Chrissy's Manhattan Stories Date: 2/21/00 Company: Pete

"Don't Trust the Natives"

It was decided they Pete and I would go to Manhattan on the 21st, since I didn't have school and he got out of work at 1 p.m. He got out later because the replacement was late, so I got picked up at about 2:30 p.m. Which wasn't bad since I was trying to force a shit out. Well, it never happened then, so I waited. He called to find out the directions to my house, since it is quite hard to find. So off we were.

We went back to his neighborhood to pick up the Q15 . . . it is only fifteen minutes away, but only coming about once every hour (President's Day Schedule.) Finally the bus came and we hopped aboard. It was a long time since Pete last took public transportation (he has a car.) While we were on our way to Flushing, he saw one of his many annoying customers. Just ignore the coat and he will go away, and he did. We hit Flushing in about fifteen minutes and so off to the subway we went.

Ahh, smell the urine. Long time, but not that long, for me anyway. So on a car we went. We looked out the window at a car lot, and the roof tops. Then I spied some tourists . . . watch as they huddle. You can always spot them out. It is the fear in their eyes . . . I feed off of it, as a native New Yorker that is. Now where in New York do you find a white (pasty), wholesome, blond family? Just on the train when they are site seeing . . . play their game . . . give them something to talk about to their friends back home. Don't come back now, you hear!

We transferred at 42nd street to get the 5 train downtown. No problem there, but on the track was a different story. The train stopped, and the conductor attempted to fill us in on the situation, but you know how the speaker systems are down there. It sounded like the parents of Charlie Brown. So with no where to go . . . I investigated. I opened a door . . . nothing inside. Then looked around at the fellow freaks. Business men . . . since we were on our way to Wall St. Next we heard a train approaching and I yelled out Bang! It was funny. Just think if it hit us . . . that would have been fun. With the train moving once again, we were off to the Wall St. stop.

We got off and walked to the Ferry. Once we got inside we both needed to pee. See a fellow obsessive peeier. The Ferry was going to take awhile since we missed the one at dock. So out we went into the salty air. Pete told about his days working on boats. He also rated the techniques of the boats coming in. We once again ran into tourists, this time they were less fearful . . . the odds were better. I can take three at a time . . . minus their video equipment. They after all can use them as weapons. Pete can take five, maybe, if they fight clean. Finally it was getting cold and Pete finished smoking so in we went. Some man was singing for money, I think, or maybe it was for himself, who knows. The Ferry finally came and we all were pushed in like cattle. Run fast and get a good seat.

We sat outside on the side facing Brooklyn. The weather was good, not too hot not too cold. The wind made it a bit chilli, but not bad. We watched as the boat took off. I pointed out the odd way the buildings shook when we moved. It looked trippy . . . best way to view life. I need no drugs. I have the mind set already. A little birdie named Freddy told me not to fret, for Butch will kick some ass. Nice birds, very friendly and feared nothing. They are natives. Once the boat docked in Staten Island we had to pretend to get off. Just sit inside and there will be no trouble. We saw the tourists again . . . once waiting with us. Pete still wanted to figure out where they were from so we stalked them. We sat right behind them, but they got quite . . . They feared us. Once the moment passed, they spoke up . . . Brits, nothing special. So off we went on the Statue of Liberty side. See the sights, make picture comments and dock back in Manhattan.

On our way out we once again bumped into our tourists. They knew we were there before we did. I mean it was a coincidence, trust me. But what happened next wasn't. We stalked them down the ramp, they turned back into the station, and so we left them. Up Broadway we went. Hungry, we ate a Carosso's . . . a tradition. He had a mushroom slice, I a plain. After that to J& R we went. He wasn't familiar with Manhattan so it was my show. Up we went till we hit the village. Nope stopping, just walking. We walked and walked until I saw Lucky Changs. I wasn't so lost then. Hungry we went to McDonalds (the one at 1st ave & 6th St.) Bathroom break and shakes. Then off into the wild black yonder. Walking looking for Little Italy, no luck, so we train station hunt. I attack! Ha . . . beware the hyper girl. I am the Lizard Queen! He rings bells and the yuppies question "Who is it?" Wave hello to the eating humans. Bang into the security gate Pete goes . . . I like the sound. Station found and we take the C train to the E then transfer to the 7.

Pete learns to train hop. Not just once, but about 7 times . . . learn well, teach well. Sleepy train ride, ans so I attack again. Damn you awake! I need to fight. Let the natives have a thing to see other than the train posters. Springs stretch out and do not get trapped in the door, why? Flushing arrives in a rather quick time and off we got to get the ever so slow Q15.

Long wait for the bus . . . so I attack again. Keep warm never stop moving and see the fear. Damn no fear there . . . humm why? I will learn his skills and use them against him, ahh poking. That always works . . . squeal like a pig. Fear the Lizard Queens little pig. Bus finally comes and the long line finally reaches the door. Get seats in back near the back door . . . fire escape. At his house, see the dogs, bird, frog, and sisters . . . off we go . . . (I stop here . . . no longer a Manhattan story.)

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