CWF Armageddon

The Pond at Anaheim, Anaheim, CA.

(Bishop Hell sits in a chair inside a dark room and reads from the chapter of Revelations in a large King James version of the Bible.)

BH: "And there fell upon men a great hail out of heaven, every stone about the weight of a talent: and men blashemed God because of the plague of the hail; for the plague thereof was exceedingly great. (Closes the book) Welcome to Armageddon. (Laughs maniacally as the scene fades into darkness.)

(A montage of video clips featuring Minister Massacre, Dead Drunk Dan Williams, Archbishop Apocalypse, "Deadwire" Ken Sparks, Cyclone, Brett "the Legend" Logan and Rabbi Dreidel Thief play to "End of the World" by R.E.M. At the end, an atomic explosion is shown and the scene fades to inside the Pond, where pyrotechnic explosions and fireworks shoot towards the ceiling while "The Beautiful People" by Marilyn Manson plays.)

Prez: Welcome ladies and gentlemen to CWF Armageddon. I'm President Pat O' Sullivan. Sitting next to me is CWF Commissioner Matt Meyer. Ted Randy is once again on vacation and the Sock is currently in the wash.
Tonight, former Heavy Metal Champion Dead Drunk Dan Williams takes on CWF champion Minister Massacre. Dan will bring a "man from the past" to be in his corner. We also to expect the debut of CWF newcomer Mr. Stone. Meyer?

Commish: Thanks O'Sullivan. Also tonight, Massacre and returning Church member Archbishop Apocalypse will take on the tag team champions, Cyclone and Brett Logan. Cyclone will face People's champion "Deadwire" Ken Sparks in a last challenge match and Heavy Metal champion "Iceman" Steve Johnson will defend against the Assassin in a Chamber of Death match. Let's go to ringside with our first match. (The bell rings)

Mr. Stone versus Jay Bronie

Commish: Jay Bronie is in for a treat tonight, he's the first to take on Mr. Stone, who seems to object to the foul language of some of the members of our CWF roster.

Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Currently in the ring from the jabronie capital of the world, Jay Bronie! (The crowd does not even move)

Prez: A warm response for professional wrestling's answer to the Mendoza line. ("Did I Do It" by Mystikal plays. Mr. Stone comes from backstage.)

Announcer: And his opponent, from Raleigh, North Carolina, standing at 6'3" and weighing 230 lbs., accompanied to ringside by his manager "The Stuff," Mr. STONE! (Mr. Stone enters the ring. The bell rings to start the match)

Commish: And we're underway here at Armageddon. Stone and JB in an elbow and collar hookup, JB with the early advantage, he whips Stone to the ropes and falls victim to a shoulderblock. JB is up and off the ropes, Stone with a hard clothesline.

Prez: You have to like the new blood the CWF has gotten. Lethal Assassin, Pain, Archbishop Apocalypse, Mr. Stone. Stone with a powerbomb. He has the pin, but lets go and heads to the top rope.

Commish: Stone with a top rope moonsault. Wow. That was damn impressive. Looks like he's not going to waste any time finishing off JB and he's signaling for the Stone Driver. He's got him locked for that butterfly suplex and hits it. Here's the pin.

Ref: 1. . . . . . . . .2. . . . . . . . . .3! (The bell rings)

Announcer: The winner of the match as a result of pinfall, MR. STONE!!!

Prez: Impressive showing by the rookie from Raleigh. Next, as a last minute replacement for the Notorious S.O.B. who's in contract negotiations with us, we have another match from CWF rookie, Pain. But before that, our own Jeff Diamond is backstage with Rabbi Dreidel Thief. (The camera shifts to backstage)

JD: RDT, you've been out of the spotlight the past couple of weeks, any comments?

RDT: I'm tired Diamond and if you had nuts as EXTREMELY LARGE as mine, you'd have a helluva time lugging them around everywhere you go. As you can see (looks at Fire and Brimstone), I've been "doing" other things a little more important than the Legend Brett Logan. Who started calling you a Legend anyway? Was it the two-member Brett Logan fan club composed of your fat ass mother? The status of a legend isn't asked for, it's thrust upon you, and tonight, I'm going to thrust my size 13 boot into your scrotum, yank off your tiny yin-yang and hang it from my El Dorado next to my fuzzy dice. (RDT walks off)

JD: OK. Back to you guys at ringside.

