butterfly with cyanide eyes and a metal heart

witness little girls in green drawing room dresses
with broken crowns (and jester costumes with
red ribbons)
blowing bubbles that are so soon broken
tip-toeing through the
daisy fields
while the world sings maybes, and days since she has ceased to turn
and yes, i believe
that marbles can be bathbeads
if they learn how to
dream

little girls in lamenated picture books
suffering black dresses
and dirty looks
waiting for the sky to unfold
and blanket them and
they expect the world to watch them suffocate
in
bad relationships and grains of salt

when she tries to dance like
sun rays
the clouds wrap them selves around her
(much like glue-soaked cotton)
when she tries to sing like the raindrops
the earth blazes with dry
white heat
and when she tried to
bloom back into love
all her petals were torn away

some enchanted hand murmuring
"loves me, love me not"
who never knew her
(maybe never even meant to hurt her)

and her little
silver locket
is the best story teller you'll ever meet
and her little
gold heart
is the best secret keeper that you'll never see

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can't do anything but sit
leaning against the door, and cry
and scream "i hate you"s
and wonder why

aching all over, in her mind
in her stomach, in her heart
reading old I.O.U.s that were sealed with
memories and the scent of
vanilla and cheese pizza
surrounded by the historic dust
of dark basements

and now she's playing basketball
with used kleenex and a garbage bin
and
crying into the sand
that watched her grow up
and could bury the world
and carry the world
dark and doleful eyes
brought to life in her
misery

so she swallows
and chokes down her grief
goes to the window and closes her eyes
the grey clouds fade back into mystery
and the sun graces her heart
with hands that never meant to hurt her

she
breathes again
as she waits for tomorrow


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