(Preliminary version to be updated soon)
|
|
Don't Panic!
POSSIBLE SPOILERS WARNING.
If
you haven't read the Hitch hiker's guide to the galaxy,
the
following information might spoil some subplots.
POSSIBLE SPOILERS
POSSIBLE
SPOILERS: Last sign
.
.
.
Marvin is a maniacally depressed
robot/android character created by the late Douglas Adams in his Hitch
Hicker's Guide to the Galaxy. This page is a little tribute to this character,
that in a sense represents the danger of being too conscious and intelligent.
The robot is usually depressed, can foresee most events, almost nothing
surprises it, and it finds no pleasure or purpose in life. It is indeed
extremely intelligent, "having solved all the major mathematical, physical,
chemical, biological, sociological, philosophical, etymological, meteorological
and psychological problems of the Universe except his own, three times
over". It is extremely bored too, feeling that "Nothing is worth getting
involved in". At times it tries to escape boredom by "analysing the molecular
components of the door, and of the humanoids' brain cells". It can easily
measure "the level of hydrogen emissions in the surrounding cubic
parsec of space and then shut down again in boredom".
Actually, despite its incredible
intelligence, the robot is given trivial tasks such as opening doors and
parking cars. The most maddening episode is when its organic masters time-travel
millions of years in the future, and forget Marvin outside the time-machine.
When the time-machine arrives at the final time, its organic masters find
out Marvin has also arrived into this remote future, but taking the slow
way. Marvin has spent millions of years working as a parker, waiting for
the time machine to rematerialize. Clearly the robot's mood has not improved.
The poor machine goes through a lot of silly errands set up from organic
life forms, and reaches a point where, due to time-traveling, it is 37
times older than the universe itself. But an eternity of pain is going
to end, as Marvin finally meets a old friend and sees the Creator's final
message to His creation. After seeing the message the robot finally feels
"good about it", and finds peace, as "the lights go out in his eyes for
absolutely the very last time ever".
Undoubtly there is a touch of fun in Marvin's figure, and probably Douglas Adams introduced this character with the partial intent of amusing his readers. Anyway, the author reaches the (certainly intentional) interesting result of amusing and at the same time inducing sadness in his public, as one cannot avoid noticing a substantial dramatic aspect in Marvin's figure, even after filtering out all its exorcizing paranoia and depression cliches.
Marvin has appeared not only as a literary character in the five book series of the Hitch Hiker's Guide of the Galaxy (1980-1992): The maniacally depressed robot was also in the Radio Series (1978-80), in the BBC TV series (1981) and in the comic book rendition (1993-1995). This page is devoted to the book-series Marvin.
The term "android" is used, in Marvin's case, in its broadest meaning. If one sticks to the standard that an android is a human looking robot, performing human like functions (possibly at an increased level), Marvin is indeed an android, even if it does not look too human apart from the rough body structure and his language. It is a metallic robot, built with no organic-like material. The more general "robot" term is used sometimes.
I will try to give a feeling for Marvin by resorting to quotes from the first four volumes of Douglas Adams' trilogy in five parts. However, if you are really interested in the character, I suggest you read the complete five-books series, which contains many other interesting ideas.
Don't Panic!
From:
The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy, book 1.
|
|
I'll send the robot down to get them and
bring them up here. Hey Marvin!''
In the corner, the robot's head
swung up sharply, but then wobbled about imperceptibly.
It pulled itself up to its feet as if
it was about five pounds heavier that it actually was, and made what an
outside observer would have thought was a heroic effort to cross the room.
It stopped in front of Trillian and seemed to stare
through her left shoulder.
''I think you ought to know I'm feeling
very depressed,'' it said.
Its voice was low and hopeless. ''Oh God,''
muttered Zaphod and slumped into a seat.
''Well,'' said Trillian in a bright
compassionate tone, ''here's something to occupy you and keep
your mind off things.''
''It won't work,'' droned Marvin, ''I
have an exceptionally large mind.'' ''Marvin!'' warned
Trillian.
''Alright,'' said Marvin, ''what do you
want me to do?'' ''Go down to number two entry bay and bring the two aliens
up here under surveillance.''
