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At that time, I asked
God, "Sure or not? I am so tired after FOC and You want me
to do this?" For me, I just wanted to take a break and not
do anything. However, on Elections Day, when I was nominated, it
took me a lot of courage to say "Yes" to Him. I took that
leap of faith and left my one year of life in His hands.
Looking back, it has
been a very challenging year for me in the Arts FCG. Serving in
the Arts FCG has opened up my horizons a lot and made me more prayerful.
There were beautiful moments for which I will always treasure.
Rosaries every Monday,
Wednesday and Friday were an outlet for me to relieve my tension
and stress in the middle of the day. Whenever I was discouraged
by my Econs tutor, I would offer up one decade of rosary to pray
for Mother's intercession. And after rosary, I would feel much better,
at least stronger enough to continue the rest of the day. There
were days when I felt really in the pits. Those were the times when
I received support and consolation from my FCG members and the Arts
Community. We prayed together and for people who need that extra
strength and faith to carry on with their lives.
My comm recognized the
importance of prayer and so, we took a step forward by having regular
prayer meets where we would just pray and share as one committee
and NOT have any meetings. They were such beautiful prayer meets
as my comm put down all their defences and shared about their lives.
Their worries, fears, joys… Everything is poured out and offered
up to God so that together with the rest of the comm., everyone
will grow in faith and persevere in service.
Whenever we are tired
of serving God, there will surely be some one to push us. To encourage
us not to give up. Such encouragement was especially so vital as
there were moments when my comm. felt so discouraged in serving.
We had organized events where not many people turned up as compared
to the previous events. So when we are so discouraged, either my
members or the Arts Community would encourage one another and tell
us not to give up hope.
Just like any other
usual stuff, we cannot always be on the high. There were some low
points. We had our own misgivings. We had our own little squabbles.
We had misunderstandings but all these will be forgiven and forgotten.
These low points are inevitable in every working committee but what
is most beautiful and most important of all is that there is God
in CSS and God is love. We try to love and to be loved.
God has taught me so
many things that I cannot remember off-hand. He has taught me how
to be humble. He has made me experience the humility He had when
Jesus had to wash the feet of His disciples and even Judas, the
one who even betrayed Him. He has taught me how to love. That no
matter how much I have been hurt, there is always a capacity in
me to love back. He has taught me to believe, that even though not
many people attend our functions, God will still touch these people
anyway. He has taught me the very essence and meaning of support,
something that I try to give and not expect anything in return.
He has taught me to serve without any expectations, something that
I am still trying to learn. He has taught me that it is ok to be
angry but I got to let go of my anger somehow. He has taught me
that for an ugly side of things, there will be a beautiful side
to appreciate. He has taught me many many more things…
For all these, I thank
God. I thank God for giving me such painful lessons. I am still
recovering from some of them but thank You, anyway. But Lord, I
still need to thank You for giving me the extra (to the power of
infinity) strength to serve You. There were times I just wanted
to give up, when I did not believe anymore and You, O Lord, pulled
me up and gave me that extra strength to give myself, bit by bit.
I have been trying my
best. Trying For God. And this is what I wish to share with you
guys today. For all those who are thinking of serving or are scared
to say "Yes" to Him, do pray about it, at least for God.
We do not serve the
people. We only serve God. It is through God that we serve the people.
There are times that we fail but that is what the comm. and what
God are for. The committee provides that source of support and encouragement
so that no matter what happens, they will still believe in you.
God provides that amount of strength and faith you need to give
yourself when you just find it so hard, and really so hard to give
yourself to the community.
Do not be afraid of
saying "Yes" to God. The journey in service is never ever
easy but the fruits that you reap will be bountiful. All you ever
need to do is to give your life to God and let Him take charge.
Ask Him for that amount of faith, trust and strength for you to
hand over your life to Him. You can never do this alone. Do it with
God and in His name.
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