Hostage
Rating:
U
Genre:
comedy
Setting:
A Quiz, the street, my room
Main
Characters: Me, and my Muses
Part
1
“Question
number 26: How many elephants hold up the Discworld?” Eiko jumped up and down
in her seat excitedly!
“I know this
one! I know it!!!” she scribbled the answer down on a scrap of paper, proudly.
It was the first question she knew the answer to that her muses didn’t. They
were at a quiz. Eiko had spent most of the night tapping her pen against the
table, while her muses did the work of answering questions. Kharg wrote down
her answer for question 26. Skye giggled in a hysterical way. He was drunk out
of his mind, having spent the night drinking
“What was
Walt Disney afraid of?” Eiko sat up straight.
“I know this
one too!” she whispered, “The answer is mice!” This statement made Skye sit up
as well.
“What?! That’s stupid! His main character is a mouse! Why
would he make his main character a mouse if he was afraid of mice?” The quiz
continued. When the quizmaster eventually got around to reading the answers
out, it turned out that Eiko had been correct about question 37. She kicked
Kharg.
“See! I told
you so! You never listen to me when I’m right!”
“Sorry!
Skye’s reasoning seemed good though!”
“He’s drunk!
How can you say a rambling drunkard has good reasoning! I knew that answer!”
The argument continued between Kharg and Eiko. None of them noticed Skye,
sitting at the end of the table, looking terrified out of his life.
The quiz
night ended, and Eiko and her muses headed home. Benji weaved his way along in
between Kharg and Darc, bumping into first one, then the other. Eiko wander
along next to Darc, Skye curled up in his usual place on her shoulder. He
suddenly tugged at Eiko’s hair, his usual way of getting attention when she was
talking, or on the phone, or generally doing things where she didn’t want to be
interrupted. Now he spoke in a conspirator whisper.
“Eiko, if
Walt Disney was afraid of mice, and his main character was a mouse, do you know
what that means?”
“That he was
drunk when he made it up?” Eiko hazarded. Benji cut in.
“He was a
sadistic loony with a messed up sense of humor?” Skye shot Benji a glare.
“NO! What it
means is: Mickey Mouse was holding Walt Disney hostage!” Eiko smiled
sympathetically
“Ok honey,
whatever you say!” Skye seemed indignant of this obvious patronization on
Eiko’s part. He tugged at her hair harder.
“It’s true!
It must be! Why would someone who is terrified of mice make one a star?
Obviously Walt Disney was tracked down by Mickey Mouse, and Mickey tortured the
poor man until he signed a contract saying that he would make Mickey a star!
Walt Disney was under Mickey Mouse’s rule for years and nobody did anything
about it!” Benji grinned evilly
“Perhaps
Goofy and Donald, Mickey’s evil lackeys, were threatening everyone who knew
about this brutalization on the mouse’s part to Disney with sporks, terrifying them all
into submission and in turn getting their names up in light as well!” A look of
horror passed over Skye’s face.
“Oh no! It’s a conspiracy against all the good workers at
Disney!” Eiko rolled her eyes, and tapped Benji sharply on his nose.
“You know, you’re
not helping with the situation Benji.” Benji smirked.
“Well, he
deserves what he get, coming up with rubbish about a cartoon mouse holding a
human hostage! Mickey Mouse doesn’t even have any special powers, except an
infuriating squeaky voice!”
“He’s a mouse!
Of course his voice is squeaky!”
“My point is, it’s a load of rubbish! Skye, stop
coming up with stupid fantasies all the time!” Having shouted the last
remark at Skye, Benji stalked off ahead of the group. Eiko remained lost in
thought
“What if it
is true that Mickey Mouse held Walt Disney hostage? If one mouse can achieve
that much by holding one person hostage, what would happen if the entire mouse
population learned from his example? I men, we would be overrun by the mice and
force to live in their barbaric ways, eating cheese day and night, and gnawing
holes in cardboard, and scaring elephants!” Darc and Kharg looked at Eiko.
“You know,”
Darc commented “that’s almost exactly what happened when we went to the circus
the other week…you brought a load of cheese along, and then when you finished
the cheese you got nervous when the acrobats were jumping around and chewed the
cardboard the cheese came in to bits, then at the end you started trying to
scare the elephant” Eiko looked a bit disturbed by this news.
“Well, at
least I don’t squeak!” At that moment, Benji, who had hidden in some bushes up
ahead, unknown by the others, jumped out screaming “Boo” Eiko squeaked in fear
and hid behind Darc. Kharg nodded sympathetically.
“Of course
you don’t squeak Eiko” he patted her head. Eiko whimpered. Then shouted
“I’ve turned
into a mouse!” With that statement she burst into tears and ran into the house,
which they had just reached. The muses looked at each other uncomfortably. Darc
rubbed his head uneasily
“One of us
better go make sure she’s ok.” he said, and followed her into the house.
Eiko was curled up in her room, still crying.
Skye, who of course had never left her shoulder, was pawing at her, trying to
cheer her up. Darc approached and sat next to Eiko hugging her.
“It doesn’t
matter whether you’re a mouse, a wolf, or a human, you know. We all love you
just the same! After all, we are you’re muses. Anyway, if it makes you feel
better, you probably aren’t a mouse, because you like cats, and mice don’t.”
Eiko sniffed, and looked up.
“That’s
true” She admitted “I love kitty cats” she wiped her eyes and blew her nose on
Darc’s coat, soaking it. “Let’s go get some hot chocolate” she stood up,
feeling much better, and picked up Skye, cuddling him. The three walked out of
the room to get hot chocolate.
“You know”
commented Eiko “I think quizzes are a bad idea. They do weird twisted things to
peoples minds. We shouldn’t go to any more quizzes!” Skye nodded vigorously,
agreeing with her statement.
“Right! No more quizzes! And we should go and set Walt Disney
free!” Eiko and Darc exchanged glances.
“Maybe some
other time” Eiko said, closing her door behind them.
THE END