This is not a bester of Death fic. This Fic belongs to Crow and Elveanna.

[email protected]      www.geocites.com/crow_recantation/LordElrond.html

[email protected]    www.elveanna.net

 

Chapter four

 

The kiss was so simple and yet the power behind it was incredible. The pent up years of loneliness came back to Elrond with a rage as he clang on to her as if she was his very soul. Leara was swept away by the dominance of Elrond demanding lips and the pounding of her heart. Surely this was wrong? Angels could not … SHOULD not experience such beauty and pain in a simple kiss and she knew she should push him away. Yet her lips softened without yielding, parted without surrendering. As she tumbled deaf and blind into the kiss, three sets of pale eyes watched with pain and sorrow at the upcoming events, as the Elven Lord dragged their sibling further into shadows.

 

Silistra was talking to Glorfindel about various other songs she knew, when a sharp pain pierced her very soul, as a shift of power took place for the briefest of moments and was gone as soon as it had come. She doubled over slightly and had Timus and Glorfindel catch her quickly. Small sparkles fell into her hand and she looked at them in confusion.

“These sparkles…they are my tears!”

 

Gandalf clutched to his staff with all his might, as the shift of power stopped and everything was once again united. He had never felt such power before except when he had encountered the woman Silistra, but by the look of her she too had been affected by it.  If neither she nor the woman Leara was behind it… who then was?

 

Elrond pulled always for breath and was about to devour Leara’s sweet lips again when he realized she was shivering and her eyes wide open. He looked in to her dark eyes but the mists of mixed emotions prevented him from reading her thoughts. He pulled away to try and read her better yet she was closed to him, tightly so.  

“Lady…what is wrong? Was I to hard on you?”

“Why do people do this?”

“I fail to understand your question, my lady”

“Why do people feel this way? Knowing they want someone but they can’t be with them. They live in pain and sorrow seeing but not touching and yet they’ve never been happier! Why do people do this?”

Elrond sighed and for a few moments considered her question and afterwards could only shrug. 

“I cannot answer you Leara. People fall in love, it’s in everyone’s nature to do so and yet many seem to love the one thing they can not have!”

He walked over to her and took her hands. “I have felt this pain… have been feeling it for the last few days. Watching your every movement, memorizing your every word by heart as if one day you would walk out of my existence.”

“Elrond I…”

“Let us not think of other things tonight. Let us not be Lord or Lady, for this one night; let us be Elrond and Leara. Let us walk into the hall together and have our dance.”

Leara said nothing as Elrond guided her to the hall of his house were all the others had gathered for dancing and merry making. The sea of middle earther’s parted and allowed the couple to walk in to the middle of the dance floor. All the other dancers discretly yet quickly left the floor also wanting to watch the pair. Though Leara and Elrond had already danced this evening, something had changed. The Lord of the land was aglow with joy and a peace was clearly written on his face, and although Leara seemed happy and flushed when she caught Elrond eyes looking at her, it was clear to some that what ever had happened had frightened  her. 

 

Elrond snapped his fingers and a beautiful melody began to play as he took Leara in his arms and began to dance with her. He looked at her contently wanting to look only at her eyes but they were closed. He reached out with his elven senses to try and get her to open her eyes but the more he tried the tighter closed they become. He pulled her closer to him and she placed her head once again on his shoulder allowing him to guide her across the floor.  He felt the eyes of Silistra on him and he turned to face her tightening his hold on Leara. Her sharp hazel eyes were filled sorrow and fear and determination yet she was shaking, but why? With rage? Timus was standing next to her smiling his eyes glued on Leara.

Elrond turned from them and continued to dance. Aragorn and Arwen smiled at him and both gave a slightly nod of acceptance along with his twin sons. Gandalf’s eyes bored into Leara as if he was trying to pull the lady from Elrond’s arms with his eyes. He tightened his grip on Leara and decided to show them all how much she meant to him.

 

Leara felt sick, but Angels couldn’t get sick, it was impossible. Yet she was cold, really cold. She felt weak and dizzy and the dress wasn’t helping her situation. She could hear Elrond’s thoughts, feel his feelings and they frightened her. She was the angel of death, the most feared angel in all the heavens, and here she was in the arms of a great Elven lord who had fallen in love with her.

What would he think of her if he knew who she was? Would he be disgusted? Angry for her lies? Heartbroken when he discovered he could never have her? She would leave…tomorrow…tomorrow evening…. the day after tomorrow sounded better, then she would be rested and could say good bye properly. Why wouldn’t the earth stop moving and allow her to enjoy this dance? She had a feeling she knew what was going on… the shift in power, her sudden ability to be ill. 

 

The music slowly began to die out and Elrond pulled away from Leara, so they faced each other. He took her hands in his own and raised them to his lips. She shivered visibly now and knew that at any moment she would faint. This could only be their doing. If she fainted in Elrond’s arms she would make sure the certain they would know why she was the most feared of angels! He was looking at her, his eyes told her his intentions and she pleaded with her own, no, but it was to late.

“Lady Leara, I am well aware that you can not stay here much longer, and will be joining your cousin in Gondor. I want you to know that you are welcome here always” He leaned over and kissed her forward. “I cannot ask you to stay, even though I would desire you stay for all eternity. Know that I wait with baited breath for your return, capturer of my heart!”

No sooner had these word left his mouth, Elrond suddenly realized who amiss Leara looked. She was paler then usual, almost gray, her dark eyes were no longer sparkling with life.