Rabbi Dreidel Thief versus Brett "The Legend" Logan in a "Loser Leaves Town" match

("Ballbreaker" by AC/DC plays and Magnus Pelf walks from backstage. The crowd boos him loudly and starts a chant of "Magnus sucks.")

MP: (Yells) That's right. I suck so well all of your girlfriends, wives and daughters have my office number on speed dial. And if you don't shut up, I'll pull Monica Lewinsky out of Jenny Craig and have her do a striptease at our next pay-per-view as the main event.

(The crowd boos, then quiets down)

Tonight, is a sad moment, for it is my last event as head booker for the Championship Wrestling Federation. (A deafening cheer resounds throughout the Pond)
But before I go, a few matches will be changed this evening. RDT versus Logan will now be a loser leaves town match. Whoever loses, must leave the CWF FOR LIFE.
The winner of the tag team title match will face a team of my choice as the main event at Uncensored. That team will be revealed tomorrow morning before my resignation becomes effective. And in the title match between Minister Massacre and Triple-D, since the champ did not put up a stiop of his own to match DDD's, the belt can change hands on disqualification. Have fun and keep my insurance rates down. Start the damn match.

Prez: Wow, Magnus Pelf is leaving. I know of at least 10 wrestlers who will party in the streets of Anaheim tonight.

("Chocolate Salty Balls (P.S. I Love You) by Chef begins to play. The crowd sings along and RDT comes out with Fire and Brimstone. They receive a loud pop.)

Commish: A great crowd response for the Rabbi and his scantily clad compadres. Or, should I say a great crowd response for RDT's managers?

Prez: I know who I'm cheering for, and unless RDT has breasts, I know who the crowd is cheering for too.

Anouncer: This following match is for one fall first making his way down the aisle from Crown Heights, NY, standing 6'5" and weighing 295 lbs, accompanied by Fire and Brimstone, Rabbi Dreidel Thief!!! (RDT gets a mic)

RDT: (in a bad Scott Hall accent) Hey yo. We're taking a little survey to see if you're with us or against us. Now, are you here to see the. . . . . .CWF? (The crowd cheers) Or, are you here because you're down with (the crowd chants R! D! T!) Survey says? One more for the Jewish guy. Logan, get out here so I can kick your ass sideways. (Throws mic into the crowd)

Announcer: Now approaching ringside from Parts Unknown, at a height of 6'6" and weighing 256 lbs, Brett "the Legend" Logan!!! (Logan runs to ringside and does a baseball slide under the ropes. The bell rings,)

Commish: Logan attacks RDT right away with a series of punches. Logan now with a series of three kicks to the back and stomach of the Rabbi. Logan now hits a tornado ddt!

Prez: Cover 1....2...and a kick out.

Commish: Logan with a scoop slam and now an atomic leg drop.

Prez: Cover 1...2.. and RDT hits the ropes to break the count. Logan clearly has the advantage tonight.

Commish: Logan picks RDT up and sets him up for a piledriver...no its a
powerbomb and he pulls him up to drop him again! Shades of Chris Jericho.

Prez: Logan picks RDT up again and sits him on the bottom rope standing up. Logan hooks on a Outsider's edge. What a crucifix powerbomb!

Prez: SLogan picks RDT up and hits the Smackdown, a modified Rock Bottom. I don't think RDT will get up from this one, no matter how big his nuts are.

Ref: 1........2...........3 (He signals for the bell and it rings.)

Announcer: The winner of the match, Brett "the Legend" Logan!!!

Commish: Logan is your winner and RDT will be forced to leave the CWF. He's still down and it looks like Fire and Brimstone are going to get in and help him out.

(Fire and Brimestone climb up onto the ring and remove their tops to flash Logan. Logan can't keep his eyes off them.)

Prez: (staring) Just look at Logan. You'd think he's never seen two pairs of the greatest tits God ever created before. (The crowd gives a loud pop and the Demonic Deacon runs down to ringside and slides something in the ring, then leaves. RDT grabs it and gets up.)

Commish: The Deacon just slid something into the ring and RDT is up. It's. . .a candleabra? What the hell? And Logan is losing interest because Fire and Brimstone are buttoning up.

