Drawing by A.L. Guptill,
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Christianity and BDSM/Gor

A number of times, arani has mentioned that she met her Master through a Christian BDSM message board. Whenever arani speaks of this, there are those who are surprised, saying that they thought the two philosophies would be mutually exclusive. Actually, arani continues to be amazed at how well they fit together. A friend asked arani to write about her thoughts on this. she will state, first of all, that they are her opinions, and that she doesn't expect everyone to agree with her.

There is a small but active community of people on the net who espouse both Christianity and the BDSM lifestyle. It has been arani’s experience that most of these people do not practice complete slavery, but rather what they term “Domestic Discipline.” However, arani has also come across a community of Christian Goreans, who are strong advocates of each philosophy. It should be noted here that there are disagreements between these people as to the finer points of the lifestyle, just as there are many disputes on just what it means to be Gorean. arani has observed that this can be found in any aspect of life; no one agrees all the time. If they did, the world would be an awfully boring place.

There are two passages in the Bible that arani uses as primary supports for her position regarding Christianity and BDSM. (There are others, but these are arani’s favorites.) The first of these is found way back in Genesis, and occurs when God was cursing Adam and Eve after they had sinned. To Eve, God said, “I will greatly multiply your pain in childbearing; in pain you shall bring forth children, yet your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.” (Genesis 3: 16, RSV)

Now, look at the last part of that passage. “Yet your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.” There is more than one interpretation for this passage, just as there is more than one interpretation for almost every passage in Scripture. Another translation of this same passage says, “I will increase your trouble in pregnancy and your pain in giving birth. In spite of this, you will still have desire for your husband, yet you will be subject to him." (Today’s English Version) One commentary (Jamieson, Fausset, Brown) states that “From being the help meet of man and the partner of his affections, her condition would henceforth be that of humble subjection.” Another commentary (Matthew Henry Complete) says, “She is here put into a state of subjection. The whole sex, which by creation was equal with man, is, for sin, made inferior, and forbidden to usurp authority.”

Now, we come to the second Scriptural passage that arani finds supportive of her viewpoint. Ephesians 5: 22-29 says, “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church.” (King James Version) In John Wesley’s Explanatory Notes on the Bible, he says of this: “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands - Unless where God forbids. Otherwise, in all indifferent things, the will of the husband is a law to the wife. As unto the Lord - The obedience a wife pays to her husband is at the same time paid to Christ himself; he being head of the wife, as Christ is head of the church.”

arani will here use an illustration from her own life. she has a very dear friend, whom she grew up with. This friend and her husband belong to a very strict fundamentalist pentecostal Protestant denomination. She consults her husband in all things; what to cook for dinner, what to wear, how to dress her hair, whether she can go out to lunch with a friend, whether she can buy new shoes for the children. And she does so because she believes that is what the Bible commands her to do. If arani would speak to her of slavery, she would undoubtedly be shocked and offended. However, by some standards, she is very much a slave. And, her husband (and her church) would most surely find a way to punish her if she “transgressed” in some way.

This last passage talks about how women should be subject to their husbands “in every thing,” just as Christians are subject to Christ in every thing. While many Christian BDSMers would disagree, arani sees this as referring to the type of total obedience found in slavery. God allows His followers no limits in their service to Him; we can’t go to Him and say, “Well, God, these commandments are all very nice, but I just can’t see that thing about not stealing. I’ll believe in you, but I won’t obey you there.” Nope, no negotiations with God. Now, there is forgiveness, of course, but that doesn’t mean we go around disobeying God because we know He’ll forgive us when we repent. (Okay, a very simplistic analogy, but it applies.)

When most people read this passage, they look at the first part that speaks to women and either ignore or brush over the second part that speaks to the men. Men are to love their wives, to nourish them and cherish them, and teach them God’s ways. Hey, doesn’t that sound a little like a Master? What is it that our Masters do (or should do)? Of course they expect obedience, as is their due. But, a good Master will also cherish His property, He will see to her safety and wish to see her improve – not only as a slave, but as a person. He will instruct her, where He sees fit, in how better to serve Him. He will help her come to an acceptance of her condition, so that she may be more pleasing to Him. It’s just a matter of making His property all the more valuable.

Now, one can say, “Wait a minute. Isn’t Paul talking about wives here?” And, this would be the argument of most Christians. In John Gill’s Exposition of the Bible, he states, “This is an instance, explaining the above general rule; which subjection lies in honour and reverence, (Ephesians 5:33) , and in obedience; they should think well of their husbands, speak becomingly to them, and respectfully of them; the wife should take care of the family, and family affairs, according to the husband's will; should imitate him in what is good, and bear with that which is not so agreeable; she should not curiously inquire into his business, but leave the management of it to him; she should help and assist in caring and providing for the family; and should abide with him in prosperity and adversity, and do nothing without his will and consent: and this subjection is only to her husband; not to any other man, nor to her children, nor to her servants, or any brought into her house; and this consideration should render the subjection more easy, voluntary, and cheerful: and which is but reasonable that it should be; as may be gathered from the time, matter, and end of the woman's creation, she was made after him, out of him, and for him; and from her fall, and being first in the transgression; and from her being the weaker and inferior sex; and from the profitableness and comeliness of it; and the credit of religion requires it, that so the word of God be not blasphemed.”

Doesn’t this sound like a description of a Free Companion, rather than of a slave? Well, yes it does. When arani was a Free Woman, she helped to run her FC’s on-line tavern in His absence, she trained His slaves, and any number of things. Her purpose was to be a help to Him, to walk to His side and yet one step behind, to make His life easier in many different ways.

And yet, is a Free Companionship a marriage? Some would liken it to one, but others would disagree. arani prefers to interpret the passage, as do many others, to mean any kind of bonded relationship formed in mutual agreement between a man and a woman. This includes consensual slavery. The difference here is that, in a BDSM relationship, whether it be between a Dominant and a submissive or a Master and a slave, the Dominant partner has the right to punish any perceived digressions from the agreement. And, while a vanilla wife may reserve the right to discuss decisions and rules made by her husband, the sub/slave must accept these decisions as a law akin to that of God.

One stipulation that is made over and over again, in the Bible, is that this submission of the wife is to be within the context of the laws of God. arani has said more than once that the laws of her God come before the laws of her Master. However, when arani took His collar, she had talked enough with Him that she felt confident He would never order her to do such a thing. If arani has concerns about His commands, as they relate to the words of God, He allows her to discuss her concerns with Him. He may or may not alter His command, but she is grateful that He does allow her this. There have been those who have said arani cannot be fully owned in the Gorean sense because of this, and those people are certainly entitled to their own opinions. arani knows in her heart that she is fully owned and controlled by a very wonderful Man, who will protect her and guide her within the boundaries set by God. she hopes to always serve Him in such a way that will be pleasing both to Him and to God.

In summary, Christianity and BDSM/Gor are not necessarily mutually exclusive concepts. For some people, they can work well together, and provide meaning to their lives. As with anything, there will be differences even in the ways that the two philosophies are intermingled, but again, we are all individuals and must do as our individual consciences dictate. arani hopes her words have been informative and helpful; she would be happy to discuss these views further, if someone would like to contact her privately at [email protected]

© arani_CsA, 2/13/2003

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