| The Story Behind Crappy Love Ballad |
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| This is my last attempt at trying to explain "Crappy Love Ballad". Crappy Love Ballad is not by Angels and Airwaves. It was created by Agito Plus Nine. It was written by me, Douglas Bogart. But recently many people have begun confusing my song with something Tom Delonge wrote. So I'm hoping I can clear all this up. Because I am sick and tired of being called a Tom Delonge "wannabe" I wrote the song to for a girl, not so everyone could say "Wow this guy is trying to rip off Tom Delonge". So if you've chosen to read this boring back story of why you've somehow downloaded "Crappy Love Ballad" and why is it named after Tom Delonges new band, or you've come looking for lyrics, because you actually enjoy the song. Then your in luck! By the way, you can skip the "Backstory" section. |
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| INTRODUCTION: |
| WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO WRITE THIS SONG?: |
| I was suffering from an extremly awful break up. A break up that had happened a whole year before I wrote the song. I had previously written another song called "This Song Is For You" for the girl who had stolen my heart. But that song didn't reach her in time, and we stopped talking. I for some reason continued to suffer for a whole extra year after we broke up. I dated other girls, and they all ended with me breaking them up for old feelings for an ex. I tried everything, but I couldn't let her go. Then one day listening to "The Police" I suddenly felt like writing a new song. So I started playing on my guitar, and came up with the riff that would become "Crappy Love Ballad" now this was in 2004, just a month away from Christmas. I would continue to toy with the riff using chords I had learned from playing "Message in a Bottle". So I'd continue playing with the song, while trying to write other songs for Agito Plus Nine. Which at this point wasn't doing much, or going anywhere. But later I'd get some inspiration to write lyrics after talking to the girl I had fallen deeply in love with. So I spend the next few months toying with the lyrics, and I finish them around March of 2005. It took me that long because I didn't know how to sing and play to some of the riffs I had written, so I had to settle on changing the song a bit. But the song was finished, and ready to be played! |
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| A BACKSTORY ABOUT THE GIRL: |
| I met her during my 10th grade year of highschool in 2003, she was in 9th grade, and in my gym class. I liked her, but I was currently seeing someone. My best friend, and even once a drummer for Agito Plus Nine, switched into my class. He also liked her, but he was also taken. Well he would eventually dump his girlfriend for no good reason, and start flirting with the girl we both liked. I eventually dumped my girlfriend, so I could have a chance. But I was to late, he already had her. So all three of us became close, I of course was the third wheel, so it was always akward to see a girl I was crazy about kiss my best friend. But I endured the pain, and even became good friends with her, and on days he was out sick I'd get even closer to her. I'd eventually find out she was very much like me, she liked most of my music, she was smart, and she was still a virgin, she hadn't even gone past "first base". I felt a strong connection to her, and I became extremly envious of my friend, he wasn't a virgin, he had done everything in the book, and even did drugs. Which he even got her into. Eventually he'd reveal his plans to me when I asked "Are you ever going to actually ask her out?" and his reply was "Nah I just want to fuck her." I was hurt by this, and felt extremly bad for her, because she was looking forward to a "real" relationship. So I eventually told her, and she called me a liar. He found out I wasn't on his side and bad mouthing him by finding an online journal I had. Then we'd get into several fights in the locker room, and class suddenly became a very, very scary place to be. Eventually things would go my way, and she would admit to liking me. She had liked me from day one, but the fact that I was taken put a "STAY AWAY" tag on me, so she went for my single friend. We eventually go on a date to the movies, kiss and everything is perfect, we were offically dating in November. But after two weeks, the side effects of my friend would get to her. She was already becoming a druggie, and a "bad kid" because of their brief time together. I didn't like it, and she wasn't willing to change, so things started to get tense between us, even though I tried to keep things going by stopping by her house (since she lived by me) but it was no use. Eventually we would spilt. I'd admit to being in love with her, and she'd call me a liar, and we stopped talking. I was hurt, but making it out ok. But in December I was dating again, and happy. I was doing everything I could to forget her, but she would start talking to me again. She found out I was dating, and was furious that I was already moving on, and she told me she loved me. Confused as hell by that, I dumped a girl I could probaly still be dating to this day. So I end the relationship in hopes that something will start again between us, now that we were offically in love. But nothing happened. So two months go by, and I can't stand the sight of her. I'm emtionally devestated, and hurt beyond belief. Then she tells me shes moving. I tell I don't care, only to hang up, and realize she's really gone. I break down again. So skip ahead to May, I'm getting over her by getting into drugs and alcohol. My bands broken up due to a fight between me and my bass player. I'm now a diffrent person, and she IMs me, and I tell her to never talk to her again, because shes done nothing but cause me pain. She does exactly that, and stops talking to me. So summer goes by, I'm causing trouble, dating random girls, and acting like a jackass in a new band. But the new school year rolls in, and Agito Plus Nine makes a come back. Me and Josh become friends again, and promise to make the band bigger this year. So the fair rolls around in the Fall, and I by chance see her there. She is stunning, and suddenly all my feelings for her come back.. So we start talking again, and we both admit to being crazy about each other still. So we try to keep in touch, but I still wander away from her, and date other girls off and on. But