| i'm just glad that i've got you (18 sept 02) If movie night drew in its last breath of air tonight and died, I don't really care. Yes, it's a fun time when a handful of my friends come over for a movie and such, but it's starting to get old and boring. That and with the fall TV season upon us, mom wants her TV back, so I don't mind. That and yeah they don't mean it, but when your good friend(s) make cracks at you, and you know they don't mean it, it still hurts. Yeah, I haven't grown out of that phase yet. Feel bad for Gianni. He has alot going on for him right now, and I know the position he is in. I've been there, I'm there right now, and I'm just trying to show him my perspective. The boy misses his girl who, like my Roo, is away at college. Yeah I have some advantages where I can drive and see her a bit more often, he doesn't. He's stuck with the thoughts of breaking up so he won't regret these days while he waited on his first and only girlfriend to come home from school. Me, yes I am miserable, I'll be flat out about it. But is it because I miss having someone, no. Is it because I just want to take some girl, pull her into a corner and make out with her just to supress some kind of urge? Of course not. I'm miserable because I miss what means most to be, my beloved Jennyroo. Over the last 18 years, I've had my share of girls, but I really don't want that anymore. I have Jen and she has everything I've ever wanted. Why leave that for next to nothing? Why leave it for nothing at all? Exactly, I'm not. For once, everything is fine and dandy in Rusty Land, and I'm not about to let it get out of whack. It's as if all the planets in the universe have alligned, and everything, for once, is fine. I wouldn't be surprised if Jen is the last girl I'm with. Four months in to my longest relationship [ever, yes, ever!] everything's exactly how it is supposed to be. I keep on wondering what it would take to get her to move home and go to school here or something, but she's so far ahead with her education that'd be dumb of her to do something like that right about now. And though it has been as long as it has been, I still pinch myself often at night, wondering how I got to be this lucky. Lucky enough to just look in Jen's eyes, pull my 'muppet-face' out and see her do it back like a mirror, or just laugh and crack the hugest grin from ear to ear. I take it back. I know Jen is the last girl I'm going to be with. And that is that. |