I watch and wait

For the love that will never appear.

Still I reach out for companionship

But I am pushed aside

Scorned for reasons I cannot fathom.

Alone I stand

In the shadows forever alone.

Friendless I refuse the pity in their eyes

I clutch like a jealous lover my pride.

Like hungry wolves

They attack me.

Begging for my reaction of anger

Which rises hotly within me.

I am not afraid of them

Yet I fight them not.

I clutch my tatterred dreams still

For the Love and Friendship I desire.

So I sit and wait

For a wish that won't come true.

I often wonder

If it's me or them who has no concept of reality.

Yet, there is one who stands above

Us all.

He is like a prince in a fairy story

But at times acts more like the villian of the Fairy Tale

He is both, and neither

He seems so flawless,

Maybe that's why he stands above us all.

Maybe that's why girls cry his name

Maybe it's why all bow before him

A single word from him

Would end my torment.

Yet he stands aside,

And joins their jesting

He makes me feel so very small

For he has it all, and shows it rather well.

Like all others

He pushes me aside.

Am I so invisible?

Maybe thats why

I'm alone in this room that's full."

"And what do you think you're doing here?"

Miyako glanced up slowly, knowing who it was before she even laid eyes upon him. Yamato Ishida and his group of the 'popular' ones. They were the envied ones. They ruled the school, all coward before them and revered them.

But not Miyako.

While she found many very cute and rather sweet-looking, in truth they were cruel and merciless to those they saw as 'beneath' them. They ruled the school with both fear, and with their looks and confidence. They shoved those who stood up to them aside with cruel words. And while Miyako wouldn't deny there were a good dozen people in her last school she hadn't liked, she'd still treated them civilly. Codly, but civilly none the less.

Miyako didn't bother giving him the acknowledgement of standing up as she spoke. "If you weren't so blind you would see I'm writing, Yamato."

He tucked his hands in his pockets partially and cocked his head in such a way that Miyako knew he wasn't just looking at her, but down at her. The thought made her blood boil. "That's what study hall's for. The gym's ours for practice, so leave."

The word was a command and it vibrated loudly through the room. Just that command caused Miyako's blood to sing out with the need for respect. Of acknowledgement. Of the fact that she was his equal and that she stood below no one.

Miyako gestured around her. "The gymnasium belongs to the student body. And while you all may be unhappy about it, I am a student here. I have as much right to be here as you."

A few of the guys' eyes gleamed brightly, enjoying her slight courage. They prefered to break those who stood up to them, rather then just chasing the cowardly ones away. They had more fun that way.

Miyako returned to her composition notebook and started to write again. The bright blue gel pen didn't even touch the paper before her precious notebook was jerked away.

Anger flared hotly in her eyes, abandoning all pretense of calm she bolted up eyes wild with both fear and anger. That notebook was private! The poetry within carrying her most private thoughts. The boys laughed slightly. She leapt forward, the back of her mind aware of the slight clatter as her pen fell to the polished hardwood floor.

'Damn, that was my favorite pen,' she thought before her attention was directed to getting her notebook back.

"Give it back, NOW!" Miyako's voice bounced effortlessly across the concrete walls. Echoing loudly around the room like a chiming bell.

Yamato laughed lightly, holding it aloft. "Take it then."

Miyako didn't jump upward to grab it like many would in her position. She'd never reach it that way. "Give. It. Back. NOW!" She growled behind grit teeth, hands clenched at her sides as her body became taunt with anger.

A few of the guys smirked at her, while one or two backed an almost unnoticeable step away. Yamato brought the notebook down slightly, though not far enough for Miyako to make a wild grab for it. But then her eyes widened concederbly as she noticed his eyes move from side to side on the notebook. He was reading it!

She made a quick mad dive for the notebook, knocking the young teenager over in the process. Her hands grasped madly about untill they closed at last on the notebook. She jerked wildly on it, it came easily from his fingers.

The notebook safe again in her hands, Miyako began to relize the position she was in. Instantly she felt a tawny blush creep up her neck as she relized she was sprawled atop of the young rockstar in a rather un-lady like position; her legs were tangled with his, her hands on his chest and she was partly straddling the guy. Forcing down the immediate emotion that told her to jump up rather clumsily and leave, she made herself stand up calmly, though she couldn't supress the trembling that ran through her. Miyako held her head high as she gathered her books, though not to leave that as would be proclaiming them the victor of their little spar. Something Miyako wouldn't allow them the pleasure of having.