“Leara?”

“Elrond… forgive me…” it was no more than a whisper when Leara submitted to the pain and fell heavily into Elrond’s arms taking him down with her to the floor. Everyone gasped and rushed forward to see what had happened to the young woman. Timus pushed his way past everyone and quickly snatched Leara form Elrond’s arms into his own.

“Timus, return her to me!” Elrond stood quickly and looked furious at the mad elf.

“You’ll forgive me, my lord, but myself and Lady Silistra are better equipped to handle Leara! It would not be wise if you follow, your presence will only make her worse.”

“How dare you!!”

“My lord if you love her, do not follow” These were the words of Gandalf who came up next to Leara and touched her forehead. “She has a high fever, she needs aid. Lady Silistra, I will aid you if you allow me!”

Silistra said nothing but nodded as the wizard and the tall elf with Leara in his arms walked slowly out of the room leaving Elrond to explain what was wrong with Leara.  

 

They walked quickly to Leara’s room and placed the unconcsious angel on the bed. Silistra asked both men to turn as she quickly undressed her. Leara’s fever had gotten worse, trails of sweat began to fall off her brow.

“Timus can you get me a bowl of water please, and some cloths” asked Silistra as she stroked Leara’s hair.

Timus bowed quickly and did as she had demanded. Gandalf stood and watched in fascination.

“I didn’t know your kind could get sick in your mortal forms.”

“We don’t. Though it has been known for us to suffer from pain if we broke a law of our creator!” said Silistra looking intensely at Leara who was now muttering away.

“What law has she broken?”

“None… unless…” Silistra looked frightened for a moment and then pulled her pupil closer to her.

“Unless what?”

“I cannot say.”

Timus came back with a bucket of cold water and a cloth and gave it to Silistra.

“But what of that shift of power? That has something to do with her illness, does it not?” asked Gandalf as he watched intensely what Silistra was doing.

“There are other beings in my world, more powerful than myself, Leara is one of them.”

Timus and Gandalf looked at each other with raised eyebrows. 

“I know it seems unbelievable, but it is true. Leara has great power, just inexperience, but there are others,  three, with incredible power and they serve all kinds on middle earth. Her two older brothers and her sister are behind this illness, of that I am sure.”

“But why? She has completed her mission, has she not?” asked Gandalf.

“She has, Gandalf, but there is one power that can not be controled even by the most powerful of angels,” said Timus as he sat down beside Leara on the bed.

“And what is that?”

“Love, dear wizard. Love is what makes this world of ours go round and it is the pain of love that has caused Lady Leara to be ill.”

“She must leave as soon as she is able, Timus!” said Silistra sharply.

“She has a choice you know!”

“Her siblings will not let her go!”

“They have no choice in the matter and nether do you!” 

“We will see!”

 

Leara opened her eyes and took in her surroundings. She was no longer in Rivendell that was for certain. It was too dark. She was in a dark hallway that was lit by fire lanterns. Statues of angels weeping or praying stood around her, their stone eyes fixed on her. Leara was more than angry… she was frantic! Not only was she ripped out of the mortal realm, made a fool in front of Elrond and his guests, but also she was now in her angel form. Dressed in her black “Angel of Death” clothes with her long grey wings out. Was she ever going to make THEM pay! THEY knew she hated the outfit she was in. It was a long black dress that had slits all the way up to her thigh with knee high boots, and a long black cape.

She stood up, brushed her dress down and started to walk to the main hall. The grand hall was an endless space of stars and mirrors. One could never be sure wether one was walking on the ceiling or the floor or if moving at all. Leara entered, facing a huge white table with four thrones around it. The thrones were pearly white, decorated with diamonds. One of these were for her, the other three were taken by THEM.

Next to her was a woman, older than Leara. She had long brown hair tied in a ponytail, though it still reached past her ankles. She had snow-white skin and green eyes, with full red lips. She wore a long white dress with a black coat like a robe with her long white wings folded behind her chair. She was Diana, angel of silence and wisdom. To her left was a man closer to Leara’s own age, sitting lazily with a leg swinging over the arm of his throne. He was dressed completely in black leather with a midnight blue robe that shone like stars. This was Remiel, angel of sleep.

The one she faced was the eldest. He was completely black save for his pale skin and dark blue eyes. His black hair was spiky and long and rested on his shoulders. His arms were crossed and his huge black robe blow about him giving the impression that he had eight wings instead of the six he had. He was the Head Arch Angel of dreams and the left hand angel to the creator.

“Well met Leara, Angel of Death, our youngest sister!” he said, his voice sounding like rolling thunder.

“Well met, Ruskin, my brother!”

“Will you not sit, sister? If has been too long since you have come home. You spend to much time with the mortals!” said Remiel.

“There is nothing wrong with being in the mortal realm, brother” hissed Leara as she sat down in her seat in a most ungraceful manner. Diana shook her head and smiled at her sweetly. Leara smiled back wearily and greeted her sister properly.

“Well met my sister!”

“Little sister, do you know why you have been brought here?” asked Ruskin.

“Let us not start with business, brother dear brother, our youngest sister has FINALLY returned home and she has been through a lot and is in need of refreshments!” Four sliver goblets appeared in front of the four angels, each one filled to the brim with warm milk, for milk and honey were the only two things next to bread, angels eat. Leara drank from her goblet quickly, gulping down warm smoothing liquid. She felt all three sets of eyes watching her and sighed as she looked down at her once again filled goblet.

