Homecoming
By Soho178
Disclaimer: For Entertainment
purposes only. The characters and situations of the TV program "
CHAPTER 1.
Sam Kincaid searched the
room, looking for clues to explain the disappearance. The man he’d dropped at
his door last night seemed happy to be home. This morning he was gone, horse,
saddle bags, everything.
Eyes roaming the room, they
stopped on the pile of old newspapers by the stove. The firebox was cold,
halfway to being lit. Some of the papers rested apart. Walking over, he scanned
the headlines and swore.
Two weeks of non-stop travel
and a year of exile hadn’t prepared Heath Barkley for the turmoil that shook
him when he rode through those gates again. Typical of his personality, his
face remained set and unreadable, only the eyes reflecting any of the war that
raged inside. He’d left two days after returning from the logging camp that
Matt Bentell ran for the Barkleys.
He’d stayed just long enough to close his bank account and make good on some
promises. It had been two silent, anger filled days. He’d done their bidding,
protected the man, and he’d proven them wrong. He still hated him, was content
to live his life hating the man. They weren’t content to let him, so he’d left.
Heath knew how to disappear.
Even if he didn’t, the family knew it was over between them. A thousand million
imaginings of ways to heal the rift hadn’t changed the irrevocable nature of
what they’d done. For six months there had been unspoken grief between them and
the knowledge that they had destroyed something very precious. The one victim
in it all had been his sister, the one person who had taken his side, against
the rest. She’d ended up caught in the crossfire of their warring desires. And
typical of most wars, the innocent victim had paid the highest price. He was
here because he owed her. He told himself that if it had been any of the others
he would have simply crumpled the six month old paper and burned it without a
second thought.
Duke McCall, standing n the
barn doorway, just inside the shadows, didn’t know whether to cheer or swear at
the sight of the man who rode up to the house and just sat there for several
minutes.
“Hey boss, you want me to go
find out who that is?” One of the younger hands who
had been working in the barn came to his side.
“No, no, I know who it is.
I’d best go up to the house.” He started the long slow walk, just as the rider
dismounted and headed up the steps.
It was lunch time, likely
there’d be someone home. He walked in without knocking and strode to the Dining
room. He’d been right, the three of them were seated
at the table in a pathetic imitation of what had once been a loving ritual.
Family meals at this table were supposed to be loud and unpredictable, graced
by the give and take of people who knew and loved one another. The deathly
silence that hung in the room was unnatural and caused the hair on his neck to
rise.
It took them a moment to
react. His entrance hadn’t been loud, that was Nick’s style. Even quieter now
than he’d been when he lived here, he simply stood there until they saw past
the trail dust and the beard and recognition dawned.
“Well look who’s decided to
visit. Mighty nice of ya to stop in little brother.”
Nick spat the words out with so much malice in his voice that it caused Heath
to mentally regroup. He wasn’t sure of what he’d expected, but this wasn’t it.
“Nick, Mother, Jarrod.” It
wasn’t a greeting laced with love, it was the tone used with those you had to
be wary of, not quite enemies, but not to be trusted. A spark of something…was
it hope or pain?…flickered in
“Whadda
you want, Heath?” Nick matched him tone for tone, but the rage building inside
him was tangible.
“I came to see Audra.”
CHAPTER
2.
“Why you sonoffabitch!”
Nick launched himself at Heath in a flurry of fists and rage. The blond had
been taken off guard and hit the floor before he could defend himself.
Silently thanking his maker
that he’d trusted his intuition and trailed the younger man into the foyer,
Duke was on Nick in a flash, pinning his arms.
“Let me go Duke!” He
struggled to push the bull of a man off himself.
“Not until you calm down
Nick. Your mother don’t need this on top of everything
else.” His voice cut through Nick’s anger and the dark cowboy suddenly went
limp.
Heath watched with wary,
uncomprehending eyes. Rising, he put some distance between himself and the two
wranglers. He didn’t know what he’d been expecting, but this welcome wasn’t it.
His confusion grew when
Nick followed his Mother’s
progress up the stairs with his eyes, then looked around and swore once more.
“Where’s Jarrod?”
“He left a minute ago,
through the kitchen.” Heath had been the only one to see it.
Duke cocked his head towards
the back of the house with a questioning look and Nick’s shoulders slumped in
defeat.
In yet another dizzying shift
of events Nick’s anger flared. “You want to see Audra? I’ll take you to her!”
He stalked out of the house not even bothering to see if his blond brother
followed. “Duke, get the supplies and the wagon.”
Heath opened his mouth to
question the Foreman but received a silent shake of the head before any words
could be spoken. He didn’t know where he stood with Duke, didn’t know if the
man who had accepted him early on as a Barkley son was now friend or enemy. From
the grim set of his mouth, Heath wasn’t betting on the former. He chided
himself for his foolishness. Why did he even care?
He fell into step with Nick
and Duke, who carried a saddle bag over one shoulder. Ciego
was hurriedly hitching up a team to meet them at their destination. Duke nodded
at the longtime Barkley ranch hand in unspoken confirmation of the preparations
the man was making. Heath had the feeling of having walked into a play where he
didn’t know the story or the lines but everyone else was well-rehearsed.
Nothing felt familiar or comfortable. Nothing was making sense. It was as
though he’d memorized the lines to one play and was trying to make them fit a
different one.
The path they headed up led
up the hill behind the house, to the spot where he’d spent so many mornings
watching the sunrise. It continued on to the family cemetery. Heath matched
Nick’s urgent stride as he continued on. He’d visited the cemetery only once or
twice in his months at the ranch, the only grave there being that of Tom
Barkley, the father he’d never known or forgiven. Even the knowledge that his
own mother had chosen the life of the town bastard for him, rather than risk
losing him to his wealthy father hadn’t moderated Heath’s anger. His inability
to forgive Tom Barkley had been the one sticking point in his relationship with
Audra. She had loved her father with all devotion of an adolescent girl when he
was murdered. In her mind he remained her knight errant, her prince, the man that all others must measure up against. He’d never
begrudged her that love, but she was simply too young and too sheltered to
understand his point of view. Still, she’d been the one to accept him without
any reservation.
Heath followed in silence,
his heart pounding. This wasn’t the way it was supposed to be. Why were they
heading to the cemetery? His mind flashed warning signals that his
consciousness refused to acknowledge as they rushed along. He had come to see
that she was alright, to apologize to her for leaving and for not being there
to protect her. The dread that grew with each step up the hill told him that it
was too late, just like with his mother, he was too late.
They were back in the
Library, drinks in hand. Heath had needed one after the scene at the cemetery. “We take turns watching him. Duke helps, the hands all know to come right away if they see him
by himself. Mostly it’s Mother though. She spends her days with him.”
It would have been hard
enough seeing Audra’s headstone there, next to Father’s. By the time they had
reached the last stretch of the trail he’d known what would lay at the end. It
hadn’t made the seeing any easier. Even worse had been Jarrod and the way Nick
and Duke just calmly dealt with the situation, as though it was a familiar and
well worn routine. He’d been kneeling at her grave, sobbing, body shaking with
profound grief. The suit jacket folded neatly to one side an overlooked detail.
It was only when Nick had
walked up to him and reached down that Heath had realized that the shaking was
more than simple grief and Nick was taking something out of his oldest
brother’s hands. Jarrod didn’t resist, he just dropped his head and began to
rock back and forth, fists pounding his thighs as hard as he could.
“I’m so sorry Audra.” Jarrod
just kept repeating it over an over, half chanting, half crying. When Heath
approached he was horrified to find blood covering the front of the pristine
white shirt. Nick handed him the silver fork that he’d pried from the other
man’s grip and turned to Duke who held the medical kit nearby. Together they
began to bandage the bloody forearms.
“It’s okay Jarrod, Audra
knows. She loves you Pappy, she wouldn’t want you doing this.”
Jarrod jerked out of his
grasp and Nick swore as he tried to keep his hold.
“Don’t call me that!” The
scream tore from his throat as he launched himself at Nick’s chest, fists
flying. He rained down punches, pummeling Nick over and over. “I told you not
to call me that….I can’t be Pappy anymore!” Nick tried his best to hold on and
Duke joined in the struggle but Jarrod was like a man possessed.