With grace she walked quickly up the bleachers and sat down on the highest one, in the corner of it near the metal railing. She felt her blush deepen as she knew the guy's eyes below were following her. Setting her books back down she reopened the notebook, though she was no longer in the mood to write.

Closing her eyes slightly she pulled back the tears of embarrassment and anger that rose hotly in her eyes. Slapping the notebook closed she pulled out the book 'Ulysses' she began to read, though her attention was in no way focused on it. Below she heard the guys mutter something then they began to take out their stuff to practice.

Miyako shook her head slightly, allowing her long dark lavender hair to shield her face from view. Against her will, thick tears began to ebb their way down her face. Her throat burned as she forced herself to bite back the whimper that edged its way forward.

Gasping in her breath she bit her bottom lip in a vain effert to stop the tears. Rubbing under eyes vicously she looked at her watch. 5 minutes to the bell. Gathering her notebooks together quickly she made her way down the bleachers and jumped off the side. Almost immediately she heard the music behind her falter slightly. Not bothering to stop even slightly she hurried out of the gymnasium and around the corner.

It was then all of her defenses crashed downward. Pain filled her being. She was tired of being strong. Tired of being the kid everyone always made fun of. Slowly she sunk to the floor and allowed the tears to countinue falling. She no longer bothered to hold back the sobs that wracked her entire being.

The anger that had made her stand up to her oppressers was now gone like wheat before the scythe. All that was left was a lonely destressed girl.

Forcing herself to gather what remained of her pride she wiped away her tears with trembling hands and stood up. That's when she felt it. That feeling you get when you know someone is watching you. Slowly Miyako turned to have her eyes meet with icy blue.

Their he stood like something out of a story book. His short blond hair falling delicately on a face a Faery would have been jealous of. For a moment in time that burned forever in eternity they just stood there. Staring at one another.

Neither dared to break the silence. Neither dared moved in fear of breaking this trance which had so suddenly been wrought upon them. In a single moment in time, the barriers between the two were gone.

Leaving bare a boy aged beyound his years and protecting his heart and mind in the only way he knew. For a moment in time Miyako Inoue saw past the cocky, rock star image of Yamato Ishida. Saw beyond the facade he showed to everyone else.

While she saw within him, he too saw her. Saw her angry defenses of being tough and unvulnerble to their taunting gone. Before him he saw a broken girl, saw tears of a thousand cruel things in her eyes. Saw an eternity of loneliness that rivaled his own.

But the moment was shattered as the laughter of his friends and jesting of seeing Miyako down the hall was brought to light. Forcefully the two ressurected their images as Miyako gave them all a trembling look of defiance before she turned on her heel and the bell rang loudly through the air.

Miyako Inoue was lost in the crowd, just as Yamato Ishida was resumed his 'normal' image.

Embarrassment. That's all Miyako Inoue could feel as she hurried home. In her mind she could still hear their snickering at her. In her mind every word she was ever called burned brightly in her mind. Yet while she felt anger toward them, it wasn't enough to fill her with the righteousness it had earlier that day.

Only pain and loneliness was left. Slowly she raised her hand to touch the red thong around her neck, linked to it what looked like a digital camera case was her D-3. At least there she was free. Hawkmon was always there for her. He never teased her or made her feel lower than anything. He was always there. Like a rock he was there to listen to her, and she in return helped with taking down Control Spires and trying to fight against the Digimon Kaizer.

Despite Hawkmon's advice she'd choosen not to join the other Digi destined. Fearing they would leave her behind, the same as they did in school. She always saw them in their little group. They didn't invite her to their group now, why would they invite her in since she was a Digi destined? They would merely use her. Ring her dry of her powers then cast her out to the cruel world and she would be alone again.

She wouldn't allow that to happen. She would protect herself. You can't get hurt if you don't let anyone in, that was how Miyako saw it. Therefor she would do just that, keep everyone out. She would still have Hawkmon to look after her, and she had herself. Two things she knew she could always count on. Hawkmon would never betray her, and she wouldn't ever betray herself.

