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| **The scene opens to find the CWF National Champion, �The Nitemare� Rob Osbourne sitting in a room at the Utah Valley Regional Medical Center in downtown Provo where he was taken after this past Saturday Night Showdown. Osbourne is in the process of changing back into his street clothes after being told by the charge nurse that his private physician, Dr. Rolf Von Heinreich has arrived via Osbourne�s private jet to oversee his release from the hospital. There is a slight knock at the door as the old German doctor enters�**
DR: Vrobert�vut have you done to yourself this time? NRO: Oh Doc, you know�the usual. Jumped by my own brother and beaten to a pulp in a tag match gone south after wrestling a brutal singles match earlier the same night. DR: Vell, your knee is in excellent shape. Zee X-rays showed no permanent damage that I can see. NRO: That is great news. Hey Doc, lemme ask you a question. You have been my doctor for 19 years now. I value your opinion and advice. Did you get the e-mail I sent to you last week? DR: About your opponent zis veek, zee Juggernaut? Yes, I received that. I must tell you, I reviewed the links to the clips you sent me of his previous matches in zee CWF and I believe that you are correct in your assumptions and I concur. Zee man is mentally unstable if he honestly thinks he can take you Vrobert. NRO: So, in your professional medical opinion, he hasn�t a snow balls chance in hell of winning this match either then? Good to know I wasn�t the only one that thinks he needs a room in Shady Brook next to my nephew then. DR: Zis is tanamount to his own undoing. In zee medical community zis vould be classified as classic �Delusion of Grandeur� vhich is a historical term for behavior characterized by delusional fantasies of vealth, power, genius, or omnipotence � often generally termed as delusions of grandeur or grandiose delusions. It is a Greek vord ,"megalo" meaning "very large", "great", or "exaggerated" and "mania" meaning obsession thus combining to denote an obsession vith, either in zee form of irrational perceived need for, or preoccupation vith one's own estimation of having and, or obtaining, grandiosity and extravagance - especially in zee form of great fame and popularity, material vealth, social influence or political power, or more than one or even all of zee aforesaid - and accompanying complete desirous and ombastic abandon; a common symptom if not the key diagnostic feature of megalomania. It may be a symptom of manic or paranoid disorders. NRO: Good to know and dually noted and all that jazz. Do you think his size advantage is an issue? DR: Vas it an issue vhen you von the title? I think not. Sure, your estranged brother had a bit to do vith zee outcome of zee match, but I think your skill and experience vould have prevailed in zee end. I suppose zee vorld may never know, vould you agree? NRO: That�s exactly what I was thinking doc � exactly what I was thinking indeed. But Jugs isn�t really a concern for me. I plan to make mince meat of that beheamoth in due time. What I will be watching with a very close eye is the match at Night of Champions between Sickboy and Paul Blair. The winner of that one gets a shot at my title the week after. DR: I can see vhy you vould vant to vatch that bout closely, however I cannot see how you vould be concerned at all. You have beaten Paul Blair more times than I can even recall. Vhat I recall from your days in the IoA, this Sickboy is no vorry for you either Vrobert. NRO: Doc, I never said I was concerned. Just interested. Of course they are all going to have to watch their backs a bit harder very VERY soon aren�t they? DR: Ah yes�.your son came by last veek to my offices in Nashville vith his official medical release papervork. I signed off on his complete bill of health. My how he has grown in the last few years. He reminds me so very much of yourself vhen you vere that age Vrobert. NRO: The boy does me proud doc. Listen, I appreciate you flying up here, albeit on my dime, to check me out, but I don�t trust these backwater hillbilly�s in Utah with this body. DR: Vrobert, I vill see you in my office at Vanderbilt in two veeks and ve vill take another look at that knee just to be safe. I vould tell you good luck, but I learned a very long time ago, you don�t need my vell vishes to do vhat you do Vrobert. I vill send zee bill for my services to your offices. Alvedazane!! **Dr. Von Heinreich heads out of the room and Osbourne trails behind him. Three and a half hours later his jet touches down at Orlando International Airport and he is greeted on the tarmac by his wife Christina Danky, who is standing outside of her limousine. They embrace and get in and the limo pulls off. Fade to the limo pulling up at Isleworth in Windermere. Osbourne and Danky head inside their home just as the rain begins again.