They lay face-to-face, kissing and admiring, legs and arms entwined; simply satiated and satisfied.

"How are we going to do this Liz?"

"I thought we were doing it just fine," she snorted.

"I meant being with each other..."

"Sex?" she chuckled.

"Dating," he tapped her nose. "You're in Dallas and I'm in Austin. I can do the weekend thing or make an occasional business trip during the week, but it's not what I really want."

"What do you really want?"

"I want you with me."

Elizabeth sat up straight. "What are we talking about here?"

Darcy shrugged and sat up as well. "I love you, you love me..."

"Don't bring Barney into this! Tell me what you want from me and I'll let you know if I can give it."

He thought for a moment. "Move in with me?"

She tried not to show her disappointment. "Then what?"

"Give up..." He raised an eyebrow and flared his nostrils. "... bounty hunting."

Although that is exactly what she was planning to do, what right did he have to run her life? She bit down to control her quivering lip. "And then what?"

"Be my slave." He kissed her cheek. "Warm by bed." He kissed her nose. "Bear me sons," he smiled wickedly.

"Why I ought to..."

Elizabeth pounced on Darcy; they wrestled and laughed for quite a while.

At length, Darcy pinned Elizabeth's arms against the bed, then leaned over her. "Marry me?"

"No."

"No?! Why not?!"

"Convince me."

"I thought that's what I've been doing for the last 2 days."

"Try harder," she smiled cheekily.

"At your service, Madam."

And so it was.

If the hubbub of downtown Dallas came to a screeching halt, if all vegetation within and without the surrounding sprawl stopped growing, if fish and fowl ceased flipping and flapping, and if every trivial meaningless conversation were suspended, one might hear the answer. If Mrs. Bennet and her current gossip-fest would suddenly dry up, she might hear the 'Yes! Yes!! YES!!!' cries, er, um, agreements of her second oldest unmarried daughter.

*****

"I'm not kidding, Will. Bud does not like cats."

"Neither do I!" he laughed.

"But Gina does!"

"Seriously, all we have to do is introduce them, properly. They'll get along just fine."

Elizabeth shook her head. "You don't know what..."

"All will be well, Liz." Darcy took hold of Bud's leash and led her out of the car.

Mrs. Reynolds stood at the door. "Welcome back, Miss Bennet!"

"Thank you," she smiled apprehensively, then looked at Darcy. "You did tell her I was here to stay didn't you?" she whispered.

"Of course!" he laughed as Elizabeth blushed. "Mrs. Reynolds could you have someone unpack Miss Bennet's car and put them in her room?"

"Right away, Sir!" Mrs. Reynolds turned on her heel and walked into the house.

Elizabeth stood at the foot of the stairs looking up, in awe.

"Something wrong?" Darcy embraced her from behind.

"I didn't really get to see it last time I was here... Beautiful!"

Darcy nuzzled her neck. "Indeed!" he whispered.

At that moment, Georgiana came to the door with Fluffy the cat in her arms. "Welcome ho..."

The cat hissed vehemently as he jumped out of Georgiana's reach. The dog barked with fervor as she lunged forward and finally free from the less than hardy hold that Darcy supposedly had on her leash.

Fluffy bolted through the downstairs area and started upstairs, stopped to piss all over the bottom four steps, then took off back down the stairs with Bud sliding into furniture from the slick hardwood floors, but still hot on the cat's trail. Darcy, Georgiana, and now a slew of staff were running this way and that.

Elizabeth remained outside on her knees, laughing to beat all. "Come on down to Bud's Luv Connection!" she guffawed.

As is typical with a large household staff, everyone had an inspiration as to how to stop the chase; one brilliant idea came from Darcy, he had ordered the back door to be opened. Seeing that this was a ticket to freedom, Fluffy took off for the great outdoors and Bud followed, of course. Unluckily, on the way outdoors, the big ox of a dog happened to pass by some cans of paint in the middle of the kitchen floor, knocking over a can of primer in the process. It was only 1/3 full, a blessing in disguise although Darcy didn't think so at the time, but it was also the type of primer that sticks to everything: the cabinets, the walls, the chairs, the cushions.

Anyway, back to the story... How Fluffy ended up in the swimming pool is a mystery they had yet to solve, but that is where he was, swimming to the edge while Bud waited for him to try to escape. Georgiana had no idea that her cat could swim! This is when the humans stepped into the barking/hissing fracas to break it up.