“Have I been brought her to be punished because I allowed a mortal to fall in love with me and kiss me?” she asked.

“No, dear sister, you have been brought here because you have fallen in love with the elven lord Elrond!” said Remiel.

Leara’s head snapped up and looked at her siblings in fear and confusion.

“You were not even aware of it. But then how could you be? You are inexperienced in such matters of the heart!”

“But I do know love. I love all of you my siblings as well as my guardian Silistra.”

“That is not the love we mean child! We mean the love that is felt between two people. Love that is so wonderful that they can only be happy if they are together! This is the love that has begun to grow in your heart!” smiled Ruskin. “It is beautiful, isn’t it, little one? You always want to be with him, you want to see him happy and to never see him depressed or unhappy. You want him to look at you as if you’re his world and he needs no one else but you!” He watched Leara blush brightly before he laid down his blow. “But this cannot be with you and the elven Lord.”   

“Why not? Surely our creator did not give me a heart if he had not wanted me to use it!” Leara’s eyes filled with tears but she refused to let them fall.

“True, our hearts are built for love. But like love, our hearts are fragile, easy to break. What will your elf think of you when he discovers you are death? Do you honestly think he will take you in his arms and kiss you passionately upon hearing this knowledge?” asked Remiel.

Leara looked down and shook her head slowly. Diana rose from her throne and walked over to Leara. She started to stroke her hair, giving Remiel an angered look.

“It had to be said, sister, I did not mean to be harsh but she must understand that Elrond will not - cannot - accept her for what she is! Death!”

“Enough, brother! Leara is very aware of what she is. The point is, are you truly in love with Elrond, Leara?” asked Ruskin.

Leara stood up, her wings flared out, her green eyes ablaze. “HOW DARE YOU ASK ME THAT, BROTHER! Of course I love him, I would not had have allowed him to be near me, touch me, kiss me if I did not love him. I would give anything to be with him.” She fell into her chair. “Anything.”

The three other angels looked at each other, frightened and yet quite serious by their sister’s outburst.  Diana smiled and though there were tears, she kissed her sister’s forehead and jested to her brothers, with her hands, a fall. The brothers looked at each other then back at their younger, now weeping sister. Remiel sank deeper into his seat, clearly showing his disliking of the matter, but he was not about to interfere if Ruskin agreed with Diana. If this went wrong, it was on their heads, not his, he wanted nothing to do with his sisters downfall.

Ruskin knew that Timus would sooner or later tell her of the FALL, it might as well be now. He rose from his throne and walked over to his little sister and picked her up in his arms. Leara felt the warm love that came from Ruskin and stopped crying. Ruskin was never good with emotions so whenever he did things like this, it spoke in volumes. She rested her head on his shoulder and looked around, discovering that the other two had gone.  

“Little sister, do you truly love Elrond? Do you know what you say? You are still young!”

“I have lived since there was life on this earth, brother, I’m hardly young!”

“Ah, but you are my little sister, compared to me. If you truly love him and are willing to do anything to be with him… there is one thing you can do… but the price is extremely high!”

“I’ll pay it, brother!”

“I do not believe you would. There is one way for you to be with Elrond, and Timus holds your answer!”

“Timus? But he is but an elf!”

“Hahahaha! Is he? Talk to him Leara! He holds all the answers that you seek!”

“One more question my brother. Why did you and the others make me sick?”

“We worry about you little one. We feared that Elrond was taking advantage of your inexperienced heart. So when every time he was close to you, he would make you ill, you would therefore keep your distance! But the spell has been lifted and you may now return to the mortal realm!”

“Thank you brother, I will go now!” She leapt out of his arms and started to run out of the hall.

“I must tell you one more thing, sister!” shouted Ruskin.

Leara turned, dreading what she was about to hear.

“The moment Timus has told you what you need to know, you have until the end of the week to make your choice. If you have not made your choice by then, you are to return here and never see Elrond again!”

Leara bowed to her brother knowing full well that she could not argue with him, and rushed from the hall. Diana appeared at Ruskin’s side and let him rest his head on her shoulder.

“Have we done the right thing, sister?”

She nodded.

“I hope so. For I doubt either of us can take an eternity of I told you so from Remiel!”

With a roll of her eyes, Diana once again nodded and walked out of the great hall with her brother.

 

“She is waking up!”

“What does this mean?”

“Hush, she’ll be sore for certain.”

Leara’s eyes opened slowly as Silistra, Gandalf and Timus stood over her. Indeed she was sore, sore all over, but she was in some way content. She smiled at her three watchers and they sighed with relief.

“Leara! I was so worried!” said Silistra as she hugged the young angel.

“Indeed, we believed you had fallen grievously sick and would never wake up!” added Gandalf as he rested his hand on her shoulder.

Timus smiled at her and leaned over and kissed her forehead. He then looked at her face and saw the intensity of her eyes.  “What is wrong my lady?”

“I must speak with you Timus, on a matter most important and I must speak to you alone.”

Suddenly, there was a knocking at the door, very loud and violent.

“Who is that?” Leara asked.

“It’s Elrond. He came twice last night trying to find out if you were all right. He used his key to get in here and when he saw you feverous and unconscious, he refused to leave. It took Gandalf, Glorfindel and me to get him out. He promised us he would return in the morning and nothing would stop him from gaining entry.” laughed Timus. “Do you want to let him in or rather wait until he knocks down the door?”

“Let him in before he hurts himself, Timus!” came Leara’s answer.

