Tour of Duty

Monday, January 27, 2003 - Memphis, Tennessee; condominium of Robert Lancaster

After over a week on the sidelines, Robert Lancaster decided that he needed to address the MSWA once again.  With Slam Jam fast approaching, he knew he had limited time,  so he took it upon himself - with Stephanie's help - to speak forth.

Once again it was she who took to the camcorder, and she began recording.

The Duke stood in front of a large window, overlooking scenic downtown Memphis.  Lancaster, dressed in a black tuxedo, his blond hair neatly styled, turned to face the camera, his teeth smiling widely.

Lancaster speaks cheerfully.

"Hi there...I'm Rob...and welcome to my digs here in Memphis.  Charming isn't it?  Let's take you on a tour this lovely evening..."

The Duke nods at the camera with a toothy grin, and walks across the hardwood floor, his footsteps echoing as he moves.

"This is the dining room...and this here is our solid oak dinner table, which has been in my family for about three and a half centuries."

Robert sits on the table, with one leg hanging off.  He looks at his table, admiring it highly.  He looks back at the camera, his smile, still transfixed on his face.

"Beautiful, isn't it?  I certainly think so.  It's worth over two hundred thousand dollars...isn't that special?"

Lancaster stood up and proceeded elsewhere, Stephanie following close behind.

"Here is our lovely kitchen, which has a self-cleaning oven, a Jack Lalane juicer, and a Martha Stewart cookbook.  My wife, she has superb taste in men...such as yours truly...but not in cooks I'm afraid."

The Duke let out canned laughter.  Clearly he was not in as jovial a mood as he was letting on.  He walked from the kitchen to the living room, the setting of his last video release, where he last addressed Ripper Longshanks.  Robert sat down, ensuring his tuxedo remained in impeccable condition.

"Given such remarkable accessories and decoration...you may be asking yourself...what is His Grace's most precious possession?  His many cars?  His fabulous money?  No."

Lancaster stood up once more and proceeded a few steps away to his fireplace, where something lay underneath a white napkin on top of the mantle.  Robert proceeded to remove his bow tie, tuxedo jacket, and white dress shirt, to reveal a black tshirt.  The camera focused on the object under the white napkin as he disrobed.

"This is my most prized possession."  He spoke as he removed the napkin.  "The MSWA Smokey Mountain Heritage Championship."  Lancaster picked up the assembly of gold and leather and walked back to his chair.  The image on his black tshirt was now revealed to be an MSWA logo, the words "Where Tradition Rules" emblazoned in silver underneath the MSWA logo.

"And although I have told many that I do not give a damn about holding championships, if I am given the privilege and earn the right to do so, I shall still do everything I can to preserve the championship's honour and prestige.  I have been given this chance, this opportunity, by defeating the talented Chris Wright.  And what have I done since earning the right to call myself second best, to only Mace himself, by virtue of holding this title?"

The Duke's tone altered to a more passionate, stoic level.

"Nothing.  Nothing whatsoever.  I have had one encounter since then, tangling with the now retired Douglas Daniels, where the man who takes pride in naming himself after a homicidal maniac who haunted London's East End in the 1880's - Mr. "Ripper" Longshanks - made his return.  Since then I have sat idle, considering my next movements.  The time for thinking is now to be complimented by a time for action...a time for war."

Lancaster's train of thought continued unabated.

"With the approach of Slam Jam, I have been left without an opponent.  It is here and now that I set things right, however.  That is why from this moment forward I invite anyone and everyone of you - new, old, I care not.  The gauntlet is down.  The entire MSWA is invited to step forward and attempt to lay claim to this championship, whose lineage reaches some of the greats of this sports' history - Jeff Duane - Tiger Akamu - and Chris Stratford."

"At Slam Jam, I shall prove to this federation and to the world that I truly am a man to be reckoned with, a man whose past no longer haunts him - a man who will shed copious amounts of sweat and every drop of blood to defend this championship's prestige, and my honour.  My true reign - my true tour of duty as Smokey Mountain Heritage Champion begins this very second - and I welcome and I dare anyone to try and take it from me..."

The shot zooms in on the gold medallion at the centre of the title, which Lancaster now dangled with one hand, still sitting in his chair.  The shot then fades to black after the medallion blurs into a mosaic of gold and diamond.  Lancaster's English accent deepens.

"True war begins now."