(Logan turns around and RDT low blows him with the candleabra, then clocks him over the head. He backs over to the ropes and gives the Church's Legdrop. The crowd starts a chant of RDT. The three leave)

Prez: Well, we say goodbye to the Rabbi, which shouldn't be hard for him since he hasn't really been around much. I'm sure Logan is happy to see him go too.

Commish: Well, let's go to the side of the arena, where the Chamber of Death, which is actually a UFC Lion's Den with walls of barbed wire, is set up for our Heavy Metal match between champion Steve Johnson and challenger the Assassin. Meanwhile, the crew here at the sold out Pond will set up the steel cell for our tag team title match, scheduled next.

The Assassin versus Steve "Iceman" Johnson in a "Chamber of Death" match

( "Dead Body Man" by ICP plays. Assassin walks out with a trenchcoat on and walks to the chamber. He slowly enters it and has a grin on his face. )

Announcer: The following scheduled match is for the CWF Heavy Metal championship. Currently in the ring, from Chicago Illinois, at a height of 6'8" and weighing 283 lbs, the Assassin!!!

("Animal" by Pearl Jam plays. Steve Johnson runs into the ring and the ref closes the barbed wire door to the chamber. The bell rings.)

Commish: Let's remind the fans that the only way to win this match is by submission or clearly knocking your opponent out. So Assassin, whose end move the Assassination is a submission hold, might have the edge here.
Prez: Iceman starts things off with a headbutt and then goes for a belly to belly suplex. Assassin is the bigger of the two but Johnson is no weakling. Assassin is up and grabs Johnson by the neck with both hands. He hoists Steve way up, and throws him down hard onto the floor, which has absolutely no give to it.

Commish: Assassin walks around the ring, like an animal hunting his prey. Assassin gives Johnson a BIG boot. Johnson must feel like he was hit by a mack truck. What impact that had! Johnson slowly stirs around, Assassin gives him a hangman's neckbreaker.

Prez: Iceman is down and Assassin gives him a series of three elbows to the chest in a row. Now Assassin shoots Iceman into the barbed wire, but Iceman reverses it and the Assassin gets cut bloody and goes down in a heap. He goes for a headbutt, but Assassin moves. So Iceman didn't do himself much good either because he went down too.

Commish: Both guys struggle to get to their feet. Jawbreaker from Johnson. Assassin stumbles backwards. Iceman gives Assassin a chop to the chest, not much effect. Now Assassin backs Steve into a the cage, ouch. Now that is what I call a chop!! The sweat and blood on Steve's chest is now in the drinks of everyone in the first row.

Prez: Assassin throws Steve into the cage and blasts him with a clothesline from behind. But Assassin no sells it and gives him a piledriver. It looks like the Assassin may have not gotten Steve up high enough because he's cluthing his neck. Then again, Steve is known for faking injuries to get the upper hand.

Commish: Steve is in pain, Assassin has been working on that neck for a while now. Assassin goes for a powerbomb and gets it. Total control by the Assassin. Assassin is on the verge of winning some gold here tonight. Iceman is up and gives Assassin a gut wrench suplex. Now Steve gives Assassin a backbreaker. Iceman has really gotten up and caught a second wind.

Prez: Steve sets up Assassin for a DDT but Assassin powers out of it. Now Iceman hits a right hand. He puts Assassin in suplex position and attempts a suplex but Assassin counters with a brainbuster on the hard surface and Steve's legs are caught in the barbed wire and he can't move. You usually don't see technical moves in these kinds of matches, but Assassin has pulled off quite a few. Steve is clutching his neck and I don't think he's faking this time.

Commish: And Assassin locks in the Assassination. Steve is throwing his arms around and doing everything he can to escape. But its not working. HE's tapping!!!!!! Oh my God, I think that's the first time I've ever seen Steve Johnson tap. We have a new Heavy Metal champion!

Prez: Steve must have been in immense pain to tap, and I mean IMMENSE. He's a tough s.o.b.

Annoucer: Your winner, and NEW CWF Heavy Metal champion, Assassin. (The ref opens the door and hands the Assassin the belt. Paramedics rush into the chamber and immobilize Steve's neck before taking him out on a stretcher.)