“Be careful, he doesn’t take you out with the door, Timus!” smiled Silistra.

Timus acted as if he was creeping towards the door in very slow motion. He quickly turned the key and jumped out of the way. Abruptly, Elrond stormed into the room looking franticly around, until his eyes cast down on a now conscious Leara.

“LEARA!” he shouted as he ran to her side. He touched her forehead and looked at her deeply as if to reassure his mind and heart that she was real. He kissed her forehead and her cheek, his eyes brimmed with tears.

“I was afraid that I lost you!” he whispered as he hugged her tightly.

“You almost did… but I cannot explain right now, Elrond. Please, leave with Silistra and Gandalf, I must speak to Timus in private.”

Elrond’s eyes flicked angrily for a moment as he stared at the other elf. “What must he hear that I cannot?”

“It is not what I’m going to say, but him. He needs to explain something to me and it is most important!” Leara pleaded, but Elrond’s eyes were fixed angrily on Timus. She leaned forward and planted a kiss on Elrond’s cheek and smiled when he faced her. “Jealousy does not suit you, my elven lord! Please leave and know that you literally hold my heart in your hands!”

Elrond smiled and kissed Leara again before he rose to leave. He stared at Timus for a little while before he and Silistra and Gandalf left, closing the door behind them.

“What is it you desire to know, lady?”

“Do you know where I have been Timus?”

“In your bed asleep all night, lady!”

“I was with my siblings, Timus. Dream, Sleep, Silence. They knew about my… feelings for Lord Elrond and they where concerned for me. Dream said there was a way for me to be with Elrond and that you held all the answers!”

Timus sighed and gave a smile as he sat down on the bed as Leara sat up.

“I had a feeling you would ask about me one day, but not for this reason. I was once, what you are… an angel.”

“How? You’re an elf!” she said, startled.

“That’s right. Let me explain. About a hundred if not so more years ago, I was a lord here with my young wife. I left one day going on a journey, when I was attacked by Orcs. I died. Before you could come to take me, Silistra took me before the heavenly council. They believed my soul was too pure to waste in the hall of waiting so I became the first elf guardian. At first, everything was fine, I was happy and…”

“I already know about your wife, Timus and I am so sorry for your loss!”

“Thank you. Speaking of her is not an easy task, but she is the reason I returned, the reason I took the fall!”

“The FALL?”

“The fall. You make the choice to fall to earth and become mortal! You basically say, ‘I want to live’ and then fall. When you wake up, you’re in pain, aching all over, your eyes are stinging from the light and you’re hungry. It is the most amazing thing… to be born again. But if you do it, it will be your first time, and I will be truthful, its not all it’s creaked up to be, Leara. It’s painful, you will never experience pain unless you have experienced life! But then… making love… that’s an experience that makes life worthy of all the pain.”

“Make love? What is that? Isn’t that what I and Elrond are doing now?”

Timus laughed hysterically. “No… no, child. You’re falling in love, not making it! You are so innocent in these matters! But do you understand… if you take the Fall, you will never be with Silistra or your siblings again. Is Elrond really worth losing everyone you have ever known?”

“As I have said before to my siblings… I will give up everything to be with him!”

 

Elrond stood on his balcony looking over at the willow tree where only twelve hours ago, he had confessed his love for Leara. The kiss felt so strange… he could feel her lips and her tongue but like her skin they were cold. She did not really respond to the kiss, more like surrounded to it. Could she even feel it? He had lived many years and had many loves but none of them were like Leara, she was anonymity. It seemed to him that whenever he wanted to talk to Leara alone, Silistra or Timus were there, placing a protective barrier over her. Now Gandalf, his best friend, had also joined in, but who was he protecting, her or him? Whenever he was with her, he felt younger, as if the burdens of his station had been lifted and for the first time in almost a century, he was truly happy. He could not imagine not having her by his side, to make every morning and seeing her wondrous smile. That smile alone could warm his heart and keep it warm even in the bitter winter. He could spend his days looking in to the depths of her eyes and get lost within them.

Her eyes were truly her best feature; they were powerful, deep, and beautiful. It were also her eyes that told him that she held a terrible secret from him. Whenever he asked about her past she became silent for a moment as if she had to think clearly about what she was saying. Everyone had a right to keep secrets, but he wanted to know Leara inside out.

“Jealousy does not suit you, my elven lord!”

She was right of course, but he could not help feeling it. Timus, the dishonoured elven lord, mad beyond understanding, had her ever confidence. They would whisper in secret as young lovers would when they were about to do something to increase they relationship. Timus was only… 300 years younger than himself and had only had one lover his entire life, while he had much more experience. Elrond shook his head angrily at himself; he should not think such things. Had Leara not confessed that her heart was his?

“…know that you literally hold my heart in your hands!”

What did she mean by that? She spoke in many riddles, and he could never figure out the answers. He needed time with her, and her only. They had to speak about their relationship without the others interfering, especially Timus. He loved Leara, and he would bind himself to her and live a mortal life.

He went back inside his study and quickly wrote down on a piece of paper and called for Glorfindel. The blond elf came as quickly as he could and bowed slightly to Elrond.

“What can I do for you, Elrond? Is Lady Leara well?”

“She has awoken and is well. I need you to give this to her. And then make up a small basket of food and my best ale and have someone taking it out with a blanket to the clearing by the waterfall.”

“You plan to woe the mortal Elrond?” smiled Glorfindel as he took the note.

