VI. The One With the Last Glimpse
by
Creedog VanDrey
Category:
Friends
Genre:
General, Fantasy (It’s really not much of a Fantasy, more or less other “Could
Have Been’s”)
Rating:
PG
Language:
English
Summery:
Season 10+ with flashbacks from who knows when. Godeerc visits for what he said will be the
last time. The gang has trouble deciding
what they’d like.
A/N: The last part. It’s finally here, after all these
years. (I kid you not.) Anyway, you know the drill, or do you? The question is not whether this fanfic will follow the format or ask what you can do for
your country. Wondering about whether I
will try to make a big deal out of it floats above the horizon, ready to… do
whatever things floating above the horizon usually do. Maybe fall.
I’d check with Godeerc. So, here
it is, The Last One, but not The Last
One, you know, the last one of this series of seven. Or eight with the non-counting one; nine if
you count the two-part Vegas one. Ten or more if you count imaginary Godeerc the Mystic stories.
GV: Oh, will you just get on
with it!
Scene 1: Monica and
(yes, the house, not the
beloved purple apartment; Joey sitting in an armchair reading a magazine;
Chandler sitting on the couch, reading a newspaper; Ross and Rachel sharing the
armchair opposite of Joey, reading a book together, Emma in a playpen at their
feet; Phoebe is in the dining room behind them, examining a china case)
(the
doorbell rings)
Monica: (off-screen) I got
it! I got it! (runs in from the kitchen toward the
door) I got it! I got it!
(the
others look at
Others: (with little
surprise) Oh.
Monica: (opens the door to
find Godeerc in a business suit) Godeerc?
Godeerc: Monica, it is so
nice to see you! (they hug) I am so sorry it’s been so
long since I visited.
Monica: Come in!
Godeerc: Hey, guys!
All: Hey. Hi. (etc.)
Godeerc: Again, I’m sorry I
haven’t come by, but I got assigned a top priority job.
Ross: What’s with the duds?
Godeerc: Oh, yeah, no
robe. It’s not actually required. I just was in the mood for a change.
Joey: What kind of top-priority
job did you have?
Godeerc: (sighs heavily) There’s
a law firm in
Ross: You didn’t get paid?
Godeerc: No, I did. Just my company, not his.
The two joined recently.
Monica: You did legal work?
Godeerc: Yeah. I was second in my class at
Ross: That’s awesome.
Godeerc: Thanks.
Phoebe: Then why did you
become a mystic?
Godeerc: You get chosen by
certain supernatural Powers-That-Be. You
go to the
Monica: You said so.
Godeerc: My contract expires
when I leave the threshold. Nothing I
can do about it. I’ve given you a lot of
time to think about it. Who’s ready?
(utter
silence)
Godeerc: That hard?
Rachel: Well, a while ago, we
made lists. At least I did, but I’ve
lost it. And I don’t remember what they
are.
Ross: Plus, you know. With Rach
and I getting back together. We
did, by the way.
Godeerc: Yeah, I heard from
your parents. Congratulations and I told
you so.
Ross: You talk to my
parents?
Godeerc: I was hired out for
purely legal work with them. They like
to call and ask me stuff. Nice folks.
Ross and Monica: Thanks.
Monica: What did you do for
them?
Godeerc: (business-like)
Client privacy. You’ll have to ask them
yourselves.
Monica: Okay. The thing is, we’re so happy now, with the
house, which you found quite easily.
Godeerc: No big deal.
Monica: And the twins.
Godeerc: I have not seen them
yet.
Monica: (smiles ear to ear)
I’ll go get them.
Godeerc: (to Ross and Rachel)
Which reminds me. (continuously)
I did notice Emma; I did notice she grew; I did notice she’s still beautiful.
Rachel: Thank you.
Monica: (with a baby in each
arm) Here they are.
Jack and Erica.
Godeerc: They are the most
precious things I’ve ever seen. (pause; turns to
Rachel) Along with Emma.
Rachel: You’re good at
covering yourself.
Godeerc: I’m engaged. It’s a skill you learn. (Ross chuckles;
Phoebe: Thank you. (bows and shows off her rings)
Godeerc: I tried to make it
to the wedding, but all the flights into JFK were cancelled due to snow.