Commish: I don't imagine this is too serious because Steve is moving his arms and legs, so he's not paralyzed thank God. I'm sure we'll here more about his condition as the night progresses.

Prez: Our tag team title match is next and you've got to wonder if Cyclone and Logan can agree enough to retain against the powerful team of world champion Minister Massacre and newly rejoining Church member Archbishop Apocalypse.

Archbishop Apocalypse and Minister Massacre versus Cyclone and Brett "the Legend" Logan for the CWF Tag Team Titles.

Annoucer: The following bout is one fall and is inside a cell for the CWF Tag Team Titles.
("Overture of the Rebel Angels" by Glenn Danzig plays. Minister Massacre and Archbishop Apocalypse come down to ringside and enter the cage.)
Now coming down the aisle, representing the Church, the team of Minister Massacre and Archbishop Apocalypse!!

("I Wanna Fly Away" by Lenny Kravitz plays. Logan and Cyclone make their way to ringside.)

Announcer: And the champions, the team of Brett Logan and Cyclone!! (They enter the ring and the cell starts to descend. The bell rings)

Commish: This looks to be a great match-up. The cell is locked. Last week, Cyclone was destroyed by this team fighting on his own and by all rights they should be wearing the gold. However the belts were returned back to Cyclone and Logan. Here we go, MM and Cyclone will start things off, collar and elbow tie up. MM gets the better of it with a hip toss on Cyclone.

Prez: Actually I gave them back the belts because "The Bishop" was not clear.

Commish: Uh huh.

Prez: Anyway Massacre gets a snap mare on Cyclone, then goes into a chin lock. Massacre is grinding it in, Cyclone is clenching is teeth in pain. Massacre is smiling! What a Sadist, hey come on ref, now he's just choking him!

Commish: Massacre releases it and tags in The Bishop.

Prez: The ARCH Bishop.

Commish: AA takes Cyclone up, then puts him down in a jackhammer suplex. AA now stomps on Cyclone. He kicks Cyclone all the way to his corner, and allows him to make the tag. Logan is in. Logan and AA exchange right hands in the middle of the ring. Neither man is giving up in inch. Now Logan ducks and gives a boot to the midsection. He slaps a DDT on AA. Cover!

1.......2...

Prez: Kickout. Logan is up and gives AA a swinging neckbreaker. Logan goes outside and climbs the ropes. He goes for an elbow drop and connects. He gets a cover.

1.......2..

Commish: Now Logan goes for a suplex, but AA reverses it and suplexs Logan. He is up and tags Massacre. Massacre gives Logan a gorilla press slam followed by a boot to the face. In comes Cyclone, out goes Cyclone! Massacre just throw in over the top rope and he's sandwiched between the cell and the ring. Not much room out there but there is a little space between the ring and cell. Logan is up and rolls up MM but before the one count MM is out.

Prez: MM gets a jawbreaker on Logan. Now he takes Logan's arm and rams in into the turnbuckle. Tag to AA. AA is in and gives Logan a powerbomb. Logan is in pain. AA is smiling and takes a break to see if Cyclone is up, Logan gets a side russian leg sweep.

Commish: Cyclone is up and Logan tags him in. Cyclone gives MM a side walk slam and MM takes a powder outside. Cyclone gives AA a fame-asser. AA is really dazed now. Cyclone signals for Logan to go upstairs. Logan climbs and waits on the top rope.

Prez: Cyclone sets up AA for a powerbomb but AA gets a back body drop. Cyclone quickly back up and goes for a clothesline but AA side steps and Cyclone runs into the turnbuckle knocking Logan to the floor. Massacre is back in and gets a kick to the midsection, and he sets up Cyclone in pump-handle position. The Bloody Benediction! He's got it!

Commish: Now he goes outside, picks Cyclone up and throws him in the ring. AA gets the Bow Before God locked on, and there's no way out of this massive bearhug. Cyclone is out! (The bell rings)

Annoucers: Ladies and Gentlemen, your winners...and NEW CWF Tag team champions, Minister Massacre and Archbishop Apocolypse!!!

Commish: We'll, we have new tag champs, great match. AA and the Minister prove last week was no fluke and put an end to the bickering between Cyclone and Logan by taking the straps. Looks like Logan's taking a few stomps at Cyclone before leaving.