A small but noticeable blush rose in Elrond’s cheeks and he shook his head. “Our feelings for one another have been made clear Glorfindel, it’s what happens next that I must ask!”

Glorfindel nodded in understanding “Do you wish me to be near by in case you need anything?”

“No… I do not think that is wise, but thank you nether the less old friend!”  

Glorfindel nodded and went to do as Elrond asked, as Elrond went and got himself prepared.

 

“I can’t believe you told her! ::SMACK::

“I only told her what she wanted to know Silistra!” said Timus now rubbing his sore head.

“You could have lied!”

“She would have seen right though it. Her bother Ruskin told her about it and told her to talk to me!”

“Ruskin? Ruskin wouldn’t tell his own younger sister about the Fall. He is the head of all Angels next to Samantha, he just wouldn’t do it!”

“He would if he believes it’s the right choice! Leara is in love with Elrond and Elrond is in love with her, they can’t be together if she doesn’t take the Fall! You know this Silistra, so accept it!” 

“I know… I just wished I could have seen this, I could have done something!”

“Love happens, no matter what, my dear Silistra! And Leara’s siblings known this and have given her the chance to be with him.”

“Excuse me!” the two looked at Glorfindel as he approached with the note in his hand.

“Good morning, Gorlfindel, what can we do for you?” asked Silistra.

“I need to see Lady Leara and give her this note. Is she in her room?”

“Give the note to me Gorlfindel, I’ll make sure she’ll get it!” said Silistra as she held out her hand.

“I cannot do that Lady. I have been given orders to hand this personally into Lady Leara’s hand!”

Silistra was quickly losing her temper but knew it was not in anyone’s best interests if she took it out on Glorfindel. She left out a sigh of defeat and gusted to Leara’s room. Gorlfindel knocked on the door loudly and entered. Leara was sitting on a chair, looking out of the window and admiring the view.

“Lady Leara?”

“Yes Glorfindel?” she didn’t even look at him.

“Lord Elrond asked me to give you this note!” he said as he came closer.

She turned slowly and looked at him for a split second. There were tears running down her face when she took the note and asked Glorfindel to leave. When her door was shut she quickly opened the folded note and read it.

 

My Dearest Leara

We need to talk. In private!! Come to the clearing by the waterfall and come alone. Tell noone where you are going! All my love and heart

 

Elrond

 

She read the note twice just to make sure she had read it right. She went over to her mirror and quickly brushed her hair. She was wearing the same outfit that she wore when they met save the skirt was black instead of blue. She put on her cape and began to walk towards the gardens, but Silistra stopped her.

“Where are you going?”

“I’m going outside, Sil, for some fresh air.”

“I will go with you!”

“No… I want to be on my own Silistra. I… have a lot to think about!”

“…alright!”

Leara walked faster through the great house and almost broke in to a run in the garden until she came to the clearing.

 

Elrond stood by the basket of food that was sitting on the laid out blanket. His hair was completely down from its usual braids. He wore a plain golden colour tunic underneath a passionate red colour robe. He had left his sliver circlet in his room, not wanting Leara to feel uncomfortable. He refilled his goblet of ale for the third time and drank it quickly. He didn’t know why he was so nervous. He had only been waiting half an hour with no sign of her. Had Glorfindel given her the message? Or had the lady in waiting Silistra gotten in the way? Had Leara disappeared again? He hoped not, he had enough trouble with seeing her when she wasn’t invisible.

A sudden movement of leaves and the sound of running feet caught his attention and he quickly put down his glass. Leara came into the clearing, slightly out of breath. The sun reflexed off her pale skin, making her looks almost white. Her green eyes sparked like emeralds, as the small lips curved into a smile.

“Well met, Lord Elrond. I came as you requested!”

“Well met, Leara. Please call me Elrond! There is no need for titles here!”

“Very well. You said you needed to speak to me!”

“Let us eat and drink first, you need your strength after your fever.” He gusted towards the basket.

“You sound just like my brother,” she smiled as she sat down on the blanket.

“I thought you said you were an only child!”

“I… lied, I have two older bothers and a sister!”

“Where are they? Does Aragorn know?”

“They are far from here and no, Aragorn doesn’t know, because he doesn’t need to,” Leara rushed her sentence.

“If you believe that it is best. What would you like to eat?” Elrond asked as he opened the basket. Leara looked in the basket and smiled brightly when she noticed some bread as well as a jar of honey.

“I’ll have a bit of bread and honey.”

Elrond smiled, glad to see her finally eating. He watched her keenly as she took a small bit of the bread cover in honey. She closed her eyes with a smile plastered on her face. The sun gave her an earthly glow and Elrond wondered if she would look as beautiful like she did now, when he made love to her. He quickly shook his head and reached once again for the ale.

“Would you like a glass?”

“I’m not allowed alcohol unless on special occasions. And I didn’t think you Elves where allowed any either!”

“We are not really, only on special occasions like you! And today is important!” He handed her a glass.

“Why is it important?”

“Because we need to talk about our relationship Leara!” 

Leara drank her ale in one gulp and looked at Elrond with frightened eyes. “I was afraid that this is what you wanted to speak about… I have much to tell you. But I’m afraid!”

“Then let me speak first!”

“But this…”

“Please!” he placed his fingers on her lips and she went silent. “I love you, Lady Leara, cousin of Aragorn, daughter of Arthelion. I wish to spend the rest of your days with you. I want to BIND myself to you.”