Phoebe: Don’t worry about
it. I didn’t even invite you. I kinda don’t have
your address.
Godeerc: No big deal, which
reminds me. You all have a standing
invitation to my wedding.
Monica: Oh, yeah, who are you
engaged to?
Godeerc: Jessica, remember?
Phoebe: Oh, he’s so
right! We met him at Chris and Halley’s
five-year anniversary. Not to mention I
totally caught on to your chemistry with her that first time you came to do the
glimpses.
Godeerc: (blushes and smiles)
Guilty as charged, I guess.
Rachel: Congratulations. You have one from me and Ross.
Ross: I didn’t know we were
making wedding plans, yet.
Rachel: Well, we’d
better. I gave up a job in
Phoebe: Ooh! Carrie did for Mr. Big!
Monica: (deadpan) How very
observant of you, Pheebs. (to
Rachel) And, yeah! By the way, I can’t
believe Jessica didn’t tell us! It’s not
like we haven’t been frequenting Central Perk lately.
Godeerc: We’ve only been
engaged a month and (critical) she hasn’t worked there in five. She’s going to school to get a degree in
teaching.
Monica: Oh.
Godeerc: Joey, I’d
congratulate you, but not much has happened in your life.
Joey: Oh, well… (looks away)
Godeerc: But, when I was in
Joey: Interesting. (thinks pensively)
Godeerc: Anyway, so no one
has any ideas?
(silence;
the gang looks at each other)
Godeerc: That’s kind of
ironic, because for the last time I do this, I give you the option of making it
permanent.
(silence;
the gang looks at each other)
Monica: Now that we know our
lives would turn out like this, I guess we don’t care how things would be
different.
Godeerc: Wow. That’s the first time someone’s passed the
test before they got the lesson. Well,
in that case, I’ve got only one glimpse for you.
Joey: (exhales) I am totally
ready for this. (holds his arms out like a football
player preparing for a tackle)
Godeerc: Guys, I got a
confession to make. The whole trance
thing is really just kind of a prank. In
reality, I could make this much easier by just showing you the video.
Rachel: You have all this
stuff on video?
Godeerc: Don’t think about
it, just watch.
Scene 2: Monica and
(young
children’s toys strewn across the floor)
(Monica walks in and shields
her eyes from the living room)
Monica: (to herself) It’s clean; it’s clean; it’s clean. (yelling)
Monica:
Scene 3: Monica and
(Monica is dancing on the
couch; waving three fingers)
Scene 4: Monica and
(Monica goes back into the
kitchen)
(a
six-year-old girl with light brown hair walks down stairs in her underwear and
walks outside)
(Jack just points to the
door)
(Jack nods)
(
(Jack walks into the kitchen)
Erica: Nuh-uh.
Erica: He doesn’t like
clothes.
Monica: (from kitchen,
screeches)
Monica: I’ll see you
later. Remember, we’re meeting the gang
at the deli.
Monica: (to the baby) Jenny,
do me a favor and be just like Mommy when you get older. Except for the detrimental
cookie fetish.
(Jenny gurgles)
Monica: Jennifer, your
getting saliva on your pretty dress.
Could you be more careful?
(Jenny just looks at her and
smiles)
Monica: (smiling) But, you
know, no big deal.
Scene 5: Monica and
(watching
the screen)
Monica: So, three kids?! Awesome!
We adopt another?
Godeerc: Shh! It’s getting to the good part.
Scene 6: The Deli
(
(they
exchange salutations)
Scene 5:
(they
watch)
Joey: (disgusted) Hey, where
am I?
Godeerc: It’ll get to it.
Scene 7: The Deli
(the
six sitting at the table)
Rachel: So, Mon, did Joey
send the passes?
Monica: (reaching into her
purse) Yep, we’re all invited to an advance screening of Joey’s new movie.
Pheobe: Yay, Joey!
Ross: Man, he’s doing really
well out there. That’s his second movie
this year and it looks just at good as the last one.
Scene 7: Monica and
(all
but Joey watch the screen; Joey jumping for joy on their couch)
(he
trips over the back and lands on the ground)
Joey: Can I get through one
of these sessions without feeling bad?