Cyclone versus "Deadwire" Ken Sparks in a "Last Challenge" ladder match for the CWF People's Title

Prez: The action is non-stop here at the sold out Pond at Anaheim for CWF Armageddon. Our next match is a last challenge ladder match for the CWF People's Title. Whoever ends up champ never has to face the challenger again as long as he is champ.

Announcer: The following match is scheduled for one fall with a time limit of 20 minutes and is for the CWF People's Championship.

("More Human than Human" by White Zombie plays and the lights go out. Fireworks go off as Cyclone and Jenna walk out of the entrance way. The fans give cyclone a pretty good pop as he steps into the ring. The fans than go wild as Jenna waves at the stands. Cyclone steps in and gets ready)

Commish: Well as we wait for the champ, they are setting up the
ladder in the ring.

(“Calling All Stations” by Genesis blasts over the pa as “Deadwire” Ken Sparks steps out of the entrance way. The fans give him a mild pop as he steps in the ring and gets ready for the match)

Prez: This match will be a great one, and we could possibly see a new Peoples Champ.

Commish: Yes anything can happen! (The bell rings)

Prez: And there is the bell, this match is underway. Deadwire starts off with a kick to the midsection and a ddt! Cyclone gets immediately up and nails DW in the gut. He puts his head between his legs and does a monster piledriver!

Commish: DW is on the ground holding his head, that had to hurt! Cyclone picks DW up by his hair and gives him a few punches to the forehead! Cyclone whips him against the ropes and gives him a clothesline.

Prez: DW slowy gets up as Cyclone climbs the turnbuckle. Cyclone off the top rope and he nails DW with a clothesline off the top ropes.

Commish: DW again is slow to get up and Cyclone has the major advantage! Cyclone whips DW against the ropes again but DW counters and comes back with a clothesline of his own.

Prez: Cyclone again is up immediately but he takes a few punches from DW and another short arm clothesline.

Commish: DW pulls cyclone up by his hair and goes against the ropes and does a third clothesline. What is his strategy?

Prez: I dont know Commissioner Meyer but whatever it is its not working. Cyclone up and he nails DW in the face. DW comes back with a forearm to the face and he whips him into the corner.

Commish: DW starts to knee Cyclone in the corner and the ref behind him
stops him. DW is turned around talking to the ref and Cyclone gives DW a low blow while his back was turned! DW is really hurting!

Prez: Cyclone climbs to the second rope on the turnbuckle and does a
clothlesine off the middle rope. He starts to climb the ladder.

Commsih: Hes starting up the ladder and hes up to the second rung but DW is up. DW gives Cyclone a low blow and Cyclone falls of the ladder.

Prez: Cyclone and DW are really hurting and but there both getting up.

Commish: DW gives cyclone a ddt! but Cyclone gets up and counters with a body slam. Cyclone is standing and DW gives him a low blow.

Commish: DW may have gave Cyclone a low blow but hes down also. Both men down at the moment. The ref starts to do a manditory 10 count.

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Prez: DW slowy stands up as Cyclone does also. They both lunge at each other and they collide and both go down again.

Commish: The ref starts another manditory 10 count but DW gets up before he can start. DW walks over to Cyclone and does an ankle lock on him.

Prez: DW lets go of the Ankle Lock due to the fact this match cant be won by submission. He pulls Cyclone up and throws Cyclone into the ladder knocking it over. Cyclone is out cold!

Commish: DW is slowly walking over to the ladder and hes trying to set it up right under the belt. Hes got it setup and hes climbing the ladder. Cyclone slowly stands up and grabs DW by his pants as he has his hands right under the belt, he was so close.

Prez: Cyclone throws DW off the ladder but doesnt climb it himself. Instead he walks over to DW and decides to give him some more punishment.

Commish: Cyclone picks DW up by his hair and throws him into the corner. He gives DW a boot to the face and hes holding it there. The ref is trying to get Cyclone to stop but he refuses to.

Prez: Cyclone whips DW to the other turnbuckle and he calls for a splash. He runs and DW moves out of the way and Cyclone his the turnbuckle and falls to the ground as does DW!

Commish: The ref again is starting a manditory 10 count, I dont know why
though!?

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Prez: DW slowy stands up and the ref stops the 10 count. Cyclone is now up too and they go at it exchanging punches!