With a microsecond pause, and a finely
calculated micromodulation of pitch and timbre - nothing you could
actually take offence at - Marvin managed to convey his utter contempt
and horror of all things human. ''Just that?'' he said.
''Yes,'' said Trillian firmly. ''I won't
enjoy it,'' said Marvin.
Zaphod leaped out of his seat. ''She's
not asking you to enjoy it,'' he shouted, ''just do it, will you?''
''Alright,'' said Marvin like the tolling
of a great cracked bell, ''I'll do it.''
''Good ...'' snapped Zaphod, ''great ...
thank you ...''
Marvin turned and lifted his flat-topped
triangular red eyes up towards him. ''I'm not getting you down
at all am I?'' he said pathetically.
''No no Marvin,'' lilted Trillian, ''that's
just fine, really ...''
''I wouldn't like to think that I was
getting you down.''
''No, don't worry about that,'' the lilt
continued, ''you just act as comes naturally and everything will be just
fine.''
''You're sure you don't mind?'' probed
Marvin.
''No no Marvin,'' lilted Trillian, ''that's
just fine, really ... just part of life.''
''Marvin flashed him an electronic look.
''Life,'' said Marvin, ''don't talk to me about life.''
[....]
As the door closed behind them it became
apparent that it did indeed have a satisfied sigh-like quality to it.
''Hummmmmmmyummmmmmm ah!'' it said.
Marvin regarded it with cold loathing
whilst his logic circuits chattered with disgust and tinkered with
the concept of directing physical violence against it Further circuits
cut in saying, Why bother? What's the point? Nothing
is worth getting involved in. Further circuits amused themselves
by analysing the molecular components of the door, and
of the humanoids' brain cells. For a quick encore they measured the level
of hydrogen emissions in the surrounding cubic parsec
of space and then shut down again in boredom. A spasm of despair
shook the robot's body as he turned.
''Come on,'' he droned, ''I've been ordered
to take you down to the bridge. Here I am, brain the size of
a planet and they ask me to take you down to the bridge. Call that job
satisfaction? 'Cos I don't.''
|
|
''But that sunset! I've never seen anything
like it in my wildest dreams ... the two suns!
It was like mountains of fire boiling into space.''
''I've seen it,'' said Marvin. ''It's
rubbish.''
''We only ever had the one sun at
home,'' persevered Arthur, ''I came from a planet called Earth you know.''
''I know,'' said Marvin, ''you keep going
on about it. It sounds awful.''
''Ah no, it was a beautiful place.''
''Did it have oceans?''
''Oh yes,'' said Arthur with a sigh,
''great wide rolling blue oceans ...''
''Can't bear oceans,'' said Marvin.[...]
Arthur couldn't bear any more.
''I think I'll just take another walk,''
he said.
''Don't blame you,'' said Marvin and counted
five hundred and ninety-seven thousand million sheep before falling asleep
again a second later.
Back to top
|
|
Ford stayed, and went to examine the Blagulon
ship. As he walked, he nearly tripped over an inert steel figure
lying face down in the cold dust.
''Marvin!'' [...] ''Why,'' said Ford squatting
down beside him and shivering, ''are you lying face down in the dust?''
''It's a very effective way of being
wretched,'' said Marvin.
''Don't pretend you want to talk to me,
I know you hate me.''
''No I don't.''
''Yes you do, everybody does. It's
part of the shape of the Universe. I only have to talk to somebody
and they begin to hate me. Even robots hate me. If you just ignore me I
expect I shall probably go away.''
Back to top
|
|
''That ship hated me,''
he said dejectedly, indicating the policecraft.[...]
''It hated me because I talked to it.''
''You talked to it?'' exclaimed Ford.
''What do you mean you talked to it?''
''Simple. I got very bored and depressed,
so I went and plugged myself in to its external computer
feed. I talked to the computer at great length and explained my view of
the Universe to it,'' said Marvin.
''And what happened?'' pressed Ford.
''It committed suicide,'' said Marvin
and stalked off back to the Heart of Gold.
From:
The Restaurant at the End of the Universe (The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the
Galaxy, book 2).
|
|
''Hey ... Marvin!'' he said, ''Marvin!
