| DAY 5 |
| DAY5 The final day of our incredible journey started out with a bang. Well actually, it was more of a squish. I awoke to find my hands covered with a thick creamy substance (shut up!) apparently, CJ, Derek, Franny and Mu decided to play practical jokes on each other. This resulted in the smearing of myself with the unidentified cream that was identified as toothpaste by the scent. (You didn�t actually expect me to taste it did you?) Of course having a cool and calm temperament, I just spent the next couple of minutes swearing profusely and cursing the name �Muhammad� the dastardly deed-doer. Last night we had decided to go on a moose hunt, and we had to wake up really early to catch the �meese�. SO anyways, we changed, I grabbed my camera, cleansed myself of the filth covering my hair, and tired and bleary eyed, we started our sojourn into the morning forest. You�d think that you could learn from mistakes made in the past and try not to repeat them, but I guess I�m just a slow learner. This was just as bad as the fricking death march I had the opportunity to participate in. In our attempt to catch a glimpse of the fabled great Canadian Moose, we had to follow this treacherous trail that consisted of several wobbly log bridges, and large mud pits that sucked in many a shoe including Mu�s. The trail followed a river, so we were in mosquito home base. We had the extreme pleasure of battling the horde while finding our balance. It got so bad that we had to share a mosquito hat. This simple walk should be renamed �American Gladiator Obstacle course of doom�. Sometimes the ground just jutted up vertically and we had to crawl and climb rather than walk. We got to see a couple of cool things like a huge 500 year old tree, but it was really hard to concentrate on the beauty of mother nature with Mu in the background cussing like a drunken sailor. I guess you couldn�t blame him. The bugs were all over him! His left ear was swollen with 5 bites behind it! Well, after hiking and sweating for about a good hour, we finally reached our final destination. Dah da da da! A waterfall! Majestic in its splendor, it rose above us like a final testament of all we had accomplished the past 5 days. Of course we were all dead tired, so we didn�t give a shit. After taking a couple of pictures with the help of gregario Robb, who has shakier hands than myself, and Derek dropping his glasses into the waterfall, we ran back to catch a bit of breakfast. Breakfast kicked ass! French toast was the main course thingy. All frenchy and toasty, it made my tastebuds quiver with joy. Maybe it was because of the unusual early morning calisthenics, but I must have eaten at least 6 pieces! We also had a side platter of bananas and when they ran out our table got melons. MELONS! Mmm� After breakfast we had to participate in an �environmental protection service�. Supposedly, we were making a wooden bridge, what it really should have been called is �Monument to student ineptness� We slaved for the rest of the morning lugging logs along to form a pathway for some sort of ski trail. Now you�d think that this would be a simple task for a couple of high school students. Wrong! There was that small problem of no-cooperation kicking in again. For the entire project we had the pleasure of listening to Mu Bitch at people to hurry up the log movement, and of course there was mills, which would constantly piss the living shit out of people. Hibah got so cheesed that she wacked Mills in the knee with a log! All tucked out the student body decided on one last visit to the ol� water hole. One final chance to pants people, one final cannon ball, it was pretty interesting. Mills hit Mu with a noodle so hard he broke a pair of goggles. This time everyone was in the pool even some of the aquatically challenged like Mills and Derek, except for Chris and Sabreen. What�s to fear? Be one with your speedo! Since we weren�t allowed to enter our old cabins, we had to change in the bathroom of the Moose room. There, Andrew started a conversation about shaving his pubes, I decided to share his knowledge of the world by opening the door. Needless to say, Sabreen and Hanifah weren�t thrilled. After, we went into the moose room for some good old reminiscing and lounging around. We spent the next hour or so trying so very hard to teach Sabreen how to play �Heart and Soul� Sometimes you meet a person and they lean stuff almost immediately. Sabreen is most definitely not one of these people, no offence and all. Now I wasn�t there to witness the event, but apparently CJ was dealing cards for four people and when he realized that there was only three people playing, he swore! |
| Yes, mellow, cool as a cucumber CJ actually said and I quote �OH SHIT!� After that brief resting period, we went to the lunchroom. Lunch was a three-course meal and since it was our last meal there, we were all hoping that it would be at least edible. That would not be the case. We started out with a tomato soup. Not only was it watery, but there must have been at least an oceans worth of salt! Next on the menu were these grilled cheese sandwiches with a side of pickles. I�d like to believe that I have a cast iron stomach, but one whiff of the green monstrosities made my stomach churn. The grilled cheese sandwiches probably had no milk product whatsoever! The cheese, when it cooled became this orange piece of rubber. It kicked ass! I think the best part was you could mold the orange substance into little things like play dough. The meal go so bad that the seven of us that would normally sit together (Mu, CJ, Franny, Eugene, Vince, Derek, and I) didn�t gorge ourselves as usual, but instead opted to start a conversation about why metal teapots at Chinese restaurants are better than the porcelain teapots because the metal spout had a better pouring accuracy than the fat spout of the porcelain ones. The piece de resistance was probably the final course. Dessert. They served these tea biscuits to us that could be quite possibly the most inedible item that I had ever tasted. Made out of stale ground up cereal and quite possible sawdust, they broke down in your mouth and quickly attacked each area of your mouth choking you. After soaking in all the fluid in your mouth, it sank down in your stomach right beside that 4 pound piece of undigested gum. After lunch, we gave the cooking staff a certificate for �Making the best lunches ever�. After lunch we waited outside by the gazebo for the bus. The ride back was pretty uneventful, I was finally able to play Trainspotting, but once again, fate kicked me in the balls. Apparently I taped it at SLP, and it was too slow for the shitty VCR to play, so we saw the replacement killers. Everyone was sleeping, so we took a buncha pictures, played with CJ�s open mouth, and in no time, we arrived at the front entrance of Woburn C.I. THE END. (Finally) Wait! There�s more! Sign up now and get Questionable Quotes and other shit! Franny- �Oh my god! He said the �N� word!� (CJ said no) Mills-�One mills in the cabin is worth 1000 anywhere else� Mu-�Any chance of me getting into heaven was dashed because of this morning.� (Mu after the morning walk) Mu-�NI DI AI AI AI BOO AIEEEEEEE!� (Mu trying to sing a Chinese song) EPILOGUE THINGY So there you have it. Five days mashed into a few bytes. We all made new friends, met new people, seen people like Maria amuse us with her antics. Ideas were traded; we learned to set camp, and kill three mosquitoes with one blow. Our vocabularies have expanded. Now terms like �Roody Poo�, �Momcock�, and �Momsex� have almost become a necessity in everyday life. Yep, the thing about these trips is that although the majority of the time, the setting is crap, the food is crap, and just about everything else is crap, you can always count on your friends to spice things us a bit. And so in conclusion, I would just like to say that although the actual trip wasn�t really worth the 35$ I paid to go, getting out of school with friends made it all better. Ok, I�ll go now, but I think I�ll end it with a beautiful quote. �MILLS IS HERE BABY!� -Mills P. *Note* Mills last name actually started with an �o� |