SECRET WISH

i have a secret wish
that you could LOVE ME
for a thousand lifetimes,
reaching, holding, praying, staying
saving yourself
     to be all mine

i have a secret wish
that i could be
All Things to you,
     as you already are to me

that i could capture
all the waves
and not let them
     slip out to sea

that i could hold you
with my soul,
and in your capture,
let you believe
       that you are free

that i could have
all your remaining tomorrows,
and walk hand-in-hand
     through whatever will be

so now you know my secret,
no longer can i hide
swallow your pride!
let me inside,
     let me comfort
     your storms of strife,
     allow this Love into your life.
--CRONIN DETZZ



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SECRET WISH
Written Jan. 1996
Inspiration
After my boyfriend broke up with me, I realized that I should have held onto him...loosely.  This is the reason for the stanza, "that i could hold you / with my soul, / and in your capture, / let you believe / that you are free."   I wanted to possess him, and "capture all the waves / and not let them / slip out to sea."  This relationship was simply not meant to endure, and it wasn't until later in the year (when I met my future husband) that I was able to accept this.  After I met my husband, I learned that love unrequitted is not an acceptable relationship.


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