** Christina: This fucking rain is killing me. NRO: Yeah, it�s been 5 straight days of this shit. This IS supposed to be the sunshine state right? Christina: Very funny smart ass. It�s the rainy season. I told you before we sold your place in Nashville and moved here that it was like this all summer every summer. Deal with it. NRO: Ya know babe, I just had an epiphany...this weather we're having, it�s kind of like big boy Juggernuts. He comes in with all his power and tenacity, much like a brutal storm front. Just like a storm front, he can do allot of damage in a short amount of time. If you take the proper precautions you can wait out an oversized storm cell. You hunker down and wait it out, then his sorry big ass fades away and the sun shines again. Like it will when I get the fall on him this Saturday. Then, it�ll be like having a weather machine. It�ll never rain again. Christina: You are insane and so damned full of yourself. You just tip toe through the tulips of your life and take it one day at a time all the time don't you? NRO: Uhm, hello. That's the EXACT reasons you said you chose m over old Donnie boy. Christina: Exactly. It was off the wall and full of shit. But I liked it. Listen, this weather, it is terrible. I've just had a long day at the network, and hell, you've had a longer one...good job by the way handing Blair his ass like that. The second match you had no control over Rob. Let it go. Your dance with Phillip is coming all too soon. Patience is a virtue. NRO: To hell with patience and virtues. I don't think he's stupid enough to try anything at Night of Champions, especially with him making his own stipulations, he wouldn't be able to compete in the main event match following my dismantling of Jugs. But, he is nuts, and I have hit him in the head enough times for him to risk the stipulation being enforced...so I have a little insurance lined up for the match in case things get out of hand. An Equalizer if you will, to settle the odds. Christina: I love the way you think. With your corporate mind analyzing a wrestling match. But it if it works for you, well, Sarge says if it ain't broke don't fix it. Me, I'm going to go crank up the hot tub. Why don't you go cut a promo on the uplink and then join me. Clothing.....optional. NRO: I'm on it like stink on shit! Christina: How romantic.... NRO: ...I know, I know. Sometimes I outdo myself. **Christina heads out into the screened in porch were the hot tub is located and starts it up as Rob walks into the office and empties his pockets and takes off his boots and socks. As he pulls the rubberband in his pony tail out he gets an idea and strips down to his black boxers and flips on the uplink to the PWN Studios and clears his throat as he delivers his first promo for the network special.** NRO: Hey there folks. I want to come and talk to you tonight. The fans. I know you are all out there watching this. Not sure who is what in this match or where it will go. When I was facing this seven foot five freak to win the National title. Pledge's intervention or not, the end to come was ineviteble. I WILL defeat him again. You people know my legacy, no matter what these scrubs in the CWF who say it is meaningless. You people were watching when I nailed the Badd Dream on everyone from Maniac to Steve Dart to Mike Stewart to Jeff Jericho to MVP and Z-Pac...Blair, Adams...Pledge. I've taken them ALL down. What makes anyone think Jugs will be the one who beats me? You people know better. I have taken down EVERY big CWF name I have ever faced. You have seen me put on the kind of show that makes you want to come back and love me or hate me, every week you tune in or show up to see what I will do next. How far will I push the envelope? How high will I raise the bar, even on myself? That's why you all come back and buy more tickets, even when your mortgages are behind, your homes are in foreclosure, you car just got reposessed, you just got laid off from your job, your credit is in the toilet, you can't even put food on the table to feed your ten kids and you haven't seen a dentist since Maniac held a title. But you still spend the money on gas to the event, the admisison, the concessions, the novelties, the parking ...but you still come to see me beat people up. You still pay nine dollars a beer and drink at least six or seven and get shit faced and then buy a four dollar soda to throw at me after I cheat to win. You still buy my merchandise, even if it is to vandalize it and do stupid shit with. I don't care what you do with it, just keep buying it. You buy my action figures for your kids so when they play with their Magnus Thunder doll and their Pledge Alligence doll they have somebody to beat up the good guys up with. I'm all for it. I know you people hate me. You love me too, you just don't want to admit it. Mr. CWF, Teddy Turnbuckle himself even said that the CWF wouldn't be the same with Rob Osbourne in it. Well, I am here to tell you folks, that is about to take a huge turn in a few days. Jugs will be history. In three weeks you won't even remember he was ever here. But somebody else will be. Are you ready CWF fans for what The Nitemare has in store for your summer? I hope you got recertified for your food stamps and your government checks and your unemployment checks, because you will want to be at every Showdown event this summer people. Just tune in or show up in Vegas to find out that at Night of Champions 2, what happens in Vegas will DEFINITELY NOT be staying in Vegas!!! **Osbourne switches off the uplink and heads out to the hottub and drops his boxers off and climbs into the hottub. FTB** |
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