Godeerc: It gets better.
Mike’s Voice on TV: So,
Rachel, how’s Emma liking second grade?
Rachel’s Voice on TV: Lovin’ it. She’s
like the most popular girl in class.
Rachel: (claps) Whoo!
Ross’s voice on TV: And she
has straight-A’s. A+
in science.
Ross: (to Emma) Good
girl! Make Daddy proud. (Emma makes a
face)
Rachel: Aaron?
(Godeerc smiles)
Ross’s voice on TV: He likes
dinosaurs.
(Ross and Rachel realize, so
they kiss)
(they
pause and look at each other with wide eyes)
Rachel: (realizes) Ross, we
can do that now.
Ross: Sorry, I keep
forgetting.
Rachel: Well, I guess that’s
just us.
Rachel’s Voice on TV: What
about
(they
all go silence)
Phoebe’s Voice on TV: He’s
great.
Phoebe: It’s mine! It’s mine!
It’s mine! We’re havin’ a kid! (faints)
Joey: So, do I get married and have kids and stuff,
too?
Monica: “…and stuff,” Joe?
Godeerc: I don’t know; the
tape doesn’t go that far.
Rachel: How far does it go?
(the
VCR clicks)
Godeerc: That far.
Ross: So, now what?
Godeerc: I come bearing
gifts. (he pull
out another video cassette from his briefcase)
Rachel: Ooh, when’s this one
from?
Godeerc: Yesterday.
Godeerc: It’s more about the
content than the metaphysics.
Scene 9: Mr. Zelner’s Office
(a
low-quality security tape from above)
(a
knock on the door)
Mr. Zelner:
Come in.
(Godeerc enters, in business
apparel)
Mr. Zelner:
(extending his hand) What a nice surprise, Mr.
VanDrey.
Godeerc: Thank you. The men upstairs said you were looking into a
new hire and had trouble.
Mr. Zelner:
Well, yes, we had to let go of one of our best assistant buyers.
Scene 10: Monica and
(they
watch the TV)
Rachel: Another besides
me? Boy, they’re having trouble.
(she
gets looks)
Rachel: Oh, me!
Scene 11: The Video of Zelner’s Office
(Godeerc seated talking to
Mr. Zelner)
Mr. Zelner:
She had loyalty issues. We even
considered rehiring her on a probationary basis, but she turned us down.
Scene 12: Monica and
(all
watch; Rachel is disgust)
Rachel: You did not! You came back with a higher salary!
Scene 13: The Video
(Godeerc and Mr. Zelner continue talking)
Mr. Zelner:
We haven’t found anyone, yet, but we’ll find someone. Last I heard, Miss
Green was off to
Godeerc: Oh, that’s good for
her. Unless she was the one creating all that clamor at Louis Vuitton.
Mr. Zelner:
You think?
Godeerc: I’d have to check
with my sources.
Mr. Zelner:
What is wrong with that girl?
Godeerc: I can’t really tell
you. Job-searching is common. She might have just been curious.
Mr. Zelner:
Well, it was a shame to lose her.
Scene 14: Monica and
(they
watch; Rachel looks to Godeerc)
Rachel: Why are you
pretending you don’t know me?
Godeerc: Because, then I
wouldn’t get away with this.
Scene 15: The Video
(they
talk on)
Godeerc: (advising) Anyway, watch out for bribery. I just got done working this case where a
boss was bribed by a woman’s husband to promote her. It got really messy when the Board of
Directors found out. Everything blew up
in their faces. If you ever get
approached about anything like that; your best bet is to refuse and keep the
status quo. If you find your judgment
skewed, I’d look into lateral transfers for those involved.
Mr. Zelner:
That’s good advice. (he looks at the dinosaur skull on
his desk) Very good advice. (smiles)
You’re not gonna charge me for that, are you?
Godeerc: (getting up) Never. You know these
negotiations go through higher powers.
Mr. Zelner:
That I do. (extending his hand) Always
a pleasure, Mr. VanDrey.
Godeerc: Likewise.
Scene 16: Monica and
(the
tape ends)
Rachel: So, now what?
