Dr. Troy: Rob, we were so sad to hear about what happened to your son. We are going to do everything within our power to bring him back to his old self.
Dr. McNamara: Don't let him bullshit you, we came as fast as we could because we know how deep your pockets are. We usually do tits and asses. Not that we can't do the best job your son can have done on his face, mind you, but we ARE really in it just for the greenbacks kimosabee.
Dr. Troy: You'll have to forgive my partner he's a bit rough aruond the edges.
NRO: And a prick to boot. I like him already. So how long of a recovery road are we talking about and what is your time table for moving forward?
Dr. Troy: well, we have to assess his labs and look over the reports from the endocrinologists and the radiologists and a couple other ologists. When we determine his muscle capacity is returning to normal we can go in and start preliminary repair work.
Dr. McNamara: What my oh so timid partner is trying to say Mr. osbourne, is that it's going to be a good six months before your son even HAS a face. Maybe another six months, if he follows our orders, and he can look himself agian.
NRO: Direct. To the point. And expensive. Really REALLY expensive. I like this guy. So a year maybe year and a half knowing the Osbourne temper. I can handle that. I don't know if HE can handle that. Do it. Whatever it takes.
Dr. McNamara: Now I'm starting to like you. Do we have an open expense account while we are here in your beautiful inbred state?
NRO: Actually...I was thinking if you guys still have contacts in Miami, we could have him flown their, and you guys stay in my place on my dime. I live in Windermere outside orlando so it's only a three and a half hour car trip and a forty five minute hop in my private jet.
Dr. McNamara: Private jet? Yeah. I like you too Mr. Nitemare. I like you too!
Dr. Troy: Oh my God. This is disturbing on so many levels. About your son's condition. i know they said you haven't left his side since you got back from your big match or something, butyou need to go home. you need to rest. When your brother Pledge called us, he told us about what had happened. Your son, from what I know about him, wouldn't want you hovering the halls of the hospital being an errant prick to the staff, constantly criticizing them, and granted, some times it is warranted, but other times it is just because you are exhausted. AND you have a match with a seven foot five monster you barely beat last time? Dude. Go home.
NRO: No. Well, maybe. I mean I'm not going to go home. I have to be in Rochester for the match. I'm thinking of a Manhatten field trip for me. A little R&R maybe some shopping and spending way too much money on shit I don't need. Life of a champion.
Dr. McNamara: Oh man, I know a great place. It's on 61st street with a beautiful view of the decent half of Central park, which, despite the muggings homosexual prostitution and homeless crack addicts strung throughout the view like ornaments on a distorted distant christmas tree, its a nice place. Very Victorian. Very expensive.
NRO: Go on....
Dr. Troy: No....don't you do it you sick bastard.
Dr. McNamara: Oh piss off Christian. He's the heavyweight champion of the World for crying out loud. You think he believes in ghost stories?
NRO: Whoa whoa whoa! Ghost stories?!? Hell to the yes.
Dr. Troy: Well, another sick fetish you two have in common Sean, way to go!
NRO: Bobby was just on Ghost Adventures a week and a half ago. Man. I can't believe this all happened. Maniac is going to pay and pay dearly.
Dr. McNamara: Maniac? IS that the seven footer Christian mentioned?
NRO: No, that's Magnus Thunder. You ever read comics as a kid?
Dr. McNamara: Sure. Didn't every kid?
NRO: Marvel or DC?
Dr. McNamara: Ah, that is the question. Marvel for me.
NRO: Good. Thor. That's who I'm facing, in a nutshell. Mother fucking Thor.
Dr. McNamara: Then who's Maniac?
NRO: A fluke. A has been that never will be again when I'm done with him. Accident or not. I'm going to hurt him. i'm going to hurt him and the guy with his hand up his ass controlling the puppet he is...Mark Xamin.
Dr. McNamara: Right. I don't know who these people are. And honestly, since I DO like you. I want to tell you...I don't care who they are. I knwo that your anger and hostility show you DO need to get away. Get your mind off of things. Read this book and then book a reservation.
**Dr. McNamara reaches in his breif case and hands Osbourne a copy of a book titled 'Ten Nights in Ten Haunted Hotel Rooms' by Mike Enslin. Osbourne looks at the cover and smirks. He thanks the two doctors and gets on the elevator. He heads down to the ground level and calls his mother's home and speaks to the staff. He asks for the car to be sent hor him and about thirty minutes later a Black 2009 Lincoln MKS pulls to a stop and outsteps a young man of about thiry seven years of age, his skin a very light brown, nearly white. His hair was very straight, but pulled into cornrows. The man extends his left hand to take Osbournes lone bag and introduces himself with a bow as he removes his cap with his right hand.**
Man: Sir, my name is Caramello Cadbury. I am your mother's driver and I have begun serving part time as the family butler. Old James can't do it full time like he used to.