“Dammit
Heath, help us!” Nick’s voice cut through his shock and he launched himself
into the struggle, finally helping pin Jarrod to the ground. All three lay
across his body holding on as best they could. Jarrod’s grunts and curses
finally gave stopped at the same time his body gave up, exhausted.
“Don’t call me….Can’t
be….Pappy…. don’t call me that!’
Nick finally helped Jarrod
sit and looked in the once bright eyes that held so much pain. The depth of
suffering Heath saw there shook him. The tears coursed down Jarrod’s face onto
the once white shirt. “I’m sorry ….sorry…it’s
my fault. They’re gone because of me. Don’t you see, I don’t deserve it…..” He pleaded with Nick, “I’m sorry, so sorry…”
Nick wrapped his arms around
his brother and held on until the body he was holding calmed. Jarrod’s head was
buried in his shoulder and Heath could still hear the apologies repeated again
and again.
Heath had made himself
forget the gentle side of his middle brother. In his need to protect and heal himself,
he’d forced every kind thought about the four of them out of his mind. Watching him as he gently soothed the
distraught eldest brother had brought a flood of memories that he’d tried to
exorcise. From the looks of Jarrod’s arms Nick had done this a lot lately. He
looked at the fork on the ground and shuddered.
“Help me get him into the
wagon.” Nick’s voice cut through the memories and brought Heath back to the
present.
He looked down at Nick’s
blood stained shirt, the ruined bandages on the ground, the gashes still oozing
blood but couldn’t move until Nick ordered him, “Let’s get his arms taken care
of.”
“He punishes himself.” The
simple statement of the obvious brought Heath back to the present and left it open for him to decide where the conversation would lead.
The trouble was, he had no idea of where to begin. After
a few moments silence Nick simply sighed and started talking.
“Why are you here Heath?”
“I told you, I came to see
Audra, I didn’t know…”
Nick looked at him in disbelief, it had been in papers across the country…the
kidnap, the extortion, Jarrod’s withdrawal from the race for Attorney General
as ransom for his sister, and finally the failure of the kidnappers to return
her.
CHAPTER
3.
Heath sat in the Library and
digested all that his brother had told him, all that he’d seen himself.
As the evening shadows grew
longer, Silas came in to ask them if they wanted any dinner. Even he didn’t
seem to have any heart left.
“A sandwich would be fine
Silas. I have to go check on Mother and Jarrod.” Nick stood to leave and Heath
made to follow.
“No offense Heath, but I’d
rather you didn’t.”
He was about to object and
say they were his family too. Then he realized that they weren’t any more. Old
habits died hard. He’d been here for less than eight hours and he was already
falling back into dangerous habits. He needed to get himself under control or
he was going to end up hurt all over again. He nodded his head and let Nick go
alone.
Later they were sitting at the kitchen table
eating. Heath hadn’t been able to bring himself to sit in the Dining room
again. He was angry and not hiding it well.
“Spit it out Heath or go eat
somewhere else. I’m too damn tired for playing guessing games.”
“You said Audra’s body was
never found. She could still be alive.” She was the only one of the family
still left to him. He began to shake with the intensity of his anger. “Why’d
you give up on her so quick?”
Nick took in the clenched
jaw and the white knuckle hold on the glass in his brother’s hand. His anger
sparked off his brother’s. Who did he think he was, coming in here and
questioning the choices that Nick made in this living Hell? The familiar storm
gathered in the hazel eyes. Lightening flashed between the two.
“Why you…” He clenched the
edge of the table to keep his hands still.
“I only see one person sittin’ at this table
who gave up.”
Heath sprang, grabbing the
other man by his shirt and dragging him from the chair. Nick grabbed his wrists
trying to push them aside but he was off balance and couldn’t get the needed
leverage. He ended backed up against Silas’ pot rack as the heavy cast iron
pieces crashed to the floor.”
“Wrong
Nick. You all chose Bentell over me. I never stood a chance.”
“Heath! Nick! Stop it now!” Silas’ voice boomed at them.
Neither had ever heard the gentle man’s voice raised in anger until now.
“If what you need is to go
outside and beat each other to death then just go do it. I’m sick of the both
of you!”
Heath loosened his grip when
Nick relaxed. “Sorry Silas.” The two men spoke as one.
Reaching for one of the
large copper pots that had rolled across the floor, Nick still needed to vent
his anger. “What the hell makes you think I’ve given up? Where do you get off
acting so self-righteous about anything I’ve had to do?”
Heath glared back and said
two words “The headstone.”
Of course, it would seem
that way. He shook his head.
“We put it up about two
months ago. It just…we just…they needed to accept and move on. It’s helped
some.” Heath’s eyes widened at the thought that what he was seeing in this
house was an improvement.
“I’ve still got Pinkerton’s
working on it, but so far there’s nothing more.” He settled with his back
against the massive wrought iron cook stove and rubbed the weariness from his
face.
“Look Heath, you’d best
know, I’m thinking of selling the ranch and moving Mother and Jarrod back East.” If the previous statement had surprised Heath, this
one shocked him to his core. Nick Barkley was devoted to the ranch that was his
father’s life work and legacy.
“You can’t do that Nick, it
would kill you.” The statement spoke volumes about what he knew and felt deep
inside about his older brother, as well as what he didn’t know after his long
absence.
Anger flared and there was a
hint of the old Nick as he yelled “You just don’t get
it do you? We’ve been dead for months, just don’t know
enough to lie down.”
As quickly as the anger came
it left. “No it’s best for Mother and Jarrod to be away from all the memories
this place holds.” Somehow Heath couldn’t be sorry he’d provoked the outburst.
Somewhere the old Nick still existed, still held on.
He tried not to be happy about that, tried not to care, but the feelings were
creeping around the edges of his heart.
He tried and failed to steel
himself against the hovering desire to care about these people. “Do those include me?”
It was Nick’s turn to rest a
speculative eye on his younger brother. “Yes.”
“Why are you telling me
this?”
Nick chose the safer
interpretation of the question. “You’re legally part owner of the ranch. I’ll
need your signature on the documents when the sale is concluded. You’ll need to
let me know how to get in touch.”
“How about I just give you
my Power of Attorney before I leave and that will take care of it.”
“That’d be fine.” Nick locked himself away in the study until
it was time to call it a night. Heath slept in his old room, not surprised that
it still looked as he’d left it. Victoria Barkley would have insisted.
He woke to the sound of
crying. Waking in his old room, so familiar yet so foreign, disoriented him so
that he thought it must have been another of the dreams that had plagued him
over the months. But then he heard it again, carried faintly through the walls.
Following the sound to its source he stopped outside Jarrod’s door unsure
whether to enter or not. In the end he cursed his weakness and opened the door.
Jarrod was lying on the bed,
his hands in restraints. Nick had explained that it was necessary for a few
days or he’d simply rip open the stitches that Doctor Merar had put in earlier.
Heath moved to the bed and sat down,
placing a hand on his brother’s shoulder.
“Shhh,
Jarrod, it’s okay, it’s only a dream.”
He’d been mistaken, thinking
Jarrod was asleep or at least still lost in his other world. He didn’t know
that this was one of the increasingly rare moments of clarity his brother would
experience. The voice that answered in the dark room was reminiscent of the man
he’d left behind all those months ago. “Heath, can I ask you something?”
Instantly on guard he
nodded.
“Why didn’t you come? I’ve
never known you to be a callous man. I never thought you’d hold our decision
against Audra. Why didn’t you come when she was taken?”
Jarrod’s lucidity startled
him, as did the words that seemed to hold no malice for his actions, only lack
of understanding.
“I couldn’t Jarrod. I didn’t
know. I spent the last 8 months in a work camp.”
The sharp intake of breath
was followed by such a typical Jarrod question that it broke Heath’s heart. “My
God Heath, are you okay?”
Heath shook his head and
blinked back tears. He was glad the room was dark but for the moonlight
cascading through the window. Here was a man tied to his bed in restraints
asking if he was okay. Some things never changed, Jarrod was one of them. “Yeah,
it was actually okay. Run by a man with no axe to grind. Stern
but fair. Not a cruel man like…”
“Bentell.”
Jarrod finished it for him, saving him the need to say the hated word. He
started pulling against the restraints, agitated.
“Calm down Pappy, calm down.”
“Don’t call me that!” Heath
cursed himself for the slip. Nick had told him earlier that Jarrod had refused
the term of endearment from the day Heath had left the ranch.
