Stinky Dogs!

A True Story

We just left the freeway, made a series of turns, and drove over a bridge when suddenly I cried out to my husband,

  Hey! Look George! A creek and there is water in it!

Really?

See for yourself.

Well I’ll be! Now that’s something you do not see everyday.

 “I’ll say. Water in the desert! Pull over! Let’s take the dogs down there for a swim. They will love it! Stop, stop, STOP ALREADY!”

“OKAY! I plan to! You know I like to make you happy.”

I gave my husband a big smile then grasped the door handle to brace myself. George pulled off the road like James Bond in a high-speed chase. Clouds of dust bellowed from  the tires as we sped down a dirt road passing a warning sign of some sort. Suddenly, he brought the Continental to a screeching halt. It was at the end of the road just inches before a steep incline. I let out a loud scream. George smiled and gave me his “what did I do innocent look”. He turned off the ignition and a wave of dust engulfed the car. “Well that was exciting. Do you enjoy scaring me half to death?

”He tried to muffle a desire to laugh when his muse got the better of him. He laughed light-heartily and covered his mouth with his hand. I was not amused. I gave George a searing look, opened my door in a huff and got out of the car. Immediately, Scarlet, our 9-year-old brown and white Cocker Spaniel jumped into the front seat and tumbled headfirst to the ground. The poor old dear has an inner ear problem that plays havoc with her ability to balance herself. George yelled, “Scarlet!”

But as usual, he was too late to stop her. She always jumps over the seat and escapes from the car before we can stop her. Scarlet righted herself and was half way down the hill before I could let Sparky and Sasha out of the car. She had a head start on the two big dogs. She scampered down the hill emitting a trail of dust from her short stubby legs. Not to be out done…Sparky and Sasha gave chase. George and I laughed.

“Look at those dogs! You would think that they have never seen water before.”

I commented. We put on our hats and walked down the hill hand and hand. We smiled at each other and looked at our dogs like proud parents. The creek I proudly discovered was outlined by lush green vegetation on both sides of its’ banks. It was like a paradise in the middle of the desert hidden away from everyone but us. Reeds grew with other plant life along its’ banks forming a barrier against intruders. This barrier, however, did not deter Scarlet from finding a way into the creek.

“Look George, Scarlet is already in the water swimming. She is so happy.”

“She sure is. Hard to believe that that dog once hated getting wet."

”“George, there seems to be a current. Scarlet better be careful or she will get swept down stream.”

 “You worry to much. Scarlet will be just fine.” George said. 

“This is really beautiful place! I wonder why no one else is down here?”

“Ouch! You got me.”

“Come on George get your butt down here.”

“I will get there when I get there. You are not wearing sandals. I have a million rocks attacking my feet!”

Scarlet swam happily around with her head floating on the surface of the water. Sparky, my three-year-old Labrador, finally found his way into the water. I watched him run out into the current, sniff the water then he headed back to dry land.

“That’s odd. I wonder why Sparky did that?”

“Did what?“ Oh, nothing.”

George came down and stood by me.

“What is that smell?” He asked.

“Oh, you smell it too? What is that? I think Sparky smells something too. He wouldn’t drink the water.”

About that time Sparky ran into the creek and lay down in a shallow end.

“Is it my imagination or does the creek smell like a sewer?”

“I think it smells like a sewer.”

He said. “Here I wanted the dogs to have a bath and look what I got them into!” I said with dread. Sasha made her way into the creek and ran up and down the stream for awhile flushing birds out of the bushes.

“Oh, God. Now Sasha is in the water!” George looked down stream, then up stream.

“It is a sewage treatment plant! I forgot there was one around here.” He said with alarm.“

Oh, great. Quick, get the dogs out of the water!” I screamed.

We called out to the dogs and they responded like children—they ignored us and kept playing in the water.“

Pee-u! Sparky! Scarlet! Sasha! Come here! Go bye-bye!”

“Oh, the smell. This is awful! Pee-u!”

We continued to call the dogs, but only Scarlet obeyed. Sparky and Sasha took off and ran up stream to discover the source of that wonderful smell they were playing in! They did too. Both of them went into the water chest deep and chased each other around. “Maybe if we go back to the car they will follow us.” I said. “It’s worth a try.” George said. We hurried up the hill, calling to the dogs. I walked passed a bush and my bat-like hearing caught the sound of a snake.

“Stop where you are George! Listen.”

“What is it?”

“Just listen. Hear that? It’s a rattlesnake! I think the snake is in that big bush just below us.”

I whispered.

“Are you sure?” George asked.

“No, but if I throw you into the bush I can find out for sure! OF COURSE, I AM SURE!”

George bent down picked up a large rock and threw it into the bush.

“What are you doing? Are you crazy?” I scolded.

I don’t hear anything now. George said.

I wonder why-- the snake is probably crawling up your leg!

After getting the dogs into the car we passed the sign we missed earlier.   Hazardous waste, no-fishing, swimming, etc.  We shut the doors, George started the car and the air conditioner.  We looked at each other and said, " Pee-u!"  The inside of the car smelled like a sewer treatment plant.  Down came the windows but that did not last long it was 105 degrees.  Up went the windows again, then we began to gag.  I found s tissue and covered my nose and mouth but it didn't help.  The smell penetrated everything! It was awful! Then the finger pointing started. You caused this, you didn't have to listen to me, you could have drove on, besides we both missed that big yellow warning sign.  

"Now what?"

"I don't know."

Do we drive around like this?

I don’t know, but I have to get some gas.

You got a gun in the trunk don't you?

Of course I do this is Arizona.

Then if you care for me at all you will shoot me.  I can't stand this.

I'm not going to shoot you, I love you.

A real man would.

Well this real man needs gas now help me look for a service station.

What about the dogs? They could get sick and die while you are pumping gas! 

It can't be helped.  Think of something.

I'm thinking, I'm thinking.

 George! Stop the car!  Drive in there! I yelled.

"C-l-e-v-e-r girl.  George commented.

I have a couple of dollars in my purse I’ll get the quarters, you get the dogs out of the car.

When I returned, George had tied the dogs up to the front bumper.  I inserted four quarters into the machine,

"What setting do you want?"

"Start with soap brush." George answered.

“I hear and I obey.” 

Pink soap oozed from the brush as George swabbed Starlet’s body.  She liked it…so did the other two dogs. The do-it-yourself-car-wash was working out great as a do-it-yourself dog wash. What a scream! People on the way to the change machine did double takes and laughed with amusement at the dogs and us. I think they laughed mostly at George’s creativity with the sudsy brush. He scalped the dogs into what looked like three fluffy sheep!  

“Okay, Cynthia switch to rinse.” George ordered.

“As you wish.” I answered.

After that, I turned the knob to spry wax. I think the spray wax will gave the dogs fur a nice shinny appearance.

The dogs were air dried and there bedding put into the trunk.  From the car wash, we drove over to Mrs. Naanes house (George’s mother) to shampoo her carpets for her. When we got there, we put the dogs in the backyard. Later when we were ready to leave we discovered that our nice clean dogs had rolled in the dirt!  They looked like lint balls with teeth. Oh, well dogs will be dogs! 

The End

Written By: Cynthia Ellis Martin

Date: June 26, 1999  

Copyright © 2001 by Visions West Inc. All rights reserved.

Revised: 17 Feb 2001 12:51:29 -0800.