may 8, 2003
Since I am both lazy and busy, I have requested that my readers submit stuff to post. Leens heeded the call and submitted some stuff. Here is the first installment with another one coming soon.

-- Citizen D
Karaoke - Fun For Everyone!
  I make it a general habit to go to Karaoke every Thursday night at a little place called the Golden Spike.  It is generally a lot of fun, people get up and sing and make fools of themselves and then everyone gets ridiculously intoxicated.  And what could be wrong with this utopia of music and alcohol?  Well, a lot can go wrong, when people are involved.

   My first problem is the obvious politics at work.  The woman in charge, lets call her �Wendy� has her friends and her family, and it seems that they always get first pick on songs.  You can be sitting there, patiently, having turned in your song request sheet and you�ll wait for an hour or two while Wendy�s daughter gets up there and sings: �My Heart Will Go On� like her life depends on it, like she�s going to be the next Celine Dion.  And we�re all supposed to be like, �Wow, she�s really good, she can hit the high notes,� and slow dance.  Whatever.  That�s crap.
 
   But there is a contingent of karaoke people out there who just take it way to seriously.  They live for Thursday nights when they can get up and sing: �The Rose� by Bette Middler or some shit like that.  I personally love the people that videotape themselves doing karaoke.  That�s hilarious.  Karaoke is about being bad, and I want to get up there, totally wasted and stumble through whatever song I�ve randomly chosen, fighting laughter the entire time.  And Yes, I want to be mercilessly teased the next morning when I can only hazily recall the details.  So fuck off.
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