"Hey look, it's the freak!"

Miyako gritted her teeth and forced herself not to glance up at the oh-so-fammiliar insult. Moving her chin up higher she kept her gaze forward and quickened her steps. Almost instantly she felt a brush of cold air next to her and found herself facing an unmoving wall.

Slowly she raised her eyes to meet one of Yamato's little lackeys, Sakon Chiba. He lived and breathed only to make her life hell, and the idea wasn't exactly all that far-fetched.

"Move." Miyako said softly, firmly.

"You didn't say the magic word." He said mockingly, wagging his finger at her. The very gesture made Miyako want to break off his finger.

"Move now." Miyako responded, refuseing to even force politeness knowing it would get her no farther then her first words to him had been.

"Have you guys nothing better to do then to pick on freshmen walking home?"A voice said from behind them.

Slowly Miyako turned. Golden eyes meet that of deep brown. Yagami Taichi. The soccer star. Miyako allowed her eyes to brighten slightly, while she had no romantic feelings for the older boy she knew he wasn't like his best friend Yamato. While he rarely, if ever, spoke to her he didn't ridicule her.

"Very funny, Taichi-san, we were just having some fun." Sakon responded, shoving Miyako lightly from behind.

Eyes of gold flashed fire. "Don't touch me." She said, her teeth grit.

Spinning around on her heel she turned to walk past Sakon. Suprisingly he moved out of the way. Flashing him a look of slight relief and also suspicion she started to walk around him... only to trip over his outstreched foot. Laughter errupted from behind her.

Tears edged their way into Miyako Inoue's eyes, but it wasn't from the fall. Taking a deep breath she stood, turning slightly to look at Taichi, only to find him frowning at Sakon and to see Yamato walking toward them. A ghost of a smile appeared on his face. So cruel was he.

Slowly Miyako felt the tears fall from her eyes and dribble down her cheeks. It just wasn't fair! No longer could she hold up the damn that held back the flood of salty tears. Her chest became taut with sobs that she knew would wrack her being. Not here. She couldn't cry before them. She couldn't give them the satisfaction of her tears.

Wiping them away with the back of her hand she pulled together her wracked strength and shoved Sakon angrily. "What the hell is your problem?! Well? Why can't you just leave me the hell alone?! What did I ever do to you?" She gestured around her at them, Taichi, and Yamato. "Well! I asked you a question! Or are you too stupid to answer? I want all of you to stay away from me. You so much as sit next to me in class and I swear I'll send you to the emergency room!"

Turning on her heel Miyako ran. Ran from them. Ran from the fear and pain that welled within her even after screaming at them. Behind her she could hear their laughter. She was nothing, nothing to them. They didn't care. They didn't before and they wouldn't now.

Her anger was merely a bit of amusement for them. They didn't care. Not the least bit. On and on she ran, taking no notice of where her path would lead her. Perhaps if she ran fast enough, she could escape. Escape the wretched place where all she was to anyone was a fool to be teased and ridiculed.

Finally she stopped, only to find herself in the park, about a block from her apartment. Falling to her knees Miyako let the tears come. Let the sobs wrack her being, allowed her pain to show in all its vibrant glory.

So much pain. So much anger. So much... so much of everything. Covering her face with her hands she didn't bother to wipe the tears away but to hide her sorrow. Maybe to shut out the world and escape from everything and everyone.

Passerbys glanced with pity at the lavender haired girl. But none came to comfort her. No one ever did. But one boy with chin-length indigo hair did stop to stare at the girl. Watched the tears that streamed down her cheeks with no emotion on his face.

Slowly Miyako forced herself to her feet, her arm going up to wipe away the tears. Slowly her red ringed, puffy eyes rose to meet the amethyst ones of the indigo haired boy. Unable to glare daggers at him for simply staring at her while she wallowed in her misery Miyako turned and ran. Ran once more. To escape those eyes that had stared at her, though they were not as haunting as the cruel icy blue of Yamato Ishida's.

It wasn't long before she reached her apartment. Carelessly she opened the doors and made her way to the elevater which lead to the apartment. Wordlessly she used her key to open the door and she entered shuting it lightly behind her.

