Yet How Far We Have Yet to Travel

Scene I:  New York City, New York - Trump International Hotel & Tower - All Hallow's Eve, Friday, October 31, 2003

The techies I invited into my home scrambled about for a few minutes putting up lighting and ensuring any wiring was taped down and secured.  I sat in my office chair, silent, going through my mind what I wished to say to the man I would face in only two short days.  I tinkered on my computer for a few last moments, making sure what I wanted to display was ready.

I must have watched his little speech a dozen times, at least.  I could not believe nor comprehend the mistrust or bitterness.  That one physical blow could cause his own world crashing down around him, at least in regard to our friendship.  I expected him to be made of stronger stuff.  But he was and is a man of deep emotion.  He does not think - he feels.

"Okay Mr. Lancaster. We're set."

It was time.

"Oh...alright, thank you."

I cleared my throat and took a deep breath.

"On the wall of this study sits the exact photo as that of yours at home.  And when I look at it I see two naive individuals.  Look at our smiles."  

I hold the picture up to the camera.

"Full of hope and confidence for what the future holds.  But the future is now.  And now I see two embittered individuals, virtual strangers now.  And I see a man overwraught with conflict and confusion, absorbed by emotion, who cannot separate fact from fiction, business from friendship."

I toss the picture down on the desk.

"The only tragedy in this is your infinite capacity to misunderstand and misinterpret actions whilst my words say something completely different.  How many times must I say that what I did when I hit you was not against you...it was against the Authority.  And it was for the cause of Liberty so that the Republic of Virtue may be realized."

I think back to what he said about his low points.  What about my low points.

"Those several months ago we both seemed to be spiraling towards the endless depths of hell.  You escaped it.  I embraced it."

A small smile crosses my lips, a small, knowing smile.  It faded however as fast as it emerged.

"Those several months ago you turned to the Authority who as you aptly put it, 'fought like a family.'  Look at this family now. Look at Constantine and Napalm.  You may explain them away but the message is loud and clear.  And look at what has resulted at this Wildfire.  A petty battle to secure the name of the most loathsome individuals to plague the ring.  Some family..."

I knew I was right.  And he did too.

"Jeffery says that I never even tried to help when he was down.  Yet I travelled to Toronto with him when his Authority 'brethren' were no where to be found.  A sad indictment of their nature.  They only help when it is in their interests, particularly when gold is involved.  Where were they Jeff.  Where was Adam-X.  Out trying to get laid?  And where was Mace.  Out at the bar, working out?  And Constantine? Napalm?  And where was I, Jeff."

I narrowed my eyes and glared coldly into the depths of his being.

"Right there beside you.  And where were you at my divorce.  No where.  Yet did I not state that the errors on both our sides in this regard should be acknowledged?  I have acknowledged mine.  Now it's time you do the bloody same thing."

"And you are correct, sir.  I did not like how you reached out to the Authority.  For you never reached out to us, who have fought along side you longer than any of those individuals.  I cannot speak for Seamus but the sting of betrayal burns all the hotter in my soul, Jeffery."

"But at least you had the courtesy to admit your hypocrisy.  In accusing me in the lusting for gold only a week ago or so you concede that you believe me when I say my calculated tactical response was not about that whatsoever.  A shame you conceded that point...for the most damning piece of evidence I was yet to display...but let it be known so that such [my tone altered to one of disgust] hideous malicious lies never cross your lips again."

I turn my LCD monitor to the camera and play the clip I had lined up.


Flashback:  Lincoln, Nebraska - Wildfire! - June, 20, 2003

[ Adam completely misjudges the distance between him and Lancaster and ends up landing face first about two feet shy of the mark. The crowd lets out a collective gasp as Adam hits the match hard and remains unmoving. Lancaster rolls to his feet and looks at the prone form of Adam-X before rolling him over and going for the pin. Through out it all Lancaster has a strange look on his face. He leans over Adam and waits for Stevens to start the count. ]

ONE............

[PAGE]:[with concern in his voice] I think we have a new champ.

TWO..................

[MCCOY]: Ya think.

