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~On a Sunday, I broke a financial record not only my personal fundraising record. I also broke the teams record and earned the highest amount for the whole districts area for that day. I was the top 3 in the nation on that interesting day. It was over $300 for that shortened day. Sundays were most always shortened fundraising days, we would start at 11 AM instead of 6 AM, and finish by 9 PM instead of 10 PM. This $300 record brought a lot of new attention to me. Attention that was brought to the Head Hauncho of the MFT, Mr. Kamiyama. When there was a gathering of all teams, for a weekend of lectures and games, I was singled out and put onto a top fundraising team.

~My new team Captain was Mr. Tsijumura. We were sent to So. Florida, Tampa to the Keys. As a group, we broke all kinds of records, we had several of the best fundraisers in the whole UC on our team. I was just a want-a-be. Someone had to be low man and by-golly I made sure I was always that man. Held the record for being low man the most on that team, damn proud of it too!

~Several times I was awarded with prizes only reserved for the top MFT�ers in the world. Autographed pictures of Rev. Sun Myung Moon, and his family. OHH, AHH, so cool, so special, so cheap. I also have acquired autographs from Bo Hi Pak, Kamiyama, Sudo, and the Great Hyo Jin Moon. This was done by groveling and ass kissing at special events dedicated to inspire the troops to earn MORE MONEY! Mr. Tsijumura was an interesting character, he was real nice one minute,then yelling at us or me at the top of his lungs the next minute. Psychologists today, call it stark raving lunacy. I just thought it was natural for CF�s and maybe even a prerequisite for the position of power. It didn�t matter if it was a private or public place when the yelling began, didn�t matter who saw or what we felt, this was war and he was a Sargent Snorkle want-a-be, while I was Beetle Bailey. He would practice karate with me on occassion. It started out in the shopping center parking lots, then advanced to more private places. His reasoning was to teach me self-defence, whether I had asked for it or not. I still have no idea what made him think of this, I had never asked.

~It was fun at first, then the 6�3�, 250 pounds of Japanese muscle started to get rougher and rougher. The fun was gone quick. He would corner me, sometimes in a bathroom stalls and pulverize me. He would brutalize my shins by kicking the same spots over and over again. At the same time he would be slugging me all over. He would get all angry and controlling but God forbid if I ever got angry. Remember he was my Central Figure, my Abel, my way to God through chain of command, or so I believed. He was an abusive bimbess ass. My last beating was the worst, he beat the hell out of me in a bathroom stall,while he let other members watch on. It was very painful physically,emotionally, and spiritually. I was left on the floor, next to a toilet, to recouporate. After he had been on top of me cornered, slugging, hitting, kicking and beating the life out of me. In his childhood, he must have been the class bully. Maybe SMM has a special training course in abuse for MFT Captains? More abusive means more promotions. Shortly after that, Tsijumura replaced Simba as a Commander of that area�s MFT, he then began to pick my captains. I had one real good captain, Jeff Schaefer, but that was cut short. He must have noticed Jeff and I getting along and that HAD to change! Then I had the Captain from Hell, Philip Loveless. We use to be the best of friends, while fundraising, then he got promoted and I was put on his team. Life in absolute hell. If you ever wonder if a person is your real friend, let that person become your boss or fundraising Captain, you will see why some people say, �Absolute Power Corrupts Absoulutely!�

~Around the same time as this, pain was screaming throughout my legs. Pains from the karate kicks, sleeping in vans, and carrying boxes by my side. Chiropractic and Neurological problems would become lifelong bedfellows. Pain that has ruled me, throughout my life. I have spent a small fortune to my Chiropractor and Neurologists, even caved into the wishes of the local witch doctor. Should have sought damages in the form of a lawsuit but the Statue of Limitations have expired by the time I realized that sueing SMM would not be sueing Christ. That is another story, which maybe will be talked about when I write my second story, �Prodigal Son Returns.� Tsijumura�s answer to this pain was so profound, I wondered why I hadn�t thought of it. It was not to get medical attention. It was, �get the kid a wheelchair�, this way I could continue to do God's work. Gotta do Gods work untill I drop, if I want to go down in history as a hero. The wheelchair was a real money maker, it would rely on pity and the good will of people who saw a cripple asking for money for God�s work! It didn�t matter of the cost, for me and you. Regardless of what I felt or thought, in pain or conscience, it was all in the name of God�s Will Be Done. I was forced to act totally crippled and could not get up and walk around or I would surely pay the price by public scrutiny. Roll around for money, bathroom breaks, and lunch. Going across the parking lot, in-between cars, and avoiding getting hit at all costs by surprised drivers. I got pretty good on the thing, it�s a pity it didn�t recline and have a TV with a drink holder. Maybe then, I would have lasted longer than I did. After doing this for a good period of time, I gave up, I demanded medical attention. I was sick and tired and it was real hard to wheel from one shopping center to the next shopping center. I told this to Loveless, who loved to just yell at me. How dare I demand anything, dont I want to go to Heaven? Yada, Yada, Yada. Heck no, I did all this because I wanted to go to Hell, didn�t he know! I then told him I was just going to leave the UC, bring me home to the Center and I would just leave. I needed to pack my signed pictures mind you, they may protect me from evil doings and they may have power like the Shroud of Jesus? His logic for this problem was simple. He yelled at me, then he slugged me and pulled me off the chair and pushed me into the van. All this with the team mother just sitting by watching with those lovely Japanese judgemental eyes. He then got into the van and yelled more, as loud as he could. I argued with him so he punched me twice, punches in the chest and stomach and then he slapped me hard across theface. He laughed at me, while I sat and cried. I weeped like a little baby, I was crushed inside and I dare not hit him back. If I knew then what I know now, while he was doing this, I would have reverted back to my criminal ways. The ways which helped me survive incarceration and all my many drug dealings. What was a little more jail time on my rap sheet. But then that is neither here nor there, I didn�t know any better, back then.

