I'm not afraid of falling in love
I'm afraid no one will catch me
I'm not afraid of having my heart broken�again
I'm afraid I'll be unable to reassemble it
I'm not afraid of giving everything
I'm afraid of being left with nothing
I'm not afraid of being alone
I'm afraid of being without you
I'm not afraid of dying
I'm afraid I haven't lived
I'm not afraid, but hold me anyway
no one has ever drawn my bath by candlelight
no one has ever surprised me with a picnic
i may wish for it, but romance is not part of my life
so don't feel bad for providing continuity
i can't miss something i never had, can i?
To look like that
To smile like that
To move like that
I wonder how it feels
To think like that
To create like that
To succeed like that
I wonder how it feels
To be adored like that
To be envied like that
To be extraordinary like that
I wonder how it feels
To be more than I am
Not particularly attractive-
Certainly not gossamer
Not particularly intelligent-
Certainly not genius
Not particularly giving-
Certainly not saintly
Not particularly amusing-
Certainly not comedic
Not particularly talented-
Certainly not prodigal
Nothing special-
Certainly not extraordinary
Nothing special-
Just breathing, barely
i will not apologize for wanting it all
or for telling you i do
i will not apologize for expecting the best
or requiring it of you
i deserve to have it all
i expect to get what i give
if you do not apologize for taking
then i will not apologize for needing
now he only touches me when he's "excited"
at first he would declare his love for me
now he merely responds that he does
at first he would celebrate being with me
now he barely remembers i'm lying here-
and perhaps now i shouldn't be
I am fire
Sometimes warming
Sometimes burning
But always shining
You are water
Sometimes soothing
Sometimes suffocating
But always sparkling
You desire the heat of the flame
I desire a refreshing splash
But I will resist temptation-
I know what water does to fire
I should thank you, really
Most could not have broken my heart
As thoroughly or as easily as you
It's amazing how you feel no grief
I would envy you for your lack of pain
Except that it reflects a lack of true joy
Perhaps I should pity you for not seeing
That love can happen again if you let it
But you are not a man who accepts
Such childish romantic ideals
And you are content and miserable that way
So I thank you for breaking my heart
And showing me that I can love
Despite being broken in the past
And thank you for reminding me
That a moment of love is worth
A lifetime of sorrow
There are no more tears
There is no more joy
There is nothing left of me
Dreary
I want to cry because you're leaving
Smile because you're here
But there is nothing left of me
Apathy
You induced by sorrow
You displaced my laughter
Now there is nothing left of me
Weary
Wanting everything I have
Taking without reciprocating
Until there was nothing left of me
Empty
for JHB
I write poems to alleviate pain
to release suffocating sorrow
but I no longer have use
for such cathartic tools
You've brought light to my life
Now similes refuse to drip
from my pen like wax
from a burning candle
There are no more metaphors
because our love is my poem
I used to write poems
to make myself happy
but now I have more
Now I have you
You made me question my worth
And my sanity.
You made me cynical about men
And love.
You made me restrain my feelings
And my wishes.
You made me curse destiny
And passion.
You made me betray my true self
And I let you.
Please, use your tongue
Slowly spread my lips apart
Taste the warm moisture
Only you can release
The pent up need
I have to come to you
You beckon to me
I willingly arrive
I eagerly await the moment
You place your lips upon mine
You have every right to believe the fault is mine
After all, your biological loyalties lie elsewhere
And you have no reason to see both sides
But do not be mistaken, my heart is broken too
And you have no right to step on the pieces