“Why are you doing this to
yourself, Jarrod?” In the dark he could see the bound man shrug his shoulders,
heard the tears in his voice.
“Someone has to pay.” He
started struggling against the restraints anew.
“For what?” He dropped his hand down in a protective gesture.
“You okay?” The voice from
the doorway was cautious.
Heath ignored the question
and bent down to whisper in Jarrod’s ear “Shhh, quiet
big brother, quiet down. Go to sleep.” He rubbed the older man’s shoulder in a
gentle rhythm and waited as the breathing evened out and eventually slowed.
Rising to take his leave he
turned to find the other man still propped against the doorframe. “Work camp,
huh?”
“Yeah, seems my temper was a
might out of control.” Nick just shook his head.
Dawn found them in the yard,
Heath with his horse saddled and ready to leave. Nick’s resigned acceptance of
his departure deepened the sense of dread lodged in his heart. He would have
given anything for even a glimpse of the famous Nick Barkley temper. He needed
to hurry, very soon there would be nothing left here.
Somewhere in the night he’d
stopped lying to himself. Hard as he tried he’d never been able to stop caring.
Whatever they’d done, however well meaning but misguided their efforts, they
had acted in what they thought was his best interest. He could hate what they’d
asked of him, hate what they’d put him through, but he just couldn’t bring
himself to hate them.
Taking in the saddle bags
and bedroll, Nick bid his younger brother farewell. “It was good ta see ya again Heath. Take care
of yourself.”
“You’re not rid of me that
easily Nick.” His lop-sided grin flashed for just a second. “I’m goin’ after Audra.”
Dare he hope? Nick clamped
down on his reaction. Why would Heath be able to do what a dozen Pinkerton
agents and Federal Marshals hadn’t?
Riding past the barn, he
slowed as Duke stepped out of the shadows. “Is this ‘Goodbye’?”
“More like ‘See ya’.”
“Where you
off to boy?”
“Gonna find my sister.”
Duke smiled up at him, “Good
luck son.” He glanced at the back retreating into the main house. “Don’t be too
long.”
CHAPTER
4.
Heath swore silently to
himself. His arm was throbbing and he wasn’t at all sure how he was going to manage
this. Audra was in the convent. That much he knew. And he was pretty sure the good
Sisters wouldn’t give him away once he got there. The problem was, he’d been
spotted and now the place was swarming with Alvarado’s men. From the looks of it
he didn’t have much time. The men who had just arrived were outfitted for
traveling. He had a feeling they would be moving his sister even further from
civilization, deeper in the mountains south of the border, as soon as she could
be readied to travel.
A flurry of raised voices
caught his attention as he watched from the nearby copse. His command of
Spanish served him well.
“She is not well enough to
travel! It will kill her!”
“Then she will die! I have
my orders to move her today. Maybe you want to tell Senor Alvarado that you changed
his orders!” The man in charge was big and burly, but somehow easily cowed by
the stern faced nun in her imposing religious garb.
“You go get him and I will
tell him just that!” The man groaned.
“Mother Superior, what am I
to do? I have my orders. He will not be disobeyed.”
“And how happy will he be if
you kill his plaything before he has the chance to have his fun?” The nun’s
face was grim. She wasn’t certain that keeping this beautiful young girl alive
was doing her any favors.
What if we take her in the wagon?
Will that help? And you can send along someone to care for her.” He looked at
her hopefully.
“You must promise to send
back my charge before you reach the house. Send her back with a man you can
trust.” She peered at him stonily.
He nodded his head. It was a
compromise that they could both live with.
Heath scuttled around to the
back wall of the convent scouting for a way to sneak in. Alvarado’s men would
not be allowed on the convent grounds. The good Sisters would prepare the
wagon. With his mind focused on the structure in front of him he didn’t hear
the soft footsteps behind him. One hand covered his mouth while and other
pointed a gun in his back. When he heard the hammer of the pistol cock he
stopped his struggles.
“Just answer my questions
with your head. Do you understand me?”
He nodded. “Good you speak
Spanish.”
“You are here for the girl?”
Again he nodded.
“Are you family?”
A third nod.
“I am going to release your
mouth. Speak quietly or I will shoot you and tell them you were trying to rape
me.” His eyes widened in surprise. These sisters, for he supposed that was who
she was, were not to be trifled with.
“Heath, Heath Barkley.”
This time it was the
Sister’s turn to be surprised. “She told me you had left, that you hated them.
Why would you be the one to come?”
“She was partly right, I did
leave. But I discovered that it’s hard to hate people who love you.”
“Down!,
Shh!”
They both crouched, barely
breathing as footsteps approached the tangle of bushes and brambles that hid
them.
“Hurry up and do what you
have to. The sooner we get back the sooner we can leave for the hacienda.”
“Don’t be in such a hurry, they still have to get the wagon ready for the girl.
Now that Alvarado is back from
“Don’t be a fool, she is
high born. After he’s done with her he will sell her to one of his trafficers. I hear there are places were they pay a fortune
for golden-haired women with blue eyes.” The voices faded as they moved back
towards the front of the convent.
A restraining hand kept him
crouched in the bushes while the woman whispered in his hear, “Stay calm, Senor
Barkley, save your anger for the trip ahead. Getting caught now will not help
your sister.”
Breathing deeply he did as
she said, she was right. He needed to think, not react. He turned to look at
the face that belonged to the voice. It was hard to tell age, but she appeared
to be a little older than he was.
“I will make my way back
around the front and enter the convent. There is a door just around the corner
there. Wait until you see it open then come inside quickly. Mother Superior will delay as long as she
can.”
“Wait, before you go. How is
my sister?”
She looked at him for a
minute, the concern and love in his eyes warmed her heart. She is fine, Senor.
As soon as we received word that someone was here asking for her we began to
plan for a way to get her to you.”
“But she’s sick.”
“No, she is taking an herb
that makes her appear sick. When it wears off she will be quite fine.”
Fifteen minutes later Heath
was inside the convent, hidden in the dark recesses of the barn.
“Senor Barkley, this is
Sister Bernard, our Mother Superior.”
He took her hand. “Sister, I
want to thank you for what you are doing.”
“Nonsense, it is what must
be done.”
“What is your plan?”
“There is food and water and
traveling clothes for her under the straw in the wagon. It is good and thick so
it is well hidden. You must hide in the straw and wait for night to fall. Your
sister will be over the effect of the drug by then. And the guards will have
eaten the cookies that they stole from our kitchen.”
Heath looked at her with
raised eyebrows. “It is a game. We bake on a hearth outside the convent walls
to feed the school children. When Senor Alvarado’s men come, we bake extra that
somehow make it into the supplies for dinner. Today those extra cookies have a
special ingredient. The guards will sleep very soundly and feel very refreshed
come morning.”
She smiled at him. “Wake your
sister and sneak out of camp. There will be horses hidden by a stream about a
mile down hill from the road. Follow the stream up hill,
it will take you away from the road and through some very rough country. They
will not think you would go that way. Once you have crossed the first set of
hills, look northward and ride towards the Table of the Gods. At its base you
will come to a river. Follow it upstream, around the mountain and through God’s
Pillars. From there head straight north. You will only
be a few miles from the border. There is a town just across the border. The Commandant
there can be trusted. He will protect you until you can move further north.
“Won’t they know your horses
are missing?”
“Senor Barkley, you are
‘borrowing’ Emilio Morrow’s horses. Emilio is one of Senor Alvarado’s most trusted
Lieutenants and he just happens to live in the opposite direction that you are
heading.”
“One other
thing. You must not reveal
yourself to the novice who will be accompanying your sister. You must hit her
over the head and knock her out. They will be close enough to the convent that
they will bring her back here, where I can protect her from Alvarado’s anger.”
Heath looked at her speculating.
“You’ve done this before.”
She merely smiled. “Let me
treat your arm, there is not much time now.”
CHAPTER
5.
The hours spent in the hay
were stifling. He’d spent the time reflecting on how he’d ended up here in the
first place. Would things have been different if he’d never left after Bentell? Maybe Audra wouldn’t have been out alone on the
way back from the mission. Maybe he would have been able to use his dubious
past acquaintances to pick up the thread of her kidnapping sooner. Jarrod might
be the California Attorney General, not blaming himself for the family losing
both a brother and a sister. Nick would
still be rampaging around the ranch in full bellow and Mother,
she would still have that sparkle in her eye.