Needless to say that wet, frightened cats are often not what one would call 'friendly', and as Georgiana went to rescue Fluffy from the water, he freaked out and bit her. All the staff scurried around Georgiana who was screaming and crying and Darcy cursing at the top of his lungs at Bud, and on a Sunday no less.

Elizabeth now calmly watching the entire scene with great interest; there was nothing she could do; Bud would not listen to her calls and whistles when her mind was set on a meal.

Fluffy, in an attempt to save his life, ran under the deck and hid underneath the hot tub where he stayed all night and into the next morning. Darcy could not get the cat out from under to kill it, so he left Fluffy there, hoping that the raccoons would do the job for him. Bud landed in jail, or rather the garage, for the rest of the night; they could not risk letting her out into the yard because Fluffy was still out there. Georgiana had finally been calmed down by Mrs. Reynolds' soothing ministrations and voice. Elizabeth managed to take the hunting rifle away from Darcy before they went to bed.

Finally, around 9 a.m. the next morning, Fluffy decided to risk life and limb and come out from his hiding place and into the house. Darcy let Bud loose in the yard and later banished the cat to the staff level where one of the children would take care of him. Towards mid afternoon, Bud was let into the house and she must have spent 20 minutes looking for Fluffy, but, Thank God, did not find him.

First things first... That slap that Elizabeth gave to Caroline way back when... Well, on a cool summer evening in early August, at a quaint little restaurant in downtown Dallas, Elizabeth had been working during her summer break to earn extra money for law school. Incidentally, Caroline was dining with a few friends at said restaurant. Of course, she was spouting off some obscenities about Jane being a horrendous wife and mother and that she had the personality of a... um, er, a passed around sheep. Needless to say, that Elizabeth was bussing tables nearby when she heard those callous remarks and left her own calluses and handprint on the left side of Caroline's face.

As Caroline scrambled to her feet, Elizabeth dared her to rebut and, of course, she did not, instead Caroline called for the manager. Elizabeth was fired that same evening, but overjoyed in the reason for it. And for reasons only known to Mr. Bennet, Elizabeth remained at school during her summers. Over the course of the ensuing years, they met infrequently, remained aloof in each other's company, but shared a fervent dislike to last a lifetime.

But Caroline could not leave it at that. Let bygones be bygones? AS IF!!! No, Caroline vowed to ruin Elizabeth, but since she could not find anything out on her, other than suspecting she was illegitimate, she decided on the rest of the family, even Jane, but obviously the one with children out-of-wedlock would be prime rib for her rapacious appetite. Unbeknownst to anyone, Caroline befriended Lydia and learned the sordid truth. Aghast that Darcy's 'best friend' was the father of Lydia's children, she surmised that Darcy knew more than he was willing to share. Even further, when Darcy and Wickham's relationship turned to ice, she was more than sure that Darcy found out and threw off his friend as soon as possible. But she needed more evidence and, of course, Lydia let it slip of Darcy's involvement. Now Caroline was furious, curious, and determined to find out all she could; ergo breaking into Darcy's office. Once done, Caroline abandoned her 'new best friend' like last year's shoes and kept the truth to herself until it was to her advantage to speak freely. But as we know, that backfired on her!

After the last incident in this particular story (the fake wedding invitation), Elizabeth did have another chance to thrash Caroline. Yes she did indeed! However, Elizabeth looked so beautiful in her wedding gown and had just married the man of their dreams, that she could only raise an eyebrow in mock pity and included a sly smile as Darcy carried her away to their limo.

*****

That said... You're probably wondering why Ava Russell so willingly accepted the invitation to persecute her 'dear friend' Caroline. Well, it was a well-known fact that when her husband had his heart attack and subsequently died shortly thereafter, he was in the arms of a certain young lady, that we all know and loathe. Mrs. Russell played the grieving widow, of course, but she knew of Mr. Russell's after-hour activities, or rather midnight rendezvous, and she was rewarded handsomely for her wifely unconcern by the monies in his will. It was just that Caroline Bingley was so obvious in her schemes, but to flaunt it in Ava's face was more than necessary. Revenge is sweet, once satisfied and its carnal appetite satiated.