Commish: Cyclone punches DW and throws him into the corner and starts to give him a series of punches. The ref is trying to stop him again and Cyclone
turns around and yells at him and shoves the ref back.

Prez: The ref stumbles to the other corner. DW kicks Cyclone in the stomach and whips Cyclone to the other ropes and Cyclone hits the ref. Now DW does a splash on cyclone on the ref. The ref is out cold.

Commish: Cyclone counters and throws DW through the ropes to the outside. Cyclone fallows him!

Prez: Cyclone is looking for a weapon and he finds a chair and nails DW in the head with it. Cyclone sits it down and starts to give a series of punches to DW.

Commish: DW counters and gives Cyclone a series of punches of his own! DW tries to whip Cyclone against the guard rail but Cyclone reverses and throws DW against the Guard Rail!

Prez: Cyclone picks up the chair and tosses it in the ring and pushes DW back into the ring also.

Commish: Cyclone picks up the chair but DW nails Cyclone in the gut and he sits it down accidently opening it up!

Prez: Cyclone does a massive choke slam to DW and he is out cold. Cyclone is climbing the ladder! Cyclone falls off and has to start back. DW slowly gets up as Cyclone is at the top. Cyclone is reaching for the title but DW has him by the leg! He's so close!

Commish: DW is pulling as hard as he can and Cyclone falls to his feed right beside the chair! ELECTRIC CHAIR! Bulldog on the chair and Cyclone is out cold! can DW take advantage.

Prez: The ref is starting to get back up but hes staggering and he has no idea where he is.

Commish: DW is slowly climbing the ladder, hes almost there. Wait here
comes Donald McRonald. He's down to the ring and inside it, but too late! DW has the belt! The match is over (The bell rings)

Announcer: The winner and still Peoples Champion! “DEADWIRE” KEN SPARKS!!!

Prez: McRonald is pulling DW down the rungs of the ladder and ooooh!!
Clown Drop and he is out! Cyclone is up and he and McRonald are double
teaming DW. DW is barely conscious as Mcron and Cyclone do a double suplex!

Commish: Here comes the Assassin! Hes down to the ring and he just nailed Cyclone, and now hes going after Mcron. Cyclone and DW are going at it! The Assassin and Mcronald. are going at it , its total Chaos!

Prez: And there is Brett Logan! Hes in the ring and he's got a chair. Hes
walking over torwards The Assassin and Mcrona;d! Hes gonna hit McRonald, NO! He just nailed the Assassin! Does he know the Assassin helped DW!

Commish: I dont know but Brett Logan is beating the hell out of the Assassin with that chair
and McRonald helps him! Cyclone and DW are still going at it. Here comes security! Its about damn time!

Prez: Security is breaking this up and DW and The Assassin are on the
outside of the ring as Cyclone and Mcron are on the entrance along with Logan. I dont think Logan knows what he's done. He jumps out of the ring as DW and the Assassin walk away. I dont think DW knows whats going on!

Commish: DW and Assassin are gone as Logan is following them to the back, but he turns around and points at Cyclone, his former tag partner. Now he walks off as Mcronald and Cyclone follow.

Prez: Well, our championship match is next and fans are on their feet waiting for the main event to begin. This should bring to a close the debate whether or not Minister Massacre is a worthy champion and indeed if DDD is over the hill and past his prime. Let's go backstage with Jeff Diamond to the champion.

(Three hearses pull up to the back entrance of the Pond. Minister Massacre waves them to a spot, then walks past the cameras, saying nothing)

JD: Looks like the champ and tag team champion has nothing to say. I have no idea where these caskets are going or what they're for, but I'll assume they have something to do with the match. Back to you guys at ringside.

Minister Massacre versus Triple D for the CWF championship

Prez: Let me remind you folks that if Triple-D loses, he has to retire, but Minister Massacre can lose the title by DQ. Let's go to ringside.

(The lights go out, and two spotlights, yellow and violet, strafe the crowd. A bell tolls three times, marking the beginning of "For Whom The Bell Tolls" by Metallica. The song cuts in, and there is a shot of yellow pyros from next to the entrance ramp. "Dead Drunk" Dan Williams steps out from behind the apron, with his lips frozen, and eyes locked on the ring. He has on his black trenchcoat, and black boots.)

