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~Guys who have muscles and a nice car are usually trying to make up for a lost feature
~Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you�ve been up to
~They keep saying the right person will come along, I think mine got hit by a truck
~One time I tried sniffing coke but the ice cubes got stuck up my nose
~Oh my god silly me and I�m so sorry but did my back hurt your knife?
~Just remember if someone ticks you off it takes 42 muscles to frown but only 4 to lift your hand and bitch slap that mofo upside the head
~God created men first cuz you always need a rough draft before the masterpiece
~Guys are like roses-watch out for the pricks
~If barbie is so popular why do we buy her friends?
~That which does not kill me had better run fast
~There are much easier things in life than finding a good man, nailing Jell-O to a tree for instance
~Mirrors don�t talk and lucky for you they don�t laugh either
~Men are like slinkys, good for nothing, but you can�t help and smile when one falls down the stairs
~Seeing ex boyfriends is Gods way of reminding you of your mistakes
~Guys should walk around with condoms on their heads, if they�re gonna act like dicks they might as well dress like them
~Guys are like roller coasters they either give you the ride of your life or make you sick
~If a guy tells you to suck it remind him you choke on small objects
~If guys had a period they�d brag about the size of their tampon
~They say love hides behind every corner, I must be walking in circles
~People who blow kisses are lazy
~A male friend who is not a boyfriend is just a boyfriend under glass�break in case of emergency
~Girls are like telephones in a way, they like to be held and talked to, but you press the wrong button and you get disconnected
~One day your prince will come, mine just took a wrong turn got lost and is too stubborn to ask for directions
~20% Angel, 20% Devil, 20% Bitch, 20% Sweety, 20% Good, 100% Real
~Computers�hmmm�well it freezes up on me it plays games with me and I can turn it on with a push of a button, yeah pretty much call it a guy
~Don�t imagine you can change a man unless he�s in diapers
~i would be a prep but i can't seem to shove my head that far up my ass!
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