“Please stop…”

“This must be said. I want to live a mortal life with you. If you die in one hundred days, I want to die in one hundred years minus one day, so I will never have to live a day without you! Do you see that there is nothing I would not give up to be with you?” 

“You cannot give up your immortality, Elrond!”

“I can and I will, but you must tell me now Leara, do you love me or not?”

“I love you with all that I am and that is why I cannot allow you to give up your immortality. Because if you do… you will grow old and die and I will remain as you see me now!”

“I don’t understand!”

“I am not Aragorn’s cousin, the birth certificate is fake! I was sent here to aid your family, Elrond. I won’t tell you how or whom I have aided because its not my place to say. My people have wandered the earth since the dawn of time, we are lot older than you elves.”

“That cannot be!”

Leara quickly took a knife from the basket and slit her arm and then both of her cheeks. Elrond knocked the knife from her hand before she could do anything else. He went to yell at her but stopped and looked almost in disbelief. The blood from her wound trickled down her skin and then evaporated, the skin slowly pulled itself back together and the burse it should leave faded. She faced him almost daring to question what had just happened.

“My kind cannot be hurt, wecan not age, and we cannot die! We cannot feel the way you do and we cannot act the same way with emotions.” She stood and took a deep breath. “I am too afraid to tell you who I am or more to the point what I am!”  

“I don’t care.” Elrond stood and grabbed her and kissed her passionately, running his fingers through her hair, pulling it hard, and biting her lips. He broke away abruptly and held her arms so she couldn’t move away.

“Tell me you felt that!” he demanded.

“No, I couldn’t! Please let me go!”

“If you give me your word that you will not leave!”

“You have my word!”

Elrond slowly let go of her arms but he was more than ready to grab her again if she tried to run. He could clearly see that she was fighting to remain strong and not brake, two could play at that game. He would not let her leave him. He would search the world over until he found her. Leara shook her head upon hearing his thoughts.

“You wouldn’t be able to find me Elrond. My people don’t live here!”

“Then where…”

“You know that place between asleep and awake, where you still remember dreaming? That’s the place were my people live!”

“Who are you, Leara? You must tell me, so I can understand! I love you, you can tell me anything!”

“I… I am… I am… I can’t! You would loathe the sight of me if I told you!” She closed her eyes and turned away.

“Do not turn from me Leara! Do you desire for me to get on my knees and beg? I will do it!”

“There is one who can tell you everything you need to know. You must talk to Timus.”

Upon hearing the name, his eyes flashed with anger and he shook with rage “Why! Is he your lover? Or was your lover? Who is he to you Leara?”

“Timus and I have never been lovers. He is a friend and he is very wise. He can explain to you what I can not!”

“WHY?”

“Because to be with you I must make a sacrifice. Timus knows what I mean because he already did it!”

“You don’t need too…”

Please just talk to him Elrond… my love, he’ll explain everything.” She kissed him but she could not feel it and disappeared. Elrond looked around for a few moments calling out her name. Then he grabbed the bottle of ale and quickly drained the liquid.

The alcohol only fuelled his anger and pain as he stormed off in search of the elf Timus. He would get his answers whether he had to ask or beat them out of him. He would then confront Leara and ask her to marry him and be his queen. Whatever Leara was it could not be that bad could it? And what was this sacrifice she was on about? He stormed towards his home, unaware that Silistra and Ruskin were watching him.

“My Lord… this can only turn out ill” said Silistra, watching the furious elf.

“It takes two to speak the truth - one to speak it and the other to hear. Elrond deserves the truth. “

“But must it be like you have said? Must Timus…”

“Yes Silistra. I think in the end he would appreciate it!”

“Must I say good bye to Leara? I love her very much as a daughter” said Silistra as tears filled her eyes.

“Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened!” 

“Your words bring little comfort my lord!”

Ruskin, Head Arch angel of Dreams wrapped his arms around Silistra’s waist and did the one thing he had not done in centuries. He began to sing. He sang of the changing world and how they changed with it, he sang about loved ones and how to let them go. Wrapped in Ruskin’s feathered wings and robes, Silistra allowed herself to cry and prepare for the pain of Leara’s choice.

 

Timus stood, motionless, all his senses sharpened to the highest level. Since he had returned to the mortal realms, his view of the world had changed. In earlier times, he had not cared much for his surroundings. But now he had learned to take in every moment as if it was his last, he knew far too well, how soon all things could come to an end. With his eyes closed, he listened to the song of the wind and to the tales it told him from distant lands and far seas.

He heard the soft footsteps of Elrond, even before the elven lord appeared on the terrace. Not turning, he slowly opened his eyes and his lips curled in a grim smile.

“Well, well, well… If that ain’t Elrond, lord of Rivendell, coming to Timus the mad, seeking his council. I knew you would come to me sooner or later.”

“I must speak to you.”

The strange nuance in Elrond’s voice finally made Timus look at the other elf. He studied his face intensely for a moment, then turned away again. “You are drunk.”

Elrond angrily turned him around. “Do not dare mocking me! You owe me something!”

“Why? For putting up with me for all these years? For defying me against people who would rather see me ten thousand miles away from here and for pretending not to see the glances they give me? You are right, I owe you something.” He gave a sharp laugh.

Elrond did not answer and Timus looked to the ground as he took in a deep breath. “Forgive me my rudeness, my lord. Over the years it has become a cloak which I use to defend me against those who do not treat me with the same… acceptance as you do.”

