This is a LIE! It is a snare and a delusion, a deception of the Blackened One. There can be NO truly Toastless part of our life on this plane. Toast is ubiquitous and permeates ALL aspects of our existence. From Toast come all good things, and all things in their time become Toast.
It is true, however, that not all things in life are themselves Toast. These things serve as a reminder of the Goodness of Toast, for even the heathen, who denies the Supremacy of Toast, may live in hope of redemption, so long as he admits in his heart that these things go better with some Toast:
KDHX is one of the
best radio stations anywhere. After a long hiatus (thanks to the RIAA), those with RealPlayer software can once again listen online. Just click on Ray D. O'Dude (in the lower right of the KDHX homepage). In addition to having some of the most interesting and eclectic music programming imaginable, KDHX is also home to the
KDHX Arts
Calendar , for which the Toast-obsessed administrator of the Exquisite Toaster website provides one of the voices, as well as audio
engineering services.
Performing Arts Reviews are another outstanding
feature of KDHX�s programming, and another one to which "Mister Toast" contributes his humble talents. The link above will take you to reviews of a wide range of performing arts events in the St. Louis area by a variety of reviewers, and you can also use this ARCHIVE of the deathless critical prose "Mister Toast" has
contributed to KDHX over the past few years.
is administered by Mister Toast's longtime friend Chuck Lavazzi, The_Doge Of South St. Louis. In addition to being the producer of both the Arts Calendar and the Performing Arts Reviews, Chuck serves as your genial host on KDHX's "Stage Left" program, a weekly mix of music, comedy, and the spoken word from stage and screen. He plays a mean harmonica, to boot.
Friends For Peace is a project of the American Friends Service Committee to display the faces of the pro-peace majority. Some of us remember when we were a tiny minority.
Dave's Midwest Banjo Tunes Page is the web presence of Dave Landreth. Mister Toast has enjoyed the extraordinary pleasure and privilege of performing with this outstanding musician, and more recently has studied clawhammer banjo under his tutelage. Mister Toast grooves on Dave's CD, "Chairs," which is highly recommended, and looks forward to the next one. This page features many informative links concerning "old-time" music for musicians and laymen, as well as links to many other, more outre sites that happen to strike "banjo boy's" fancy. Mister Toast cannot, however, personally vouch for the soap.
The Folk School of St. Louis, an acoustic music community, is where Dave teaches, and where many other fine teachers pass on the skills and traditions of old-time music.
The Upstart Crows are Sean Ruprecht-Belt (fiddle, guitar, mandolin, banjo-ukelele, vocals), Alan Whisman (dulcimer, banjo), Karen Whisman (dulcimer, fiddle), Flo Malone (dulcimer), and Yours Truly (guitar, banjo, vocals). We're an old-time band with an emphasis on mountain dulcimer. The CD, made in the band's pre-Toast days, is reported to be getting radio airplay in, of all places, New Zealand. In recent months, Sean and Mister Toast have begun developing an independent project as a duo. The duo repertoire includes some contemporary compositions and serves as a more liberal outlet for Sean's fiddling impulses and Mister Toast's burgeoning banjoid consciousness while reserving a prominent place for the old-time music that first brought the pair together as musicians.
How about some 
DISC GOLF? When a ball dreams, it dreams of being a disc.
Baseball is Our National Pastime. We watch it, we talk it, we play it before, during, and after the baseball season. This is the website of the ballclub with the most distingushed history in the Senior Circuit, with a grand total of fifteen National League Pennants and nine World Championships over a period of seventy-five years, all in one city. When baseball men are asked about baseball cities, they almost invariably report that St. Louis is home to the most knowledgeable and sophisticated fans in the game.
America�s Finest News Source. Peerless, take-no-prisoners satire.
Featuring weekly columns by Cecil Adams, World's Smartest Human, as well as frequent staff reports, message boards, and "Weird Earl."
On this award-winning website you�ll find daily updating editorial cartoons from all over the world, as well as links to
daily strips, cartoonists� websites, and more, hosted by Honolulu editorial cartoonist Daryl Cagle.
If you want to keep one step ahead of the mainstream in sociopolical insight, The Doonsbury Electronic Town Hall is the place to be.
If you want a different sort of sociopolitical insight, Get Your War On
Of course, a thing is considered "groundbreaking" for only as long as it takes for someone to satirize it. So Get Your Gore On
comprises some 240 dictionaries and other reference resources for languages from Abenaki to Zulu, including Basque, Igbo, Lakota, Nahuatl, Rasta, and Klingon.
are always
good for some amusement. Be sure to check out the
Alanis Morissette Lyric Generator.
Encyclopedia Mythica is an extraordinary reference site, comprising over 6,500 entries covering virtually anything you might ever want to know about almost any kind of mythology.
Here you'll find some Name Generators and related folderol from various places on the web, including the Brunching Shuttlecocks (see above).
Symbols.com is a compendium of signs, symbols, runes, ideograms, and so on from earliest times to the present day.
Scope Systems' "Anyday" page. Just give it a date and it will tell you what happened, who was born, who died, etc., in the history of Western Civ, with a few references here and there to other cultures.
Do you know what time it is? Don't take a chance. This is the US Naval Observatory time, and it's as close as you'll ever get to something exact and perfect in this frustratingly imprecise world.
Praise Bob! ***Superior Mutants!!*** Quit Your Job!! *** Slack Off!! *** Pull The Wool Over Your OWN Eyes!! *** Have Sex With A Real Live Girl!! ***Relax in the Safety of Your Own Delusions!! *** You'll PAY To Know What You REALLY Think!! *** Kill Bob!! *** Etc!!
NARF! It's the ACME LABS website! 
YES, Pinky!
I'll be updating this page, and the entire Exquisite Toaster website, from time to time.
In the meantime, why not have some TOAST?
Redeem yourself, heathen, with some Toast Readings. And for Pete's sake, go get yourself some Toast!
Oh, all right. Because absolutely nobody has asked, here is some information About Mister Toast
If you're as weird as all that, e-mail your slobbering dementia to [email protected]
people have visited this page. Some of them even did so on purpose.
