ABC viewers were left stunned Friday night when quasi-celebrity Corinne Grant made a quip on The Glasshouse, and received an actual laugh. Used to dead silence from the live studio audience, Grant stared wildly for a few moments, trying to determine what the noise was. “Sure I’ve heard a titter before, and I’m no stranger to the polite ‘heh’, but this is the first time I’ve heard a genuine laugh in response to something I’ve said”. Grant admitted that she thought guest Ross Noble was doing something behind her back.

Glasshouse regular Dave Hughes was himself shocked into silence, but quickly recovered with a non-sequitur delivered in a laconic, nasal manner. With that, order was restored, and Grant showed no further signs of being funny for the rest of the programme.

“It was so weird”, said audience member Larry Bond. “One minute I was thinking about what an annoying coat-tail rider she was, then suddenly I found myself laughing at her joke”. Bond was unable to remember what the quip actually was, stating that it was “something about Will, I think. It definitely involved what he used to eat for recess at primary school”.

Experts have questioned whether Corinne’s joke was made intentionally, citing the old proverb about monkeys writing Shakespeare. English lecturer Martin Greenhill was one of the few unsurprised by her debut gag. “Over time, with so much exposure to comedy, Grant was certain to make an amusing comment at some stage of her career. We will definitely be studying her closely for signs of bon mots, witty asides and wordplay. It is important to determine whether it was a random assortment of words that got her a laugh, or whether she made the comment with comedic intention”.

Host Will Anderson doesn’t know what all the fuss is about. “I remember my first audience laugh. It was only a few weeks ago at the Melbourne Comedy Festival. It is certainly a shock when your rambling, semi-political rant against Telstra’s voice recognition system gets a response from the lifeless, black pit of the crowd, but you just get on with it”.

Rove McManus was unavailable for comment.

Snake II Clocked

Oyster Bay resident Peter Grubb held a press conference last night to announce that he had officially beaten the popular Nokia game Snake II on the hardest level. With a final score of 9754, Grubb has gained significant status among the highly competitive phone gamer circuit.

“I had to make a few tough decisions along the way”, reported a visibly weary Grubb. “Whether to chase the bonuses or stick to a steady diet of apples. In the end I went for a mix of safe gameplay with an occasional quick points grab.”

He also had his fair share of trials and tribulations. “There was the time my mum rang when I was about to crack the 3000 point mark. And then I had that low battery warning scare when I was sitting in the car at 7-11, nowhere near a power point. My heart was going a hundred miles an hour, until I remembered my special cigarette lighter battery charger”.

Peter, who exercises his powerful thumbs for at least four hours a day, admitted that he had some reservations about finishing Snake II. “Part of me couldn’t believe that it would soon be over. I considered ending the game once I had the record, just so I would still have something to strive for”. A quick chat with his coach - international Snake I legend Darren Hanning - ended these qualms. Within a few more hours Grubb had filled the screen with electronic reptile, clocking Snake II and ensuring his name entered the record books for all time.

The months of stress and training paid off for Peter, who received a special plaque from Nokia CEO Jorma Ollila yesterday. “Peter has really raised the bar for all of us”, said Ollila. “We had better get our eggheads working on Snake III”.

The question on the lips of everyone present was: What is next for Peter Grubb?

“Next? I think I’ll tackle Space Impact”.