Heath had left the ranch and
gone to the Pinkerton’s office in
Jarrod was charismatic,
good-looking, and had a reputation as a man of honor. He was waging a winning
campaign and it had the fat cats worried. Killing him would have been easier,
but probably would have spurred his replacement on to victory. No, the idea was
to get Jarrod to quit the campaign. So the plot had been hatched to kidnap
Audra. But Castleman
wasn’t ruthless enough a man to pull this off. Heath knew there had to be someone else running things.
“If you’re gonna do this
John, you’d better get rid of her fast. They aren’t gonna let this go by
quietly.”
Richard Dreyer, industrialist,
philanthropist and one of the biggest trafficers of
opium on the west coast, was sitting in his study, contemplating how to play
what Castleman was suggesting. He had much to lose if
Jarrod Barkley was elected. The plan was workable, but needed some
modifications. “Let me contact a friend of mine south of the border. He just
might be the man to watch over your package for a few days or weeks.”
Castleman had never intended for Audra to remain in
“John, what’s to stop him from rejoining the
race and announcing what happened to the world?”
It had seemed reasonable at
the time. Two months into his term, he had finally realized that Audra was
never going to be released. As long as Dreyer held onto her he not only had
total control over Castleman, but he could also watch
the Barkley family self-destruct, a process that was giving him great pleasure.
Heath spent a week on the
waterfront listening and talking to old contacts who knew him from another life
and by another name. What he had learned alarmed him but didn’t surprise him.
He had a good idea what had happened to his sister, and if the rumors were
right, he had precious little time to do anything to help her. One name kept
popping up. Javier Alvarado. He’d been a bit player years ago, when Heath
worked the waterfront. Now he’d risen to prominence with his fingers in a
variety of activities from smuggling and opium to white slavery.
Heath thought back over his
visit to John Castleman. It had been had been quite
informative and he hoped his family never learned of the lengths he’d gone to
persuading the man to talk. Unfettered by the legalities that Pinkerton and the
Marshals had to observe, it occurred in the wee hours of the morning,
unannounced, and at knife point. Heath’s threat to geld the man if he didn’t
write out a confession naming names had helped it along. Armed with the
knowledge from the docks, he was certain he had gotten the truth.
At first Castleman
hadn’t believed him. “You wouldn’t. You’ll never get away with it!” The
frightened man had tried to bluff the bearded, rugged stranger standing over
him.
“Well, I’ll give ya credit
mister, ya do have brass ones. Now look at me. “He grabbed the chin and held it
tightly. “I’ll do it and I’ll deliver your balls to the others as a warning
about what’s going to happen to them for their part in this. I’ve been to
prison and survived it, I can do it again.” He pressed the knife to the skin on
his throat and reached down to clamp down painfully. “What do you think will
happen to you in there without these? You’ll go and become some bull’s plaything
for however long they let you live.”
He tied Castleman’s
hands behind his back, stripped his sleeping pants and held the knife to his
groin running the tip down the inside of his thigh. “Do I make my point?” He
drew a trace of blood just for emphasis.
The confession was safely stowed
at the Pinkerton office and Castleman, still intact
but decidedly terrified, had been taken to wait at an undisclosed location. With
the evidence in hand it hadn’t been hard to convince him that his former
associates would have no problem with cutting their losses by whatever measures
they could. Suddenly hiding out under the care of the Pinkertons
and the Barkleys, waiting to give evidence, seemed
the better alternative. The note left for his secretary said he had been called
to
It had barely given Heath
the time he needed to travel south and locate the remote village where Audra
was being held captive.
The wagon stopped moving
jogging him back to the present. It was with relief that the finally saw the daylight
light beginning to dim as it filtered through the hay.
“We make camp up ahead, in
the clearing.” The burly soldier in charge of the group had kept them traveling
as late as he dared. The roads were rough and not to be trusted after dark.
“Tie and gag them both for
the night.” One of the guards climbed in the wagon and bound both girls to the
supports by the wrists. “Buenas noches, Senoritas.” He ignored the younger girl but
took the opportunity run his hands over Audra. Dressed in peasant garb, he had
easy access to her and slipped his hands inside her blouse, fondling her
breasts.
Audra tried to hide her fear
but didn't succeed. The man could see it in her eyes and it made him bolder.
Remembering the conversation
from earlier in the day he smiled. “Perhaps I will try a taste of what Senor
Alvarado is saving for himself, eh?” She felt his hand snake its way under her
skirt and up her thigh.
Unable to move or shout all
Audra could do was shut her eyes. Beneath the hay, Heath was in a panic,
needing to find a way to help his sister without ruining their chances for
escape. He was at the point of revealing himself when the silence was shattered
by a gunshot and a weight dropped across her body.
“Let that be a lesson to the
rest of you!” It was the leader of the band and he had the entire company’s
attention. “He’s lucky I shot him. The next one of you who touches her I will
give to Senor Alvarado to deal with.”
CHAPTER
6.
Heath exhaled and tried to
calm the fierce shaking that had overtaken him. He waited until the only sounds
were those of the night.
As he waited his mind
drifted back over the events of the last few days.
For once looking like Tom
Barkley’s son hadn’t been to his advantage. Blue-eyed blonds weren’t common
place in
Lucky for him, listening was
something he was good at. Nick sure would have been a liability in that area,
though with all that was at stake, he would have forced himself to. Nick was
capable of tremendous self-discipline when he needed to be. You only had to
look at him running the ranch to know that.
The ranch. He sighed. Would Nick really sell it? Well, he’d at
least managed to put it off by not leaving him the Power-of-Attorney. It hurt
to know that Nick would go so far as to sell the ranch to help Mother and
Jarrod, but had just walked away from Heath over their Bentell
plan.
Stop it! Wallowing in self-pity isn’t gonna help you
now Heath Barkley! What would help now would be an army of ranch hands riding
over the hill to the rescue. Dream on
He shifted and his arm
started throbbing again, a reminder that finding Audra’s location hadn’t been
easy. His one asset had been Jose Maldonado. Jose had a hated of Alvarado that
rivaled his own. The young man had lost everything to one of Alvarado’s rages.
The banditos had come and set fire to the village in the night, all because
they were too poor to pay the tribute the big man demanded. Jose had been too
restless to sleep that night and had left the stifling hut he shared with his
family. It was the only thing that had kept him from burning to death or being
shot with the rest of his village.
The example was still
whispered about locally. Alvarado had made his point. The bandit leader new Jose
had survived, but deemed it better to let him live. It would be harder for
others to forget the lesson if Jose was there as a constant reminder.
When rumors of the blond
girl at the convent began to circulate Jose stored them away. Information was
valuable. Eventually he’d left remote backwoods village and gone to work in a
nearby border town. He’d almost given up on the value of his knowledge when
more rumors reached him. An Americano man was asking lots of questions and
Alvarado was coming home. They had to be related.
He tracked down the stranger
who was very good at remaining invisible. Jose watched him for two days trying
to make up his mind.
Heath was aware of the
scrutiny, but not of the purpose. It was risky, but he was becoming
increasingly desperate for information and decided that the watcher might be
his only chance. Slipping, ghost-like, into an alleyway, he lured the young Mexican
after him. The boy stepped into the darkened passage and stopped, waiting for
his eyes to adjust. Too late he realized his mistake. The knife at his throat
made it clear that the watched had also been the watcher.
“You and I are going to have
a talk.”
Silence.
“You have information I
need. Give it to me and I will let you live.”
Jose gambled. “You come for
the girl.”
The statement surprised
Heath and gave Jose the split second of advantage he needed. He moved with the
speed of a manchild forced to survive on
the streets. Seconds later it was Heath on the ground, a knee
across his the back of his neck and bleeding from a gash on his arm.
Jose tied his hands behind him.
“Now you and I will talk.”
He led him through back alleys to a nondescript hut.
With the knife at his
throat, Heath had little choice but to answer Jose’s questions. The blade had
already drawn blood once and he didn’t have the energy to fight.
“Who is she?”
“My little
sister.” Jose looked the man over
and judged this could be true. From what he’d heard they had similar coloring.
Besides, he was good at reading eyes and the man’s told him it was true.