~He then took me to the Center, where I became the scum of the Earth. My great friends disappeared into the woodwork. Tsijumura let me have it verbally, emotionally, and socially. He would ostrasize me from all doings and everyone else. I would become the leper of the MFT, I�m surprised they didn�t send me to a leper colony or at least a bad MFT�er colony. Why did I take it? The same reason why I put up with the bull in the first place. I believed that Rev. Sun Myung Moon was the new Messiah. I believed he would change the world and I would see it happening in the next few years. I wanted so much to be the hero of my family, by going down in history like Paul the Apostle. I wanted so much for this to work. To do otherwise, I would have to admit I had made a mistake in the first place. I neither had the resources, nor the knowledge, to know I had been taken in the first place. Like I said earlier, �Lack of education was my delima!� I was sent to the headquarters, the New York Center. The New Yorker Hotel was not purchased yet.

~The Director of the Manhattan Center was Dr. Bergman. A real nice man, no complaints about this guy. He had a real radical Ch. 2 lecture. One that has probably caused many sexual hangups in many members. He was the one that began my medical jouney that set me on the path of healing. There, I became the Director of Transportation and I was a driver for the next couple of CF's of the 4 West 43rd. Street Center, Mr. Sawada and Rev. Sudo. Prior to me leaving for a medical sabbatical, which meant I would go home and my parents would fork out the dollars for medical treatment, Mr. Sawada left his mark with me. Mr. Sawada�s mark: began while we were in a French Restaurant in Manhattan.While ordering our food I was questioning the waiter about the alcohol content in the food. I wanted food with NO alcohol. I still had not had a drink or drug, since I was 17 years old. I wanted to keep that solemn promise I had made to God. A promise I made prior to joining the UC. In the middle of my questioning, Sawada butted in,and started to lecture me. He reminded me I had not had anything to drink for almost 5 years. I was now working for the Second Christ and destined for a life in Heaven. Why was I scared of alcohol anymore? He then told me, �You are cured by now, go ahead and order anything, I insist. The DP and SMM will protect you, and guide you all the way.� Tell that one to Hyo Jin. Since I had no real Alcoholics Anonymous knowledge and it all sounded so right and so true, I said OK. I went ahead and ate, drank with them and thought all was merry. Then I went home for about 7 months of medical healing. Top with my first drink destined to learn the truth in the A.A. saying, �One is too many, and a thousand is never enough!� Should I share about my experience with a counseling appointment I had with Lady Dr. Kim? Where her advice for me with raging hormones was to pray and stroke the lizard at the same time. That was one real sound advice I just couldn�t follow. It just seemed too bizarre, now if a sister could help me, that would be different. };^)> Maybe in my next story, �Coming Back, and Being Rejected for the Matching and Blessing, and Surviving Cruel Remarks,� or something along this line, I can dwell into this advice by Lady Dr. Kim. Thank you, oh great wanderer. And remeber the Truth will set you free, like it has for me. If only I could get over the anger and regret part.To anyone who has read my story, thank you for your time. It does me a world of good to just share the truth. I spend some time on the newsgroup alt.religion.unification I use to spend time on Global Village Inn, but as I write this story of mine, I am being kicked off because the Members of the Unification Chuch just cant handle the truth. No more lies from me about the Unification Church. I give permission for Craig, Steve Hassan, No. 6, Tilman with his Driving Principle to use any part of my story or my whole story if the need ever happens.

God Bless you Nansook Hong, your book has helped me tremendously.

X-MEMBERS TESTIMONIALS - SECTION Danny Harth Gordon Neufeld Sveta Bill Taylor Brenda Henry John Guzman Bora Uzima Harlan Simantel Isshi Natalija Velikorodina Todd Harvey

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