(the
doorbell rings)
Godeerc: Monica, if you’ll
excuse me, I’m going to check out your lovely kitchen.
Monica: (gets up and walks to
the door) No problem. It’s so great he
knows the kitchen has to be lovely. (opens the door; it’s Mr. Zelner)
Mr. Zelner…
Mr. Zelner:
(uncomfortably smiling) Mrs. Bing, I presume?
Monica: (twists her mouth,
then smiles) Yes.
Rachel: Sir? How’d you find me?
Mr. Zelner:
I called your apartment. No answer, so I
called information for the super. He
said you moved out. I asked for Monica,
but she’d moved out. He was nice enough
to give me Monica’s new address.
Rachel: Wow. That’s… persistent.
Mr. Zelner:
I was hoping I could find you here. After
I heard about you backing out of the job in
Rachel: Well, I can say I
will seriously think about it. Life
lately has been pretty crazy.
Mr. Zelner:
I understand. Oh, Ron?
(Ross makes signs to the gang
and gets up)
Ross: Sir?
Mr. Zelner:
My son was in awe at the things you loaned
us. (emphasizes this, with a telling look) However, I
think he’s too young to deal with such fragile items, so, here. (picks up a box and hands it to Ross) We might also have to
turn down your offer to tour the museum.
Ross: Well, thank you for my
things back. But the offer for the
museum still stands. Ross can come by
anytime. (smiles)
Mr. Zelner:
Well, thank you.
(he
leaves)
Rachel: Ron? Isn’t that his son’s name?
(Ross laughs)
Godeerc: (with an accent)
Marvelous, Mrs. Bing, absolutely stunning kitchen. I don’t know how you part with it to go to
work.
Monica: Not without tears. Is that lipstick?
Godeerc: (hastily rubs it
off, his face red) You forget that my fiancée is in
the kitchen.
Rachel: (hugging Godeerc
tightly) Thank you, Godeerc.
Ross: (shakes his hand) Me, too. I appreciate
that a lot.
Godeerc: Those are priceless
artifacts. You know how much he could
have gotten for those on eBay?
Especially with Disney picking up paleontology junk, like Susie.
Ross: (a la Red Ross) The largest Tyrannosaurus Rex skeleton ever discovered and
it’s a piece of ornamentation in the World of Mutant Rodents!
Monica: Oh, come on,
Ross. You’re still not afraid of Mickey,
are you?
Ross: And you didn’t cry
either.
Monica: He’s a mouse wearing
not only clothes, but weird clothes!
Godeerc: I got more presents.
(silence)
Godeerc: Gotta
love the twenty-first century. Anyway,
you noticed how I dodged your question about adopting a new baby, Monica.
Monica: You didn’t… you
dodged it? Why? (thinks)
Wha…? You
mean…?
Godeerc: It’s kind of a future
gift, but… (gives her a clipping of newspaper)
Monica: (reads)
“Pharmaceutical researchers may have discovered a drug that will heal damage to
the ovarian system that once would have resulted in various levels of infertility. The drug also causes an increase in female
fertility…” (crying) That means we might be able to… When
is this from?
Godeerc: 2006. The drug was on the market eighteen months
later. It was very expensive, but you’d
been saving up for it.
Monica: And… Jenny?
Godeerc: Yep. I have to warn you. You won’t remember this; parts of your
experiences with me will be forgotten.
This included. We can’t
completely remove it, though. You’ll
dream about the drug a lot in the next few years.
Monica: Oh, I can live with
that.
Godeerc: I feel required to
inform you of something else. The drug
doesn’t last. While it does miraculous
things at first, further tests of the drug show that it has detrimental effects on the reproductive
system afterwards. By this time, you’re
forty, and you won’t be having any more kids anyway, but the drug ends up
causing early menopauses in almost 100% of test cases within five years. You yourself will have full-blown menopause
at 42. You get off lucky. Some women develop ovarian cancer.
Monica: Whoa.
Godeerc: It’s just the way
things are. I’m getting out on a
loophole by letting these things get caught in your subconscious. I apologize if you have nightmares about
this. I assure you, all three of your
children. All of your children (he makes
eye contact with the others) will be healthy.