“How does she come to be
here?”
“Alvarado holds her for a rich
American who would see my family destroyed.” Heath told him briefly about the
election.
All of the pain and loss of
that night two years ago came rushing back and the Mexican lashed out with a
brutal backhand that drew blood. “You should have taken better care of her,
Senor.”
Heath weighed whether to
answer or not. This man wasn’t as easy as most to read. Judging that he had
little to lose, he nodded, “I know.”
Old eyes in a young face
bored into him. “Tell me about your family!”
“My brothers, my sister, our
Mother...”
“Where is your Father?”
“Dead, killed
by the railroads when he wouldn’t let them take our neighbors’ land.”
Jose moved to the other side
of the small room, into the shadows and sat on his haunches to think. Heath
watched, knowing that whatever deliberation was going on in the man’s mind, it
would decide his entire family’s fate.
The minutes slid by. Voices
in the street rose and fell, the sound of late night
arguments and camaraderie. A dog barked until someone kicked it to silence. The
sound of music from some nearby cantina drifted through the rude window.
Still Heath waited while the
silent unmoving man waged whatever private war was being fought in his mind and
heart. Without any sign from one moment to the next it was decided. He uncoiled
and rose from the crouch, knife poised to strike. The blade arced downward
before Heath could react, slicing the leather thongs that bound his wrists.
In the next moment the knife
was handed back to him. “You will rest tonight then I will take you to where
they are keeping her.” The eyes that looked in his were filled with
incomprehensible sadness. “I will need to take care of your arm.”
It had taken the better part
of their three days on the road for Heath to pry the story behind his sudden
cooperation out of the young man. In the end, he’d refused to let Jose help
with the rescue.
“I won’t risk the last of
your family to Alvarado.”
“I have no more family Senor
Heath.”
“But you will someday. Bring
them to
“I can help you with this.
Please, let me honor the memory of my parents by helping you!”
Heath thought it over. Seeing
the determination on the other man’s face and how much it meant to him, he
relented. Alright Jose, but you do what I say, agreed?
“Agreed
Heath.”
Not long after he waited
until the young man’s back was turned, he hit him over the head leaving him
carefully tucked away where he could be freed later.
“You already honor your
family, Jose.”
He made his way to the
Convent of the Holy Sorrows.
CHAPTER
7.
The night music had been
undisturbed long enough.
Burrowing out of the hay he
clamped a hand over the sleeping novice’s mouth and nose, holding on only long
enough to make her pass out. Then he quietly apologized before hitting her over
the head with his gun.
Fortunately, the gags had
stifled both prisoners’ shock at his appearance from out of nowhere.
“You always were a pushover.” They were the
first words she uttered when she could speak again, whispered by lips held
close to his ear. The depth of relief and love that Heath saw in her blue eyes
matched what he was feeling.
“Must be, I’m here, ain’t
I?” He grinned at her and cut the ropes holding her wrists.
“I’m awful sorry about
earlier, Honey. Did he….?” He held her close and kissed the top of her head.
“Shhh,
don’t think about it. It’s over and nothing happened.” He could smell the tang
of blood on the straw, see where the flies were
crawling over the stains. It wasn’t nothing, but
they’d deal with it later, for now they needed to get away. Heath marveled at
what a strong woman she had grown into. The Audra he’d known a year ago would
have fallen apart. He hoped that the rest of her captivity had been gentler.
“You’d better change into
these, we need to get going. Any idea where he posted
guards.”
“There are only three, one
by the road at either end of the clearing and one by the fire. No one is
expecting trouble.”
“Not bad for a little
princess.” He flashed her one of his lop-sided grins.
“You’ll pay for that.” She
punched his arm lightly and hoped she’d get to keep the promise. So did he. They both knew that this was just the beginning of a
dangerous journey.
Moving silently, Heath and
Audra inched towards the open end of the wagon and waited. After what seemed
like hours the moon finally disappeared behind the scudding clouds and they
stole off into the woods back towards the town they’d left that afternoon, Stopping only to brush off the hay that clung to them, they
left their trace for the pursuers to find, then doubled back.
Circling around the camp,
Heath angled them downhill until he could hear the splashing of water running
over rocks.
They headed up stream,
walking in the water to leave no tracks. The fickle moonlight made it hard, and
both would have missed the horses hidden in the undergrowth if it hadn’t been
for the sudden break through of the moon.
The horses fared no better
in the stream and it was slow going. Their mounts kept trying to head for dry
land, and Heath was tempted to indulge them. It would be easier to make good
time. But his intuition told him that the Sisters were better judges of how to
escape Javier Alvarado than he was so he held to the water as they’d suggested
and pushed on, beyond exhaustion. Once across the ridge line, the stream
disappeared. The travel was faster but they still stuck to cover.
Alvarado’s men rampaged
through the countryside. Heath and Audra
stuck to the trees as much as they could, traveling at dusk and dawn and
sheltering during the daylight hours when they would be easily spotted. Their
meals were eaten cold more often than not, and the fare was meager. They
huddled together at night for warmth. Despite the privations, both enjoyed the
time together. In years to come they would often reminisce about the long quiet
talks that had cemented their relationship and deepened their understanding of
the special bond that the Barkleys shared.
They traveled through the
first night, wanting to put as much distance behind them as possible. By the
time Heath pulled them to a halt at mid morning horses and riders were equally
bone weary.
“Heath?”
“You should be sleeping
Sis.”
"I can’t.” She shifted
onto her side and moved closer to him, shivering. The day was warm, all the fear of the last six months was finally
catching up with her. Strong arms wrapped around her and held her tight. “I got
ya Sis.”
“I was so afraid no one was
going to come…”
“I know.”
“The longer I was there, I thought you had all given up on me.”
“You should know better than
that, Audra Barkley.” He chided her.
“I kept hoping and hoping. I
expected to see Nick or Jarrod, kept praying every day that they would ride in
and rescue me." She was crying quietly, talking is fits and starts between
the sobs. “And then they said that Alvarado was coming back for me….” She
shivered again, knowing what would have happened. “I would have killed myself
Heath. I would have found a way before I let him do that to me.” He placed his
cheek against the top of her head as she buried it against his chest. “Shhhh, shhhhh, it’s over now.” He
was crying too.
“I won’t go back with them
if they catch us. Promise me Heath, you won’t let them take me back. I’d rather
die.”
“Audra, it ain’t gonna
happen. I won’t let it.” His heart was filled with a fierce protectiveness,
he would keep her safe if it took his last ounce of courage and strength. He
would get her back to the family that loved her so that they could become whole
again.
He hugged her tighter and
she fell into a fitful sleep.
Readying the horse to travel
again as the sun slipped lower in the sky, Audra asked the question that had
been troubling her since their escape. “Heath, where are Jarrod and Nick? How
is it that you’re here?”
With that, Heath began the
long explanation of what had transpired in the weeks and months that she’d been
missing.
As time went by Alvarado
widened his search. They began to see patrols on the roads as they approached
the border. The final night, they found themselves hunkered down in the rocks
above the border garrison of Suarez.
“Looks
like we’re almost there, Sis.”
It had been a good ten days,
with lots of time to talk and enjoy each other’s company, but they’d avoided
the one subject that they needed to talk about most, the one that would set the
tone for the future of their relationship.
“It hurt when you left.”
“I know Sis. You were the
last one I wanted to hurt. But I just couldn’t stay. I tried it their way and
it just wasn’t gonna work.”
“We fired Bentell shortly after you left.”
“Why?”
“Because even though it was
too little too late, it was what we needed to do.”
“Why are you including
yourself in that?”
“I could have stood up to
them, could have forced them to see what they were doing to you.”
He shook his head and smiled
at her. “Boy Howdy, you do take a lot on yourself. They’re all adults Audra,
they shoulda been able to see for themselves.”
“I know it doesn’t count for
much, but we never meant to hurt you.”
“Well, you know what they
say about the road to Hell.” His words were bitter.
“Oh Heath, I wish we could
find a way to show you how much we regret that decision.”
When the silence between
them had stretched on too long, she broke it. “What did you do when you left?”
She asked it casually but he know she was worried about him, and rightfully so.
She knew the depth of the pain he’d been feeling.
He pulled her closer. “I was
kinda angry, did a lotta
drinking and fighting.”
“Oh Heath,
no! You were always so patient
and good about walking away from a fight. Why?”
