(As seen in my livejournal on 4-29-03)
THEY HAVE NO REAL OPINIONS OF THEIR OWN. They are a conglomeration of every man they've ever known. And, if they do have real opinions you'll sure as hell never hear them because they're afraid of how it might reflect on them to *gasp* disagree with their boyfriend. They're so insecure that they can not and, will not show their true face (metaphorically and, actually) in fear that they will be without a man's attention.
Someone once told me that girls who say that men make better friends only say so because having guy friends means that you have someone constantly complimenting you, fawning over you, doing for you. THAT IS SUCH BULLSHIT. 98% of my friends are men. Not because I just can not do without male attention. But, because guys are not full of shit. They are honest and, trustworthy and, fun to be around. They have some degree of integrity that women seem to be born without. But, now that I think on it this person was probably right. Not in my case but, in general. I can think of a shining example of how he was correct in one of my chick friends. She thinks that guys are such great friends but, she likes the attention men give her. Here is the dividing line between acceptable girls and, unacceptable girls, forgive me for using myself as an example. Her idea of "hanging out" with her guy friends is dressing in tight clothes and, taking them to a bar with her so that they can buy her frilly pink drinks all night. My idea of hanging out is splitting a twelve pack and, staying up all night playing video games, most likely in my flannel pajama pants and, an old stained sweatshirt. And, my chick friends are limited to those whom I could call up and, say "we're going to chug beer and, play video games tonight, are you in?" With exception of the one example I used above.
I can't count the number of times she's said to me "So...you're just going to sit around and, play cards with Scott and, Jason tonight?...fun." My response: "So, you're just going to go to a bar and, whore yourself out tonight? She continually whines to me how she can not find a boyfriend. I know several great guys who would stand on their head, naked, in the middle of a busy intersection, to go out with her. But, they wouldn't raise her social status. So, she goes to bars every weekend meets these god awful frat boys, has sex with them after knowing them for less than 12 hours and, wonders why they never call her again. And, this pisses me off. Because, deep down, she is a really cool girl. I wouldn't be friends with her if she wasn't. But, she doesn't allow many people to see the real her. By the time she is close enough with a guy to let him see her the way she really is she claims that "they're too good a friend" to date. What she means is "he's seen me in the morning with no make up and, my glasses on".
Oh god, and don't ever tell a woman a secret. If you tell a girl something and, she thinks that she can use it against you for her own gain, I absolutely guarantee you she will, without a second of hesitation. Women have no souls. They have no sense of honor. They are shameless. And, it's sick. Because afterwards when you confront them about it, they will bat their eyelashes, or worse, make a few tears spill out and, claim that they were just trying to "help" you, or that they only told one person and, that person promised not to say anything (there by relocating blame) or that you never told them not to say anything in the first place. And, they're so gosh darn pretty and weak that you'll fuckin fall for it!!! WHERE WILL THEY BE WHEN THEIR BEAUTY FADES?? What will they have left to them when their breasts sag and, no ammount of make up will cover up the age lines around their mouths and eyes caused by years of keeping a sour, calculating expression on their faces? All they will have to fill their empty existance is a cold, bitter heart and, memories of how much better their life was when they could get by on beauty alone.
I've been hated by a lot of girls in my relatively short existance. I am a threat. Because I speak only brutal truth. Because I have a brain and, humour and, dignity. Because I can be trusted and, I'm fiercely loyal. And, somedays I fool myself into believing that I would trade all of that to be empty-headed and, classically "pretty". But, fuck that. I have people who like being around me, who know they can trust me. I know what it is to love and, be loved in return, to know that someone loves me even at my ugliest, saddest moments. I know what love and, friendship really means. And, that is worth so much more. I'll still be pretty when I'm old. Because I didn't waste being young in stupid competition, selling out my friends for what ammounts to 5 minutes of attention from a guy that I don't even truly like. I will never have regrets that no one ever knew me. Because I'm not afraid to let the right people in. Because as self concious as I can be, I let people take me or leave me for who I am, who I really am, not the mask that I paint on. And, that makes all the difference.