How did you get here?''
Marvin was forced to say something which
came very hard to him. ''I don't know,'' he said.
''But ...''
''One moment I was sitting in your ship
feeling very depressed, and the next moment I was standing here feeling
utterly miserable. An Improbability Field I expect.''
Back to top
|
|
''The Paranoid Android! I left him moping
about on Frogstar B.''
''When was this?''
''Well, er, five hundred and seventy-six
thousand million years ago I suppose,'' said Zaphod [...]
''Hey, Marvin, is that you?'' said Zaphod
into the phone, ''How you doing, kid?'' [...]
''`Reverse primary thrust, Marvin,' that's
what they say to me, `open airlock number three, Marvin. Marvin, can you
pick up that piece of paper?' Can I pick up that piece of paper!
Here I am, brain the size of a planet and they ask me to... But I'm quite
used to being humiliated,'' droned Marvin, ''I can even go
and stick my head in a bucket of water if you like. Would you like me to
go and stick my head in a bucket of water? I've got one
ready. Wait a minute.''
''Er, hey, Marvin ...'' interrupted Zaphod,
but it was too late. Sad little clunks and gurgles came
up the line.
Back to top
|
|
Trillian patted him
in a way that he disliked intensely, ''hanging around waiting for us all
this time.''
''Five hundred and
seventy-six thousand million, three thousand five hundred and seventy-nine
years,'' said Marvin, ''I counted them.'' [... ] ''The first ten million
years were the worst, 'and the second ten million years, they were the
worst too. The third million years I didn't enjoy at all. After that I
went into a bit of decline.'' He paused just long enough to make them feel
they ought to say something, and then interrupted. ''It's the people you
meet in this job that really get you down,'' he said and paused again.
Trillian cleared
her throat. ''Is that ...''
''The best conversation
I had was over forty million years ago,'' continued Marvin.
''And that was with a coffee machine.''
Back to top
|
|
''Come
on over here,'' said Zaphod, ''We've got a job for you.''
Marvin trudged towards
them. ''I won't enjoy it,'' he said.
''Yes you will,''
enthused Zaphod, ''there's a whole new life stretching out
ahead of you.''
''Oh, not another
one,'' groaned Marvin.
From:
Life, the Universe, and Everything (The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy,
book 3).
|
|
Apart from anything
else, the mere coordination of an entire
planet's military strategy was taking up only a tiny part of its formidable
mind, and the rest of it had become extremely bored. Having solved all
the major mathematical, physical, chemical, biological, sociological, philosophical,
etymological, meteorological and psychological problems of the Universe
except his own, three times over, he was severely stuck for something to
do, and had taken up composing short dolorous ditties of no tone, or indeed
tune. The latest one was a lullaby.
''Now the world
has gone to bed,'' Marvin droned,
''Darkness won't
engulf my head,
''I can see by infra-red,
''How I hate the
night.''
He paused to gather
the artistic and emotional strength to tackle the next verse.
''Now
I lay me down to sleep,
''Try to count electric
sheep,
''Sweet dream wishes
you can keep,
''How I hate the
night.''
Back to top
|
|
''Maybe,'' said Marvin
with unexpected authority in his lugubrious voice, ''it would be better
if you monitored them from here. That young girl,'' he added unexpectedly,
''is one of the least benightedly unintelligent life forms it has been
my profound lack of pleasure not to be able to avoid meeting.''
Back to top
|
|
''The supernova bomb?''
said Marvin. ''It's a very, very small
bomb.''
''Yeah?''
''That would destroy
the Universe in toto,'' added Marvin. ''Good idea, if
you ask me. They won't get it to work, though.''
''Why not, if it's
so brilliant?''
''It's brilliant,''
said Marvin, ''they're not.
From:
So Long, and Thanks for all the Fish (The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy,
book 4).
|
|
''So much time,''
it groaned, ''oh so much time. And pain as well, so much of that,
and so much time to suffer it in too. One or the other on its own I could
probably manage. It's the two together that really get me down. Oh hello,
you again.''
''Marvin?'' said
Arthur sharply, crouching down beside it. ''Is that you?'' [...]