Godeerc: Yeah. I’ll also put in a good word for you with my
contacts in the advertising division of my company. Hopefully the word will spread.
Godeerc: It’s all you could
ask for.
Phoebe: Do I take the drug?
Godeerc: Phoebe, your
fertility quotient is already off the chart.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah.
Godeerc: Oh, and just to let
you know. In a couple years, you’re gonna burst into a convenience store and purchase a box of cheap
condoms because Mikey-boy forgot about the
incidentals of your anniversary night.
The after-results are meant to be, okay?
Phoebe: (giggles) That’s the kind of divination I like to hear.
Godeerc: But, that’s not the
gift. I have to entertain a large group
of very wealthy, Japanese businessmen in a month. (with
meaning behinds his words) Where you think I should take them out for drinks
after dinner?
Phoebe: Well, gee, there’re a
lot of great places…
Godeerc: Well, I’ve heard
they love karaoke.
Phoebe: Hmm, I only know of a
couple of karaoke bar in the area…
Godeerc: Did I mention
they’re in the restaurant industry, looking for places to invest in here in the
States?
Phoebe: Oh! Mike’s place!
Godeerc: Bingo.
(Monica clears her throat)
Godeerc: Oh, don’t worry; Javu’s already on their itinerary. One of them is (Japanese accent) Takenouchi Hisagi, who has
already invested in your restaurant.
Monica: Fun.
Godeerc: So, did I miss
anyone?
(Joey points to himself)
Godeerc: (pulls something out
of his back pocket) It’s a coupon for half-price fair
to
Joey: What?
Godeerc: Joey, you know that
your career is drying up in
Monica: Oh, my God. Joey.
Joey: The guys at DOOL want to exuent Dr. Drake Remoray. And trust
me, when I figured out how to spell that and looked it up in the dictionary, I
was not happy.
Monica: Nor is it
grammatically correct. “Exuent” is the
Latin word for, “they exit.”
(silence)
Monica: I took Latin in
college to fulfill a language requirement.
Godeerc: Wouldn’t French have
been better because it relates so well to the culinary arts?
Monica: You think I would
have realized that. Or
Italian. That would have worked,
too. I could have taken Italian.
Joey: I gave you option back in ’93.
(Monica rolls her eyes)
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
Rachel: So, now what happens?
Godeerc: Life goes on.
Phoebe: (singing
passionately) “Long after the thrill/of livin’ is
gone…” Sorry, I love that song.
Ross: That’s it? Just, see ya later,
toodaloo, sayonara, adios, adieu, ciao…
(awkward
silence)
Ross: I haven’t had a student
come to see me during office hours since
Joey: You mean you don’t…
Ross: We have a firewall!
Joey: It’s not that good; you
just gotta be creative.
Ross: That was you? You know how many butts I had to kiss to get
them to give me tenure? I had to endure
a condescending speech!
Rachel: So did I!
Ross: May I remind you what I
sacrificed to keep you here? (to Godeerc) By the way,
thanks for fixing both problems.
Godeerc: My pleasure.
Phoebe: Ooh, I just had the
craziest idea! We could screw up our
lives.
Phoebe: No, not in real life,
but in glimpses.
Godeerc: I would love to, but
I’m off the clock. Plus, it’s not in the
syllabus for the last glimpse meeting.
Sorry, but maybe we can do it some other time.
(time
lapse)
(ENDING CREDITS)
(Godeerc leaves)
(CREDIT: Debbie Matenopolous as Jessica Williams)
Rachel: Anyone else get that
funny tingling in your brain after he left?
(all
reply in affirmative)
Monica: Look, he left his
briefcase. (grabs it and runs to the door)
(when
she opens the door, Godeerc is waiting)
Monica: You left your briefcase.
Godeerc: Yes, as well my
fiancée. By the way, I’m not on the
clock anymore. Who wants to screw up
their lives?
(cheering)
(END)
A/N: Well, that one did not
turn out like I expected.
And this is no place to leave
it off. Expect a sequel very soon. I know you want to see the gang screw up
their lives.
___
(^_^) – Haha. The last one. (cries) It’s just so
beautiful!
Created Friday, September 4, 2004. Updated Thursday, August 18, 2005.