Announcer: Introducing first, the challenger, from the stable of DTA, Dead Drunk Dan Williams!!

Commish: Not a great reaction for the former Heavy Metal champion, looks like he doesn't care much either.

(Dan stops next to the ring, where he takes off his trenchcoat, and leaves it on the floor, next to the steel steps. He is dressed in black pants, and an old faded "Triple D" tee from the PWF. The music stops, and the lights come back on. Then, "Welcome Home (Sanitarium)" by Metallica plays. Doomer steps out
onto the ramp, and walks down to the ring. The crowd is confused.)

Announcer: And now, introducing the challenger's special enforcer, Doomer!!!!!!! (Doomer comes down to ringside and DDD gets a mic)

DDD: Massacre, I know you're watching backstage and I know you're shocked that I brought back the man who first handed your your ass. Now, it's time for me to do the same. (Puts the mic down)

(The lights dim, then red light come on at the ring entrance. "Overture of the Rebel Angels" plays and Minister Massacre steps from backstage in minister's robes. The Black Widow joins him. They hang out their arms and blood drizzles down on them from sprinklers above. Pyros go off as they come to ringside.)

Announcer: And his opponent, from Tempe, Arizona, standing 6'6" and weighing 310 lbs, escorted to the ring by his manager, the Black Widow, the CWF champion, Minister Massacre!!!

(MM comes down to ringside and takes off his robes. He grabs a mic before entering the ring.)

MM: I knew you had something up your sleeve Dan, so I brought an enforcer of my own. You say Doomer handed me my ass, well Doomer may remember this man as the man who nearly handed him his life. C'mon out.

Prez: Oh, it can't be him.

Commish: Who?

("O, Fortuna" by Carl Orff plays. Murder One steps out from the ring entrance to a huge crowd pop. He comes to the ring ramp and DDD and Doomer are shocked. He has a mic)

M1: Now, I made a promise that I would not come back unless my partner was able to stand beside me. So Johnny, come on out.

("Mars, the Bringer of War" by Gustav Holst plays and Black Reign comes out on metal crutches. He stands by M1 and a huge pyro display goes off. M1 stands in the corner of MM and BR walks over to the announcer's table and grabs a headset. The bell rings.)

Prez: And the noise in here is deafening as the champion and the challenger size each other up. What a return for Doomer and especially, the three time CWF tag champions Murder One and Black Reign. Welcome back Reign.

BR: It's good to be here O'Sullivan to see my friend Massacre kick the sh** out of DDD. I can't tell you how many times I wanted to take that damn tomahawk and shove it up his ass like a pipe cleaner.

Commish: For thise of you who don't know, DDD went a little wild in his previous years and went on a winning streak by low blowing people with his tomahawk. How many times did you get hit Reign?

BR: Who cares. Pay attention to the damn match.

Prez: MM with the early advantage. He's behind DDD and hits a curtain call, followed with a armbar submission. DDD is two close to the ropes and Massacre has to break the hold.

BR: DDD with a questionably low hit to the gut of the champ, follows with a cradle suplex pin combo, Massacre kicks out after one.

Prez: Good calls Reign, you ever do this before?

BR: I couldn't learn doing what you do from playing WWF Attitude.

Commish: Anyway, the pair trade blows and DDD sets MM up for a suplex, MM reverses into a suplex, holds on, hits another, then finishes it with a snap suplex. Nice showing by the champ.

Prez: It took some out of both men, as they are slow getting up. Dan hits a drop toe hold on MM, turns it into an anklelock submission. MM isn't tapping, but he's in pain. M1 is slapping the mat and Dooomer is getting annoyed.

BR: Looks like Dan will try something else and puts MM in a camel clutch. MM lifts DDD up and falls backward, bridging into a pin combo, DDD kicks out after one and a half. Look closely, we trained him

Commish: DDD with a clothesline attempt, MM ducks, then hits his own clothesline, follows with an elbow, but DDD moves. DDD with a splash attempt, MM moves. MM is up and whips DDD to the corner turnbuckle, DDDreverses it and the ref gets caught. Things could get interesting now.

Prez: MM hits Dan with a standing dropkick, then whips him to the buckle near M1. M1's arm was in the way and it caught Dan in the back. Doomer looks like he thinks M1 was interfering and he's coming in the ring and so is M1. (BR gets up and walks to the side of the ring) Where is he going?

