| After the war is over . . . . -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- David Brown visited El Salvador and spoke to ex-fighters trying to live in peace -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Across the globe traditional enemies are talking peace. In Ethiopia, Mozambique and Northern Ireland, people are preparing for a life without war. In places such as Angola, Palestine and Israel, the healing process has already begun. But how do the thousands of fighters understand the years of war that are now over? The experience of former FMLN fighters, the revolutionary movement which fought the El Salvador Government from 1978-1992, tells the story. "There were many factors that made me involved. My sister was caught, tortured and then fled the country. My best friend, Milagro, stayed at school one night making banners and anti-government leaflets. The National Police found them - there were 17 of them - and killed them all in the school. Then they ripped out their intestines, cut off their sexual organs and hung them from the windows. They mutilated Milagro." The speaker is Ana, 29, an ex-combatant from El Salvador's FMLN, who was involved in the armed opposition from 1982 when she was finishing secondary school. El Salvador's 12 year civil war is over. Many sections of El Salvador are now trying to forget the horror and hardship of the war which left over 70,000 dead. But others are trying to remember why they fought. Ana was one of an estimated 10,000 fighters in the armed rebel movement which signed United Nations-sponsored peace agreements with the El Salvadoran government in 1992. The agreements laid down comprehensive processes for demobilisation, elections, the creation of a new police force and land redistribution. Schemes are being developed to integrate demobilised personnel into the new El Salvador. At the same time, psychologists are encouraging fighters to tell their stories. "Milagro's death gave me a kind of steel to keep going - to fight. I worked in the towns until I came under suspicion. Then I went into the mountains." Despite a strong presence of women inside the circle of guerrilla combatants, there were tensions over women's capacity to fight in combat and jealousy, related to inevitable sexual relationships. Women also seemed to get sick more often. "In the mountains, it was impossible for the women to look after ourselves like we would in normal society. During our periods, we would have to use the same cloth or material for virtually the entire menstruation - they don't sell pads or tampons in a war zone. It was easy to become seriously ill through vaginal infections and then we didn't always have the appropriate antibiotics. "At the same time some of the other women didn't know how to use contraceptive measures and they became pregnant which was even worse because in combat they could not keep up and could endanger us all". If the conditions of the war imposed some unity and an enduring commitment to fight the opposition, then peace has weakened it and led to division, disillusion and loss of purpose. But for Ana it is now the memory of her fallen comrades which helps drive her on. "It was crazy - you were with your friends one day, and the next, they were gone. I remember Oscar, he was 14 and he was shot in the chest during an ambush. He was just a kid and he kept saying to me 'I don't want to die, I don't want to die'. We carried him with us, retracing our steps and erasing our tracks and the blood that was spilt. He spent all day dying and I felt so powerless to do anything. We buried him in a coffee plantation, and then we had to leave, for our own safety. "Those moments of tragedy leave scars and I will never forget them. But it was necessary - it was a necessary war." Now Ana has gone back to work with a women's development organisation in her family's home town. "Through the war I've come to understand a lot more about the range of people who are all working for this same goal as me. I've learnt about life. And because of this I haven't got any regrets." Santiago, 28, joined the guerilla movement in 1981. Unlike Ana, he had little understanding of any social or political basis for the war. "When I joined it was more for adventure than anything else. My family had been driven out of our home by the army and they had killed my brother. I didn't really have much political awareness at the beginning." Early in his combat, Santiago was severely wounded when a bullet passed through his calf muscle. "The worst moments were when we had to go six to eight days without food and all the time we were running from the army blockades, ambushes and bombings. And there were terrible things, terrible sights ..." Santiago is silent for a few moments and then he looks up. "But you know, when I joined the FMLN I was 15, and I didn't even know how to write my own name. Now I can read and write - I have learnt to do things that I never would have done otherwise, like operate communications equipment and to organise groups of people". It wasn't until the November 1989 offensive that the government of Alfredo Cristiani realized that the war had reached a military stalemate. At the same time, the Cold War ended and the murders of six Jesuit priests by the army focused international attention on El Salvador. Santiago breaks into laughter when I ask if all his suffering was worth it. "At least now, for the moment, there is peace and a little more democracy than before. Personally, I feel just great - fantastic. I can't believe that the war is really finished." For thousands of other fighters all around the world this feeling must be placed next to their need to adapt to survive in new conditions often shaped by UN-brokered peace agreements. And what happens when these agreements do not work? Ana's answer is remarkable for its lack of cynicism. "The peace accords have not been met and the things that were promised have not been delivered. But my commitment hasn't changed. We have a commitment to those who have died to continue to struggle for a better El Salvador". |