"There are no 'musts, have to's, or shoulds', only actions
and reactions that are based upon some sort of belief system."
There are five types of belief systems each initiating different
actions and reactions.
1. Positive Appropriate
2. Positive Inappropriate
3. Neutral
4. Negative Appropriate
5. Negative Inappropriate
Therapeutic Contravention:
i). People are entitled and have a right to their opinions and feelings.
ii). Once i). is thoroughly understood, even in negative inappropriate activating events, rather than depression, anger, absolutes, and self-damnation, one can choose to react in less extreme terms such as the event is 'inconvenient, somewhat frustrating, or unfortunate' by changing their belief system and reactions to the activating event or circumstance.
Ernest Holmes:
"Our future progress depends upon our ability to consciously co-operate with nature and its laws and consciously identify ourselves with the Spirit of Intelligence animating nature."
(I read a good article in Oct 1989 Science of Mind magazine called "Know Thyself" by Cliff Johnson in conversation with Jacob Needleman comparing Lower Self with True Self, ego with being, inner contemplative dimension with social action and outward doing, etc.). I call this the great "Alpha Ape versus Omega Man struggle."
"Some men see things the way they are and say why?
I dream of things that never were and say, why not?"
"Believe in the God who believes in you."
AFFAC - Autonomy For Freedom And Co-operation
AFO - Autonomy For Others
Autonomy = Self Government (I AM THAT I AM)
"Think of the hopes that lie before you
Not of the waste that lies behind,
think of the treasures you have gathered,
Not the ones you failed to find
think of the service you may render,
Not of serving self alone,
Think of the happiness of another,
And in this you'll find your own."
"When man finally discovers the secrets of the Universe,
he will finally understand the forces at work within himself."
Mark Twain:
"We do not deal much in facts when we are contemplating ourselves."
Robert Browning:
"A man's reach must exceed his grasp else what's a heaven for?"
DBH
"Kindness and humor before diplomacy and tact."
From Attitudes I gained in Florida:
"Growing through changes is the rightful experience of self-discovery, that's not to be classified or belittled, but to be acknowledged and understood simply as part of the process of character development necessary, before any meaningful inter-relationships progress. In addition to this wisdom, we all need to realize that we simply cannot 'find' giving, trusting, and loving, in a relationship. These co-operative, interacting qualities are left for us 'to make', and require both patience and time as we struggle in the arena of issues. Throughout our life we gotta face our rising fears with guts enough 'to make' that energy work to our benefit. Good struggle is the meaning of life. It is not winning or losing that counts in the final analysis - but to have fought well; and in your arena you gotta 'make' yourself a good, clean heart full of fighting energy 'to make' happiness, dignity, respect, and pride return to you later on. And so we surrender to live 'to make' every thought, feeling, word, expression, intention, and action 'count' as if this were the last day on earth for them. Be thankful for the angels at your side helping in the planning process, and together reaffirm: Faith - to take or make creative initiatives; Courage - to face problems and fears wisely with energy enough 'to make' it work for us; and Enthusiasm 'to make' everything that is accountable multiply in our struggle for freedom and the freedom of creative autonomy."
DBH
"Finally, when all's been said and done, one question remains in this day and age as criteria for my level of involvement: 'Is this the woman that I want my kids to spend their week-ends with?'"
Rollo May:
"Courage... is the foundation that underlies and gives reality to all other virtues and personal values. Without courage our love pales into mere dependency. Without courage our fidelity becomes conformism."
The Changeling Eagle:
An Indian legend tells about a brave who found an eagle's egg and put it into the nest of a prairie chicken. The eaglet hatched with the brood of chicks and grew up with them.
All his life, the changeling eagle - thinking he was a prairie chicken - did what the prairie chickens did.
He scratched in the dirt for seeds and insects to eat. He clucked and cackled. And he flew in a brief thrashing of wings and flurry of feathers no more than a few feet off the ground. After all, that's how prairie chickens were supposed to fly.
Years passed. And the changeling eagle grew very old. One day, he saw a magnificent bird far above him in the cloudless sky. Hanging with graceful majesty on the powerful wind currents, it soared with scarcely a beat of its strong golden wings.
"What a beautiful bird," said the changeling eagle to his neighbor. "What is it?"
"That's an eagle. The chief of birds," the neighbor clucked. "But don't give it a second thought. You could never be like him."
So the changeling eagle never gave it another thought. And it died thinking it was a prairie chicken.
Ancient Chinese Proverb:
Better to light one candle than to curse the darkness.
The Land of the Fools:
Once upon a time there was a man who strayed from his own country into a world known as the land of the fools. He soon saw a number of people fleeing in terror from a field where they had been trying to reap wheat.
"There's a monster in the field," they told him.
He looked and saw that it was a watermelon. He offered to kill the monster for them. When he had cut the watermelon from its stock, he cut out a slice and began to eat it. The people became more terrified of him than they had been of the watermelon. They drove him away with pitchforks saying, "He will kill us next unless we get rid of him."
It so happened that another person, a woman, also strayed into the land of the fools, and the same thing began to happen. Instead of offering to help them with the monster, she agreed that it must be dangerous. She tiptoed away from the monster and thus gained their confidence. She spent a long time in their village and in their homes until she could teach them the basic facts of melons and even to cultivate them themselves.
Robert Louis Stevenson:
That man, that woman is a success...
Who never lacked appreciation of earth's
beauty
or failed to express it;
Who looked for the best in others
and gave the best they had.
Viktor Frankl:
Everyone has his own specific vocation or mission in life; everyone must carry out a concrete assignment that demands fulfillment. Therein he cannot be replaced, not can his life be repeated. Thus, everyone's task is as unique as his specific opportunity to implement it.
John Henry Newman:
God has created me to do Him
some definite service;
He has committed some work to me
which He has not committed to another.
I have my mission...
I am a link in a chain,
a bond of connection between persons.
A. Activating event.
B. Belief system about it.
C. Choice of reaction.
