Author: Jenna
Rated: G
Disclaimer: I do not own anyone depicted in this story.
Description: Imainge this letter was written by Billy at the same time Dom wrote his.
Notes: This is Billy's letter, that goes hand in hand with Dom's [Crash & Burn]
>>>>> Complete
One thing I remember my grandmother taught me was that writing down feelings really helps capture your emotions. I wasn�t so sure until my last year of high school, when Rebecca Montelli rejected me. I went home and cried for about an hour, then sat down at my desk and scribbled out four pages of raw emotion.
I think I cried again as I re-read the pages, realising how much she�d hurt me. Don�t know why though, I got over it relatively quickly and it hasn�t bothered me since.
So this time, I thought why not? Why not do the same thing and pour my heart out in a letter to my best friend.
Here goes:
There is something wrong with me. I know you�ve noticed. I�ve caught you staring at me.
Thing is, I don�t know how to tell you, because I�m afraid that if I reveal what I�m so upset about, it�ll become true, it�ll be realistic. I don�t know if I�m ready for that yet.
That makes sound suspicious and dangerous. It�s not really. Well, yes it is. God, I don�t even know what I�m thinking anymore. I feel as though I�m losing my sanity. Maybe I am�
How am I supposed to put down in words what I�m feeling? I thought this would be easy, but now I�m not so sure. Why is this so hard? Why can�t I simply write words that are on the tip of my pencil?
I�m not dying. I�m not sick. I�m not homesick or grieving. I�m not upset about wrapping the movie in three days. I�m not freaking out about the future. I�m not nervous about going out for drinks tonight. I�m not thinking of things like politics and war or famine or illness.
So what is it, you�re wondering.
I think I�m in love.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
With you.
No, that�s wrong. I know I�m in love with you.
That�s why I�ve been distant, that�s why I�ve been upset and tortured. Because I�m in love with you and I�m afraid that you�ll never feel the same way.
So now I�ve written it, it�s no longer taking over my brain and destroying my life. But now that I have written it, it means it�s real.
Maybe that�s all I needed. To write the words. Maybe I�ll just tuck this letter into my wallet and never give it to you. Maybe I needed to admit to myself I love you in order to move on.
Whatever my reason for writing this, if you ever read it, know that you�re the most special person in my life and I love you with all my heart. You�re perfection, Dommie.
Love Billy.
