ARC Hacker Identified By
Aegis Kleais™ During CTF Meet

Roger and Ebert give ARC two thumbs down


By G.C.I. Maxwell

Isn't it wonderful when an event takes place in your life that causes you to completely redefine a preconceived notion you held about a person, place, or thing? Like the first time your parents served you beets, and you thought they'd taste like cranberries, but it really turned out they tasted more like bat shit? And from that day forward, you hated beets with a vengeance, didn't you? Even though they looked every bit as convincing as Grandma's "special sauce" she whipped up at Christmas and Thanksgiving.

A similar trend has started to take place in my life, as I struggle with my notions of ARC and what they represent. A few nights ago (yes, this article was written ex post facto...SUE ME already) I had the privilege of watching ARC come down hard on a hacker that had wheedled his way past VengShield into a Capture the Flag match being held by the clan, and began to flaunt his "haxxoring prowess," only to have death and destruction rained down upon him by both ARC and the opposing team. It was quite a sight.

This, of course, caused me to feel a great deal of respect for ARC for their actions, and their (representation) of disgust toward the very thought of someone playing illicitly. These feelings, however, lasted precisely one night, after which time they exploded in a horrific "boom" that defied the very heavens in its volume and depth. What could cause such a radical 180-degree turnaround in my thoughts?

They only hate NON-ARC hackers.

That's right, folks. The very next night I excitedly joined an ARC CTF meet, looking forward to some hack-free game play. Of course, my delusions were short-lived, for moments after my arrival in the match, my comm unit crackled to life with the voice of Aegis Kleais™, BattleMech pilot extraordinaire, chastising "ARC_Kevin" for using an obviously hacked Raven variant. Apparently, the Raven was performing aerial acrobatics unheard-of for a jump-incapable, 35-ton electronics warfare 'Mech.  "ARC_Kevin" (whose asinine remarks can be read in the left-hand column), however,  flagrantly ignored the requests being made by both Aegis Kleais™ and other pilots for a change of 'Mech or a change of venue, and continued to participate in the match for several more minutes before deciding a larger, even more pumped-up (read: hacked) variant was in order. 

After having joined in a flying Atlas (no, I'm not making this up), "ARC_Kevin" tried to downplay the severity of his transgression and convince all parties involved that his flying Skeletor look-alike was legitimate. Aegis Kleais™ quickly rectified the error in Kev's thinking by stating that the use of hacks has a propensity of making the user of said 'Mechs appear to be a dumb ass.

At which point, "ARC_Kevin" left the building.

See, folks, even if ARC condones hackers amongst their ranks while hypocritically condemning the use of them by "outsiders," getting rid of the little wankers isn't all that difficult. You just have to speak the official vocabulary of the ARC Clanners themselves. Use simple vocabulary, such as "dumb ass," "butt brain," and "ass face." Avoid terminology such as "hacks are irresponsible," "drugs are harmful to your system," and "the IRS will raid your home  if you don't pay your taxes by April." This sort of verbiage is foreign to them. 


What am I getting at here? Simply that ARC is a two-faced clan that permits amongst their ranks the very practices which they themselves decry others partaking in, be it hacking, antagonism of other pilots, or the controversial practice of "legging" opponents.

They're a bunch of ass faces.

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