.::PREVIOUS MUSINGS::.
[14/05/04]
I have been wondering for a while what I might write in this column. But having thought about it in depth while procrastinating (do I really do anything else after all?) I decided that it shouldn’t be too hard for me, of all people, to find something to say. After all, there are three things you should know about Shite Vol 2 (aka me)
a) I’m opinionated
b) I’m argumentative
c) I’m honest
So in the future, I thought, loyal DISUDians could choose a topic to throw at me and no doubt I would have an opinion on the matter. That is, if in the future, anyone even reads this stuff.
So considering DISUD was proposed as an online journal I thought there was nothing more appropriate for an opening discussion/topic than writing. Now as part of my first year arts course I’m taking a subject by the name of Autofictions. This is curious because it gives writing a manufactured impression, as if, once I complete the course I will be qualified to spit out fictions automatically. But to be honest, that’s not what the subject is about. Given, there are cues in place to get us in the process of writing, but nobody even pretends that fiction is a simple matter of replication and thoughtless production. Each week we receive an exercise with which to produce a piece of writing. These are not handed in, but geared towards an exercise folio, which I handed in yesterday. I faced the unfortunate dilemma of producing pieces too long to fit the exercise quota of 200-300 words per piece and as a result, my exercises leave much to be desired. But despite that most recent failure, they will be available in my folio which I am hoping will somehow prove my worth as an aspiring writer.
Now you might ask why I want to be a writer, why I bother in a world which so obviously has no market for writing. Given the capitalist society we live in writing is a commodity to be sold and to produce profit. And I won’t get into politics, at least just yet, because it’s complex and corrupt (and it makes me very angry). But this is relevant, because publishers want works that will sell. Honestly I think it’s all rubbish. I don’t believe in God, and I’m inclined, like some of the old philosophers we learn about in Philosophy (someone-other-than-god knows why I learnt anything in that heap of rubbish posing as a subject – don’t get me wrong I love Philosophy, just not this particular brand/department) – yes anyway, like some old philosophers (I wouldn’t know who because I haven’t learnt anything) I’m inclined to be of the notion that life is absurd. Don’t get me wrong, by saying life is absurd I’m not saying that I don’t believe there is a reason to live. I just don’t believe in an inherent purpose. We, the human race are the product of some scientific explosion, something along the lines of the big bang, and over millions, billions of years we’ve come to this. So good on us. I would’ve liked to be alive a little later when we had cooler things to play around with, but this will have to do. And so such a life seems somewhat devoid of spirituality, given almost everything and anything can be traced back to chemical reactions in our brain (wow, I learnt something in Psych also) and what can’t will be discovered soon enough by some breakthrough in science. But I’m unsure where I stand here. Like all the mystical dreamers I suppose I would like to think that there’s something magical about this place we live in. Where that can come from, having ruled out a higher power, and contributed our existence to evolution, I don’t know. But in such a life where this is no apparent purpose or mysticism there is still the everyday experience of human life. And consciousness is a very different concept to the ordered, systematic system that is our nervous system/physiological body. So that is our ordeal. The often confusing mixture of feelings/emotions/whatever else that is known, at least scientifically as our conscious experience of the world/life.
But what does writing have to do with this, I’m sure you’ve been asking for a while now, either that or you gave up a while ago and hate me. Well, basically consciousness is all we can know, as humans we are not yet equipped with the ability to tap into our natural physiological selves and understand each minute process that goes towards something as seemingly simple as perceiving the text you see on this screen. So writing is a way of addressing consciousness. Writing is a way of representing, dissecting and analysing consciousness. Writing may be the best way to communicate between multiple beings a common experience. How else do we know that we are not alone (as may be the indication) but through communication? I do not in any way advocate writing to be the only sufficient form of communication, but it is one. Consciousness is full of dilemmas, of sorrows, of insecurities, of all sorts of other depressing stuff that outweighs, for most, the good. And if you’re a naturally inclined romantic like I tend to be, and have watched that weird-ass ‘Teknolust’ film I watched yesterday you would’ve identified with one of those coloured robot women when she said ‘she’s encoding words too, what she really meant was love’. To take you back to the moment this crazy experimenter woman had said that all she needed was time. But these robots were intuitive enough to know she meant love. So maybe love is the solution to all problems. I really doubt it, but it can certainly seem that way. Suddenly all your insecurities seem tangible and able to be solved, with the support, at the least of this one other human being. Not that I really know what it’s like, but I can imagine.
So I could go on forever. But what I’m getting at is that so many things in this life, in the grand scheme of things seem worthless. To me, writing isn’t one of them. It defies death, provides the opportunity of communication beyond the grave (provided it has been written down somewhere, and someone reads it) of worries/musings/whatever that, while at first may seem context encased, transcend their time. But not only do they transcend time, they transcend the individual and that is the beauty of writing. It might not be the specific thing that you share an admiration of, more the feeling of admiration, part of course of this thing we call consciousness. So this all seems a bit vague. I seem like a wanker. And I had wankers/pretentiousness more than nearly everything. But maybe you get me. DISUD was obviously founded on humour, but also on the desire for expression in the presentation of a journal/magazine. So here we are.
Before I bid you good day citizens, I will let you in on something of mine. Because I love writing and because it interests me, I collect sayings/things that relate to it. So if you have any, feel free to submit them or add to the list.
1. The best writing tells you something you already know.
I can’t remember where I got this from, possibly a writing lecture, maybe a film. So does it? Is it what I was just talking about, the ability to convey emotions to others that they can identify with? And while I don’t think this quote really assumed to sum up the entire process of writing, writing is so valuable because of its ability to shift perspective. To help you identify with people/things/emotions you may not have otherwise/yet. Like an actor places themselves in the mind of someone else… writing is pretty similar. As you may be able to tell, I love film just about as much, if not equally as much as writing.
2. Writers crave experience.
Got this one off the L word. I think it was pretty insightful. I know it’s true, at least in my case it is. So what is it about experience that I, at least, crave? I guess in part it’s about living life to the full, not pigeonholing yourself in anything in particular. I guess being open-minded is helpful for writing. That allows that shift of perspective, the empathy that I think you need to avoid becoming too biased. Don’t get me wrong passion for something or other is a very good thing (quite the opposite to pretentiousness, it would rank as just about my #1 appreciated ting), but passion and open-mindedness are in no way mutually exclusive. Have you lost me? But yeah, I like this one.
Well I seem to have lost the others for now. So that will have to do.
Good day citizens,
SV2 aka… don’t worry a cool aka will come soon.
.::© 2004 - SHITE - Vol. 2.0::.