Heh. If Treize and Zechs(13x6), Noin and Relena (9xR) as a couple really irks ya, or Heero and 
Duo(1x2)... don't read this!!! The Bishounen Camera ain't mine, I just sort of obtained it... 
heh heh... And yes, this fic is very much YAOI and YURI thank you. Oh yeah! Disclaimer: I don't 
own Gundam Wing, Crisco, OR Cheez-Its(although I own a box of Cheez-Its, but I don't think that 
counts...). Enjoy minnaaaaa!


"The Bishounen Camera" Part 3
by Shinigami Baby


Lady Une was not easy at all to get by. She was a bigger threat than Catherine, and when she 
got physical... ouch. Shinigami Baby caressed her tail gently and remembered what happened 
earlier...

*****

"What the HELL are you doing in Treize-sama's office?!"

"Uh... hoping to get some Yaoi action?" Shinigami Baby answered cheekily.

Lady Une wasn't pleased. "Yaoi? Treize-sama? Hmph! Unlikely..."

Shinigami Baby smirked. 'She's got no idea....' "Hey what are you- ITAIIIIIIIII!!!!"

Lady Une dragged Shinigami Baby out of Treize's office by her tail and threw her out into the 
bushes.

This was going to take a plan. Shinigami Baby's head began to hurt already...

*****

Shinigami Baby placed the Bishounen Camera in the window of Treize's office and waited... and 
waited... aaand waited... and--

"Shhh! Did she see you?"

"I don't think so. So... how do you wanna do this?"

"Well YOU got to be the seme last time, I think it's only fair that I get to be the seme this 
time."

"Ohhh alright... big baby..."

Shinigami Baby smiled. OOOH! Was she getting a lemon!?

"Okay, here's the Crisco..."

"Crisco?!"

"We ran out of the good stuff."

"But Crisco? Come on now..."

Damn it... maybe not...

"FINE! You just won't get any."

"Good, 'cuz I didn't wanna be the uke ANYWAY!"

"Bitch."

Shinigami Baby sweatdropped. Treize and Zechs were having one of THOSE fights. 'Blehh, I bet 
Heero and Duo are being more intresting right now...' she thought as she picked up the 
Bishounen Camera and headed off. Passing the grocery store in the Neko-moblie, she stopped 
short and sped into the parking lot. She saw Duo's hearse (is that how it's spelled?).

She ran into the grocery store and tracked down Duo using her 'Bishounen Radar'. He was in the 
snack isle. She approached with caution, turning the camera on Duo.

"This is the Braid Bishounen here in what is called the 'grocery store'." She began. "The Braid 
Bishounen is a hyper creature and tends to get stuck in a lot of Cross-Dressing, RFO(Relena 
Finds Out), and 1x2 fics. Usually the uke, he is stuck with the duty of putting up with Heero's 
weird fetishes such as maid outfits and whipped cream." The camera panned down to the contents 
of the shopping carriage. Along with insane amounts of junk food and steak, there was whipped 
cream, chocolate syrup, honey... Duo was in for some fun tonight. Either that or... nah, he was 
in for some fun tonight. *wink*

"Okay lessee... I think I got everything I need here, now where's Hee-chan...?" Duo asked 
himself.

"We see the Braid Bishounen here rechecking his list, wondering where his--"

"DUO! Omae o korosu!"

"Ahh... the DeathGlare Bishounen..."

Duo sweatdropped. "Oi Hee-chan... heh heh..."

"What the HELL are we gonna do with all this food!?" Heero demanded.

"Eat it, DUH!" Duo replied sarcastically. That comment was followed by a violent tug on his 
braid. "ITAI!"

"Hn. Serves ya right ya smartass..." Heero said.

Duo pouted.

"Oh, don't do that... Gomen ne, koi."

Duo smiled and was about to glomp Heero, buuuuut...

"HEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOO! Here I am so come and KILL meeee!"

Shinigami Baby hid behind the Cheez-It display in fear. "It's the Stalker Shoujo!!! Possibly 
the most hated out of all Shoujo(besides the shrieky Dubbed Suzaku no Miko Shoujo), the Stalker 
Shoujo is very clingy and quite dense. Unaware of her target- the DeathGlare Bishounen-'s 
*ahem* preferences, the Stalker Shoujo takes it upon herself to... well, STALK him."