NRO: Caramello Cadbery? Either you parents were stoners or chocolate addicts. Which is it?
CC: Neither sir. My father was a British butler by trade, and my mother was a woman of Nairobi decent who lived in England and drove race cars. They fell in love. Alas, therefore I am. And because of my parents, I drive, I butle...and my name is the same as a great candy treat. At your service. Pleeas, get in relax, and leave the driving to me.
NRO: I think I will. Did Old James tell you where i want you to drive me to Caramello.
CC: Please sir, call me Mello. And yes sir, he said we were driving to New York City. Manhatten moreover. My parents still live in Manhatten, so I knwo the best way to get there and the fastest ways without being, ahem, aprehended, if you will.
NRO: Good. Good.
**Osbourne climbs into the vehicle and finds it is well equipped. He plugs his laptop into the power port and turns on the digital uplink to PWN.com to record his first promo for Showdown's non-title match against Magnus Thunder.**
NRO: Well, well, well. Magnus goes and wins the rumble last week and much to my sugrin, regardless of this weeks match, he WILl in fact get a shot at MY CWF World Heavyweight Championship at Global Warning. I know what makes you tick magnus Thunder, and will put you asunder. Hey, I'm a poet and didn't know it! Oh man, that line never gets old...but Magnus, you're time at the top has. It's time for you to once again realize yout place at the table. Your rank within the pecking order. It is not at the top. and before you start with your crap, let me justs ay that my owning this company now, has nothing to do with my progress thereafter. I don't really own the CWF...Osbourne Inc does. Now Osbourne Inc may be MY company but unfortunately I'm not the only person that owns it. I'm where I am because I'm the best. I was pulling the hidden strings of the CWF's inner working like a hidden marionette handler for months and months. I put Pledge in place to face Adams. I put Magnus in position to face Adams. I took Adams out of the game mentally and ran out of town on a rial with his hetero-lifemate Keith Daniels soon to follow. The utter demis of Shock value, alebit it temporarily I am quite sure.
I proved at Scars and Stripes that I was the better man. Magnus has the upper hand with this match this week. win or lose he gets his title shot. he gets a chance to ruff me up. i get a chance to look at him and see a nightmarishly sized maniac. Then I attack. I go on kill mode. I see my son lying there all FUBAR.
All because you didn't have the fucking spine to come after me youself? You want to jump an eighteen year old kid? You're a bigger joke now, a sader excuse for a man than you ever were before. You have xamin clock me with the National title to win that match, then you decimate my son and quite possibly ruined his career chances for what? A thirteen year old grudge? Let it go. I did, a lingtime ago. If you wanted me so bad, why didn't you show up last weke in the the rumble? Exactly. You DON'T REALLY want any of this. But, my little friend, should you feel froggy, feel free to jump. I'm sure you will. Jump me that is. More than likely just after I defeat Magnus again at Global warning. That's how you roll. Keep on rollin pimp. Your track runs out soon enough.
As for Magnus Thunder, well, his track ran out a month ago. Down his rail car is on a free fall to the depths of a crevace from which it cannot return. Get ready to see your name in the mid card section where it belongs big boy. Saturday. I'll see you there.
**Osbourne switches off the uplink and relaxes in the back of the car and kicks off his shoes. He opens the book the doc gave him and starts reading. Two days later the car rolls up to the front of a hotel in Manhatten on 61st street. Caramello Cadbery opens the door and Osbourne climbs out and looks up at the marquee. The Hotel Dolphin. He walks in and notices the decor and makes a mental note to send McNamara a thank you text. As the man at the counter approaches him, Osbourne lifts his trademark Oakley frogskin shades and rests them on his forehead.**
Desk Clerk: Good afternoon sir, welcome to the Hotel Dolphin. Do you have a reservation with us?
NRO: Yes I do. Osbourne. Rob Osbourne. However, I would like to request a specific room.
Desk Clerk: Oh. Let me guess. You saw the movie? Read the book?
NRO: Read the book yes. Movie?!? No shit. Listen. I'm not your avergae run of the mill client. I'm a very wealthy man. I'm kind of important. People know me. I will make it WELL worth your while to let me stay in that room.
Desk Clerk: As long as you know what you are getting into. Here is your key sir. enjoy your stay in room 1408.
**FTB**
