Prologue

“No, Justin! Stop it. This isn’t write, your drunk…Justin stop…”

“Shhhhh….Jess-quiet-it’ll-be-fine…” the words were slurred together, making Jess feel ill to her stomach, he was drunk, and wasn’t going to remember anything.

Chapter 1

Jessica Blackwell let a heavy sigh pass her lips. She was disappointed with her self, almost a month ago to date, for the first time in her 19 years of existence, she screwed up beyond repair. Not only had she lost her virginity to a drunken popstar, but shed done it without protection, and was late.

The back up pianist for the NSYNC band stared at herself in the mirror. In The End played faintly in the back ground as Jess gazed at herself in the mirror. Staring back at her was her own piercing green/blue eyes and light blond hair. Turning sideways she looked at her profile, she hadn’t yet seen a doctor, but if what she feared was true, in little under 4 months her belly wouldn’t be looking so flat and toned anymore.

She was constantly on the edge of a breakdown lately, and knew she was pushing away her friends, especially Justin. He didn’t remember anything, thus he didn’t understand why she was suddenly pushing him and the others away, and his hurt, made her hurt.

A knock on the door brought Jess back to reality. Pulling open the door she had to fight the strong urge not to slam it shut again. Standing on the other side of the door was Joey, casually leaning on the doorframe, and Justin, looking too adorable for his own good. It made her heart ach in a bad way.

“Hey Jess, we were going out and thought you might wanna come. Wanna?” Justin spoke up with a grin.

“Uhh.. n-no thanks, g-guys, ill t-take a rain check” Jess stuttered, glancing apologetically between the two.

“Oh, ok” Justin replied, looking a bit confused. He turned and headed down the hall, glancing back to ask Joey if he was coming.

“Ill be there in sec. Kid.” Joey answered turning back to Jess. “ Were talking, now.”

“Joe, no, there’s nothing to talk about” she said beginning to fidget yet still stepping back to let him into her room so she could close the door.

“Yes there is, your pulling back, your not hanging out and talking to us as much, what’s up?” he asked, concern etched in his voice.

“Joe….I don’t want to talk about it ok?” she sighed stepping back and turning away from him.

“Justin, it has something to do with Justin doesn’t it???” He asked after a moment’s pause.

“I….N-…Yes, Yes it does” Jess emitted defeated. “How’d you know?” she asked gazing up at him suspiciously..

“You may not be talking to any of us much. But its evident you don’t wanna be within 5 feet of him at all. So spill what is it?” “Its not that easy Joey, I hurt, and its not something I can fix…”

“What’d he do, cause god help me ill murder him if he hurt you.”

“I-…Joey its not his fault, remember about a month ago in LA?”

“Yah, we got you two into the over 21 club and got Justin as drunk as hell. It was great”

“Yah… well remember, I- I drove him back early…and Joe…well…uh…Joey we had sex … and…”

“ and what?” Joey asked looking confused.

“and I’m late” came out the barely audible whisper.

“Oh…god…does he know?” he asked pulling her into his embrace.

“Know what Joe? That I’m pregnant…with his child? Or that we even had sex?” came out the strangle response.

“I’m guessing he doesn’t does he….have you seen a doctor” Joey had pulled them over to the couch. Jesses small frame was now circled up in Joeys lap as he rocked the gently.

“no” the small voice said.

“Get up, were going” he said getting up and placing her on her feet.

“What- huh- Joey? No… no…no no no no no!” she belted out jumping forward in surprise.

“Yes.”

“I thought you were going out with the other guys!”

Glancing at his watch Joey replied “They probably got sick of waiting for me and left, so lets go!”

“Jo—argh fine!” stomping across the room Jess flipped off her CD player and grabbed her shoes from their place beside the door. Straitening up she glared at Joey “Well if were going. Lets get a move on!”

Walking down the hall, Jess was relieved to see that the fans still hadn’t figured out that the boys had changed hotels while they were in LA and it peaceful walking out to the car.

“Ms. Blackwell?” The receptionist called Jessica from behind her desk. It was almost midnight and her and Joey had been in the 24hr walk in clinic for a couple of hours and had been waiting for the results for about half and hour.

“Yes” Jessica asked rising to stand, Joey a step behind her.

“Here are you results.” The repositions replied holding out the plain manila envelope.

Walking up to the front desk Jessica retrieved the envelope from the lady and tucked it under her arm. Following Joey out of the room and down the hall, she couldn’t hold in the heavy sigh. Reaching the car he two climbed in. Jess sat staring out the windshield while Joey turned in his seat to look at her.

“Jess, the results aren’t going to change by starring out the windshield, do you want me to open it for you?” he asked leaning over, his breath creating frosty cloud in the slightly frigid April air.

“N-no….I-Ill do it…” Jess started to reach for the envelope, but mid reach she recoiled quickly, heaving another heavy sigh she grabbed it and started pulling at the string that held it shut. As the string came loose Jess pulled out the two sheets of paper. Flipping them over she quickly swiped at her eyes at the sight on the page. Typed neatly in bold letters were the 8 letters she had hoped wouldn’t be there. Positive. Glancing at Joey’s concerned look she handed the first sheet to him and turned to the next one. At the top were 5 recommended doctors, just below them was the title, 3 options, and a short paragraph about abortion, adoption and keeping the baby, and just below that was a list of book as authors to look in on expecting a baby.

“Jess….” Looking up at Joey she gave him a half smile through her tears. Tears of happiness or sadness she wasn’t sure, but they were there.

“Ill be fine Joey. I have a great friend like you,” She said leaning over to kiss him on the cheek.

“You have all of us Jess, me, Jace, Chris, Lance…J…” He replied scrunching up his nose slightly.

“No Joe… I couldn’t… can’t tell him, not yet, I’m not ready, he doesn’t even remember the night, as for the others…. Chris and Jace are to close to him, they couldn’t keep a secret…. And I think Lance already suspects something, so its only time until he asks.” With a sigh she looked up at him. Giving him a rueful smile she place the papers back in the folder and placed the envelope on her lap. “Let’s go Joey, I’m ready for some sleep.”

Turning the key in the ignition Joey through the gear shift in to drive and pulled out of his space in the almost empty lot, taking a left into the street he headed the car back towards the hotel.