"Hn. Ohayou Relena." Heero greeted dryly.

Relena ran up to Heero and hugged him so hard his eyes crossed. Duo watched, his left eye 
twitching ever so slightly.

"Oh Heero, I missed you SO much!" To emphasize just how much she missed Heero, she nearly 
squeezed the life out of him. Heero made a small grunt. Duo's eye twitched some more.

"Ooooh I feel a bitch fight coming on..." Shinigami Baby said, peeking the Bishounen Camera 
lens between 2 boxes of Cheez-Its.

"Oh, hey Duo-kun, I didn't even see you over there!" Relena said, smirking.

Duo just gave a fake smile in response. "Well, I'm here." He said through clenched teeth. He 
grabbed Heero's arm. "C'mon Heero, I wanna get outta here so I can eat."

Relena tugged on Heero's other arm. "But I want Hee-chan to go with ME."

" 'Hee-chan'!?" Heero asked surprised.

" 'Hee-chan'!?" Duo echoed. "Only I can call him that!"

"Huh?!" Relena was just a bit shocked. "What do you mean Duo?"

Duo kissed Heero on the cheek. "I mean, HIME [1], Hee-chan is MINE."

Heero tried to hold back a smile. A possesive Duo always turned him on. Duo snaked his arm 
around Heero's waist. "C'mon koi, I'm makin' dinner tonight and I'M the main course." He stuck 
his tongue out at Relena and walked away with Heero and the shopping cart.

Relena stood there for many minutes and a breeze that came from nowhere blew a newspaper across 
her face[2].

"Things are gonna get ugly, minna..." Shinigami Baby whispered.

Suddenly Relena radiated a scary red battle aura like Tamahome's [3] and ran outside after Duo 
and Heero. Shinigami Baby wasn't far behind, chanting "Cat Fight" over and over again.

Relena made it out to the parking lot and quickly located her prey. Heero and Duo were loading 
their groceries into the trunk of the hearse (did I spell this right??), not expecting the 
oncoming carnage. She was just about there when a voice caught her attention.

"Oi! Relena!"

Relena spun around and saw Lucrezia Noin running toward her.

"Hello, Noin."

Noin was catching her breath. "Relena, have you seen Zechs around?"

"Eerr, can't say I have, Noin."

"... You're lying. Where is he!?"

"Agh! He's at Treize Khushrenada's house!"

"Why would he be there?"

"Why do *you* think?"

"AAAAAAH! Noooooooooo!" Noin screamed. "Not HIM too!"

Relena nodded sadly. "Yes, I know. Hn. As it turns out, Heero's jumped over to their side of 
the fence as well."

"Heero too!?"

"Hai."

"I'm all alone now!!!"

"ME TOO!"

The two young women held eachother sobbing.

"Ooooh, I smell YURI!" Shinigami Baby said happily.

Noin tilted Relena's chin up and kissed her gently. "Let's go to MY house. Who needs guys, 
anyway, ne?"

Relena smiled and the tow of them ran off into the sunset holding hands. (Awww! Kodak Moment!) 
Shinigami Baby wiped a tear from the corner of her eye and sniffled. "That was beautiful! 
*sniff*"

The hearse pulled away quickly.

"KUSO! I missed 'em!" Shinigami Baby shouted as she ran after the car as fast as her legs would 
allow her before giving up.


[1] Hime- Japanese for princess
[2] That always happens in dramatic moments for no reason at all. I just it would be kinda 
funny heehee!
[3] If you've seen Fushigi Yuugi (Mysterious Play) you know what I'm talking about. Trowa's 
done this in two of my fics ("Duo? Gay? NEVER!...Right?" and "Night Out At The Roller-Disco")
as well. It's just funny to picture them doing this. *snicker*


Okayyy that concludes my documentary series. *Reluctantly hands Yasashii the Bishounen Camera 
back* Hope yaz liked it, minna-san! Jaaaa! 
--Shinigami Baby =^_^=