*****

It had long been suspected by the 'Authorities' that Catherine de Bourgh was, in some way, involved in the elder Darcy's death. During the trial, Mrs. Annesley, nee Jenkinson, implicated her to the fullest extent. Apparently, Catherine had obtained the dry cleaning service used by the elder Mr. Darcy and each pair of pants and shirt processed were lined with the tiniest of needles; undetectable to the naked eye and filled with one drop of blood coagulant. Thereby, the elder Darcy would receive a slight irritation from the dry cleaned item, while it administered its slow death.

A side note: the real Mrs. Jessica Annesley was actually hired by the elder Darcy before his death. However, once she found out, Catherine planned her early demise by way of a free trip to a Florida Resort and an untimely visit by a very hungry crocodile. She was speedily replaced with Ms. Emily Jenkinson, a long time friend from the old neighborhood; of course, coinciding with the death of the elder Darcy.

You're probably asking... Why was Catherine trippin'? Well, the tale about her wanting Darcy as a son-in-law was concise; she thought him a fine specimen for her daughter and together they would be able to produce many heirs to the family holdings. Being single-minded and determined, she pummeled these suppositions into her daughter's head, as well. Thus the plan was set in stone. After the elder Darcy abruptly broke off relations and partnerships, Catherine's instincts told her that he might have realized her true background. When he refused to talk to her, she knew it to be true. Thus the schemes were set upon.

William Collins was also planted into the D.A.'s office, as a mole by Catherine for she knew that Darcy and Charlotte were close friends and Collins would be able to keep an eye on him. And yes, Collins had been tailing Elizabeth ever since she and Darcy left the hospital. When Mrs. Annesley, sorry... Jenkinson, called him on his car phone to say that Elizabeth was sneaking out into the night, he buzzed the limo-patrol and followed her until they caught up. Regardless of what the Corleone's paid him, Collins' worst nightmare was waiting in cellblock 4. Blood curdling screams could be heard nightly. It was a fine bedtime story for the rest of the prisoners!

Catherine's end was befitting the nobledom she had clamored so violently for. The throne (her favorite chair) that she ruled her society from, was fitted for such a propitious occasion. She sat regally in front of her accusers; narrowed her eyes just a bit, but said nothing as Darcy pulled the handle. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT! Smoke curled around her lifeless frame. Darcy was compelled to pull the handle again, but a soft hand and the even softer voice of his wife, stayed him.

*****

For all those in the dark about the Dashwood's (Yes, distant cousins to the good doctors). Carleton Harville had indeed driven James Benwick home that fateful night and walked the 2 miles back to his own car. They only thing he was holding back from Elizabeth were his dark thoughts that his ex-wife could have been the killer.

Marianne Harville was turned over to her father, Carleton, after he recovered from surgery, and they lived happily ever after, or as much as one could want in these situations. Oh, about the ladybug tattoo... Bethany and Corrine had such a fascination about the little creature, and Carleton loving his stepdaughters so, thought it a wonderful testimony to their being a real family, that he had himself branded.

Mrs. Dashwood stated the following facts in her confession: with careful planning, Fantella knew that Benwick had returned home that weekend, she put Ipecac in her 2 youngest daughter's breakfast juice so that they wouldn't feel well enough to go to Sunday School with their eldest sister that morning. Fantella gave Bethany the keys to the café to grab some change out of the cash register to take to church. Fantella went on her morning run, after putting the 2 youngest back to bed. She slithered under Benwick's car, Fantella knew exactly where the key holder was since her husband had sold and installed it, and drove off before Bethany left the house. She felt no remorse as the car hesitated on top of her own flesh and blood. In her second daughter's death, Fantella knew well of her middle daughter, Corrine's competitive nature and since the camp was only a 45-minute drive away from their house, she waited in the dark for her daughter to take her turn in the lake before dawn. Underwater, Fantella caught hold to her daughter's leg and pulled her under. She drove back home, showered and changed at the café and tossed the wet clothes in a garbage heap on her way back to the camp. As for Marianne's suffering, Fantella was slowly poisoning her with minute doses of Daffodil bulbs in her tea, soups, etc. Fantella Ferrars-Jones-Halifax-Harville-Dashwood was charged with 2 counts of capital murder, 3 counts of attempted murder, and a whole slew of other things. She served her lifetime sentence in a high security mental institution. And finally, yes, John Dashwood knew of his wife's doings and stupidly decided to turn the other cheek, or rather he would always go to Denton to visit his family for a few weeks. He was charged with aiding and abetting, duplicity, amongst other charges.

All this came out in a very cold and indifferent confession by Fantella Dashwood on the day after her surgery for her self-inflicted gunshot wound.

