october 8, 2004

BUSH v. KERRY Round 2

Well tonight I again could not resist, I tuned in again to the debates. I wish we had these things every night, they crack my shit up. I watched them on cbsnews.com this time, and they use Windows Media to webcast. And let me just say....."Optomized Series 9 Experience" my ass. The debates got over on TV at 9:30, but my video did not get don until almost 10 after all the rebuiffering it did. Damn the rebuffering. Anyway, lets get it going, here are the quotes I liked:

W

�I wasn�t happy to find there was no weapons of mass destruction�" the understatment of the administration �made some decisions that made people not understand our values� our values....so that's why everyone in the world hates us....our values...... �that answer almost made me want to scowl� the pres cracks a good one �rumors on the internets� holy fuck, there is more than one internet? why didn't anyone tell me about this, someone is getting fired.... Bush interrupts the moderator to do a rebuttal response, the moderator all the time trying to tell Bush that he was going to allow an extention....a nice move that made him look like even more of an ass, didn't know it was possible, but hey, thats the magic of the "W" power. �wanna make sure it cures you and doesn�t kill ya� Bush shows his eloquent understanding of pharmacodynamics �missoura� God please stop saying it like that �a modern medical system� like maybe......national health care? Was I the only one who caught Bush doing the wink like 20 times? It was awesome, winking at the end of repsonses, winking while Kerry was talking, laying on that Bush charm that landed him fine poon like Laura �named Senator Kennedy the most liberal senator�.� Whoops, I guess that whole "JFK" initial thing finally got confusing �battling green eye shades� Someone help me. What the fuck does that mean? �is my time up?�.he looked at me like my clock was up..� Jesus man, did you not notice the huge fucking street lights sitting on the ground, were you not there when the rules were read? Come on now. �up the wetlands to 3 million� 3 million what? I love stats that mean nothing, but shit, it sounds big right, and making the wetlands big, or giving them big funding, thats good for sure...right? �inner-city�......sore spots� Nice choice W. �forests aren�t harvested��not taken care of�� Whoops, did I say harvest? I didn't mean that........boo! �allow small businesses to pool together�� I beleive that is called a corporation....a-hole �I own a timber company�.thats news to me�..need some wood?� This was the pinnacle of the evening. No response? Crack a joke.....and the answer W, is yes, I need some wood. �destruction of a life to create a stem cell� Once again showing his flare for scientific understanding..... Did anyone else notice that the pres also couldn't get the format down. After he answered a rebuttal, he would start back to his seat to sit down, only to pull this huge surprised spin around when the moderator started to give him the next question. Funny. no pledge of allegiance is allowing personal opinion to overwrite constitution.....explain to me how that one works..... "the Constitution says that�that....�.it doesn�t say that......" Damn, wish I could remember what that thing says �trying to decipher that� On Kerry�s abortion answer. Oh snap, thats a zinger! �our recession was one of the shallowest in history� Wait, is that good? Shouldn't we have never had one in the first place? Ahhh. love that spin!

K

�military�s job is to win the war, the pres�s job is to win the peace� Come on, everyone has to admit, that line was dominant �95% of cargo that comes into this country is not checked, at the airport your baggages is x-rayed, but the cargo hold is not, now does that make you feel safe?� Saying the exact same fucking thing he said in the last debate.....lame...and drop the fear thing, it doesn't work well for ya. �OGBYN�s�.and brain surgeons� ooops. Now the Bush people will be on CNN tomorrow morning going "OGBYN? What is that? It's obvious Kerry has no understanding of health care..." blah blah blah �cure diabetes��curing some sort of�.a��a��a��a��parapalegic� And they might be right.... �stem cell lines are contaminated by mouse cells�.� where the fuck did that come from and what does that mean? 30 second extention to explain that one please moderator? The abortion question��what would you say to a person that wanted to make sure their tax money did not go to fund abortion programs....I just wish he would have said, "I have three words for that person.....Vote for Bush. �I was an alter boy� That brings up a whole shit-storm, should have left that one out.

During the debate, I kept wondering, "What the hell are they writing on those sheets of paper?" Well, with a little inquiry and a lot of being on hold with CNN, I have actual scanned copies of the candidates scratch papers. This is a Citizen D exclusive, check em out below.

Bush's Paper

Kerry's Paper

They have very good handwriting huh?

Once again, I found the debates to be informative and fun. They are a great way to spend a Friday night. But I must admit. I was very disappointed. Not in Bush......not in Kerry, but in us. The audience at this debate was supposed to be a "town hall" forum. A slice of what represents America. A random sampling of real Americans with real questions. Well I am glad they chose the audience they did, because we have proven to the world that Americans are the following three things: 1. Fucking fat as hell. 2. Uglier than we are fat. 3. Fashion retards. I mean shit, did you see these people. They were basically rubbing fat rolls with the person next to them. I am surprised that during the live feed, someone in the audience didn't have an MI. And the clothes. I wear a tie to the doctor's office everyday, and these lazy fucks show up to a PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE in a fucking polo? God help us all. Take the following examples as evidence:

Nice shirt bitch. Excellent fashion choice. And dude, nice pocket protector/glasses case in the pocket. Way to represent the dipshit contingency of America

Holy shit, check out this fat dude. And there was one even fatter that I could not find a picture of. If you watched, you know who I am talking about, the guy in the light blue shirt and tie....and fat.

Who the hell let the Stay-Puff Marshmallow Man into the debate. Can anyone seriously tell me that this was a well chosen fashion decision. It's black bitch, black is slimming, that outfit makes you look like an albino whale.

I challenge anyone to show my a picture of an uglier man/woman thing. If there is an ugly-tree out there, this monkey would live in it.

And just a few more pics I found funny....

Bush doing his version of "Blue Steel"

How do I spell "George" again?

Kerry reminding Bush to stay off the nose-candy.

There were some complaints from some of my readers that my opinions and post about the first debate were biased because I am a Bush hater. And in response to that, I say.......damn straight. -- Citizen D

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