors game on grass and mud dressed in WHITE.  Stain much?

SNOWBUNNY

Line Managers/Managers/Directors…

Anyone else get the impression I have a problem with authority?

Lemons .

Sour ass skanky fruit.  It doesn’t make for nice sherbetty sweeties, tho. .

© Indie

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