Dear Santa,

You must be surprised that I'm writing to you
today, the 26th of December. Well, I would very much
like to clear up certain things that have occurred
since the beginning of the month, when, filled with
illusion, I wrote you my letter.

I asked for a bicycle, an electric train set, a
pair of roller blades, and a football uniform. I
destroyed my brain studying the whole year. Not only
was I the first in my class, but I had the best grades
in the whole school.

I'm not going to lie to you, there was no one in my
entire neighbourhood that behaved better than me, with
my parents, my brothers, my friends, and with my
neighbours. I would go on errands, and even help the
elderly cross the street. There was virtually nothing
within reach that I would not do for humanity.

What balls do you have leaving me a fucking yo-yo,
a stupid whistle and a pair of socks. What the fuck
were you thinking, you fat son of a bitch, that you've
taken me for a sucker the whole fucking year to come
out with some shit like this under the tree.

As if you hadn't fucked me enough, you gave that
little faggot across the street so many toys that he
can't even walk into his house. Please don't let me
see you trying to fit your big fat arse down my
chimney next year.

I'll fuck you up. I'll throw rocks at those stupid
reindeer and scare them away so you'll have to walk
back to the fucking North Pole, just like what I have
to do now since you didn't get me that fucking bike.

FUCK YOU SANTA. Next year you'll find out how bad I
can be, you FAT-SON-OF-A-BITCH.

Sincerely,
Little Johnny
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