“We were once friends, you and I,” Elrond said silently, feeling his rage suddenly dying away and being replaced by weariness and sorrow.

Timus looked straight into his eyes. “Yes.”

“Why has this time passed? What has happened to you? What made you change that much and filled you with this bitterness and anger? Where did your joy go?”

Timus looked at his lord. Elrond was surprised to see his usually sparkling eyes now filled with great sadness. “It died with her radiant eyes.”

“Anariel…”

“Yes.”

They both were silent for a minute. Then Elrond spoke again. “But you left her here. She… we thought, that you were dead. But you returned. After seven years!”

“Now you want to know, where I have been during these years.” Timus hesitated. “Have you spoken to her?”

“Leara? Yes, but what has this got to do with…”

“Then I can tell you.” He clenched his fists, as if convincing himself of his strength before speaking out what he had held back all the years, hidden from the elf, who was once his best friend. And still was, in his eyes.

“I was once, what she is now, dwelt in the immortal realms which she calls her home, sang with them, cried with them, shared their existence. I was one of them.”

“Them?”

“The angels. The guardians of death and life. Although I never met Morwen in person, I recognized her the minute she walked into your courtyard, disguised as Aragorn’s cousin.”

It was only when Elrond’s jaw went open with puzzlement and confusion, that Timus realized, that Elrond had not known yet of Leara’s true nature. She has not told him!!! Time seemed to stand still as the two of them stared at each other in disbelief, both trying to sort out their thoughts.

“What? What are you trying to tell me?”

“No! Forget what I just said. I must be fantasizing again.” Timus tried to avoid Elrond’s eyes and hastily turned to leave, but Elrond got hold of his arm.

“Wait! You will tell me right now, what you mean by that!” Elrond’s voice was that of the elven lord now, commaning and not accepting a denial, and Timus knew that it was too late and he had said too much. He sighed and closed his eyes.

“Are you telling me that she is an angel? That’s ridiculous! Angels don’t exist!” Timus gave Elrond a sad look and realized, that although the elven lord was denying this, he already began to believe what Timus had told him. That this was not another fantasy of a mad elf, but the truth. He will fight this knowledge it for a while and then he will see, that I have spoken the truth. And betrayed you, Leara. I did not know… How can you ever forgive me?

Unable to say anything, Timus could only observe Elrond, who measured the length of the terrace with long steps, his head fighting against his heart, which already knew that Timus had not lied to him.

“Please forgive me…” It came as silently as a whisper of the wind.

Elrond looked at the other. “Forgive you? Why? You have not betrayed me! You have told me the truth and I must thank you for this.”

“But I…” he did not finish his sentence. I betrayed her. He swallowed hard. “If you would excuse me now, my lord, I have matters to discuss with Glorfindel.”

Absurd, as this lie was, Elrond did not notice. He was deep in thoughts and hardly realized, that Timus left the terrace, nearly running, when he finally reached the gates of Rivendell. There, outside the walls, he sank to the ground, burying his head in his arms, and noone could say, if he wept, for he made no sound at all.

 

In the afternoon, dark clouds came from the west, bringing a cool wind and the promise of rain. The people of Rivendell had read the signs and remained inside, waiting for the waters to come. Only one single figure silently slid through the gates, cloaked with a black cape, face hidden under the hood. The lonely wanderer followed the terrace path eastwards and quickly crossed the old bridge over the River Bruinen. He made his way into the woods, always peering over his shoulder to make sure that noone followed. Only when he reached the comforting shelter of the ancient trees, Timus revealed his face and sighed in relief.

He was about to make the hardest journey he ever was off to and yet his heart jumped for joy, because now, that he had made his decision, all the years of anger and bitterness seemed to fade to grey and leave nothing but the warm feeling in his heart that he would finally see her again. Anariel…

Although he now stumbled forward like half asleep, he knew exactly, where he was heading to. He followed the route leading up northeast towards the stone seat, but before reaching it, he left the trail and made his way off-roads, following a hardly recognizable path through the undergrowth. Thorns and low branches tore on his clothes more than once and left scratches on his skin, but he didn’t care. The pain caused by the small wounds only drove him deeper into the strange state between fear and excitement he was in. Reaching a small clearing, he stopped and tried to regain his breath while looking around, noting with content, that he had reached his final destination.

Timus knew, that hardly anyone knew this place, and he would undoubtedly not be disturbed here. A small stream had its origin here, escaping the tight grasp of the earth in a silver spring. Next to it, someone had long ago placed a stone statue of an angel. The angel looked at him with her empty stone eyes and Timus suddenly realized, that it resembled Silistra. That was strange. He had always thought that this was a statue of Morwen but it looked more like the archangel that had once brought him to the angel’s realm.

He sat down at the angel’s feet, feeling comforted by her spreaded wings, and produced the small flask he had brought in the pocket of his robes. He did not know, what it contained, and he had not asked for its contents, because he just did not care. The old woman had promised him that it would go fast and would not hurt. He only hoped, that she had spoken the truth, for he had seen people enduring terrible pain after they had taken a venomous poison. In the distance, thunder rolled. Timus looked up into the sky and smiled. He would wait another while, before he took it, so that the last thing he felt would be the rain on his face.

 

At the same time, Leara looked up at the sky. There would be rain, no mistake, and she decided to take a walk into the woods. She loved the rain and besides, she wanted to avoid meeting Elrond until he had spoken to Timus. She could not face him now, not after the conversation they had had. The passion in his eyes, when he had kissed her by the waterfall, still stood before her inner eye. And also the hurt, when he had to learn that she could not feel his touch the way he did. What would it feel like, to be kissed by him, if she was a mortal woman? Would it be like the warm feeling an angel felt in his heart, when a child was born? Her finger traced the invisible marks his lips had left on hers, trying to recall this moment.

