A Dinning Adventure

"Hay, George!  It's my birthday!"

"So?"

"So, you get to walk the dogs this morning.  I'm a birthday girl, I don't have to do nothing."

"I can see where this is going, all right.  I'm getting up."

After George walked the dogs he made me breakfast then he sat in his computer chair and handed me a small oblong shape tin with a picture of Elvis on it.  I opened the lid, and looked inside for money, jewelry, stocks and bonds, but only found chocolates.  I looked at George and smiled slowly:

"Do I have to share these?"  (I was teasing)

"No you do not they are all ours".

"All twelve of them?  How kind of you.  I don't think I ever had a box of chocolates this size before, what's the catch?"

"I am watching your weight, you are on a diet."

"A diet!  On my birthday!  Are you for real?"

"I am only looking after your health."  

"Sounds like you are looking after your wallet."

"Okay cut to the chase, where's my present?"

George went to the closet and pulled out a Swiss arm (water-proof) backpack. 

"What is this? "

"Surprise!"

"Oh, this birthday just keeps getting better and better.  Look at the size of this thing!  I could carry a midget in here, why is it so big?"

"They make them that way so you can carry lots of stuff.  It will come in handy when we move to Colorado and start hiking.  Now look inside." 

"Hiking boots made by VasqueÒ oh you shouldn't have!  What's this-a walking stick?  It's aluminum and it's adjustable I like it.  I always wanted a walking stick or a thrashing stick!  Let me try it out on you. 

(George ran from the room laughing.)

"How on earth did he manage to find this stuff?"    I asked myself.

George came back into the room.

"Happy?  Do you like your presents?"

"You bet, thank you.  Can't wait to use them especially the stick.  Do I get a cake?"

"No.  It's fatting."

"But it's my birthday!  I always have cake on my birthday."

"I said, no and that's that."

"Oh, poo."  

  The Sushi Bar

"Where do you want to go to dinner?"

"I want to go to the Sushi Bar, ever been to one?"

"No, but I'm game.  And I just happen to know where one  is."

We drove to a Sushi Bar in Scottsdale and went inside. 

"Let's sit here.  This way we can see the samurai preparing the Sushi.  Remember to tip or they will back flip over the counter and that will be the end of us."

"What's all this stuff for?"  George asked.

"This is where the sauces go, chopsticks, washcloth for cleaning your hands or wiping your eyes after you eat Wasabi, also good to have on hand for wiping down the person next to you as you learn to use chop sticks."

"G-e-o-r-g-e!  Your not suppose to clean your face with it!  Good grief."

"Sorry (George laughs) what's this for?  Sacrifices?"

"Nice dodge.  This wooden platform is use for getting the servers attention.  Just hold it up like this and say more please.  Chopsticks are Japanese silverware or catapults if you please.  Chopsticks are used to put food into your mouth rice takes a long time to eat with chopsticks by the way.  With chopsticks, food can end up in one of three places: in your mouth, on the floor or in the lap of the person sitting next to you.  It is considered an insult to throw your food at people and to use silverware at a Japanese restaurant.  If you do, they laugh at you in the kitchen and call you dumb Americans and wonder how it is possible that someone like you won the war."

"Really?  How is that you know all about this?"

"I've been going to Sushi Bars for along time.  I had a good teacher, I also worked with Japanese at Kyocera and my friends there told me all about the do's and don'ts of oriental eating."  (I was teasing George)  

"Oh, I didn't know that.  So, how do you hold chopsticks?"

When George wasn't watching me I asked the man next to me how to hold the chopsticks correctly. 

"Enjoying Sushi with chopsticks can be a challenging experience not only for you, but for the persons seated next to you.  It's time to order."  I laughed.

George, took charge and before I knew it he was ordering food as if he had done it all of his life.  We ate a California roll, a Sunshine Roll (Salmon-Seaweed), Dynamite Scallops (hot), and a Crab Roll.  George's food went this way and that way, but eventually he got the hang of it.

"What's this green stuff?"  George asked.

"It's Wasabi, you mix a large amount of it in the soy sauce. Then you dip the sushi into it and eat."       

George did this, and then he gasped, coughed, turned red, had a hot flash and then water ran out of his nose and eyes.  He grabbed his washcloth and put it up to his face.

"Oh, my God!  You dirty rat!  You did that on purpose!"  He said in good humor.

"I'm afraid so.  Sorry about that, I got a mean streak in me."   I laughed.

"I'll get you for this some some place when you least expect it."

"I understand."

We continued to eat in silence, and then George started laughing.

"It was pretty funny."

"Yes, it was.  Do you forgive me?"  I asked innocently.

"No."  George laughed.

 "Well, that does it for me.  I couldn't eat another bite. How are you doing?"

"I'm full too.  Waitress, more ice tea please."

I sat back in my chair to relax, but that didn't last long.  A squadron of Japanese servers and worker-bees approached me on my blind side (just like them) and started singing:

"Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday Sin-chee-ah, happy birthday to you."

I was so embarrassed!  Yet, I loved it.  Now it felt like my birthday.  I gave my husband a kiss, and thanked everyone.  I was given a scoop of deep fried ice cream with a candle in it.  I made a wish and blew out the candle.  George and I shared the dessert.

"Thank you for the nice birthday."

"Thank you for introducing me to Sushi and W-a-s-a-b-i."

"Gee are you ever going to let that go?  I'm sorry.  I suppose (pause) I won't be getting a birthday cake."  

"I suppose right."

"Well, it was worth it, you should have seen your face, a Kodak moment if ever there was one."  I laughed.

"I love you."

"I love you too-even your mean streak."  

The End

Written by: Cynthia Ellis Martin   Date:  05-26-1999

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Last Updated: 03/14/02