finally in the summer of 2005, I start trying harder, and devote all my time to talking to her, and I do everything I can to keep in touch. I stop caring about other girls, and only care about her. I actually try. But after a couple months, and the day after Agito Plus Nines worst show. She dumps me again, after being "missing" for a week. She went somewhere for a week and didn't tell me, and didn't seem to want to talk as much on the phone. Then she finally did it on a monday in July, I called in sick to work, and called her right after. She basically said to me "I don't love you anymore" and I shrugged it off at first, and said "I'll call you tomorrow I have to shower." So for about 30 minutes, I go on doing everything I normally do, then as I'm eating breakfest, it hits me that shes left me again, and I break down and cry. I don't go into work for a whole week, because I can't even move away from my bed. I become the most emo kid in the world, and I do nothing but cry, mope, and think of how things could be. My life goes to hell. But in October I have a plan to get her back. |
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| THE PLAN TO GET THE GIRL: |
| In September things with Agito Plus Nine are speeding up. We were given three shows to play in October. So we did what we always did, jamed and recorded. But at the end of September we record our best, and most well known song, Crappy Love Ballad. It took us 5 hours to finishing recording, we had 16 seprate tracks. About 5 of those were guitar. Steve even included some string bass. It was a masterpiece. A song I could of only dreamed of hearing on cd. I had never been more proud of Agito Plus Nine, and I had renewed faith in my writing and a chance at getting the girl back in my arms. I decided I should mail this song to her since it was written for her, and I'd write a letter to her. So I had Josh called her and get her address saying he thought he should send her the song. So with the address I started writing my letter, and packed the song up and shipped it. |
| THE LETTER: |
| Dear ***, Obviously Josh didn't send this; I had him call you so I could personally send this to you. I didn't know your address and it sounded like a good plan, I'm thankful. ***, I understand why you feel the way you do, the whole "we won't get to see each other much and I sometimes forget why I love you" The very same thing happened to me. But despite what you say, no matter how much you cahnge, I'll always love you. You could be 300 pounds right now, and I'm fine with that, your still ***. I'll just eat crap loads of food, and we can be a happy 600 pound couple. I don't know if the same goes with you, I have changed drastically. I no longer carry the image or attitude I once had. I'm just a preppy anti social kid now. But I have never in my life been so sure of how much I love you. You said you feel bad for me, because I can't date anyone, and you feel like it's your fault. It's my choice ***, I only want you, and I make damn well sure the other girls know that. I finally finished the song entitled "Crappy Love Ballad" you should recognize the lyrics I've included. I don't expect you to suddenly come running back to me, for all I know you're taken and that is ok with me. I just wanted you to know, that I love you ***, now, and forever. I'll always be here, waiting for you. Maybe someday we'll fun into each other again, like at the fair, and we'll smile at each other. We'll remeber how we once loved each other threw incredible odds, and distance. Not a day goes by ***, where I don't think about you, not a day goes by where I say "I love her, and someday we'll be back together, or I'll die a hobo at Kroger." Well the first ones true, I don't think the Kroger part is. I hope you enjoy the song, please note that I'm not a perfect singer, and I did my best for it being 11:00 p.m. I did my singing all in one take. I'm going to go back and tweak it for our CD in December (Which I'll mail you as well) unless of yourse you find the singing to be perfectly fine. Josh's girlfriend didn't, but who cares, everyone else liked it. It took us 5 hours to record this song, and there is a crap load of guitars, and string bass. I think after I did the 4th guitar track my hand felt like it was about to fall off, and my knuckles bust threw the skin. But it was worth it. I think I got my point across. It took me a year to write the song, and two years to have something to write about. I personally think this song is a lot better than "This Song Is For You" I've gotten a lot better at writing, and I know how to put my words to guitar now. I just want you to know, I'm going to finally leave this house (I home school now, how ironic eh?) and sing about how much a boy loved a girl. I love you ***, and I hope someday thinkgs will work out, and we'll pick up where we left off. Love Yours and Forever Douglas Bogart (I put here name as *** for privacy. But some of you may be smart and probably already figured it out.) |
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| AFTERMATH: |
| It turned out she didn't have my number. So I had to call her the day after she got it because she was out. So I called her the next day, and things still seem diffrent. She tells me she likes the song, and we kinda akwardly talk. Then she tells me she has to go, but she'll call back. The call never came. So I felt defeated, and depressed again. But I had given it one last shot, and who knows maybe if I had called her back something could of worked out. But Shes a smart person, and probably had her reasons, like a boyfriend. So I would of just been a diffcult issue for them. But eventually when I regained my senses like a few weeks later, I call her back. But sadly, her number was disconnected. I wouldn't hear from her till April. Her family couldn't pay the phone company, and she had thought I had her cell phone number. But oh well. In our April talk, things were very diffrent, I was at my lowest point losing the band, and she was at her greatest. It was embrassing. But she was happy in a new relationship, so I respected it, and after she gave me a wake up call I attempted to relive life. So here I am it's June 16th, and I finally finished this website after forgeting about it since January. I'm about 90% over her, only every now and then do I think about her. So yeah. Those who made it this far down. Congrats! Hope you enjoyed the song, and this depressing story! |
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