“I’d ended up back outside
Spanish Camp, wantin’ to be a Deputy again. But I was
too wild. Sam finally had me arrested and thrown in a work camp for seven
months.” Too her surprise, he was grinning.
“Oh Heath,
no not prison!”
“Well, not really, Sam was
real careful. Made sure I ended up in his neck of the woods. The judge and the
fellow runnin’ the place were good friends of his. I
think they had a deal about workin’ me hard so’s I could get rid of the mad I was carrying around. If I
didn’t know better I’d say he set the whole thing up. Probably could have
walked out of there any time, but I stuck it out.”
“Sam sounds pretty smart.”
“That he is. I wouldn’t be
surprised to find out there’s no record of my being arrested or sentenced.”
“Is that why it took you so
long to come?
“Uh huh. I didn’t know what had happened until I got back to
Spanish Camp. Saw the headline in an old newspaper in the kindling box.”
CHAPTER
8.
The next afternoon’s
conversation was more painful. Heath felt the need to fill her in on what had
happened to the family in her absence.
“Poor
Jarrod.” She had cried most of
the night for her lost siblings and mother. Trying to imagine Nick without his
fire, her mother detached, just going through the motions of daily life was
hard enough. Hearing about her beloved oldest brother and his descent into
self-destructive guilt was too much to bear.
“Heath, how am I going to
convince him this wasn’t his fault! What are we
supposed to do, live our lives in constant fear of what could happen?”
“Audra, honey, we’ll do our
best to make it right when we get back. I promise.”
“We? You’re coming back to the ranch?”
He shrugged. “Gotta be a ranch to come back to.”
Her eyes were alarmed, “What
do you mean?”
“Nick was talking about
selling and taking them back East, someplace where there are no memories.”
“You didn’t answer my
question. Would you come back?” She was afraid of his answer.
“Yeah, if
y’all are willin’ to have me. I missed ya’ somethin’ awful in spite of tryin’ to tell myself I didn’t.”
She hugged him then, and
they curled up together for warmth in the cool of the night. “Just you try and
get away again big brother.”
“Nick wasn’t any too pleased
to see me, honey. Don’t get your hopes up.”
They ate the last of the
food they’d been carrying, along with some berries Audra had picked along the
way.
“Look down there Audra.” He
pointed to a dust cloud traveling up the road. Over the next hour several small
herds of sheep arrived outside the town.
“Must be
market day.”
Alvarado’s men had been patrolling
the approaches to the town for two days. Until now there had been no hope of getting
past them. Suddenly Heath had an idea. “Get the sheepskin off your horse and
follow me.”
“What are you thinking
Heath?”
“Can you say ‘Baa’?” He gave
her that lazy half-smile of his and her eyes widened to saucers.
“No way! You’re crazy!” He was about to argue with her when
the glint in her eye caught his attention. “Nick will never let us live this
down.”
“I won’t tell him if you
don’t, Sis.”
They grabbed the sheepskins
that had served as saddle blankets, wrapped them around their shoulders and
headed down the short incline to await the approaching
dusk.
The herds were bedding down
for the night. “We’re gonna work our way in a little and stay down. We’ll have
the whole night to inch closer to the gate. Just in case, keep your eyes open
and meet me inside at the Sheriff’s office if we get separated.”
It was a good plan as far as
he’d thought it out. But they were left with a hundred feet to cover between
the herd and the gate, and the patrols were constant. The night slipped away
Heath realized that the covering darkness would be gone in another hour or so.
He needed a plan and he needed one now.
“Audra, get ready to run.”
He nudged her in the side, making sure she was awake.
“What are you going to do?”
“I’m gonna start a
stampede.”
“Heath!...”
“Just do as I say and run
for the gate when all Hell breaks loose.”
Heath started to mill around
in the herd, unsettling them. Most folks thought sheep were pretty harmless,
but get enough of them riled and running in the same direction and they could
be just as dangerous as cattle. He hoped Audra was paying attention.
Finding a couple of lambs,
he grabbed them and took them from their mothers. The plaintive bleating roused
not only the rest of the herd, but the peasants as well. It was still too dark
to see, but Heath herd comments of “lobo” and smiled. It was time for his best
imitation of a wolf. The sheep weren’t fooled, but the shepherds were and soon
there were cries of “wolf” echoing across the field. At that point Heath went
for broke and shot into the air. The milling animals took off in running
straight for the adobe wall of the town. Hunched over and wearing the
sheepskins, Heath and Audra followed suit. They were almost there when one of
the Mexican banditos spotted them and shouted to his compadres.
The dust and darkness made
it hard for any but the nearest of the guards to see them as they ran. Damn! It almost worked! He crouched
among the running animals and took aim, hitting the man bearing down on Audra,
giving her the extra time she needed to make it to safety.
“Heath!” She stopped running when she heard the gunfire
behind her. It was only momentum that carried her through the archway into the
waiting arms of the soldiers who had gathered at the first signs of commotion.
Seeing their quarry make it
to safety, one of the other Mexicans roared and wheeled around bearing down on
Heath with his horse. His first shot hit the cowboy in the injured arm, the
second in his shoulder.
Heath reacted instinctively,
not thinking about the odds of success. With only two bullets left there was
going to be one chance. He ran to his left, angling directly toward the gate
then wheeled and stood his ground until the last instant. He emptied the gun
into the man who was bearing down on him then tossed it aside. In the next
breath he grabbed the stirrup of the galloping horse with his good arm as the
animal ran full tilt towards the gate of the town.
“Does your brother always
make such dramatic entrances, Miss Barkley?
“Why yes, as a mater of
fact. You should have seen his introduction to the family.”
Smiling at the puzzled look
on the Major’s face, she simply said “I’ll explain later.”
“You’re givin’
me a bad name, Sis.”
“Well look who decided to
join us.” She kissed his forehead.
“Doesn’t this family know
any other greeting?”
She furrowed her brow in
puzzlement but decided to let it pass. “How are you feeling?”
“A mite battered, but okay.”
“Well you’ll have some time
to rest. You’re not going anywhere until the reinforcements from
“Pleased to meet ya’. Don’t
be takin’ this the wrong way, Major, but we have some
important business up north and need to be leaving right away.”
“No offense taken, Mr.
Barkley,” he smiled at the young man, “But right now it would be rather
dangerous for you to try to leave. I’ve sent for reinforcements who should be
here by the tomorrow evening. They’ll escort you to the nearest town with a
rail connection. In the meantime I’d suggest you both rest.
They’d traveled nonstop by
rail for three days, making good connections. Both were anxious to get home, but
at the same time afraid of what they might find. For the first time in years,
Heath found himself praying. Lord please help me to make it right.
The buggy raised a cloud of
dust that could be seen for a good mile. Nick wasn’t expecting anyone, no one came to visit anymore unannounced. He stood in the stirrups looking down from
the hill just behind the house, trying to get a better view of the visitors.
Suddenly, two blond heads
could be made out and his heart started to pound. It was all he could do to
hold back until he was certain. Duke looked up from his spot on the corral
fence at the first whoop thinking there was trouble. But this was Nick yelling
for joy and racing toward the carriage in the distance.
“What’s that all about
boss?”
“If I don’t miss my guess,
things are gonna be looking up around here.” He headed for the barn calling for
Ciego.
Heath pulled the surrey to a
stop and they watched Nick’s flight of joy.
Audra stepped down and away, holding her arms out the way she had when
they’d been children. In a flurry of hooves she was there and then gone…lifted
high over the saddle, sitting in front of her brother. The two of them rode
wild across the pasture, Nick’s arm around her waist, holding her to him like a
lost piece of his heart.
Heath grinned and started
the surrey up, continued on to meet the crowd that was gathering in the yard.
“You always did know how to make
an entrance, Heath.” Duke took his hand the minute he was on the ground.
“So my sister says.”
“Your
SISTER?”
“Yeah.” The red crept up his face. “This family is damned
hard to get out of your system.”
“First smart thing you’ve
said in a long time, son.” The ranch foreman clapped him on the shoulder and they
waited for the two riders just entering the yard.
CHAPTER
9.
Nick brought
“Thank you Ciego, it’s good to see the faces of friends again.” She
kissed him on the cheek.
“HmmHmmm,
about time you got back, Missy. Seems to me there’s a couple a strays around
here that you promised you were gonna take care of!”
