Disclaimers- We don't own, really want too, don't sue, no money, boo-
             hoo!

Warnings- RELENA-BASHING! It's what makes the world a better place!

Authors' Notes- C&C are welcomed!

"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"

                A Sunday Morning with the Gundam Boys 

"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"~"

*Part 5*


               *Next, next, next, NEXT Sunday (When Noin comes back 
from the Bahammas)*

Miss Noin: Good morning, class!!!!!!! *smiles*

Duo: Wow!! She actually smiled!!! That's amazing-we gotta call the
press!!

Trowa: *on board*  It's not the first time that she's smiled. So shut
up. *Quatre translates*

Duo: Yeah, Trowa, who's making me?

Miss. Noin: I am!! Now be quiet. Today we will be talking about
crucifixion. No-on second thought, how about baptism?? No, crucifixion.

               *Heero walks in*

Duo: Hi Heero!!! Today we're talking about crucifixion!!!!!!!

Heero: Crucifixon?? That takes too long. Why not just shoot them with
a gun instead?? *Rubs hands together* But then again...It's an
EXCELLENT way to decompose the living soul by slow torture...heh, heh,
heh...watch where your eyes wonder Relena, heh, heh, he- Did I say that
out loud? *Everybody face faults*

Wufei: How DISHONORABLE!!!! A sword is much better than both of those
ways!! *silence* Even Nataku thinks so!!! It's more graceful!

Duo: YEAH!!! More blood comes out! It's cool!!!

               *Everyone face faults*

Miss Noin: Anyways-wait, aren't we missing a student??

Quatre: Yes, we are. Where's Relena??

Duo: Yeah, where's your girlfriend, Heero?? *Heero glares*
              
               *Relena walks in*

Relena: HEWE I AM!!! I like being called 'Heewo's  giwlfwiend'!

Duo: I said 'Hee-RO'! Not 'Hee-WO'!!!

Heero: Hide me!!!!!!

Relena: Heeeeeewoooooo!!!!!!! Millwiardo still says you have to give
me a wittle kiss!!!

Heero: Nooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!

Duo: *adding to the excitement* Yessssssssssssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Do it for the poor!

Trowa: *on board* Yes??? Do it for the poor, Duo?? What happened to
cooties? And why are you saying yes? *Quatre translates*

Duo: I don't know. I just said it to argue with Heero. Tee-hee! It's
fun! *Imitates Sailor Moon* I'm Sailor Moon! Champion of anti-cooties!
And bringer of DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTHHHHHH!!!
              
               *Everyone groans and face faults*

Wufei: How very DISHONORABLE!!!!! Men NEVER imitate weak women!

Duo: Huh? Who was I imitating? Noim- I mean Noin?

Miss Noin: Excussssse me!! As I was saying, today we will talk about
crucifixion.

Duo: Shingami!!!! Cruse this!!! I already know what crucifixion is!!!
SHINIGA- Is anybody listening to me?

Heero: Mission accepted.

Trowa: *on board* When do we start??

Quatre: I HATE killing people!! It's horrid!! H-O-R-R-I-D!!!

Wufei: The sword is much better than that DISHONORABLE way of killling.
You know what I say!

Duo: No...we don't. *Says in a sarcastic voice face faulted*

Wufei: The sword is mightier then the pen. Now there's a weapon!
*Everybody face faults, and sweat drops*

Relena: Heewo, I would go thwough cwucifixion just to get won wittle
kiss fwom you!!! Awen't you fwattered??

Heero: Happy, happy, joy, joy. *Rolls his eyes* Miss Noin!!! GET HER
AWAY!!! Before I REALLY shoot her.

Miss Noin: Enough!!! Can anyone tell me what crucifixion is?? I know
you already answered this on your test, but I still would like an
answer.

Trowa: *on board* A process to put one to death involving a cross, and
nails.

Quatre: A HORRIBLE way to kill somebody!!! I hate killing!!

Duo: Why don't you just read my test?? It's there.

Heero: An excellent way to decompose a living soul by putting one
through slow torture. *bored expression* Why not just use a gun??
It's faster.

Wufei: I agree with Heero, except I would say, why not just use a
sword??

Relena: Heewo, would you give me a kiss??

Heero: I feel sick.

Relena: Poow Heewo.