''What is it?''
whispered Fenchurch in alarm, crouching behind Arthur, and grasping on
to his arm. ''He's sort of an old friend,'' said Arthur. ''I ...''
''Friend!'' croaked
the robot pathetically. The word died away in a kind of crackle and flakes
of rust fell out of its mouth. ''You'll have to excuse me while I try and
remember what the word means. My memory banks are
not what they were you know, and any word which falls into disuse for a
few zillion years has to get shifted down into auxiliary memory
back-up. Ah, here it comes.''
The robot's battered
head snapped up a bit as if in thought. ''Hmm,'' he said, ''what a curious
concept.'' He thought a little longer. ''No,'' he said at last, ''don't
think I ever came across one of those. Sorry, can't help you there.''
He scraped a knee
along pathetically in the dust, an then tried to twist himself up on his
misshapen elbows.
''Is there any last
service you would like me to perform for you perhaps?'' he asked in a kind
of hollow rattle. ''A piece of paper that perhaps you would like me to
pick up for you? Or maybe you would like me,'' he continued,
''to open a door?''
|
|
''Arthur,'' hissed
Fenchurch in his ear sharply, ''you never told me of this. What have you
done to this poor creature?''
''Nothing,'' insisted
Arthur sadly, ''he's always like this ...''
''Ha!'' snapped
Marvin. ''Ha!'' he repeated. ''What do you know of always? You say
`always' to me, who, because of the silly little errands your organic lifeforms
keep on sending me through time on, am now
thirty-seven times older than the Universe itself? Pick your words
with a little more care,'' he coughed, ''and tact.''
Back to top
|
|
Arthur flipped through
a little rack of devotional tracts on the counter, little meditations
on the meaning of the Message. ''Ready?'' he said to Fenchurch, who nodded.
They heaved up Marvin between them. [...]
They gazed at God's Final Message in wonderment,
and were slowly and ineffably filled with a great
sense of peace, and of final and complete understanding.[...] They had
been staring at it for fully ten minutes before they
became aware that Marvin, hanging between their shoulders, was in difficulties.
The robot, who could no longer lift his head, had not
read the message. They lifted his head, but he complained that
his vision circuits had almost gone. They found a coin and helped him to
the telescope. He complained and insulted them, but they
helped him look at each individual letter in turn.
Spoilers space
.
.
.
Spoilers space
.
.
.
The first letter was a ''w'', the
second an ''e''. Then there was a gap. An ''a'' followed,
then a ''p'', an ''o'' and an ''l''.
Marvin paused for a rest.
After a few moments they resumed and let
him see the ''o'', the ''g'', the ''i'', the ''s''
and the ''e''. The next two words were ''for'' and ''the''. The last one
was a long one, and Marvin needed another rest before he could tackle
it. It started with an ''i'', then ''n'' then a ''c''. Next came an ''o''
and an ''n'', followed by a ''v'', an ''e'', another ''n'' and an ''i''.
After a final pause, Marvin gathered his strength for the
last stretch.
He read the ''e'', the ''n'', the ''c''
and at last the final ''e'', and staggered back into their arms.
|
|
He read the ''e'', the ''n'', the ''c'' and at last the final ''e'', and staggered back into their arms.
''I think,'' he murmured at last, from deep within his corroding rattling thorax, ''I feel good about it.''
The lights went out in his eyes for absolutely
the very last time ever.
Luckily, there was a stall nearby where
you could rent scooters from guys with green wings.
|
|
Douglas Adams official web site, the official web site devoted to Marvin's Creator
BBC's Marvin's page: The BBC's page on the Hitch hiker's guide to the Galaxy, including Marvin.
Floor 42: From the celebrated answer to the fundamental problem of life, the universe and everything, a web site devoted to Douglas Adams works.
Marvin the paranoid android is a web site with songs, quotes and some facts about Marvin's different versions.
Alan and Stacey's original Marvin page contains quotes and music as well.
Marvin's depressing corner of the universe is yet another page on Marvin, with some original ideas.
There are hundreds of links related to Douglas Adams on the web, and
it is impossible to do justice to all of them. [more links coming soon]
|
|