Title: Real Life
Author: Cynthia Beckner
Disclaimer: I don't own them and I don't make any more off of this.
Notes: I have been working a lot and haven't been able to write so this is my dues for July 27 I believe. Also this doesn't have any specific character in mind.
Warnings: This is not beta read, but I think I got most of the mistakes. At least the spelling ones. Also this is kind of dark and depressing. Please send comments.
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When I was a kid I had imagined that I might someday be a cop and then again I had considered being a lot of things. I'm not sure there isn't a kid out there that dreams of being a cop at one point in time. It's that romantic notion of a man in blue coming to save the day. After all that was what happened on TV. I never could have imagined what it would really be like. I never considered having to stand over a fellow officers grave, a friends grave, and say goodbye because they were killed in the line of duty. After
all cops are the good guys and they are not suppose to die. TV doesn't make reality. You learn that as you get older, but part of the good guy, bad guy sticks with you and you think the world is wonderful and happy. Not ever pictures on the news, magazines, and newspapers could make me think different when I was little. Then the first time I watched a fellow cop die, a child crying over his dead parents, and the first time I saw what people are actually capable, helped change me views. On of the first runs that I handled right out of the academy was a domestic disturbance call. By the time we got there, it was all over. I never imagined that a husband could beat his wife to death and then kill his kids. That did a lot to open my eyes. However I still cringe at time when I know it's going to be bad. However that's life, and life can be cruel. Growing up I knew that the bad guys always lost and the good guys 
won. Never did it enter my head that it could go the other way to. On TV the good guys never die, but out on the streets it happens all the time. Last week I had to say goodbye to another friend. He just couldn't take it anymore and had eating his gun. I don't think he's the first to consider it, nor will he be the last. After all coming home to silence has left me contemplating it more then I would care to admit. I wonder is I will ever get to the point of actually doing it. I hope not. My friends would be telling me right know that I should be talking to a shrink. Unfortunately there is nothing that a shrink could do to help unless they know some way of making everything right in the world. However, this is real life, not some movie where the guy gets the girl and rides of into the sunset. Instead the bad guy is usual on the street before I can finish the paperwork. I wish I were still that kid that thought nothing bad could happen to those who were good. Then again, fantasies and dreams are shattered all the time by violence.

The End

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