[Before Stevens can slap the mat for a third time Lancaster gets to his feet and breaks the count. He motions for Finnegan to come closer and the two engage in a hurried conversation before Lancaster turns to Stevens and begins talking with him. The crowd begins to get restless again and this time the boos are louder.]

[PAGE]: What is going on here.

[MCCOY]: I wish I knew.

[Stevens a look of confusion on his face gives Lancaster one last nod before motioning Diamond Lou to get into the ring. A moment later Diamond Lou brings the mic up to his mouth.]

[DIAMOND LOU]: At the request of Robert Lancaster this match has been declared a no contest.

[CROWD]: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

[PAGE]:I am completely lost here.

[MCCOY]: Join the club. Lancaster had this match wrapped up but for some reason he decides to let Adam-X keep the belt.


I raise my eyes and turn the monitor back.

"What sayest thou to that Jeffery."

The more I think of what he said the more holes and omissions I find.

"Let those actions of mine five months ago speak defeaning lessons to you...Kushner that you do NOT know me...and nor do I know you any longer."

"I tried to get your attention through reason.  That failed.  I tried to through conversation.  That failed too.  All attempts at reaching out to you failed.  So if you did not listen to reason...I resorted to force.  And frankly...I do and always will respect you as a person...but I cannot and will not respect you as an athlete long as you wear a shirt bearing the name 'Authority.'  Thus I struck out."

I was getting frustrated.  I had so many things to say and retort to the rubbish he spewed but I could not organize it clearly.  I felt as I was lost, jumping around some poorly written book, page to page, trying to seek order.  I just said whatever came to my mind now.  I cursed under my breath.

"Jeffery...you may be the most single handedly most frustrating competitor I have or will ever face.  I cannot and will not continue to try and retort what you have said.  It is obvious.  There is no point debating with one who is both deaf and blind to the events of the past, or one who does not pay attention to his foe's words."

I was becoming mentally exhausted.  I wanted to keep going but at the same time I had had enough.

"Let me blunt now."

I cup my hands over my mouth briefly.

"In two days time I will have the pleasure of attempting to capture the Heavyweight Championship of the CSWA, for the second time in my career.  And I shall have that opportunity against you.  And I am grateful.  I have waited for this moment for far too long after the empty promises of gratitude made to me by your predecessor.  But here we shall be.  I will stand before you, and you before I.  What will you say to me, Jeffery.  Will you bemoan that shot to your cranium some more.  Will you stand before me and lash out at me as the traitor, when to see one such person all you must do is behold a mirror."

Once again the Dark Force was having Its way.

"I want you to bring all you have.  I want you to bring all your gusto, your skills and your determination to strike down the cursed Lancaster of Wessex.  You are unquestionably the lord of all your survey in your Authority Kingdom.  However I shall never bow my knee before you...nor will any of the Jacobins.  We will rally our forces together at every opportunity, at every turn, and we shall strike out against the forces of oppression.    But even if you should fall to the Nobility of the Sword in only a few short hours.  The battle shall not stop there.  And it will not stop until the battle - the true battle - for your soul - and that of every other member of this federation."

I smiled but not with warmth.

"Oh how far we've come.  Yet how far we have yet to travel.  In forty nine hours this will be behind us.  For the time being.  On the way to the ring look in the mirror and ask if you want to go through with this.  And I hope the answer will be a resounding yes.  And whether I am denied victory or not - you will feel with every fibre of your being, of your mind, soul, and body...that it is libertas an mortis...that you cannot fight."

I could have collapsed in my chair from exhaustion if I hadn't already been sitting.

I believed everything I said.  I truly did.  But would he hear.  Would he truly hear for once in his bloody life what I had to say.

Marissah walked in and kissed my cheek, and put her arms around my neck.

"Babe you're soaked with sweat."

I wiped the sweat from my brow and loosened the tie from around my neck.

"I know...Christ..."  I stood up and stretched.

"How did I sound."

"Confused."  She smirked.  "But ready to kick ass," she added.

"Now why don't you take a shower and come into the bedroom and choose what I should wear...and it'd better not clash."

That was the best thing I had heard all night.


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Jacobins

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