Trowa: *on board* The only reason he's sick because of you. *When no
one translates, he gets attention by banging it on Quatre's (poor)
head* Sorry. I got sick of banging it on the table. *Adds to the
message*

Quatre: Ow!!!!!! *then he reads the board to the class*

Miss Noin: Well, those are all good reasons, but-*she is cut off by a
screaming*

Duo: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! Relena kissed me!!!!!!!
I'm going to die of cooties!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm stain with saliva from a
WOMAN!!! WAH!!!!! SHINIGAMI! This could be the end pallll....I really
enjoyed my 6 years of liffffffffffffeeeeeeeee............*Plays dead*

               *Miss Noin turns to Relena, but gets no explanation
since Relena is crying uncontrollably*

Heero: Poor Duo.

Quatre: I thought Relena only liked Heero.

Relena: *pausing long enough to explain* I *sob* do!!!! But as I was
tuwning *sob* to kiss Heewo, he moved so *sob* I kissed ugwy Duo!!

Duo: *indignantly says...back obviouly from the dead* I am NOT
ugly!!!! I am WAY cuter then you, because I am SHINIGAMI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You STUPID FOOL!!!

               *Everyone face faults*

Heero: Thanks for taking the cootie infested kiss for me, Duo.

Trowa: *on board* I don't think he's all that thrilled. *Quatre
translates*

Duo: *from his position on the floor* Of course I'm not!!! Now I'll
die a DISHONORABLE death by cooties!! Heero even makes it sound TWICE
as better! Geez Heero! Don't have to rub it in!!!! *Spits everywhere...
espeacially on Relena, who doesn't really care since she's already
soaked in her tears* I STILL think that this is very DISHONORABLE!!!

Wufei: That's MY line!!!!!!!! INJUSTICE!!!!!!!!! That is most
DISRESPECTFUL to steal!!!

Quatre: This may break your bubble, Duo, but cooties aren't real.

Duo: *turning his ADORABLE (Author 2: sigh...) violet eyes to Quatre*
They aren't?? I think I'm gonna be sick.

Quatre: No, and you aren't going to be sick!

               *Everyone is silently watching this conversation take
place, except for a few sobs from Relena*

Duo: I don't believe you!!! I will get sick!!!

Quatre: It's true. My sisters said. All twenty-nine of them. I never
thought that the great 'Shinigami' was afraid of 'cooties'. But you
won't get sick!!!

Duo: I see. So I'm not going to die. *looks relieved, then smiles* Of
course I'm not going to die, because I am SHINIGAMI!!!!!!!!!!!
SHINIGAMI isn't going to die from mere cooties!!!!!! SHINIGAMI
LIVES!!!! I still feel sick! Is that 'suppose' to happen if you're
the 'God of Death'? *Quatre shruggs* Hn. Some help you are! I could
get sick!

               *Everyone face faults*

Wufei: I wanna watch Mulan.

               *Everyone face faults again*

Wufei: Oops...did I say that out loud...???

Everybody: Yep. *Wufei crumbles into to dust, and back again (pointless)*

Miss Noin: Well then, since that was cleared up, I believe we can go back to our lesson.

               *12 pairs of eyes are focused on her*

Miss Noin: *flustered* Oh..well...thanks for the immediate attention!!!

Quatre: I can't read the clock because Duo's circular thing connected to his neck is in the way,
*Duo: Hey!!* but I think it is time to go.

Miss Noin: Is that so??? Well then...but I'm going to assign homework for you.

               *1 sob, and 5 groans are detected*

Miss Noin: The homework will be to dress up as a character from the BIBLE *Noin hears 5 groans,
and one sob...again. Then glares at the 6 year-olds* and give a creative oral report on that
person. Well, class is dismissed!!!!!!!! >Hn! What disrespectful children! Oh well, you learn
to love them...sort of...a little....WHO CARES?<

All: Yes!!! *sob*

Quatre: Bye Miss Noin! *Noin waves them off*
              
               *6 figures about knee cap high (At least to our D.A.R.E. officer) run out of the
door*

Miss Noin: That should be amusing-they can't really mess this one up-I
should go find Milliardo- Ahh...my- WHAT DO YOU WANT!!! *Yells at the
janitor* Oh...sorry...
               
               *10 minutes later after Duo leaves class*

Duo: I feel SICK!!! *Run to the bathroom. Moans and groans are heard
from the outside.*
               
               *A minute later a very pale Duo walks out cluthing his
stomache*

Duo: Stupid Quatre! Cooties ARE real!!! *Little did Duo...remember...?
Duo didn't eat ...ahemm...A PROPER breakfast*

To be continued....

%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%

Author: Incase you wanted to know- Duo will be attending Sunday school
next week, so don't worry.
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