*****

Lucy Steele was eventually found, but could not be disbarred, because she was no lawyer, just some stupid chick that had a thing for male prisoners. She was sentenced to 30-days in a women's minimum-security prison. Who's to say what she preferred, if any, after that short stint.

Sarah Jarvis... Poor dear, Sarah! There's not much to tell. She managed to successfully hang herself in her jail cell, near the close of Wickham's trial. Enough said.

Wickham was thrown under the jail literally. Immediately upon his entrance into that society, he made many friends, but even more enemies. During year of his 6^th term, everyone was perplexed at his sudden disappearance. For days, investigations ranged from the prison warden to the guards to the lowliest cook, but no one had a clue to his whereabouts. However, after a few days, a rotting stench gave notice and the fake gold wedding band found around a bony finger gave evidence. No one shed a tear when it was discovered that the tunnel he had dug for 5 years had collapsed on him during his escape.

*****

On a lighter note: After years of courtship, Drs. Eleanor Dashwood and Edward Ferrars were married in a private ceremony in Dallas, where they set up private practice. As suspected, Frederick Wentworth and Anne Eliot were married almost immediately after meeting in Darcy's office by the Justice of the Peace in Austin. Doctor Frank Churchill and Nurse Jane Fairfax initially hid their tryst, since such a thing was frowned upon by Hospital Administration, but it got too hard to keep the lies in line, so they were married in the hospital cafeteria by the resident Priest. Emma and Jeremy Knightley lived and loved all their days.

Georgiana went to college and took the cat with her. Later, she married and lived happily ever after. No scandal would ever cloud her good name.

Kitty finally calmed down after a scandalous 'hanging from a chandelier' accident nearly took her life. She married the male nurse who gave her sponge baths. They remained in Paris.

Mary's 'spirituality' waned drastically. She married a lounge lizard, I mean, a nightclub singer. Their children played and sang horribly.

Lydia was happy with her lot in life. She was by no means stupid about the man she married. She was mindful enough not to cash in the life policy she took out on Wickham when he was sent to prison and happily collected a tidy sum for her troubles. Yet, she would remain a widow, because spending her money on men and other frivolous things, wasted into nothingness. By the time she was 50, Lydia became dependent on the goodness of her children.

Jane and Bingley... Do I need to go there? Of course, life was smooth and silky for them. They lived and loved in quiet and solitude. Well, that is to say, after the boys grew up and left home.

The Gardiners visited Pemberley often as they were on the most intimate terms with the Darcys.

The Weston's were also on very friendly terms with the Darcys. Stan and Mabel unofficially adopted the Darcy children as their grandchildren and were never happier.

Mr. and Mrs. Bennet lived... She was, of course, very happy that all of her daughters had married well. At least in her mind. She could ask for nothing better! He enjoyed the overwhelming acceptance and expansion of his brand of martial arts, Hapkate, and traveled the world over... without his wife; who never did get on an airplane.

After their wedding and subsequent honeymoon, Charlotte and the Colonel settled happily in Austin. After their twins (a boy and a girl) had grown to an age where they could be self sufficient, they set up shop together and called their business 'Just in Case' and did well in their games of espionage and danger. Their code names: his 007, hers Octopussy.

After coming out of the closet, so to speak... hee hee! Caroline could only babble about not ever wanting children and never ventured near her nephews again. Her well had run dry; Bingley refused to give her any more money. She lived off her friend Louisa's good fortune for a few weeks, until her friend threw her out on her penniless ear. Desperate, Caroline became the mistress of the first decently wealthy man she met. His name was Edward Lewis. He put her up in a nice condo, downtown San Antonio and visited until he married a former L.A. hooker. This one's for you, Dawn! However, she could not escape the newly resurrected Spanish Inquisition; Caroline was captured and handcuffed by Elizabeth and charged with heresy and witchcraft. On Leap Year Day, February 29, 2000, or the day the Lord is supposed to come again, she was burned at the stake. And all was right again in Dwiggiedom! Hee hee hee hee hee! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

*****

And in the tumultuous and tempestuous life of Elizabeth and Darcy, they could not have been more ecstatic. In between and around 3 children (2 boys and a girl), Elizabeth did take on cases of bounty, but not the dangerous ones; she was contented to locate lost family members without fee. Darcy was pleased that his wife 'trained' him in the 'arts' every day of his life. Whips and chains! Whips and chains!