Image courtesy ArtToday.com

Taking Your Relationship Off Line

(or How to Meet Someone Safely for the First Time)

So, you've taken a collar, and you and your Master have become very close. You spend almost every evening together on line. You've tried very hard to be just the kind of slave He wants you to be, to be as pleasing as you possibly can. However, for many couples there comes a time when just being together on-line isn't enough. The two of you want more.

Now, here is where the two of you both need to be very careful. Taking an on-line relationship off line is a serious business, and must be done very carefully. There are two very essential things that must be taken into consideration here: honesty and safety.

There is a large fantasy element that goes along with on-line Gor. It's all very romantic to be sitting in a paga den surrounded by beautiful kajirae and handsome Masters. However, the very nature of this environment makes it all too easy to get so wrapped up in the fantasy that you embroider your own image. That Master who describes Himself as being 6 foot tall, blonde, and built like a brick wall, may in fact be short, fat, and bald. That slave who depicts herself as petite with full pouting breasts and raven hair that tickles her bottom may be fat and have short mousy brown hair. Or she may be flat as a pancake with pimples. Not to mention the fact that either party may be married or 14 years old.

Now, it's perfectly fine to embellish your attributes a little. Goodness knows, this one is 41 years old. She isn't as thin as she used to be, and gravity has begun to take its toll on her figure. She couldn't see the nose in front of her face without her glasses. But she DOES have very long golden hair, and she DOES have a tendency to stick her tongue out at certain times, so she tends to play up these things. If there does come a time when she becomes close enough to a Master that they are considering moving their relationship off line, she makes it a point to speak to him about her weaknesses, as well as her strengths.

There are a few red flags that may come up when two people begin to discuss taking their relationship to a deeper level. Some of these include:

1. A web-based e-mail address. This is one of those addresses that can be accessed from any computer, including the one at work that a person isn't supposed to use for personal pleasure. These might include any number of addresses that end in yahoo.com, hotmail.com, usa.com, mailcity.com, juno.com, bigfoot.com, mailexcite.com, wowmail.com, nightmail.com, rocketmail.com, as well as others.

Now, a person may have a perfectly valid reason for using such an address. this one is cautious about giving out her personal private e-mail address, unless she knows the other person very well, so she has a yahoo box that she uses for some correspondence. However, after months of chatting with a person, he/she should trust you enough to give you his/her personal e-mail address. If not, then you should start to wonder why.

Again, the concern should come not from the fact that a person has a we-based e-mail address, but instead if the person refuses to give you his personal e-mail. If this happens, be sure you know why and be sure that the explanation is valid and reasonable.

2. The person refuses to send a picture of Himself. Now, this is not always a red flag, unless the person also refuses a phone chat. Some people just don't have a picture scanned. However, in this day and age this is something that is easily remedied. There are public libraries or copy shops that will scan a picture for a small fee. Or, the person can send you a hard copy of the picture via snail mail. Don't buy the excuse, "I don't have a camera." This is easily solved by going to the store and buying a cheap, disposable camera.

Refusal to send a picture prior to a meeting could mean a number of things. It could mean that this is a case of "gender switching." It could mean that the person has lied about his appearance. It could also mean that he/she is just shy. Most people think they have one "fatal flaw" that will ruin their chances of being considered attractive.

However, even if the person DOES send you a picture, this is not a guarantee of total honesty. arani knows of one Master whose slave sent Him a picture of a beautiful young woman. He found out later that the picture she sent was of someone else, and that she looked entirely different. Look over the picture you receive very carefully, and if in doubt don't feel shy about asking for a second one.

3. The person is hesitant about giving out a phone number. Now, reluctance to give out a phone number right away is not always an indicator of problems. this one is a single woman living alone in a small town; she refuses to give out her phone number to most people, even close friends, for safety reasons. However, after a reasonable amount of time, if the person still won't give you a phone number, then you should start to ask why. And, if you do get a phone number, call at different times of the day and see who answers the phone.

Now, let's say that you have a picture of that special person, and you've talked to Him on the phone. There are a couple of things to bear in mind, especially when considering a picture. Any picture will not give you a complete idea of what a person looks like. It shows what he/she is like at the particular second that the camera went off. It won't show you the gestures, facial expressions, and mannerisms that show His personality. It won't show you all the annoying little habits that a person can have......the nail-biting, flatulation, belching, nose-picking, leaving the toilet seat up, strewing dirty clothes around the house, and all of those things that can only be seen after spending some time with a person. Also, bear in mind that if a person sends you a "glamour" shot, that may or may not be what the person actually looks like without all of the glitz.

These, and other issues, should be discussed thoroughly and frankly, and at length, before any meeting is planned. If you are satisfied that the person is who He says He is, and that He is just as attractive on the phone and in a picture as He is in a chat room, then the next thing to consider is the safety factor. Oh, you say, I trust Him. He would never hurt me. Well, many girls have thought the same thing. One slave this girl met took a train across the country only to find no one waiting for her at the other end. One girl was beaten severely in a hotel room. Another girl ended up in a steel drum cut up in little pieces. Safety is something that should always be considered before planning any meeting.

© arani_CsA, 9/16/2000

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