“Oh Duke,
what an awful thing to say about my brothers!” The hands standing nearby snickered as Nick scowled
for best effect.
She turned to Duke McCall
and was in his arms engulfed in a bear hug. “It’s good to have you back little
girl. Hattie and me missed you.” His voice was
unusually gruff and the hands saw their foreman cry for the one and only time in
memory.
“I missed you too, Uncle
Duke.”
While Audra was being
greeted by those of the crew who knew her, Nick wheeled around and fixed Heath
with a sharp “You!”
Heath looked down, suddenly
unsure of whether he was welcome. A pair of black boots appeared in his line of
sight. “Well, I’m talkin’ to you BOY!”
The blood drained from
Heath’s face as he heard the hated form of address. Two years melted away and
he was the same rootless soul that no one wanted soiling their good name. He
turned to leave.
Nick had intended it as
teasing but realized too late how fragile the moment was for his brother. He
reached out and grabbed the retreating shoulder but was shrugged off.
“Heath, don’t. Don’t leave. I
was teasing. You belong here.” The younger man turned and saw a much chastened
Nick with his hat in his hand. “We need you here Heath,
family just isn’t complete without you.”
“Sorry Nick, guess I’m just
a might…touchy.”
“Maybe I should wire Sam to
arrange another ‘camping trip’ for you.”
His arm went around the shorter man’s shoulders and pulled him close. “Just
see if you get away again little brother.” They walked back toward the crowd.
Just out of earshot Nick turned and whispered in Heath’s ear “I’m sorry.”
The excited chattering
around them died down. Fearing that others might have witnessed the scene
between him and his brother, Heath looked at the faces and realized that they
were focused elsewhere. Placing a hand on Audra’s shoulder, he turned her and hand-in-hand
they walked in the direction of everyone’s gaze, through the crowd of men and
up to the diminutive white haired lady standing on the porch of the mansion.
“Let’s go inside Mother.” He
gently guided the still unbelieving woman through the door.
Nick followed behind and
bellowed “SILAS!” as loud as he could.
“Lord amercy Mister Nick, you don’t gotta be yellin’ that way get me ta’come…”
The family retainer stopped in mid sentence and just stared at the two young
people as though he was seeing a ghost…or a miracle.
“Howdy
Silas.” Heath grinned and took
the vase from the older man before his shaking hands lost their hold on it.
“Silas.”
“Oh Miss Audra, oh praise
God, you be home safe. Child, this house has been so empty without you.” For
only the second time in her life she saw him cry. The first had been at her Father’s
funeral. Ignoring his usual decorum he swept the young woman into his arms and hugged
her for all he was worth.
Oblivious to the crowd
watching, she brushed a tear from his cheek and planted a tender kiss there
then wrapped an arm around his waist and whispered in his ear.
“Oh you bet child.” He
planted a kiss on her cheek and rushed off to the kitchen leaving Heath still
holding the base of flowers.
“Hey
Silas, what about these?”
“Oh you just puts them down anywheres Mr.
Heath. I gotta make some ginger snaps.”
Heath just rolled his eyes
and handed the vase to Nick. “Here, find a home for these.”
“Why me? Hey, Heath…”
“Oh for
goodness sake. You two aren’t
back together one hour and you’re already picking on each other.” It was hard
for
“Now Mother, that’s not
fair! I didn’t start it!”
“
“Makes a
right tasty combination if you ask me.” Duke grinned across his boss while the women snickered as he dipped
another cookie into his glass.
An hour later, Audra set
down the glass of champagne she’d been sipping and asked, “Mother, where’s
Jarrod?”
“Yes please.”
“Just don’t be disappointed
sweetheart.” The sadness in
Heath and Nick remained
behind, pouring themselves something stronger than the celebratory champagne
that had been opened.
With Audra and their Mother
out of the room Nick was ill at ease with his brother. He started to speak a
number of times but then seemed to think better of it.
Heath finally lost patience
and chided him good-naturedly “Never thought I’d see you at a loss for words,
big brother.”
The last two words made him
hold his breath as he searched Heath’s face for meaning.
As the silence between them
stretched on, Nick finally said the two words that he’d been
needing to say since the day Heath had ridden in six weeks before.
“Heath…I...I’m sorry.”
The words were simple but in
them Heath heard all of the anguish and regret that Nick would never be able to
express openly. And he heard another emotion as well, fear. Nick was afraid
that they would lose him again. They had
Audra back, but the family wouldn’t be complete without him as well.
He made his way over to the
mantle where his brother stood staring into the fire and crying silently.
Placing a hand on the leather clad shoulder, he looked
into the flames as well. “I ain’t goin’ anywhere
Nick.”
Upstairs
Audra searched her Mother’s
face for some sign of what lay beyond the door to her brother’s bedroom.
“Why Mother, why this
reaction?”
“He blames himself. If he
hadn’t run for Attorney General, if he hadn’t been so tenacious in fighting
corruption, if he hadn’t gone along with me on Bentell.
You know how Jarrod is. He takes his role as head of the family seriously.”
“But Mother, how could he
have known what would happen?” Audra knew she wasn’t saying anything that
hadn’t been said to Jarrod over and over. She’d heard it enough times right
after Heath had left. He’d blamed himself for not taking the time to understand
what was going through Heath’s mind rather than looking at the ‘greater good’.
No matter that Nick and Mother had agreed with the plan. Jarrod had always felt
that the responsibility for any failure had to rest with him in his role as
head of the family.
“He feels responsible for
all the losses of this past year, like he’s failed everyone and hurt us all by it.
Guilt is an ugly weapon darling, and it’s one he’s using on himself.”
“Heath told me he’s been
hurting himself.” Her voice choked with sorrow.
“Yes, he has. There are scars
on his arms. You need to be prepared for that.”
“What should I do Mother?”
“I think all you can do is
just love him and hope that time will do the rest.”
She left her daughter at the door and returned downstairs. Passing the closed study
door, she decided that maybe she’d let that conversation run its course as
well.
“Silas, let’s see about
dinner.”
“Yes M’am,
Mrs. Barkley. It’s nice to have you back.”
“Don’t you mean them,
Silas?”
“That too,
Mrs. Barkley.”
Audra knocked on the bedroom
door then let herself in.
Jarrod was seated in the
armchair that provided a view of the pastures behind the house. He preferred
this view to the corrals that were visible from his brothers’ windows. She
stood for a moment and took in the changes. Here was her hero and second
father. He was painfully thin, drawn and haggard. His sleeves were rolled up
and she could see the ugly pink scars that covered his forearms. He sat so
still that he could have been a mannequin.
Regaining her composure, she
crossed over to him and quietly spoke his name.
“Jarrod?”
When there was no answer,
she tried again, placing her hands on his face and turning him toward her.
“Jarrod, it’s me, Audra, I’m home Jarrod, I’m home at last.”
CHAPTER
10.
The transformation at the
ranch since Heath and Audra’s return had been nothing short of miraculous. The
only lingering sad note was Jarrod. Where Victoria, Nick and their friends felt
as though they were waking from the dead, Jarrod still had not responded to his
brother’s and sister’s homecoming.
A week later, Howard was at
the house to check up on both Jarrod and Audra. He was pleased to hear that
“I was so afraid, Mother. It
almost doesn’t matter that they never touched me. They would look and laugh,
make crude gestures. One fellow, he started to…..” She blushed and shuddered at
the thought. It was so out of place here in the refined setting of the mansion.
Her life had been so different for all those months, she sometimes wondered if
she’d ever feel completely comfortable here again. “Anyway, the guard who was in charge stopped
him….” The tears that she had been holding in for months finally came.
“Oh, Honey.”
Howard was still optimistic about
Jarrod, despite his continued detachment. He was of the opinion that Jarrod
knew that Heath and Audra were back but wasn’t ready to trust the truth of it
yet.
“You can’t expect miracles
“But why can’t he accept
what he sees?”
“
“No, no, I thought I was dreaming.”
“I’m sure he thinks that as
well or that he’s seeing what he wants to see, not what was missing. The
thinking part of him isn’t willing to believe this is real yet. You’ll have to
just give it time.”
“I’m sure you’re right
Howard, it’s just so frustrating.” She walked the family friend to his buggy.
“Has there been any change
in his behavior at all?”