Slipping off her shoes she made her way through the living room where her brother sat watching T.V. Like every other day he didn't seem to notice she was home. Silently she walked into her room and locked the door behind her. Dropping herself on the bed she lay there for a moment, debating wether she should even bother to get up.

Slowly she forced herself up, obviously she had chosen the latter. Wipeing her cheeks gently she glanced the mirror. A familiar frown marred her features as she studied her face. It was red and her hair bedraggled with tangles. Grabbing a brush she half-heartedly brushed her hair until it was smooth. The redness on her eyes was still there though it was receding quickly.

Sniffing, she pulled out her D-3 and walked over to her computer and brought up the Digital Gate. She smiled lightly. At least there she had peace. She was never ridiculed there, and the free Digimon were her friends to the end.

Quickly she pressed her D-3 against the monitor and closed her eyes as she felt herself be sucked into the the computer. Opening her eyes she momentarily smiled at the sight before her. The lush forests and the fresh air.

She glanced fondly down to the deep red short shorts and form-fitting deep pink blouse with the crest of Pure Love emblazoned on it. Lightly she touched the long bell sleeves that reached her feet. Grinning she touched her face, replacing her glasses was a white leather eye mask. Even if she saw the Digi destined today they wouldn't have a clue who she was.

"Miyako-san! I'm so glad your here. The Kaizer has erected Spires in this area!"

Miyako turned a bright smile stole her features as she caught sight of her dear friend. "Hawkmon!"

Joyously, she hugged him close as he reached her before becomeing seriouse. "That fiend set up yet anouther sphere! Ugh... well Hawkmon you better Digivolve then we can go and take care of the sphere."

Hawkmon nodded. "Yosh!"

"HAWKON ARMOUR SHINKA... HABATAKU AIJOU, HORUSMON!"

Miyako lept easily on his back and they took to the clear blue sky. For a single moment Miyako allowed herself to revel in the feeling of being in the air. Of the wind that flowed through her hair and carressed her skin like a gentle lover.

Golden eyes became hardened like stone as the Control Spire slipped into view. At that moment Miyako felt it. It was too quiet. The area wasn't buzzing with enslaved Digimon to stop them. Something was wrong. Eyes narrowed she leaned deep into Horusmon's feathers and listened. That's when she heard it. The unmistakeable cruel laughter of the Digimon Kaizer.

Anger marred her features as she whispered to Halsemon to fly low and silent. Creeping forward behind a copse of trees that did well to camouflage them. Leaning forward she heard the familiar voices of Motomiya Daisuke and Yagami Taichi. Suprised she leaned back, she hadn't known Taichi was a Digi destined. Oh well, it wasn't like that changed anything.

Maneuvering closer she saw their Digimon battered, laying uselessly before their partners, who at the moment had ropes binding them together. In front of them she saw the Digimon Kaizer standing on a Dark Tryrannomon's shoulder, laughing proudly at his deafeat of the Digi destined.

While Miyako had no desire to join the Digi destined, she knew she couldn't just leave them to the Kaizer's mercy. It wouldn't be right.

"We have to help them, Horusmon." Miyako looked around on the ground and soon found a sharp edged stone, the Digital World provides."I want you to attack the Dark Tyrannomon, I'll jump off and free the Digidestined. When I get that done, fly low and I'll hop on your back, the Digi destined will be retreating by then, O.K.?"

"Got it."

Holding on tight as Horusmon took to the air again she waited until the ground was close enough in order for her to jump off. She landed soundly on the ground and dove forward to the very suprised Digidestined.

"Who are you?" They all asked at once.

Not bothering to answer she cut the first five's bonds with ease. When she reached for the last one she felt herself tremble. Eyes of firey golden meet those of icy blue. Ishida Yamato. No. How could it be? How could he be a Digi destined?

Fearing he would know her if she didn't help him as well she cut his bonds as she turned to see Horusmon faring well against the hoardes of Dark Tyrannomon.

Turning back to the curious gazes she lowered her voice to gravely rasp. "Get out of her. There is a Digital Gate north from here, it isn't that far. Get you and your Digimon and out of here! And for the record, stay out of this forest. Its a sanctuary, it dosen't need you bringing it more to the Kaizer's attention. Now... GET OUT OF HERE!"

"Who are you?" Daisuke asked.

