Not because they do not taste good!  The shark is scared.  And who can blame him or her?  Take into consideration this fact, most of our elected leaders were lawyers.  And many of them go back into practice when they do not get re-elected, or they go into show business.  Actually, they were always in show business, as government and its antics are entertainment.

The almost human group, known as "Lawyers", are a group of over-educated, socially inept, unattractive, unhealthy creatures who are shunned because of their vocation by society in general. 

Are there any good ones, certainly.  Are there any honest ones? Certainly.  But not many.  Is it hard to find a good, honest lawyer?  Damn right it is.  Why?  Beause the overwhelming majority are not good lawyers nor are they honest.   The overwhelming majority went to law school to get rich.  That is their goal, their mantra, their raison d'etre.  And, you the client are there for them to feed on.   And, yes, I realize I am now comparing them to vampires.  For good reason, they make money off of someone else's misery and they enjoy it.  They would sell their mother or child if they could make enough money from the sale. 

Rarely do they ever pay their secretary or assistant enough for the labor, grief and just plain old misery they inflict on them.  They are penurious to the nth degree with their help, without which they could not exist. What is even more disgraceful is they will bill the client a far higher rate for that legal assistants work than the assistant will ever be paid.

Yet the manage to pay themselves well, give themselves every benefit and perk known to mankind, but it is also rare for them to extend that largesse to their employees. 

Many of these miserly lawyers choose to kept horrendous conditions in their offices that are unhealthy, unsafe, unclean, uncomfortable with old equipment, lack of enough equipment,  and just inexcusably crowded, cramped environments.  If only the health department, the fire department and OSHA checked out these offices, they would be cited, but shut down until the sweat shop conditions were corrected.  They certainly know better but they will not spend the money to correct a sweat shop environment unless they are forced to do so.

When you need a lawyer, search carefully, interview them and ask lots and lots of questions.  Here are a few things to look for.

LET ME COUNT THE WAYS:

One of the signposts that you are in the wrong office is, do they charge you, the client, for making copies of records?  Which they would have to do anyway.  It is a minor thing, but it is also one of the many ways the less scrupulous, greedy, avaricious grave robbing vultures make a profit.

Second, do they........to be continued.

Of course George W. is not. Nor, I believe was his dad.