Commish: Who knows? Doomer goes for a bearhug, but M1 reverses it into a belly-to-belly suplex. He gets up Doomer, whips him to the ropes. (BR hits him on the head with one of his steell crutches.) Oh my God, Black Reign just clocked Doomer with one of those crutches. Now he's out and DDD is not happy.

Prez: Dan hits a DDT on MM, then walks over to Doomer. M1 walks back to the ring apron because the ref is moving slowly. Dan's reaching under the shirt of Doomer, what's that? That's the Tomahawk!!!

Commish: Dan has the Tomahawk and he hits MM with it in the crotch. Oh my God. This is unbelievable. The ref didn't see it. And Dan goes for the pin, but the ref still isn't up.

Prez: M1 goes over and lifts off Dan, then hits him with the Sentence! A Dominator in the middle of the ring! He pulls MM over on Dan and the ref is finally up. He starts a count.

Ref: 1. . . . . . .2. . . . . . . .3!!!!

Commish: NO! Doomer pulls off MM's leg at the last second and the ref didn't see that either. Someone get this man some glasses.

Prez: Both men are reeling and Doomer and M1 exit the ring. The Tomahawk is still in the ring in the corner of the ring.

Commish: And here comes Isis. She's up on the apron and arguing with the ref and M1 pushes the Tomahawk towards MM with his foot. He's got it and he hits Dan in the nuts with it. Wow!!! The ref is turning around now and MM has Dan in pump-handle position for the Bloody Benediction, but the ref calls for the bell. But he didn't even do the move or make the pin yet. Did we overshoot the time limit?

Announcer: The winner of the match as a result of disqualification. . .and NEW CWF Heavyweight champion, Dead Drunk Dan Williams! (The ref hands DDD the belt. He is still on the mat)

Prez: I guess the ref saw MM's Tomahawk chop and since that stip Magnus put in in the middle of the show, we have a new World champ. ("Tubular Bells" by Mike Oldfield plays. Bishop Hell comes out to ringside, followed by Rabbi Dreidel Thief and the Demonic Deacon, Happy the Exorcist and Cardinal Carnage, and Father Nick O'Feeliak and El Altar Boy, who carry large wooden crosses. Friar Folieadeux, the Smoking Pope, Archbishop Apocalypse and El Altar Boy follow. They enter the ring. Murder One, Black Reign, Isis, Dark Angel and the Black Widow enter too.)

Commish: What the hell is this? Is this the whole damn Church, 17 guys?

(Minister Massacre puts the belt around DDD's waist, then throws him on a cross and ties him to it. Murder One ties Doomer on a cross and spits on him. Cyclone, Steve "Iceman" Johnson and Donald McRonald come out to help DDD and Cyclone. M1 wrestles with Steve, MM wrestles McRonald and the rest of the group gangs up on Cyclone, then forces him on a cross. )
BH: My big announcement is the Church is leaving the CWF, but not before we sent off the new world champion, Cyclone and Doomer with a proper going away gift.

(All three men struggle as the crosses are lifted and suspended 15 feet above the ring. The fight continues inside the ring and the crosses catch on fire.)

BH: Now, Go in Peace. . .and Thanks Be To Our God. (Laughs maniacally. The Church exits through the crowd as security arrives with fire hydrants and the crew at the Pond lower the crosses. Johnson and McRonald untie their teammates, who get up and run through the crowd after the Church.)

Commish: What can you say after a disgusting display of sportsmanship like that? Personally, I hope the Church burns in hell for that, but at least the tag team titles stay here, since those Church pieces of sh** are leaving.

Prez: Well, from the Pond, I'm President Pat O'Sullivan. We'll sort this mess out and see you at Uncensored on Thursday.

Special Thanks to: Deadwire, Cyclone and Logan for writing matches for me.
I want to thank you all for helping us to transform the CWF into what it is today. It's been a pleasure serving you as head booker/head angle man, but real life commitments prevent us from continuing. For those of you upset with the way we left, I'm sure you can look back on the past of the league and realize it's nothing different than what has been done before. Have fun and we'll see you later.

Handlers of Bishop Hell and Murder One.

© 1999-2000 CWF