Starting Over Again
So it didn't work out as planned .. after one month of reunion, Faith and I have split.
Reason you ask? Well, to be honest it's pretty much the distance again, and that she feels she's not the right type of girl for me .. her not showing as much affection, not keeping her happy, I might like someone else blah blah blah blah blah. This all occured sometime after midnight, I was pretty down. Our communication has ceased for the moment; she asked me if she should take me off her buddy list, I said whatever. She doesn't want us to not talk again for another five months, but like her, rather than cuddle, I take space. I'm sorry, but it's hard to talk to her now for a bit. With time, wounds will heal and I might then feel better.
And then, I go to bed. I fall asleep as quick as I wake up. I come upstairs to see mom has breakfast from McDonald's for me; Pancakes and Sausage. I forget about it all, when the third thing mom says is:
"So, did you have a nice time with Faith on Tuesday? When is she coming down here?"
Mouth : Insert Foot Here.
She felt bad, Russ felt bad as well, telling me to take the night off and be with myself. That's what I'm doing.
After going to work, being miserbale in the crowd of people and a down credit card network, and might I add the 15 minute pity party and teary lunch, I'm home now.
For supper, mom got me a frozen pizza I made myself, and baked me cookies, which were "baked with love" mom's note said. Her and Russ went out this evening to dinner, a club and kitchen curtain shopping (in some order). I've decided to rent American Pie on DVD. Maybe that will cheer me up or something ...
So tonight is like one of the first nights after Faith and I parted in January; I'm home alone, this time with rain falling rather than snow, movies, and a pizza. All I feel is loneliness and empty inside; and the taste of a love-laced chocolate chip cookie :(
So where do I go from here? Well, of all the women in the world, I carry an interest in two. The first one is a bit confused right now on the concepts of dating and mating, but the second I've carried a strong affection for for the longest time and just never let it out. A fellow co-worker of mine who feels that the two of us share a special common bond type thing. She either A) Doesn't know I really do feel this way or B) Does know how I really feel and wishes to ignore it. Once more of 7_Girls becomes posted, you might know who she is ...
But for now, I head to the couch to try and cheer up a bit.