A biker from Texas had gone on a ride to visit some friends in Boston. He was supposed to meet his friends at an up-scale bar where some local college kids also happened to hang out. When he pulled in, he had been on the road for a while and needed to use the restroom.
He noticed his friends had not arrived yet, so he asked one of the customers, "Hey buddy, where is the bathroom at?"
The customer sneered and said, "Here at Harvard, we don't end our sentences in prepositions."
The rider looked at the guy in the sweater vest and said, "Okay. Let me rephrase. Where is the bathroom at, A-hole?"
A cop is staking out the Killarney Hotel for bikers riding drunk. At closing time, he sees a biker stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb, and fumble for his keys for five minutes. When he finally gets on the bike, it takes him another five minutes to get the key in the ignition. Meanwhile, everybody else leaves the bar and rides off. When he finally pulls away, the cop is waiting for him, pulls him over, and gives him a Breathalyzer test. The test shows he has a blood alcohol level of 0.0. The cop says, "How is this possible?" The guy laughs and says, "Tonight I'm the designated decoy."
An old timer was riding down a desolate highway when his Harley broke down. Soon a fellow on a BMW pulled up next to him. "Is there anything I can help with?" the Beemer man asks. "Yeah, could I borrow a wrench?" the Harley rider asks. "Of course. What type and size do you need?" Beemer man asks, opening a sizeable tool kit.
"Don't matter a bit to me. I'm gonna use it fer a hammer anyway."
A drunk biker is riding through the city and his bike is weaving violently all over the road. An Irish cop pulls him over. The cop says to the biker, "Where have you been?" "I've been to the pub," slurs the biker. "Well," says the cop, "It looks like you've had quite a few." "I did all right," the biker says with a smile. "Did you know," says the cop, standing straight and folding his arms, "that a few intersections back, your wife fell off the bike?" "Oh, thank heavens" sighs the biker. "For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf."
A little old drunk man walked into a biker bar. He went straight up to the biggest, meanest looking biker in the place and said, "Hey Boy. I just drove past your granny's house and I saw her standing in the doorway naked." Everyone on the bar thought the little drunk was about to get beaten to a pulp but the biker just stared straight ahead without saying a word. Again, the old man taunted the biker: "That granny of yours sure is one mighty fine woman ain't she boy?" The others in the bar just knew that he was about to kill this little drunk guy but the biker continued to ignore him. Finally, the little old guy had to push it a little more. "Hey boy, your granny was looking so fine, I just went in and got me some of that stuff and it sure was good too." With that, the biker had enough. He jumped to his feet and shouted, "OK Grandpa, go home now. You are drunk enough." |