Miyako narrowed her eyes and responded, her voice still disguised. "That's not important. It wasn't before, why should it be now?" She said bitterly.

Turning around she ran forward, Horusmon couldn't hold the Dark Tyrannomon off much longer. "GO! Halsemon can't hold them off for much longer and if you haven't noticed all your Digimon are too weak to fight, go right now!"

They lifted their Digimon into their arms and Daisuke shouted, "we can't win today! And masked girl over here is right, so let's go!"

They turned and ran, only Yamato stayed. Eyes boring into Miyako's like fire.

"I know you."

The three words so simple yet they caused so much harm.

"Do you?" Miyako rasped out before letting out a high piched whistle, not daring to call Horusmon in fear he would truely know her identy then. "Unless you want to be a captive of his royal egoness I suggest you run, Ishida Yamato." She sneered the name as she ran forward and leapt upon Horusmon.

As they took to the air, avoiding a fire ball Miyako saw that Yamato hadn't moved from where she had left him.

"Let's get him, Horusmon."

Flying low Miyako grabbed him by the arm and jerked him aboard Horusmon's back. Behind her she could hear the Kaizer's curses of defeat.

"Why did you help me?" He asked, his voice as smooth as silk.

Miyako didn't respond, what could she say? For she herself didn't know why she'd helped him. He would only ridicule her if he knew who she was anyway. She didn't speak as she and Horusmon lowered to the ground.

"Go." Her voice low.

"No. I want to know if you are who I think you are."

Miyako smirked." And just who do you believe I am?"

"Inoue Miyako."

Miyako was carerful not to show her actual shock and she laughed without mirth. "You are far off the mark, Ishida. I don't even know whom this 'Inoue' girl is. I do suggest you get to the gate though."

With that she shoved him so he fell off Halsemon. With him gone she took flight once more. Leaning low against Horusmon's feathers she hugged him close. Why had she helped him, after all he had done? All the jokes and cruelty she had helped him.

Perhaps it was because she didn't want to leave him to the Kaizer's hands. No matter how cruel he had been to her, the Kaizer would probably torture him to no end. Though the idea did slightly appeal to her, she knew that it would be a high mark on the Kaizer's plans of taking over the Digital World and she could not allow that to happen; no matter her feelings on the matter.

The rest of the day in the Digital World was a blur for Miyako. They flew about the area, destroying Control Spires at their every whim; freeing countless Digimon in the process. As the sun began to set in the Digital World, Horusmon flew her back to her usual Digital Gateway. As always her Digimon partner knew something was wrong but knew instinctively that Miyako didn't want to talk about it. She would talk to him about it when she felt the time was right. Pressing her about it would do him little good anyhow. She could be as stubborn as a rock when she choose to be.

Sliding off Horusmon's back she smiled up at him, a fool could see it was forced but Halsemon didn't comment. He knew the smile would have been genuine, had she not seen the Digi destined today. "I'll see you tomorrow, Horusmon."

Smiling she nuzzled agenst him before turning to the Digital Gate. She turned back once to look him in the eye before allowing herself to be sucked through the computer and thrust out onto the carpeted floor which proclaimed she was in her room once more.

Standing she dropped onto the bed her eyes tracing the celing with morbid interest. Her thoughts dwelling on him. It always came back to him. No matter what. He haunted her night and day. Sometimes her thoughts were filled with nothing but loathing for him. Other times curiousty... sometimes even a sickening attraction.

But she could not deny how his dark nature and endless cruelty, it attracted her like no other. It was perverse, she knew, but it was the truth. And no matter how she hide it, it was there. Like a serpent that rose to torment her at every whim.

Perhaps that's why his actions toward her hurt her so much. Or maybe because she was just vulnerable that way. The latter was the one her mind wished to believe, but like all things sometimes what we want to belive is not nearly the truth.

Rubbing her eyes she undressed and changed into a night gown and walked out of her room. The house was loud as ever. The Inoues weren't exactly known for silence. Sighing, she walked into the living room and grabbed a bag of chips. Wolfing down nearly the whole bag and going through several sodas she walked back into her room and dropped herself onto the bed. Slowly she forced herself up and climbed beneath the covers. So tired... so very tired. Closing her eyes she let her dreams claim her. Perhaps there she would find peace. If there really is such a thing as 'peace' for her.