Leara tightened up her shoulders and took her black cloak. The rain would surely cool her head. Silently, she crept through the house, again cloaked in invisibility in order to leave unseen. But she met not one soul, even in the house, everyone seemed to hide from the coming storm. Without hesitating, she left for the woods.

Underneath the roof of leafs, the air was already moist, in greeting of the rain, that the earth had long enough longed for. Deer and birds had silenced, and everything was as peaceful as it could be. Leara closed her eyes, taking in the perfect silence, when suddenly the world cried out, telling her, that very close to where she was, a life was about to end. Her head spun into the direction her feelings had told her, and she knew that it was her duty to carry this soul away.

As she made her way through the undergrowth, the earth silently wept for the death of one of her children. Only an angel could hear this sound, and it tore Learas heart apart as it did every time, when she encountered it. How many souls had she delivered since the beginning of time? She did not know, but she remembered each of them. Stepping out into the small clearing, she knew, that she would remember this one for all eternity.

There, underneath the statue of an angel, lied Timus. He seemed to be sleeping, but Leara knew, that he was not. Her footsteps were lighter than an elf’s but he had long enough shared the angels’ existence to hear them nevertheless. When he heard her approaching, he slowly opened his eyes and smiled.

“Leara. I was hoping that it would be you, who would come for me.”

Leara knelt next to him, taking his head in her lap. Timus did not resist, he was already too weak. She knew, that it was too late for him, all she could do was to give him comfort and peace.

“But Timus, why…?”

He smiled, trying to keep his eyes open to look at her. “I betrayed you. I am sorry. I told Elrond who you are.”

“But you did not betray me! I told him to speak to you, because I could not tell him myself.”

He closed his eyes. “That does not matter now. No more. I am dying.”

“No, you won’t. You can’t!” She cried out in despair. “I need you here!”

He touched her cheek with a cold hand. “Don’t cry for me, angel. Just promise me something.”

“Everything.”

“Do not take me to the angel’s realm again.”

She took his hand and squeezed it tightly. “No, I won’t. You will be united with her again, united with Anariel. I promise.”

He closed his eyes again and went silent for a while and Leara wondered if he had gone without her knowing, but then he spoke again. “Tell me one last thing. Did you come to her when she…?”

“No.” She shook her head. “I did not. I was not with her.”

He smiled. “But you will be with me now.”

“You do not have to be afraid.”

“I am not. Don’t you fret, I do not feel any pain.” He took in a deep breath. “I hoped, I would last until the rain comes.”

As if at a command, the first cool drops began to fall. Leara looked up at the skies, trying to see the cause of it, the universal mind behind it all. An elf, one of the purest creatures on earth, would pass away all alone in the wood. And there was noone, save her, to witness it. They would mourn for him, no doubt. But they would never know, how he died. What he felt in his last moments. There was nothing compared to an angels’s feelings when a soul left this world. Leara spread out her wings, and placed them around the dying elf in an effort to give him a last comfort.

Timus opened his eyes. “That feels good. Thank you.”

Then he died.

Leara placed a kiss on Timus’ forehead and her tears mingled with the rain, as she cradled his head in her arms and lap. “Good bye, my friend. Aellian firia’men[1].”

 

Silistra shivered, her face going all white. In the wink of an eye, three men, one of them Aragorn, rushed to her side, in case she would faint.

“Are you alright, my lady?” asked Aragorn.

“Sit down,” insisted Glorfindel and guided her to a bench. “I will bring you a glass of wine.”

“Water will be fine, thank you. It’s the weather. I feel the storm coming.” Silistra smiled at them, to assure everybody that she was fine. But in her heart she knew, she wasn’t. Something terrible had happened, and stretching out her senses, she soon knew, what. She felt the presence of death, felt it close.

“Timus…”

“Silistra?” Aragorn was at her side now. “What about him?”

“Never mind. I just feel a little… dizzy. I think I will better go to my room and take a rest.”

“I will walk with you, my lady.”

“No. Thank you. I can make it alone.” She left the hall, almost running, when she got outside. She thought about going to Leara, but changed her mind quickly. She had done this for ages she could handle this alone. Perhaps Leara would think about the idea with the FALL, now she had seen a friend’s death. Silistra could only wait for her return and hope.

 

“Tears for Morwen’s victim?”

Leara slowly stood up, carefully placing Timus’ head on the ground, and faced Gandalf. Her eyes shot arrows at him, as she stood before him in all her flory as the angel of death.

“I did not kill him, istar!”

Gandalf studied her face. “No, of course, you didn’t. I am here to help you bring him back to Rivendell.”

The angel considered his offer for a minute, and then Gandalf saw her features growing softer again, her wings vanished, as she became the image of beauty she had been the last few days. He sighed in relief.

“That is better, thank you. I once was curious about your kind, but I prefer your present form much more. It is not so disturbing any offence meant, of course. I … uhm…”

“I know you feel uncomfortable when I show my real face. You will never see it again. We should return now.”

Gandalf nodded, and picked up the now lifeless body of Timus with no effort. Together, they walked downhill, heading back for the city. Leara knew, that now she had no other choice, as to face Elrond and make the hardest decision of her existence.