Introduction to Personal Journaling - Week Two
Freewriting prompts
Did you have any nicknames? What were they and how did you get them?
The only real nickname that I can remember was Sugar Cookie. My grandfather gave me that name. I lived in their house for the first three years of my life. I bounced back and forth between wanting my grandfather to be my father and wanting to marry him. I can remember riding into town with him to get ice cream. He would always sing to me, my two favorites were These Boots Were Made for Walkin and Downtown. I know that I was his favorite, and I also know that he felt a little guilty about that. But as far as I was concerned, the sun rose and set on him.
Describe your elementary school. What was your favorite class? Who were your teachers? Did you walk to school or ride the bus?
I remember my first elementary school. We lived in Chicago, and I walked to school. I remember there was a penny candy store right across the street from the school. I would stop there and spend all my lunch money on candy. That is until the school called my mother wanting to know why I did not have any lunch money.....BUSTED! Then the following year I just hated the class I was in. The boys were mean. They kept sticking me in the butt with the straight pins from the bulletin board. My mom went to talk to the school and they put me in a different class.
Who was your first best friend? Who was your first boyfriend or girfriend? Do you still keep in touch with this person? Why or why not?
My very first best friend was our next door neighbor once we moved into the suburbs. Her name was Sandra. We did just about everything together. We met in third grade, and went all the way through high school as best friends. I miss her. My first boyfriend's name was Michael. He followed me home from school every day in 10th grade until I relented and said I would go out with him. We dated all through high school, up until the Senior year. I guess I got bored, and broke up with him. We are still in contact. Every once in a while he will visit while he is out here on vacation from California. We talk all the time online.
Picture yourself as a child standing in front of you. What do you see?
If I saw myself as a child standing in front of you, I would see a sad little girl. I was always so sad. I never really understood why, until I became an adult. I had a mother, and I loved her so very much. But she was emotionally unavailable. I know now that she was battling her own mental diseases. But by the same token, I must have sensed it because I seemed to have appointed myself her champion. I started to take care of her.
What would you say to yourself as a child?
I would tell her that she is a special little girl, and she is very loved. She is important and a worth while person. And that she will grow up to be a very special person, with children of her own who will love her just as much as she loves her mother.
What keepsakes have you saved from your childhood and why? What do you wish you could have saved?
Sadly, I have no keepsakes from my childhood. I could not even begin to tell you why, I really do not know. I can not even remember any things that I would have liked to have saved.
How do you remember your parents behaving toward each other, and towards you?
You have to understand, I came from a totally dysfunctional family. An abusive step-father, an absent father, and a mentally weak mother. I never even met my father until I was 14 years old. I am also an adult survivor. My step-father was always beating on my mother. And I think he contributed to her mental illness.
Do you have any siblings? Did you have sibling disputes? What was the worst argument you had with a brother or sister and how was it resolved? What is the happiest memory involving a sibling that you can recall?
All of my siblings are half siblings. I did not get along with any of them. Once it was known that their father was not my father, I was treated like an outsider. So, no, I do not have good relationships with them.
Did you have a favorite pet? What was its name? What can you remember about it?
I did not have a favorite pet until the year 1997. She came from the pound. A beagle/springer mix. Her name was Patches. She was truly a family pet. If one person of the household was not at home, she could not rest until they were safely home. Sadly, she died in March of this year.
Where did you grow up? Did you have your own room? What were your favorite sports? Your favorite hobbies? Your favorite music group? Your favorite TV program?
grew up for the most part in a little hamlet called Romeoville. We were a family of 2 adults, 2 daughters, and 7 sons, living in a 3 bedroom house. Of course the parents had one, the girls had the small bedroom with the baby always in there. At one point, the boys room had bunk beds built into the wall in a crisscross fashion, just so everyone could have a bed. I did not like sports, but I was in the marching band, so I had to go to all the football and basketball games. My favorite hobbies were music and swimming. My favorite music group was the Partridge Family. It seems to me that my favorite TV show was Here Come the Brides.