“Well, he’s been eating
better, but he still spends his days in his room, looking out at the pastures
or reading.”
As if having a second thought
she added, “He does stare at all of us a great deal though.”
Dinner that night was
lively, full of good-natured teasing some of it even directed at Jarrod, though
he didn’t respond. They had decided to act as though nothing was wrong, at
least as far as possible. After dinner coffee was served in the Billiard room.
Jarrod headed silently to
his room as was his habit, but then stopped at the top of the steps. The sound
of laughter from the downstairs was drawing him. The voices down there, mingled
and carefree, pulled at him causing a longing that he couldn’t control to rise
up. The desire to be there…his memories stirred. He remembered being among
them, laughing and sharing the close moments. He remembered feeling loved and
secure. It seemed like lifetimes since he’d felt that way.
The desire to feel that love
again overwhelmed him. The possibility that what lay through the open doorway
was merely his imaginings terrified him. He made his way down the stairs and
stood just outside the door, drinking in the sensations of warmth and belonging
that those voices awoke in him. His heart was begging for it to be true, for
the voices to belong to people who existed in that room, not just in his mind.
He’d been living in his mind so much lately that he wasn’t sure what was real
anymore.
Each of them
followed his progress, silent, unsure of what to make of it. He walked to the
billiard table and rolled one of the balls under his hand. It was such a
typical Jarrod thing to do. He felt the smooth hardness under his hand and told
himself, This is real.
“Jarrod?” Heath
walked over to stand near him.
Jarrod looked at
him with a fierce concentration as everyone in the room held their breath. His
eyes shifted to Audra and pinned her with the same intense scrutiny. Finally
his eyes fell to the billiard table and he rolled the ball he’d been playing
with into a corner pocket.
“It’s…I’m…I.”
The words simply stopped as though that had been the full thought.
“You’re really
here? Both of you?” His heart raced and the blood
roared in his ears as he sank to the floor. The shaking started as a small
tremor in his hands and began to grow. “Please, I need to be alone.
Please….leave me a...”
“No way Jarrod. Not alone, not again.” Heath sat beside him laying an arm
around his shoulders, feeling the quaking in muscle and bone.
“Please!” He
was desperate, losing control and afraid of what was coming.
“Heath’s right, big brother. We’re not leaving.” Nick eyed his mother, who nodded.
“I think I’ll
have my coffee on the verandah, it’s really quite lovely with the roses in
bloom.” She picked up her cup and turned toward the French doors that lead
outside. Catching Nick’s eye, she nodded in a wordless request to ‘Take care of
him.’
Jarrod hugged
his knees as the shaking became stronger.
The room was already warm from the lingering heat of the day but he
shook as if it were mid-winter, the spasms coming in waves. Heath sidled in
closer taking his weight, lending support, speaking quietly in his ear. “Just
let it come big brother, let it out. It needs out.”
Nick was at his
other side, his hand keeping up a steady rhythm as he rubbed Jarrod’s back to
relax him. Audra sat on the rug in front
of him, her hand on his.
Eventually the
tremors peaked, shaking the tired body with a bone rattling ferocity. The siblings
held on then, supporting and protecting, waiting out the storm that tore through
the man who had been their protector and guide. Now it was their turn, so they kept
vigil until a change in the movement under their touch bespoke that shock had
given way to grief. Still they sat as their Pappy cried out the loneliness and
loss of the last few months. Eventually,
that storm spent as well, the muscles under their hands relaxed and a
companionable silence settled between them. Each followed a personal trail of
thoughts, unaware of the startling similarity between them. What had been lost would be restored. There
was still more work to do, but somehow, now, it seemed within reach.
As the long
minutes ticked away, Jarrod finally looked up, meeting Heath’s gaze, smiling
faintly. Released from the weight of his self-recriminations, he felt almost
giddy. Though his eyes were red-rimmed and swollen they held some of the old
sparkle that had been a fixture until recently.
Flashing a lopsided grin, Heath held his breath, but then Jarrod lost
his momentary lightness and turned to Nick.
“Brother Nick?”
“Yeah, Pappy?” Nick
wasn’t certain what to expect.
“Why are making
us sit on the floor? My butt hurts.”
The look on
Nick’s face was a once in a lifetime experience. Heath, Jarrod and Audra found
themselves doubled over in uncontrollable laughter as the middle and most
gullible brother sputtered his indignant outrage. Finally, the realization that
Jarrod had made a joke struck him. In that moment his own laugh of sheer
exaltation rang out.
Nick took a
deep breath and snatched one of the pillows that decorated the furniture and
threw it. “Well here, Pappy. If your butt’s so sore USE THIS!”
That was all it
took. The three men erupted in a raucous battle, flinging the multitude of
tapestry and velvet pillows at one another, while Audra retreated to the billiard
table, lobbing pillows from a safe distance.
Heath and
Jarrod joined forces, ganging up on their middle brother. Nick managed to get
the settee between himself and his attackers and returned blow for blow until
Heath caught one of his arms and pulled him over. Almost helpless at the sight
of Nick with his feet in the air, Heath was fair game. Jarrod saw an
opportunity, grabbed up the pillows within reach and began a merciless
onslaught of his blond brother.
Outside
Nick struggled
to right himself, feet flailing, ending up on the floor in a heap. The sight
set Heath and Audra to laughing even harder making it impossible for Heath to defend
himself. Jarrod’s volley of overstuffed ammunition caught him open mouthed and
toppled the blond onto his brother.
Jarrod was the
first to tire. Dragging himself to the couch, gasping between belly laughs, he
settled in and exalted in how good it felt to be himself. It felt….like being
born again, like coming into the light after being alone in the dark for so
long. Audra curled up next to him and lost herself in the warmth of his
embrace.
While Heath
joined him there Nick poured the three of them a whiskey and their sister a sherry.
Handing the glasses around, he grinned at his big brother and made a toast, “To
the four of us!”
EPILOGUE
It wasn’t long
before Audra was asleep.
“You want me to
carry her upstairs, Pappy?”
“No thanks
Nick, it’s been too long since I’ve had her to spoil. It feels good.”
Heath looked
over at his two siblings and chuckled. “You don’t look like your gonna last
much longer yourself, big brother.”
Jarrod’s face
sparked with joy at the words. Over the next few weeks they would all learn
that he had become a much more open man with his feelings. “Have I thanked you
properly for what you did Heath?”
“No need for
that.”
Jarrod eyed him
and he stifled a yawn.
“What? Don’t
tell me you’re already bored with having me around?”
“No, just
wondering how you’re going to react to what I have to say.”
Nick went from
content to concerned. “Pappy, maybe we should leave
things for another day.” He’d been enjoying the interplay between his brothers
and didn’t want to see all the old problems dragged out so soon.
“Naw, it’s okay Nick. Let the
lawyer say his peace. You know he’s just gonna badger us until he does.”
A pillow hit
him mid chest.
“I just wanted
to say I’m sorry Heath. I know those words don’t even begin to come close to
making up for what I put you through. I don’t know if or when you’ll ever trust
me again the way I’d like you to. I know it doesn’t matter that I had what I
thought were your best interests at heart. None of that matters. I was wrong…we
were wrong, and we hurt you terribly, and even this silver tongued lawyer
doesn’t have the words to make it right.”
Heath looked
deep into the amber liquid that still sat in his glass. “Maybe Nick is right
Jarrod, maybe this is a subject for another day.” He looked up and smiled at
his oldest brother.
“Fair enough
brother Heath.” He raised his glass and saluted the blond cowboy. “Thank you
for bringing Audra home.”
“Here, here!”
Nick raised his glass as well.
Heath came to with
a start in the wee hours of the morning. All of them had fallen asleep there as
they talked, Nick on the floor, Jarrod stretched out on the settee, and himself
in the leather armchair. Audra must have awoken and wandered up to bed at some
point. Nudging the body on the floor with the pointed toe of his boot, he
dragged Nick upright and sent him out the door to bed. Bleary-eyed, he looked
at Heath and mumbled “Welcome home, little brother.”
Starting to
wake Jarrod, Heath thought better of it. Who new the last time the man had
gotten any real rest? Moving the afghan from the back of the settee over the
sleeping man, he grabbed another blanket from across the room and settled into
to the armchair to keep watch.
“Welcome home,
big brother.”